Darkness and Light | By : Avarwen Category: InuYasha > Yaoi - Male/Male > InuYasha/Sessh?maru > InuYasha/Sessh?maru Views: 5394 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0 |
Disclaimer: I do not own InuYasha, nor make money from this story. |
WARNINGS: Angst, Yaoi, Inucest, Anal, H/C, N/C, and mentions of minor - Do not read if you think for a moment that you can’t handle these things!
AN: Sequel to “Someone to Hear you scream” (Even though that was supposed to be a one-series one-shot-- there were just too many great reviewers to resist!) And the Sequel to this one "Scars" Is now up!
Okay, I thought I’d answer some of the reviews to the last story here, so here it goes:
Purity - You like it but... wow? o_0 Lol
Jade - Yeah, after all, who doesn’t like to see a broken, beaten and raped Inuyasha?-- Just in time for the holidays too! ^_^ Merry-Late-Christmas to you too!
inufangirl007 - Since when do I plan to do anything? (In reality, no, I did not, but you guys are just so great I couldn’t resist!)
Weathered - Well it was written in a strange and sadistic way, so I guess that works well doesn’t it?
djl - Well I explained how old Inuyasha was when this all started later in the fic, but, right now, he’s supposed to be a similar age to what he is in the series (about 15) though maybe he hasn’t been around for 250 years or however long he had. Hope that helps you. ^_^
someone of no importance - Yeah, it’s funny cause I sometimes like drama and angst and stuff, yet I absolutely have no tolerance for soap operas...
fgdsgfd - *sighs* Have it your way.
Anon - Well, if you had a life then you wouldn’t have any time to leave reviews now would you? Think about it-- no reviews means no updates, no updates means no stories. No stories means too much free time, too much free time means the destruction of the universe. You see how important it is not to have a life and to continue reviewing?
Dakki - I believe the term for that is sadist. ^_~
? - Well it’s nice to know that some people pay attention to what I say. Lol.
Kiara - Happy new year to you too! Hope you didn’t make any resolutions-- as the saying goes “they’re in one year and out the next”. Alright, I’m caving in, and here’s the sequel to that story. I don’t think I’ll make a sequel to this one because it’s really a lot of work and it’s kinda distracting me from my other story (something which is probably soon going to have the reviewers out after my head), but anyway...
The Seeker - Well, yes, END usually does mean “The End” but in this case I guess it ended up meaning “End-of-this-fic-until-reviewers-sucker-me-into-writing-the-sequel”
Deity - Yeah, me either. I have come across lots of Sesshomaru and “Inu-daddy” as people like to call him, but never before have I actually seen an InuyashaInu Taisho. Maybe I’m just not looking hard enough, but still... Besides, it amuses the sadistic voices in my mind to no end when I make Inuyasha suffer. ^_^
Lill - I never said that Inuyasha was prettier than Sesshomaru. They’ve got different beauty: Inuyasha’s more young, fiery, ignorantinnocent kinda beauty, and Sesshomaru’s got a more aristocratic elegant sort of beauty. But his nose is too long. Lol ^_^ jj.
Lemon Crazy - Well I’m glad you enjoyed it! Like I said to Lill, I didn’t say Inuyasha was prettier than Sesshomaru-- I’m not sure where you guys are getting this from, maybe the line “You’re so beautiful?” in the fic? I didn’t put that in because I find Inuyasha to be more beautiful than Sesshomaru, but just because... well it fit. Besides, even if Sesshomaru is prettier (and I’m not saying he is or isn’t) he’s “the trophy son” in this fic, and so Inu Taisho’s not gonna lay a hand on him like this. Besides, I just wanted to have an InuyashaInu Taisho fic, since there don’t seem to be very many of those around and I like doing strange pairings. Did that clear anything up for you? Heck, cleared up or not, if I managed to speak coherently, that’s enough of an accomplishment for me. ^_^
Anon - Nope, sorry, but Yasha does mean female demon. Youkai is just regular demon. However, InuYasha does mean dog demon because, according to a very helpful reviewer on "what matters the Most" Inuyasha was originally InuYaksa, which also means Dog Demon. I think that the people just thought that Inuyasha sounded better than Yaksa, and I agree.
(This is a sequel, but it is not necessarily necessary to read “Someone to Hear you Scream” to understand it-- it just sets up a bit more of a background for this one-- and this is, again, a one-shot)
HAPPY NEW YEAR (even though its not for a couple of days) EVERYONE!
