Adult-FanFiction.org : Inuyasha / Yashahime

Tasteful Creams Err Tasteful Dreams	By : PhoenixDiamond Category: InuYasha AU/AR > Yaoi - Male/Male Views: 5687 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: Rumiko and company owns Inuyasha not me. I make nada from this.

Chapter List
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Author's Rant: A tad different from my norm but I wanted to try my hand at crack.
You Didn't….Yes He Did
Yes he should be ashamed but he wasn't. Yes he should have a more discreet opinion on it but he didn't. At the very least his open appreciation of it should be confined within the strongest threshold with the ending initials P.D. but he could care less. As far as he was concerned there was not a thing wrong with it. And despite being warned on numerous upon numerous occasions, that didn't stop Sesshomaru from standing before this sizable building admiring the locations perfection. The absolute perfect purchase he's done in years. Perfect the perversity he had well hidden behind that expressionless face.
However two others weren't thinking the same magical twilight ideals their partner was.
"So, this is it?" Said the youngest of the trio Koga Espada, glancing around the torn down dump of a building.
"Yes."
The third partner Naraku Espada's left eye twitched. "And we're supposed to somehow transform this hunk of misery into a popular gather?"
"Yes."
The two demons shared a look before returning their haunted gazes to the building before them that has definitely seen better days. Perhaps 'better days' was putting it mildly. The entire structure looked as beaten as the undersides of Totosai's belly wrinkles. The frontal out post was covered from one side of the block to the other in waist tall weeds. The only view out of the building—a large panel window— was shattered most likely by a little delinquent and the remaining shards of glass were sheeted with a layer of green moss. What was once the front door now hung by one screw off the hinges, swinging with the occasional breeze.
Bottom line, this place was a straight mess.
With the lovely swish of long silver hair, Sesshomaru Espada calmly turned his stoic gaze to each disturbed man and said calmly, "Let's go," Before walking inside the barely balanced box building.
Naraku sighed and shook his head following behind the other man, with Koga reluctant to follow suit. He was still stuck as to the reason why they were even in this place. When Sesshomaru had informed them three days ago that he had a business proposition for them, Koga and Naraku had been up for the trade when learning of the possible profit. Since there wasn't another shop in miles, they didn't see the reason why they couldn't build a possible ice cream shop in the middle of town. With the closest one being ten miles away, it was more of a convenience for the citizens.
But as Koga scanned over the disgustingly dirty interior he was at a loss as to why this place was chosen out of all the other available buildings nearby. There was nothing attractive about the outer or inner prospects nor was there anything peeking his interests. He was the one in charge of advertising for this so how the hell was he supposed to make this look presentable enough for the customers.
When the three came to the center, Sesshomaru swirled around with his usual stoic facial, looking pointedly at both men, who in turn stared at him—one with a worried expression and the other slightly irritated.
"Your opinions?" Sesshomaru directed to both.
Naraku narrowed his eyes. "You want my honest opinion or my profitable opinion?"
"Either would suffice."
"Are you serious? Look at this place." Koga marched over to a pile of ragged tables and chairs and poked one of the rotten pieces with his foot. A mistake he learned the hard way when a cloud of dust suddenly erupted from the disturbance. As he backed away from the suffocating fog, his hand accidentally swiped a thick stingy substance. "Oh gross," he turned seeing a cob web stuck to his hand and waved it off, noticing the other layers of spider webs. "Damn I think Charlotte beat us here. I saw a web sayin' Some Pig."
"Then I take it you like the location." Sesshomaru nodded. "Excellent."
"Wait I never said—"
"Naraku your opinion would be appreciated." Sesshomaru asked to the last member.
"Very well," Naraku gave the place another glance around and pushed up the rim of his glasses. "In terms of honesty this building is ridiculously horrid and lacking any sort of taste. However profit wise I believe by some twisted miracle we could easily pull a decent profit to stay afloat for some time before earning a reasonable amount." Then he returned his hardened gaze back to the lead demon. "With that being said, how exactly do you plan on earning enough to meet the yearly earnings?"
Sesshomaru shrugged his right shoulder. "I have plenty of reason to know this will be the perfect area to provide our desired budget."
"You have resources that know this for a fact?"
"Yes," Sesshomaru walked pass flipping a strand of hair over his shoulder blade. "I happen to know this will be the most well established environment for the customers we aim for."
"Oh? And you have evidence to back up this claim?"
Sesshomaru stopped, keeping his back to them. "Indeed," One gold eye, by the slowest degrees produced the chilliest glance that sent a shiver up Koga's spine. "As a matter of fact, I can show you rather then tell you."
