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Reviews for Dream Child

By : LibraCourt
  • From angel23 on May 02, 2020

    I would like to see a sequel story to this because I want to see her see her family again I know she really misses them in the story and I'd like to see them reunited


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  • From Melody21 on September 04, 2017

    This was such a beautiful story. Definately my fav on here. You should think of posting it on ff.net or ao3 as well. Thank you so much for sharing this.


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  • From tinymiko on September 14, 2015
    I thought the story was excellent until it got all Oedipus. You are a great writer but please flag so people can choose if they want to read that kinda ick
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  • From Sublime_Essence on June 04, 2013
    Great job Libra I enjoyed your story and read it to completion until 4am lol. Hope you get to writing new stories eventually it's been 2 years already hehe. I understand fully though. Thank you for this one for sure.

    Arry
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  • From ANON - Ina on December 28, 2011
    You have some very original and promising ideas, and a fairly good grasp for writing. The plot line is interesting and flows fairly well, and for an AFF story, this is quite good. But there is still a lot of room for growth and I for one would be more than happy to see your writing continue to flourish and grow.
    Maybe it's asking too much for a site that is mostly for literary smut, but there are many points that still require improvement in your work that could turn this promising story into an amazing read, and I hope you don't take too harshly to my criticism, because I really just want to see your work reflecting the potential, devotion, and skill you seem to have that is yet unrealized.

    Here are a few tips to target:
    1. Realism: Even though this is a fantasy work and not really canon, the story still has a distinct cultural and historical context that must be maintained. Doing so allows your readers to better involve themselves in the story and enriches the plot. For one letters L and V do not exist in Japanese and their sounds are replaced by R and B respectively, a romanized name like Naylor would be virutally impossible, especially in the Feudal Era. And if you want to be a real history buff, names of nobility would probably have 2 or more kanji and often more tahn 3 syllables and possibly end with -maru, -mi, or -yo as they were names reserved for samurai and nobles. Similarly you sometimes mentioned items like a western bed (unless you meant "west" as China, as it was called back then ie: Sesshoumaru really was likely a prince of China but that's going pretty far into history) that would not exist (as the Europeans hadn't yet arrived in Japan).
    2. Characterization: Perhaps the most important point of all, for without it, a story has little substance. While you do a good job at giving your characters personality. You don't really stay true to that personality. Kagome for example, especially after defeating Naraku, would not be so weak to be defeated by a snake yokai, she also wouldn't have been so quiet and complacent for so long in Sesshoumaru's care. Keeping true to the character is a necessity whether you choose to make them OOC or not. The personality created and mentioned must be maintained within reason for the integrity of the story. Similarly after mentioning how serious, honorable, and intelligent Sesshoumaru is, he would not have forsworn his word or rampaged his home and killed his vassals (a huge stain on the honor) but would more likely be searching for Kagome.
    3. Plot development: You do a really good just at setting up the plot and getting the reader interested, but there were too many points where the delivery was a little lacking. Kagome's interactions with her friends, Sesshoumaru, the nobles, and the various interesting situations she found herself in would best be elaborated in order to better move your story, add substance, and create further meaning for your readers.
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  • From forever6661 on December 20, 2011
    I'm replying to your review with a review of my own.

    I actually did read this story a while ago and it is one of my favorites.

    ~ * ~

    And I know that there isn't supposed to be a summary after you click read story, I'm not an idiot. But I do apologize if the text was misleading

    But I did post in the Disclaimer above the text that the disclaimer would be chapter 1, the official chapter 1 is posted now as well and I hope you reconsider not reading my story
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  • From ANON - unknown on August 31, 2011
    wow!you're story is somethiin. .

    you built such a qood storyline and kishi's character was told in such a descriptive manner, that i feel
    you can build a story out of him. .
    i'd loovveee that. .to see what happens to him. .

    a continuation of some sort.

    thank you. . i enjoyed the story so much i finished it after a day and a half.. ;)
    job well done
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  • From ANON - unknown on August 31, 2011
    wow!you're story is somethiin. .

    you built such a qood storyline and kishi's character was told in such a descriptive manner, that i feel
    you can build a story out of him. .
    i'd loovveee that. .to see what happens to him. .

    a continuation of some sort.

    thank you. . i enjoyed the story so much i finished it after a day and a half.. ;)
    job well done
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  • From ANON - Missy Brown on July 29, 2011
    I loveed it you did an awesome job, I'm sending this as Missy but in truth you know me in real life...... I love it and keep writing
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  • From ANON - aleerasuru on July 08, 2011
    that was a really well written story thumbs up
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  • From ANON - shadow on June 26, 2011
    I love that story! It is now one of my favoirtes. I love the Shessomaru/Kagome pairing. Hope to see more stories with this pariing from you soon.
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  • From estelin on June 08, 2011
    i am sad that this is over. keep up the great work and writing.
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  • From ANON - puppydog on May 21, 2011
    Darn, it`s over already! I truly enjoyed reading this story. It was wonderful. The ending kindof felt a little rushed to me but it was good. Loved your story and I can`t wait to read more from you. Good job! Keep up the good work!
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  • From tohru478 on May 19, 2011
    Wonderful story. I loved it. The way it ended was great.
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  • From ANON - pauly on May 19, 2011
    WOW!!!! I really loved this story, the story line is great and the part I loved the must was when he was despaired to get them back. I´d really like another story in which he is cruel to kags thinking she did something wrong to him and later discovers she did nothing and try to win her back. I think you would do a nice job, but is just a suggestion.
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