DISCLAIMER, READ AND UNDERSTAND THIS OR DO NOT CONTINUE!: I do not own Inuyasha, Sesshomaru, Izayoi or Inu Taisho (or any of the other Inuyasha characters for that matter) and make no money off of them. This story is written purely for the pleasure of the sadistic little voices in my head.
~*~
Darkness and Light
Sesshomaru tensed as he heard the scream of absolute agony fill the air. Tensed and clenched his fists and jaw, claws digging into the futon beneath him as he resisted the urge to go to the owner of that cry.
He already knew who it was, and what was causing it. And to go to it would only cause the next scream his brother emitted to increase tenfold in agony and pain.
Going to it would only anger their father.
And angering their father would only mean more pain. For the both of them.
He sighed and rolled over onto his side, withdrawing his nailed from the punctures they had made in the futon as he cast a glare at the ceiling above, the stench of ningen leaking down ever from this distance.
Izayoi.
That wretch of a woman that was Inuyasha’s “mother”.
That whore wench who had surely figured out where and why Inu Taisho went every night, and yet did nothing to help her son and save him from this agony-- did not even attempt to save her son some of the pain-- offer him a little of the comfort he was so desperately in need of.
Sesshomaru pulled his fangs back in a small snarl at the uncaring ceiling that had the audacity to block the ningen from his view, his fury leaking out to stifle the air of the room, as he silently cursed all three of his “parents”-- though only one had ever bothered to be such.
He cursed his father for being such a sadistic bastard and doing this over and over again to Inuyasha-- for destroying both of them. He cursed Izayoi for trying to take his mother’s place when she could not even be a mother to Inuyasha. And he cursed his own mother for dying and leaving him in this nightmare with those two baka fools who brought nothing but pain with them.
How he longed to kill those two-- his father for being like he was, and Izayoi for being so selfish-- wanting to stay with her mate instead of protect her son from him. She had never even tried to do it because she knew it would anger Inu Taisho, and she did not want to make her mate angry.
He longed to kill them, but he couldn’t.
He wasn’t yet quite strong enough to defeat their father, and Izayoi... Inuyasha would hate him forever if he killed her. And he didn’t want that. He needed his brother. Maybe not as much and definitely not in the same was as Inuyasha needed him, but it was need nonetheless.
Inuyasha was--or at least, had been-- very wild and full of life and fire when he was a very young child, before their father had begun attacking him, and his spirit was as free and strong as the demon-horses that thundered like streaks of lightening across the plains, and some of those things still lingered in the broken shell that was now his brother. And they were exactly what Sesshomaru needed to fill the void that was his empty life.
Another scream and Sesshomaru grinded his teeth because he knew that this time they were not being caused by his father. Not directly anyway. Some other demon Lord that had crawled out from the inconspicuous rock that was some faraway land was causing that, so that he would be satisfied and happy and would, perhaps, form an alliance with Inu Taisho so that the dog demon could get whatever it was he wanted from the man without much fuss.
Sesshomaru would kill the youkai when he thought to return to his faraway home.
Slice him up into little unrecognisable pieces, just as he had done with all the rest.
Make certain that the demon never so much as thought of Inuyasha ever again.
He wasn’t the first demon Inu Taisho had let touch his brother.
There had been countless others that had existed over the years that Sesshomaru had known nothing about, and he silently cursed the years of Inuyasha’s torture that he had been so ignorant of.
It had started when the hanyou was only about the human equivalent of six or seven, and, thinking back, Sesshomaru wondered how he could have ever missed it.
Inuyasha, always the hyper, free-spirited little red blob you saw bouncing off the walls and chattering about one thing or another, had suddenly grown very subdued and quiet-- even a little depressed-- his ears always drooping to the side, and his eyes always downcast.
Sesshomaru had been simply to satisfied that the hanyou had finally left him alone-- giving him more time to train to become the perfect son his father demanded he be-- to notice or care.
Inuyasha didn’t like to talk about his past encounters, and so Sesshomaru didn’t often press the matter, respecting his brother’s need to lock those memories away and receive his healing in a more silent and physical manner.
Sesshomaru shifted again, restless with the desire, hate, worry and rage coursing through him, and the knowledge that he would not be able to sate any of those things for a good while yet. After all, he would not be able to go to Inuyasha until both his father and the demon left. And his father still hadn’t had his turn with his abused (and probably drugged) brother.
Inu Taisho often drugged Inuyasha when other demons came to fuck him-- it made him that much more submissive and appealing and always stopped his brother’s occasional dangerous (if futile) attacks on the intruders.
