rate_review Reviews

So tell me how do you like the revised edition?
Signed,
Miroku the Hentai Houshi

I liked the storyline a lot and I think this can turn into a really good fic; however, you absolutely need to find a beta. Your sentences are all smashed together, making it difficult to read. You have a ton of typos and no paragraphs. It also looks like you're missing a section from when Sessh was watching Miroku to Miroku in his bed. If you want to go and do a quick editing job on this story, just move the dialogue to a separate line. That at least will be a quick fix to make it easier to read until you can find a beta. And this is not a flame at all. I'm just expressing some advise that will help other readers enjoy this story more. You really do a have good plot and storyline and great ideas. Good Luck with the next chapter ^_^

In response to the replies. This is not a one shot, I really do enjoy writting this kind of thing but I never get around to editing it. I was going to spell check everything but it was like 2 am and I had to be up to bike to school at like 6:30 am so yeah. I really do need a beta, I was reading through it after I got some sleep and got embarrassed by all my typos. As I type this I am making a rewrite, it is going to be longer and more detailed, but hopefully you'll like it even more. At this point I will accept almost anyone as a beta and will give you credits for a job well done. To ask to be a beta contact me via aim nicvkname: origmiroku or via email inuyashagang@hotmail.com. I also use msn as well, you can add me through the hotmail address on my profile; please I really need a beta that isn't disgusted by yaoi. *gets on his houshi knees and begs while making puppy dog eyes*
Signed,
The Hentai Houshi

Interesting plot and not a bad story idea, the only thing that really bothered me was your spelling, no offence, but you might want to get a beta to read your stories before you upload them. Mostly because many readers will be kind of bitchiy about it, like I am being right now:), but as said I really liked it and I do hope you will keep writing.

cool fanfic

I enjoyed reading this story.

I look forward to reading the next chapters.

i loved your story and the plot but you have all youe sentences clumped together. it gets really difficult to read. i don't mean to say anything bad but i think you should get a beta. however your story is very good. i liked it

wow! this is a nice story. i like it... you are doing great but... can you get the sentences eparated from one another. i mean sesshy and miroku's speeches are all jumbled up together. its really annyoing.

awwww!!! i liked it! this isn't a oneshot is it? keep going! oh, and your format is somtimes difficult. you should have more paragraphs. i lose my place easily in all those letters... and i think part of the story got accidentally deleted. it jumped from sess watching him to miroku liking to cuddle... i'm excited for the next chapter! i love miroku yaoi!!