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Reviews for Something Missing

By : Sannah
  • From kuramasgirl on August 23, 2010
    this is the 1st time iv seen kags w/ sephy. they actually make a pretty cute couple. fluffy could use a lesson on how 2 treat ppl. hes a grade A bastard in ur story. but i guess its intentional. is jareth the guy played by bowie? cause thats the only goblen king i can think of. please update soon.
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  • From kcg on March 25, 2008
    I'm still waiting for more chapters. Check your e-mail.
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  • From Shanalir on December 27, 2007
    Wow!! Just.. Wow!!! I love Alana, she's got a great character. And the scene where Jareth wound up in Sephiroth's dream was hilarious!! The story's flowing great, and I can't wait to see what happens next. And you say that my reviews are what are keeping you writing? I'm stunned, because the way this story goes, it looks to be simply overflowing with ionspiration and creativity. But keep writing, and I'll keep reading, reviewing, and most of all, ENJOYING!!!!
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  • From Shanalir on October 18, 2007
    OK, first, I love the latest chapter. The way you described Alana's character, and the history of her bloodline and the sirens was wonderful. Well written (didn't sound at all like an excerpt from an encyclopedia) and very imaginative. And I could just see the look in Jareth's eyes when he relized that she was exactly who he was afraid to hope she'd be. I really can't wait for the next chapter, when (I'm sure) she's going to tell him that he's her true mate. I'm so looking forward to that. And nothing about that is going to be rushed because they already have an established intimate history.

    And second, yes, the scene with Sephiroth and Kagome flows much better now. The setup is much better, and her reasoning as well as his reaction to her opening words are much more believable. All together, the scene has much more substance now, and Sephiroth has a reson to be listening to her story without interrupting her. When I read through the chapter again, the flow was so even and smooth that I had to go back and reread it to find what you altered. I got so wrapped up in the story that I forgot that it had ever been different. Altogether, this was a wonderful update! And I can't wait for the next one!
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  • From CharlieLevoy on October 12, 2007
    I just found this story today so sorry that I haven't reviewed before. So far I am really enjoying this story and would love to see you continue rather than delete it. I hope that someone else besides me reviews because I don't think two reviews from the same person would count. Hope I get to read more soon. ^_^ ~C.L.~
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  • From stumi71 on October 02, 2007
    Please continue with the story, I like and have just found this very interesting story, it provides the perfect mix of male yummyness.
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  • From bluemoon1755 on September 29, 2007
    Yes! I wish you would continue this story, it's really fantastic and I can't wait to read more so I hope you try and update as soon as you can.
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  • From Maru on September 28, 2007
    update please i love this story.
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  • From Shanalir on August 08, 2007
    My computer's been down, so I missed the last update. It's a really great start to a relationship between Sephiroth and kagome, but the part where kagome tells Sephiroth about herself seems a tad rushed. I mean, she just says "I have something to tell you." She doesn't say, "I need to tell you this" or "I hope you believe this" or anything like that to prepare him a little for the incredible story she's about to tell him. She just blurts it out. Even something as simple as "I hope you don't think I'm crazy" would slow it down enough to maintain the flow a little better. I hope this isn't coming accross as a hypercritical nitpick, it's really meant to be a friendly suggestion. This chapter really carries things along nicely, and you've done a spectacular job of setting the scene for the next plot twist. Overall, it's a great chapter, i just think it could be improved a little. Although, either way, it doesn't detract from the quality of the story at all.
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  • From Shanalir on July 27, 2007
    Wow. Sephiroth's going to be aging like a human! There's a twist and a half. I can't wait to see how this ties in to the rest of the plot, nad how the story as a whole develops further.
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  • From Lillian9 on July 27, 2007
    Nice next chapter. I hope that Sephiroth will get back his elongated life span somehow.
    Yes, there are many Sesshoumaru/Kagome stories out there. Nearly as many as InuYasha/Kagome. I couldn´t say that I am sick of them, but sometimes they get really boring (nearly always the same plot...)
    Again... Please update soon!
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  • From Lillian9 on July 25, 2007
    Sephiroth/Kagome? That is a first. I absolutely look forward to it. Keep up the good work and PLEASE update soon!!!
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  • From Shanalir on July 25, 2007
    Wow. Sesshoumaru is a real jerk. I like the way you've portrayed Sephiroth, though. And witht he way you've written him, he and Kagome look to be a great pairing. My pet peeves? I don't see any sign of your story deteriorating far enough to let any of them creep in, but as you asked:

    1. Run-on sentences

    2. Blatant misspelling (I can tolerate a word misspelled here and there, but when you can't go more than five words without misspelling one, I have a problem.)

    3. Missing or misused puctuation. (Again a goof here and there doesn't get to me, but a dearth of commas and apostraphes gives me headaches. I've actually seen fanfics that the author didn't use any punctation except the period. Not even quotation marks *shudder*)

    4.; Stories that are written like a (poor) school essay (E.G.: '"Oh my god you are so perfect I can't believe you aremine" he said passionately kissing her.')

    5. Stories that run too fast, where there really isn't enough time for the characters to develop the motivation for what they're doing.

    And I think that's it. Those are the ones I hate the most, anyway. And unless you change your current writing style dramatically, I can't see any of these creeping in. Your story is paced nicely, you have obviously taken the time to write it well, and check your spelling and punctuation, and it actually reads like a story, not just a recounting of a series of events and statements. I'm really enjoying it, and looking forward to more.
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  • From Shanalir on July 19, 2007
    Wow, I really enjoyed reading this so far. The story is progressing at a nice pace, everything is explained, but not over explained, and the spelling, punctuation and grammar are very good. In short, an intriguing plot, none of my pet peeves are present, and it's shaping up to be a great story! I'm looking forward to the next chapter!
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  • From xoulblade on July 16, 2007
    excellent start on this story, please update soon!!
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