Uh-oh. Koga's sudden chill went ice cold. You know that creepy, haunting feeling a person gets that sinks into the pit of your stomach like a ton of brinks? Yea double that times ten and he was nearly to his knees. He knew this feeling all too well. This happened in the last three cities him and his brothers lived in and had to move because of Sesshomaru's special problem. The kind that was likely to get them all thrown in jail for the rest of their lives.
Naraku looked at the youngest demon and jerked his chin for him to hurry before they loss the retreating inuyoukai.
By the time they'd made it outside, Sesshomaru had only walked about three sidewalk panels and stopped looking straight forward.
"What's up?" Koga questioned looking around for the supposed profit. "Where's the money?"
"You'll see." Sesshomaru pulled back his long sleeve to glance at his Rolex watch. The time was two forty four and in exactly thirty four seconds the reasons for why their business would be the most successful of all would come stumbling out in a lovely display of youthful muscle, delicately maturing faces and scented odors of musk and male. All male.
Koga started whistling, nervously rocking back and forth on his heels, looking around the casual neighborhood not thinking much of it. But the funny thing is, for some reason he couldn't shake off this feeling of dread snaking up his spine. Naraku on the other hand was mentally calculating the possibilities of an affordable method for cleaning up this devastating trash heap his younger brother considered a perfect location. The costs of renovations could cost this much, the details and decorations, not to mention the expensive extermination of Charlotte and her million children needed to be taken care of—
Suddenly the wicked chill of frosted despair struck Koga the instant he heard a loud ringing chime tuning in three separate melodies. "What the?" Why the hell was there a school bell ringing? He looked all over for the source and when his gaze fell in in line of his oldest brother, he loss three shades of his olive skin. There hinted in the smallest lift was a smile on Sesshomaru's face. But oh no, not just any ole smile. No this smile was only reserved for one type of thing. "Oh God."
Koga gasped at his oldest brother whose glasses caught a peculiar glare off the sunlight to disguise the hidden aggravation. Koga didn't need to utter a single word to let Naraku know. It was too late. Naraku already knew what the deal was the instant he heard that bell and immediately had his gaze focused on the silver haired fool boldly waiting for the magical glory of his twisted fetish to burst through a pair of royal blue doors.
"Sesshomaru," Naraku removed his glasses and started to wipe off the slight smudge. "You didn't reserve this location for that reason did you?"
No reply. Of course not. Why would he?
Koga shook his head absolutely awe struck and gapped at his middle brother, a terrified expression mirrored in his cobalt eyes. "Sesshomaru you didn't?"
The smile grew.
"Oh God…"
In that instant, on the final chime of those sinful bells, the large doors withholding the illegal sins of any perverts dreams began to pour out of in rapid waves of multiple varieties. Tall, short, skinny, large, long hair, short hair, muscular slender. So many shapes, sizes and all sorts of colors. Every single one of them were dressed in the creased colors of smoky gray and white button up shirts. So different in appearances and yet every single one of them had two things in common…
"Sesshomaru why?" Koga whined, raking his hands through his long hair. Those things! All of those criminally enticing things! "You're not supposed to be within fifty feet!"
—they were all male.
Naraku pulled out his cell phone and dialed a few numbers.
—and they were all underage. In a combined middle and high school. Completely illegal.
Koga turned teary eyes to his middle brother, whimpering pathetically. "Sesshomaru how—how could you?"
Ah wonderfully delicious dream of terribly insatiable delicacies aimlessly walking to wherever they wanted to go. So many flavors varied from each little piece of masculine innocence and all of it would belong to him. Every single one. Without so much as a response, Sesshomaru turned on his heel and left. A thousand ideas burned in his mind of how he would attract those edible little villains into this ice cream shop. In three weeks, he planned to have this place up and running full thrust. Yes full thrust. Pun intended. And on opening day he planned on having his cream as the main flavor for whatever unfortunate soul walked through that door.
Hundreds or even a small thousand young males began to walk pass the disturbed adults, talking amongst themselves about whatever and what nots, completely oblivious of the perverse horror coming to scar their young lives forever. Each young man walked pass a distraught Koga who could visibly see the floating neon signs flashing jail bait over each boy's head.
A loud bang brought his attention behind them where Sesshomaru was positioning a sign in the cracked window saying: 'Tasteful Creams'. The title was originally called Tasteful Dreams but the capable D was scratched out (with enough force to nearly rip a hole in the material) and replaced with a bright red C.
"Naraku," Koga groaned witnessing the terrible mess pooling by the second in bucket loads. Oh these little poor devils had no idea what the hell just blew into town. "What are we gonna do?"
Naraku tapped the screen of his I-Touch and pushed up his glasses. "Nothing we can do now expect keep the police on speed dial."

TBC: Freaky yes I know but I hope it was funny. It won't be a long story. It's pretty much for fun.
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Tasteful Creams Err Tasteful Dreams