Because Inuyasha could kill any one of them, if Inu Taisho did not stop him first.
That’s the only regret that Sesshomaru had when he stood, his hands bathed in the their thick, filthy blood, watching the carrion birds carry away the pieces of their bodies: The that Inuyasha never got the satisfaction of killing the bastards himself.
Well, never but once.
One particularly violent demon from some foreign country far away had left Inuyasha with a broken arm, a dislocated shoulder, and the inability to walk for nearly a full day afterwards (not that any of these things stopped Inu Taisho from taking what he wanted from the hanyou).
Sesshomaru had helped Inuyasha with healing-- both in mind and body-- and then had taken him on the back of the two-headed demon Ah and Un (which his father had given him on the birthday of his human equivalent of eighteen years-- the same year he had discovered Inuyasha’s predicament) and they had gone and hunted the demon down.
The wild look in Inuyasha’s eyes-- so full of fire and hate as they flickered briefly to demon-red-- had startled Sesshomaru slightly when he realised that this... thing before him was the closest to the old Inuyasha he was ever going to see again.
Inuyasha had stabbed the demon repeatedly, years of suppressed hate and anguish and agony spilling out into the sword’s thrusts-- though it would never be enough to rid him of it. Not until he was stabbing a sword into his father’s own gut would Inuyasha ever have the chance to heal properly-- to find release.
Sesshomaru had, after several minutes of wild and manic stabbing, had been forced to grab Inuyasha’s hands to stop him, and had received a full-on snarl in response.
The action had surprised Sesshomaru to no end, since he had never seen his brother snarl before (at least not in anger) but he quickly regained his composure and tightened his hold on his brother’s wrists, pulling Inuyasha tightly against his body when the boy thought to struggle and fight again.
Instantly Inuyasha’s rage had dissolved and been replaced by fear, and he had whimpered quietly, sagging against his brother in helpless agony as memories of other times he had been in this position had surfaced to the forefront of the hanyou’s mind.
Sesshomaru was, yet again, startled by the rapid mood swing, and he had quickly released his brother, watching as Inuyasha slumped to the ground, wrapping his arms around his knees and trembling as tears began to streak down his face.
‘No.’ He had said quietly, upset as his brother’s reaction as he knelt slowly beside the distressed hanyou. ‘No, Inuyasha.’ He said again, wrapping his arm around Inuyasha’s tense shoulders and pulling him into a fierce but gentle embrace, trying to let his brother know everything he felt from that simple touch. ‘Not ever’ and here he had wanted to say “again” but that would have been too great a lie for words, and so had simply said ‘from me.’ Instead.
Inuyasha had sat, tense and uncertain, in his grip for several long seconds, before shuddering violently and collapsing against his brother’s chest, his hands clinging and scrabbling desperately over Sesshomaru’s shoulders as his own heaved violently, the salty tang of tears coming to fill the air and the sounds of harsh, sobbing whines of misery reached Sesshomaru’s sensitive ears.
He remembered being appalled that any living creature, much less his own brother could make such a sound-- could feel such pain-- and it further worked to tear his already savagely ripped heart.
He had sat like that and held his brother until Inuyasha’s tears were all gone, and the hanyou pulled away, refusing to look at Sesshomaru as he rose silently to his feet and moved to mount Ah Un.
Sesshomaru hesitated a moment behind him, then rose to follow, taking a moment to let his poison drip over the pieces of the demon’s body so that whatever creatures deemed him worthy to be eaten would quickly see the error in their judgement (as well as to further destroy and traces of the foul creature) before moving to mount behind his brother and urging Ah Un into movement.
The ride had been silently, and Inuyasha still refused to look at him (though he did not protest when Sesshomaru pulled him against his chest throughout the journey, and then lifted him to help him dismount when they arrived), but when they arrived home and were faced with a very enraged Inu Taisho-- though not because he had known what they had done, but because Inuyasha had dared to leave in the first place-- and the demon grabbed him and began to drag him off, Inuyasha had looked up to meet his eyes, and Sesshomaru had almost wished he hadn’t. That look-- so full of hopelessness, and resigned despair... it didn’t belong in his brother’s eyes, and Sesshomaru’s heart shattered to see it mirrored in those golden depths.
The screams that echoed throughout the castle that night were enough to make any and all that heard them away of the endless suffering their owner was experiencing. And that was how he knew Izayoi knew of Inuyasha’s predicament: No one could hear those screams and not know-- and they had filled the entire castle with their agony-- the hopeless songs that were their echo’s residing for many hours after that.
