Adult-FanFiction.org : Inuyasha / Yashahime

Reviews for Unexpected Endeavors

By : Scottishfae

From 4inukag4 on February 06, 2007
Ok... have to say you are making this a very good read... I rather like how you manage to keep them in character yet still make this your story. I picture Haru looking like Jareth (David Bowie) in Labyrinth. *horny chills and drool*

Criticisms:
I think we need to see more of that Jealousy you mentioned with Rin.
What is gonna happen with Kaede's Soul?
Is Sesshy gonna let Kags keep Shippo?
Please make the baby a girl, just for spite.
I like how you made Izayoi a friend to Sesshy, I think maybe her death made him colder.
I would like to see your take on what the point of friction is between Inu and Sesshy.
I would also like you to somewhere down the line send Kagura to seduce Sesshy and explore Kagome's feelings on that.
These things I ask because I think they would enrich your already magnificent work.

Just some suggestions.

Patiently awaiting your next chapter,

Holly S
"I must leave, for there they go and I am their leader."
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From cocoke5 on February 06, 2007
i love the story and can not wait for the next chapter of the story and see if sess and kagome fall in love and lvoe it . up date soon. be waiting.
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From unknown001397 on February 05, 2007
I love this story. It takes a good story to take my interest and your storu has done this please continue updating!!!!! :)
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From ANON - AIdeen on February 05, 2007
I love your story! Who cares what other people think!! I love it! Please up-date again soon when ever you can!! Sentail Mother is a great story also!

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From ANON - Gretchen on February 05, 2007
Don't worry about those jerks-I've read quite a few stories-all sorts and yours is one of the best! I do like Haru (sp?) and actually would like Kagome with him! Great story!
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From ANON - Anon on February 05, 2007
Please have a chap up soon Cuz i really like where this story is headed
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From Demonlordlover on February 05, 2007
I hope things settle down for you. Nothing can kill inspiration faster than critical remarks about plot. I understand about grammer corrections, spelling mistakes, and over all formatting errors. Those have actually proven helpful as sometimes the servers mess some things up and readers can point them out.

Plot, however, is another matter entirely. In terms of imaginative outlook, the author's opinion is the only one that SHOULD matter. It is your creation, your world. I know there are some who harmlessly give advice on how they think the story should go. Some authors actually need the input as they write on a 'as it comes to me' basis and run out of ideas for how the story should progress.

For others, like you, who have a definate point A to B plotline already defined, such advice can seem insulting. Most readers don't mean for it to be so. Some enjoy either trying to outguess the author or perhaps lacking the ability or confidence to write their own story offer up thier own ideas in the hopes that they will be idealized. There are a select few, however, who either lacking in social senses or through a general lack of common courtesy, insult the plot or author thoughtlessly in the name of 'helping' the author improve their story. (I'm not even going to get into those that purposely try to demean or hurt the author with hate/flames)

Either way, I feel you. The only thing one can do is as you did. Mention how it bothered you, and as I don't THINK it was done to intentionally prove hurtful, the reviewer(s) will see that their input is not wanted in such a way and will stop. Especially considering you're writing for no gain, only to provide enjoyment for others. After all, if you were doing this only for yourself, you could just write and save it for yourself. Instead, you offer it out to others to peruse.

It's a gamble on how stories are accepted or how readers respond to them. I don't have much to say about yours as I was waiting and waiting to read it as I sampled a little of the first chapter and knew I'd get caught up in the story. That meant it would behoove me to wait until it was completed to read it as I'd get antsy to find out the rest. And I was right...I am hooked. That doesn't mean I don't understand the fact that you've got a life and can't push it aside in favor of writing.

I've become a night owl to write and have the awesome (at least for me) ability to speed read that has transfered over to my writing, (Thank God!!) That's how I'm able to get updates out the way I do. Do I wait on dangling nerves for you to update...yes. I also wait for Rinseternalsoul (Madman rules), Sidhe, and some others I can't even think of right now. In my book, that means you've got something good that makes the wait worth it.

I do give thanks to quirkyslayer if she got you through a rough time. I've received some great advice from other authors when I hit a snag, or just readers who've never written anything but truly appreicate the efforts we go through to bring entertainment to them. Thinking of them, and how dissapointed they'd be if I just stopped after they'd put faith in me to finish my story, is what kept me going in the past through criticism and doubts about my ability to pull a particular plot off.

In other words, we've got your back. Be seeing you soon!
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From ANON - Unexpected Endeavors <3 on February 05, 2007
^__^ yes! thank you.... I'm glad to know you are alive and... mostly well! Yes, I
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From DAZ306 on February 05, 2007
I have been reading this in FanFiction.net and I'm just in love with it.
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From ANON - Lady Jaded on February 05, 2007
Good for you! You tell them! As you said a little criticism is good, but tearing you up one side and down the other is absolutely silly. There is no point! *whips out squeaky hammer and waits for the next idiot*

Now, I think your story is fantastic! I think you portray all of the characters very well, please keep it up. I was equally if not more impressed with your flashback. I would have to say its one of the best I have seen. Very few authors can say that they have mastered flashback chapters. Well done! Onward!!

*curtsies*
Lady Jaded
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From Tussi on February 05, 2007
Your story is awesome! I can't wait for you to update the next chapter!
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From ANON - Ava 365 on February 05, 2007
I'm sorry to read that. I really love your story, and I don't think there are any useless chapters. I agree with yiu when you say some parts are necessary for the plot and, although I would love to get to a part of the story where Sesshomaru and Kagome are together I love it that other men like her, I think that is intended to be so Sesshomaru reconsiders his feelings for Kagome, or so I hope. However, either Sesshomaru and Kagome end up together thus Sesshomaru realising he doesn't care Kagoem is human, or not I always enjoy a well written story. And your stroy IS very well writen. I just wish you would update sooner. This is the first time I ever review your story, I don't know if you will ever read it because I've tried creating an account and loging in but I'm not alowed.
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From madmiko on February 05, 2007
Aw! I was so excited to see this story at the top of the page because I've been hoping for a new chapter. I'm sorry you got some silly reviews complaining about the last one. While I won't deny that I love the ones with Kagome interacting with Sess (and the other suitors) MORE, I also appreciate the insight into Sess and haru's past. It also told a bit about the situation Inuyasha was born into. All valuable stuff. I'm glad you are going to continue with this -- I just love it, and I will be anxiously awaiting your next installment. (Until then, I think I'll go back and read it through again.)
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From drcomalfy on January 16, 2007
AH! I didn't even realize you updated! X_X (dies) I like the flashbacks, helps gains insight (squeal) I'm still fangirling Haru, I can't help but do so! lol. Okay, fine, at least I like the idea of there being "three" half-brothers ^_^ Great job!
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From ANON - Kawaii Kilala on January 13, 2007
I want to point out, that this was slightly pointless!!! I mean, why can't oyu work on Shippo and Sesshy hunting or something!? That would make more sense, ya know...and I am slightly dis-appointed......
But, this is like a flash bake sort of thing, like...why Sessho is so...dis-pasionat and stuff, with his mother..........
SO!
Up-date soon, and please state if it is or is not a flash back still or not? Cause, I was confused in the begining with InuTashio in there, cause he was dead last chapter, and then he's alive, so I was confused a bit until I realised..."Hey, this is a flash back! It makes sense now...sorta..." So like, please state if it is a flash back or not...
TTYL;
megan

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