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Five Days	By : Saranwyn Category: InuYasha > Yaoi - Male/Male > InuYasha/Sessh?maru > InuYasha/Sessh?maru Views: 6396 -:- Recommendations : 1 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own InuYasha. These fictions are for entertainment purposes only and I do not make any money off of them.

Chapter List
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InuYasha tilted his nose to the wind, frowning. He'd been out taking a walk while the others were eating dinner. He sniffed again to be sure. Yes, that was Sesshoumaru…and judging from how heavy his scent was, he was bleeding. Curious, more than worried, he went to investigate. Sesshoumaru was a 300-year-old demon; he could handle himself. But it had been a long time since InuYasha had seen his older half-brother even get nicked, let alone spill enough blood to produce this scent.
Sesshoumaru was sitting on the forest floor, leaned back against a tree, his eyes closed. Blood stained his clothes – though his youkai had already repaired them. InuYasha stared for a moment. What happened to him? he wondered. I mean, he's… InuYasha's mind ceased to work when he realized just how much blood Sesshoumaru had lost – it had soaked the ground around him – and that his brother was indeed bleeding to death.
"If you've come to jeer and bark, Little One," Sesshoumaru murmured, not even opening his eyes. "Please go ahead and do it." Now his eyes did open and InuYasha almost jumped out of his skin. Even in this state, Sesshoumaru's gaze was terrifying. "And if you've come to kill me, a good place to start would be drawing your sword." InuYasha looked around, realizing a sudden absence.
"Where's Jaken and that girl, Rin?" he asked. Sesshoumaru sighed, closing his eyes again. If InuYasha didn't know better, he'd say his brother looked sad. Sad? No he's just tired…right?
"Gone."
"You mean captured?"
"No, I mean they left when they realized I was in no state to protect them." InuYasha's heart skipped a beat. What? N-no way! They…they wouldn't! But…Sesshoumaru doesn't lie.
"What happened to you?"
"Naraku." No, there's no way Naraku did this to him. "He was holding something over someone I care very much about…threatening them, as it were, so I…" No, no, no, no. Is he saying he just gave himself up? "So I traded myself."
"What did he do to you?" Now Sesshoumaru's eyes opened, again.
"Well, he didn't kill me, so what's the other way demons exert dominance over others?" InuYasha's eyes widened and his ears flattened back against his head.
"He…you mean he-?"
"Just his tentacles." The last traces of InuYasha's long hatred of his brother disappeared, dissolved into pity and sorrow. He let Naraku do that to him…to protect someone else. Maybe I misjudged him…all along, he thought. After a moment of staring at him, InuYasha turned and walked away. He thought he heard Sesshoumaru chuckle dryly behind him.
Of course he wouldn't stay, Sesshoumaru thought a little bitterly. Why would he stay? He would never. He never even pretended to want anything to do with me, like Rin and Jaken did. How could I even tell him…that it was him I was protecting? He wouldn't understand. No…it's better this way. Sesshoumaru's eyes snapped up as his brother returned, a dead rabbit, a bowl of water, and lots of firewood in his arms. He sat down and set up a fire. What is he doing? Sesshoumaru wondered, watching him a little warily.
"Sesshoumaru?" InuYasha asked softly. "I'm going to have to remove your clothes to get to your wounds. He hurt you a lot and if you lose any more blood, I'm worried you won't make it." Worried I won't make it? Worried? InuYasha? "May I?" InuYasha didn't make a move to touch Sesshoumaru until the demon lord nodded almost imperceptibly. First, InuYasha removed his shoulder guard, then his swords and obi, then his haori, kimono, and shoes, and lastly his hakama. Sesshoumaru's pelt, his tail when he was in his dog form, lay loosely around him. InuYasha frowned at the lacerations covering his brother's body. "Do you want me to do this the human way or the demon way? I understand if you're not comfortable with me cleaning your wounds with my tongue right now." Sesshoumaru nodded and let InuYasha interpret that as he wanted. Tearing some of his own haori, InuYasha dipped it in the water and began to wash the blood off his brother's body. Sesshoumaru sat perfectly still as InuYasha gently moved his body to access all the wounds. Then, he gently licked some of the worse wounds, his saliva cauterizing the injuries. Sesshoumaru watched his brother work in complete silence. InuYasha had actually expected his brother to say something, to insist that things were done his way, attempt to gain some sort of control, but he didn't do anything. It actually left InuYasha a little worried.
Next, he sat down in front of his brother, skinned the rabbit and carefully cut it up with his claws. Normally, he'd have just tossed the whole thing at Sesshoumaru and let him tear the meat from the bones however he saw fit, but here he was, now, preparing to hand feed him. There's no way he's going to let me feed him, InuYasha thought. He'll probably bite my hand off. But he held out a piece of meat anyways, surprised when Sesshoumaru, uncomplaining, took it from his hands. So InuYasha continued to feed Sesshoumaru piece after piece as his older brother's tongue, teeth, and lips delicately took in each ounce of sustenance. Once the rabbit was gone, InuYasha gathered up Sesshoumaru's clothes.