Sesshomaru had cried for the second time since his mother had died that night. For the first time since he had discovered Inuyasha’s abuse.
He never took his brother to a slaughter again.
A distant creaking in the floorboards and the scent of lust and arousal spent reached him, and he almost instantly rose from his bed to move toward the door.
He listened as his father and that demon made their oblivious ways back toward their own chambers, before then, swift and silent as an owl, exited his own room and began to make his way toward Inuyasha’s.
As soon as he had the door open, the thick scent of his brother’s hybrid blood, as well as vomit made up entirely of bile, blood and whatever drug his father had used reached his nose, while the sight Inuyasha’s broken and battered body assaulted his eyes, and the sound of harsh, raggad breathing chose to attack his ears.
He approched slowly, taking in the way Inuyasha’s body trembled and curled in on itself as tiny whimpers escaped his lips, and Sesshomaru silently snarled in anger and disgust that his brother had been reduced to this... that this had been done in the first place... that he was unable to prevent it.
Gentle as he could possibly be, Sesshomaru lowered himself onto the blood and semen stained futon, wrapping his arms around Inuyasha and pulling the tense body against him, offering him comfort with his actions, not his words. Words were deceptive and could mean a thousand different things depending on the simple tone or the atmosphere they were given in and were often too complex to figure out. Touches were simple-- it was either gentle and caring, or harsh and violent.
Inuyasha’s breathing hitched slightly, and a harsh whine escaped his throat as he began to wriggle and shift around violently all of a sudden, and the next thing Sesshomaru knew he was on top of his brother, Inuyasha grasping him desperately, his eyes wide and tear-filled as he silently pleaded with Sesshomaru to please, give him this-- take away the hurt and make the pain go away.
And Sesshomaru was more than a little tempted to give in to his brother’s silent plea, but this was not right.
Inuyasha was hurt worse than usual, and he needed love and gentleness, not more carnal interludes. He tried to pull away-- to move back to their previous position-- but Inuyasha let out another whine or desperation, panic filling his eyes as he locked his legs around Sesshomaru’s waist, his claws digging into Sesshomaru’s shoulders (something the youkai decided to let pass for the time being).
‘Please...’ He said quietly, his voice thick and dry and rasping from the screaming and the vomiting, and Sesshomaru looked down at him, locked eyes with him, and he could see that Inuyasha needed this-- needed him-- right here, right now, nothing else.
And he wanted, no, he needed Inuyasha as well, but he still didn’t want to do it... it wasn’t right... Inuyasha shouldn’t want this right now... he shouldn’t do it... shouldn’t give in because...
‘I don’t want to hurt you.’ Sesshomaru said quietly, and Inuyasha blinked, a small hint of surprise flickering in his eyes. Then he tightened his legs around Sesshomaru, his arms wrapping around his neck as he pulled Sesshomaru closer against him.
‘You never could.’ He said softly, leaning up to place a small kiss on Sesshomaru’s nose. ‘They hurt me. He hurts me. You heal me. You’re the light to wash out their dark and I... I need you, Sesshomaru.’ Inuyasha said, looking deep into Sesshomaru’s own set of golden orbs, which were soft and wide (a rare expression to see on the youkai’s face) with expression. But he still did not seem entirely convinced.
So Inuyasha pulled him down, closer, and quietly said ‘Please Sesshomaru’ in a whisper that hissed across the demon’s elven ear and made Sesshomaru shiver. ‘Be my light.’
Sesshomaru stared at him a moment longer before, with a groan of desperate emotion, he leaned down to kiss his brother (on the mouth this time) and position himself at Inuyasha’s torn and abused entrance, not bothering to prepare him, just waiting for Inuyasha to signal that he was ready, and then thrusting in.
He was careful, made sure to be gentle, and took a lot of time with Inuyasha-- making sure that he put his brother first-- let him know that, this time, it was not about Sesshomaru. This time, it was about him. And he took in every reaction of pain andor pleasure his brother had, marking it down in his mind for future reference or to make sure he avoided doing it again.
He made Inuyasha tremble and writhe beneath his hands and body, watching the look of ecstasy fall across his brother’s face when he spilled his completion across their bellies and chests with a cry, and Sesshomaru felt, yet again, an arrogant sort of possessive pleasure wash over him, accompanying the knowledge that he and only he had ever seen his brother aroused, much less seen him climax. It was something that simply did not come from his father and the other demon’s touches.
