Adult-FanFiction.org : Inuyasha / Yashahime

Reviews for Secret Possession

By : SakuraAngel1

From ANON - C.G on October 06, 2013
Please don't let Sango end her days in a brothel. Please somebody save her before she gets there.
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From Kain on October 06, 2013
And just like that, Sesshoumaru has no chance of atonement. As hard as I try I can't see any way this story ending without him paying for the crap he has done/caused. If he does come out of this as a karma houdini smelling like roses and Kagome magically falling for him it is going to leave a very sour taste in my mouth. Poor poor Sango, hopefully someone can save her before she gets to the brothel. Kagome is going to fuck someone up if/when she finds out what has happened. She already has more than enough reason to despise quite a few of the demons demons(I will not call them people) in the castle as it is. Inuyasha unfortunately is still on the wrong track and now Naraku knows something is up.

-waits patiently for the next chapter-
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From ANON - sheshar on October 06, 2013
Please don't stop here! I'm not a fan of s/k but your story makes me forget that little detail! Don't make us wait too long for another great chapter!
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From ANON - Guest on September 28, 2013
The flow of Chapter 6 is much smoother compared to chapter 5.

The development of the main characters was nicely done in this chapter. There was an unnecessary use of punctuation marks through many parts of the chapter but this isn't a significant hindrance to the flow.

It was good for the chapter to begin and end with a scene with both Kagome and Sesshoumaru as this has the desired effect of capturing the attention of the audience.

For the first Sesshoumaru/Kagome scene - it is interesting to see from the dog demon's point of view (POV) as it is vital for character development. However just be careful that you do not make his POV too repetitive or too lengthy in the following chapters unless you intend to change his perspective (ie. if you have the intention to show your audience that he has a gradual change of heart then it is worth expanding his POV).

Though it is interesting to see that Sesshoumaru is doing his part to pursue more than just Kagome's body as a mate and actually wants a relationship with her (which is probably why he considers her dis/comforts), I think it is also essential to add insight in the story to his curiosity about Kagome's past. After all, despite her innocent behavior she almost presents as a 'prostitute' with her type of modern school uniform - which is definitely not modest clothing in the olden days.

His eventual revelation as her mate will be most interesting. It will be equally interesting to see how Kagome will eventually open up to him if/when he shows an actual interest to learn more about her (in order to accommodate her rather than just satisfy his own expectations of an inu mate - which by the way she is not inu!).

The development of Inuyasha in your story is quite a challenge that few writers attempt. To view him in a good light - ie actually loving Kagome and not giving in to Kikyo, will make the story more interesting.

Also interesting is the manner that you have placed Sango and Miroku. These two characters are in love with each other but are also protective friends of Kagome. As you have not killed off any of the main characters and also kept Naraku in the picture it will be quite a challenge to bring them all in together and defeat the evil hanyou when their current perceived enemy seems to be the dog demon.

Looking forward to your next chapter. :)

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From ANON - prclark on September 25, 2013
I am enjoying your story so far. However I am requesting if you could please put this story on DOKUGA.
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From ANON - Kairi on September 23, 2013
I can tell you that I've seen stories that flow better, but I can not tell you that I have seen stories with so much life. Despite the changes made to accommodate a story of this nature, you have succeeded in maintaining character structure. It sometimes runs on, just for a few extra sentences that I think can be easily remedied. The truth... I don't care. I love the story as is. My only real suggestion, Remember that Kagome in her heart hates the death of any life. Seshomaru will probably need to learn that abject cruelty does not win fair maiden's heart.
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From ANON - Jojo on September 20, 2013
I am so overjoyed and actually feel like giving Sesshomaru a chance now. His compassion was so endearing here- and now the pups will live. I am so thrilled that no one had to die... and hopefully no one will (hint hint- Sango). Wonderful chapter- as always! *Wink!*

Hope your kitchen nightmare is over for now, but I have to say, I think it must be pretty awesome to work in a place like you do.
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From ANON - nari-chan on September 18, 2013
i am happy that the children are ok and the lord of the west really is showing a different side. ive never pictured him giving into anyone's wishes but he so quickly gives his mate what she wants. and are her miko powers help revive the children? or is it a mix of the demon aura and her own powers?
well great update i loved every word and cant wait to see what happens next. please update again SOON!!!!
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From ANON - Eiko on September 18, 2013
Omg! *squeals* I absolutely love this Story. I feel so bad for Kagome, but I am so glad she gets to keep her pups!! And poor Inuyasha... He's going to be heartbroken...
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From ANON - angel23 on September 17, 2013
Please update!!!! I love this story.
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From katiekrm on September 16, 2013
I second everything Kain said. I'm also rooting for Inuyasha at this point. I really hope Sesshomaru doesn't use the safety of Kagome's friends against her. He needs to work a lot harder at not being cruel. Beating Sango to a pulp does not qualify. Raping her was pretty horrendous, but he even had her hanging from the ceiling, which would be pretty painful, especially when you've been left that way unconscious. I'm hating on Sesshomaru, but I still really want to know what happens next.
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From ANON - Jae on September 16, 2013
I'm happy with the developments in this chapter. Though I think things won't go as sesshomaru plans.
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From Kain on September 15, 2013
Welcome back, nice update.

I hate AND like the demons in the very same breath, they obviously have a different standards and view on mating/rape and want to protect and serve Kagome but their ass back words logic and lack of understanding on just why Kagome is responding the way she is is only going to serve to make her hate them more. And if she finds out what they have done and are planning to do with Sango, then as another reviewer pointed out, she will never forgive them. Mighty big of Kagome to care about a child that was conceived through rape but it goes to show how much compassion she has. Inuyasha seems to be on the wrong trail and I am actually rooting for him to find and rescue his friends and give Sesshoumaru an ass kicking since you have written him very positively here. I like this story because it's believable with Kagome not just magically falling for her rapist like a few other stories unfortunately have and actually holding a justifiable grudge and not making things easy by submitting. Anyone in her position would have tried to escape and Sessh and the other demons in the castle have only themselves to blame.

-waits patiently for next chapter
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From ANON - Sweet on September 15, 2013
Love it, really good story, makes you want to read more. :)
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From 1CarinoInu on September 15, 2013
That was a beautiful update. I'm so glad that Sesshomaru actually took the time to listen to Kagome's plea for their pup's life, only to discover something even more miraculous! The fact that he seems to be listening to his heart and instincts more than the male side that wants her to be submissive to hims shows he has so much potential to make their relationship work out. They're off to a rocky start - shoot, Kagome still doesn't know it's him.

Now, I'm not pleased with the way things are going for Sango, and if she does manage to meet her demise the next day, Kagome will NEVER forgive Sesshomaru. Nothing will ever make Kagome forgive him for killing her best friend, regardless of what Sango did. I like the captain of the guard, though. If Miroku wasn't around I'd say that this could be the beginning of something quite fierce. But that's me, LOL. I'm always one for the odd pairings.

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