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Reviews for Kagome's Pleasure

By : ChelseaBase
  • From ANON - No one on November 19, 2006
    You must be a guy. That was very poorly thought out.
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  • From Iyasu on October 03, 2006
    I don't even have to say it, since so many others said it for me. You need to rewrite this. I mean, it's been a few years since you first posted it, so now maybe you have some actual sexual experience and can see your mistakes. If not, then read some good yuri like HAP's or watch decent lesbian porn. Better yet, just delete it until you do gain some.
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  • From ANON - Jeanine on February 04, 2006
    Good story! Need to write more.
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  • From on December 26, 2005
    *_* I actually liked it! No! Loved it! who would've thought this made such a sexy story. update pleez.
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  • From ANON - Samantha on December 18, 2005
    I LOVE IT.....i can't believe kikkyo would be kinky enough to have sex with kagome against her own will...but i think it was so AWSOME....i want the next chapter up as soon as possible.........
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  • From ANON - Josh on December 12, 2005
    hey good story hope u update soon and good story
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  • From ANON - N/A on December 10, 2005
    Continue the story!!!!!!!!!!!!
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  • From ANON - rakon on August 01, 2005
    I goota admit, not that good
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  • From ANON - Anon on July 08, 2005
    http://www.godawful.net/forums/viewtopic.php?t=15426

    Godawful fanfiction, you fucking moron.
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  • From ANON - bbmac on June 25, 2005
    I think you got your chapters out of order
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  • From ANON - Backinblack on May 21, 2005
    I don't think you're a troll, so I'm going to try and get through to you. You seem to have tried to create an erotic story without knowing a lot about actual sex. This leaves you writing fairly decently for a pre-teen, and getting great reviews from others in your same boat, but being slammed or laughed at by anyone who has really had sex. PLEASE read this review, re-evaluate this story, and clean up the writing and imagery. For older readers, it's hysterical, not hot.

    Constructive Crit- 1) Please read something about the female genital anatomy. You have it all wrong and it is quite distracting for anyone who has ever actually seen a naked person or had sex with a real woman. (Hint: The "clit" is a little bump above the vaginal opening- you cannot put anything in it. The navel has nothing to do with sex in any real way) 2) Read up on sex if you are too young to do it- fisting someone moments after breaking their hymen would cause agony, especially if the "fister" was not EXTREMELY experienced and the "fistee" had not had weeks or months worth of gradual stretching. 3) Some women are multi-orgasmic, but even for the most excitiable, arousable woman more than a few orgasms is a rarity. Having more than 10 roaring climaxes in under a few hours is at the very edge of physical possibility and would probably leave the recipient exhausted and so sensitive to touch that anything would be painful (or, conversely, numb). 4) When the hyman breaks there is bleeding and pain for most women; the degree varies. For most girls, sex the first time is uncomfortable, if not painful too, because the vaginal walls have not been stretched before and most young boys think like you- open it up, shove it in and out, wonder why she is smacking you in the head or crying...

    Have an older beta read this and give you some specific pointers- please pick someone who has actually had sex for a few YEARS (not a few times with another 14 year old). The audience who thinks this piece is "hot" are just like you- confused over how the whole thing actually works and excited by mental and verbal images they don't really understand.
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  • From ANON - Anon on May 20, 2005
    I call troll.
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  • From ANON - Visp on May 18, 2005
    Let me guess, you're a male virgin who's never even seen decent Lesbian porn before, right? And judging from your English writing skills, in fourth grade.
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  • From ANON - The goat\'s dingleberries on May 18, 2005
    Virgins shouldn't attempt to write porn.

    Tho' the results ARE fun to mock.

    mock-mock-mockity-mock.
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  • From ANON - whatever on April 24, 2005
    Your story is good, a lot of action. But you need to stop exagerating the organsms and whats with the hymen stuff. When Kagome's hymen broke thats realistic, but Kikyos? I don't think so. You need to describe more on what the characters feel, and what they are thinking. And if you're going to say they're going to orgasm, you should describe how and other stuff, describe the orgasm. And i'm confused with the ropes. When Kagome was pleasuring Kikyo was she still held by the ropes? And when kikyo fucked kagome from the ass you should have made kikyo pleasure kagome's clilt.
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