He reached his own completion moments later, collapsing on top of his brother’s small body, exhausted.
However, he only stayed like that for a few mere moments, knowing Inuyasha hated the feeling of being trapped like that, before pulling out and off of his brother and resuming their earlier position with his arms wrapped tightly about the hanyou before him, holding Inuyasha firmly against his chest.
Inuyasha sighed almost contentedly and burrowed into Sesshomaru’s chest, seeking his warmth and acceptance, but, most of all, most importantly, seeking his love.
They lay in silence for a long moment, in which Sesshomaru assumed that the very fatigued Inuyasha had fallen asleep, and so he was rather surprised when his brother’s voice sounded quietly, a whisper that barely reached his ears as Inuyasha’s face was muffled by his chest, and the hanyou refused to look up from the safe shell of warmth and darkness he was not surrounded by.
‘I love you Sesshomaru.’ He said softly, and Sesshomaru stared down at him in shock.
Love?
He knew that their father made Inuyasha say such things-- probably to ease his own mind (though the fact that the bastard had that much of a conscience was hard to believe)-- but he had never heard Inuyasha say them so sincerely before. Never heard him say them to him before. And he sounded like he meant it.
He must have been contemplating these things in silence for too long, because Inuyasha suddenly tensed and pulled away to look timidly up at him.
‘It’s alright if you don’t feel the same.’ He said quietly. ‘I just... needed you to know.’ He looked down again, his ears drooping slightly (though it had been a long time since Sesshomaru had seen them stand fully erect) and Sesshomaru felt his anger boil and froth at his own stupidity while love for the being in front of his began to swell in his chest-- the combination of the two threatening to overflow and choke him to death.
‘Inuyasha’ he said, drawing the hanyou’s gaze to him, and Inuyasha looked up, their eyes locking, emotions rippling just below the surface of each pair-- too fast and far away to see.
Sesshomaru hesitated a moment under that broken gaze, before setting and locking his determination in place and, leaning forward, placed a gentle, powerful, possessive and, at the same time, loving kiss on his brother’s lips, causing Inuyasha’s eyelids to flicker down to half-mast as he drew it out long enough to steal the breath from both of them.
He pulled back and waited until Inuyasha’s eyes slid back into focus and met his own before saying ‘I will be your light, Aishiteru.’
Inuyasha looked up at him with wide eyes, tears quickly moving to fill them as he snuggled and burrowed into Sesshomaru’s chest again, his nails scraping softly and leaving thin ribbons of irritated red behind them.
‘Thank-you.’ He said quietly, his voice thick with emotion, and Sesshomaru, deciding that now was the time to end all this talking, tightened his hold on the hanyou in his arms, knowing he would soon have to leave him so that they would not be caught.
But for now he could stay here, and savour this moment-- savour the light and love that Inuyasha brought and finally knowing why it felt so right to be with his brother.
Savouring the moment where, for the first time in a very long time, he finally felt completely.
He had always felt strangely empty inside, especially since his mother died-- like someone had ripped a hole in his very soul that he had been unable to fill.
And, while meeting with Inuyasha had helped repair the hole and kept it from spreading, never before had he managed to find the feeling of being whole that came with this moment.
The hole was still there, Sesshomaru could still feel it, but now it was no longer empty.
It was filled with Inuyasha.
And he fit it perfectly.
Because they belonged together.
They needed each other.
They were the light to quell the darkness-- the only things hat could draw back each other’s shadow. Because they were the only ones in the world, it seemed, who could even see that the shadow was enveloping them. And they were the only ones who thought to try and help.
Even if it meant they had to love each other.
The way Sesshomaru saw it, that only made it that much better.
END
~*~
Glossary
Futon - A mattress used by the Japanese to sleep on. They are usually rolled up and stored during the day because Japanese houses are so small. I’ve actually got one of those somewhere, but it has a bed frame so that it’s actually used as a couch. ^_^ -- little interesting facts you never cared to know about me!
Ningen - Human
Izayoi - Inuyasha’s human mother
Inu Taisho - Inuyasha and Sesshomaru’s father (note, he’s probably not as sadistic a bastard as I make him out to be, but...) His name means “Lord of the Dogs” or something along those lines.
Baka - Idiot, stupid, moron, schmuck (<--lol, had to put it, it‘s such a fun word!), etc...
Youkai - Demon
Hanyou - Half-demon (Taken from the Japanese word “han” which means half and “youkai” which means demon)
Aishiteru - Love (used pretty much only in a romantic sense)
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