"There's a stream nearby," he informed his brother. "Can I carry you there so you can bathe and I can wash your clothes?" Sesshoumaru normally would've pointed out that InuYasha did not mean "can" he meant "may" but now, he just nodded. As gently as he could, InuYasha scooped up his older brother. It was a little awkward, because Sesshoumaru was bigger than him, but it wasn't like InuYasha wasn't strong enough to carry him, or anything. Sesshoumaru rested his head on InuYasha's shoulder as he carried him to the where the stream emptied into a lake. "I'm sorry it's cold but there are no hot springs around, so…" InuYasha apologized as he set Sesshoumaru in the water before kneeling at the water's edge to wash Sesshoumaru's clothes. He paused, halfway through, and set aside the clothes. "Do you want me to wash your hair for you?" Sesshoumaru looked up at him, his face unreadable, then nodded and looked away. Leaving the clothes to soak, InuYasha went to sit right behind Sesshoumaru. Slowly, gently, he began to wash his older brother's hair. Once that was done, he finished washing the clothes. Then, he helped Sesshoumaru get out and used his kimono to dry him off before helping Sesshoumaru dress, again, and carrying him back to the camp.
"Are you hungry?" he asked. "I can get you some more food, if you want." He was ready to press the matter, but Sesshoumaru just nodded, his eyes downcast. "Wait right here, okay?" As if I could go far if I wanted to, Sesshoumaru thought incredulously as he watched his younger brother walk off to get something to eat. Why is he doing this? He wondered idly. I have been nothing but cruel to him…as far as he knows. He has no reason to do this, and he has his own pack. He looked up as InuYasha came back with another rabbit. He skinned it, deboned it, and fed it to Sesshoumaru, again. "Better?" Sesshoumaru nodded. "Okay, well, why don't you get some sleep? I'll keep watch tonight." Sesshoumaru lied down, his tail moving of its own accord to wrap around him, providing both a blanket and a pillow. He'll probably leave once I'm asleep, he thought as his eyes drifted shut.
InuYasha stared at his brother's sleeping form. His throat worked as he tried to come up with an explanation for how he was feeling. But there was no explanation. He didn't even know really what it was he was feeling, actually. He let someone – Naraku – he let Naraku do this to him. He didn't have to, but he…he was protecting someone. Someone that matters to him. Who? Rin? That would be too cruel. Sighing, he absently reached out and stroked his fingers through Sesshoumaru's tail, which twitched in response, puffing up slightly.
Some hours later, Sesshoumaru began to toss fitfully in his sleep, a soft whine emerging from his throat. InuYasha moved closer to him, stroking his hair soothingly and murmuring soft assurances. His older brother reached out and grabbed the scarlet fabric of his shirt, curling his slender, aristocratic fingers tightly around it. InuYasha's gentle touches moved to Sesshoumaru's cheek. Slowly, Sesshoumaru calmed down, sinking back into a restful sleep…
Sesshoumaru awoke in the morning, expecting to be alone. But InuYasha was there with breakfast already. Normally Sesshoumaru only needed to eat every once in a while, but while he was still recovering, it was best if he ate almost as often and as much as a human. He stared at his brother, surprised and confused, as he skinned and deboned the squirrel he had caught. Slowly, painfully, Sesshoumaru sat up.
"Don't move too much," InuYasha cautioned him. "You'll reopen your wounds." He cut up the meat, again and held out a piece. Mystified but not about to complain, Sesshoumaru ate from his hand, again, licking his fingers clean. InuYasha suppressed a laugh. It tickled. "You want more?" he asked softly. "I can get you more." Sesshoumaru shook his head. "Okay. Why don't you just rest against me, then?" Hesitantly, Sesshoumaru obeyed.
()*()*()
Sesshoumaru lay with his head in InuYasha's lap, his eyes closed. His younger brother's fingers combed soothingly through his hair. He'd actually expected InuYasha to leave him a long time ago, but he was now ending his third day staying with Sesshoumaru.
"Sesshoumaru?" InuYasha asked softly. Sesshoumaru looked up at him wordlessly. "I…I don't think I ever really hated you." Sesshoumaru blinked. First of all, how can he say that, after what all I've done to him, and secondly, why is he saying this now? Sesshoumaru wondered. He would've expected that any kind of confession like this would've come when Sesshoumaru was on the brink of death, not now that the danger was over. "I think I was just hurt and confused, so it was easier…to get angry than to face my real feelings," InuYasha continued before Sesshoumaru could ponder over his words more. The older demon turned his full attention to his younger brother, waiting for him to speak his piece. "I was bitter, because…because I wanted your approval. I mean, you're…you're everything I'm not. You're strong and feared and unt0u…" he stopped. Crap, was I about to say that, just after the got "touched" by Naraku? "Unshakable, and…and everything. And I'm just a filthy half-breed. And I realize, now…you only behaved that way to protect…I mean…you were just protecting yourself, really. So I wanted to apologize."
"Don't." It was the first word Sesshoumaru had spoken since that first night.
"What?"
"Apologize. Don't do it. You did nothing wrong." Sesshoumaru looked away, again then sighed and shut his eyes to finish the conversation he'd started. "I behaved cruelly to you. What I did was wrong. I should've supported and nurtured. But instead, I selfishly blamed you for our father's death. I denied us both what we wanted. I beat you down and turned away from you and told myself the pain that caused me was weakness. I told myself it was weak that I couldn't not kill you. But then, when Naraku threatened you-" Sesshoumaru stopped abruptly, realizing his mistake. He hadn't been going to tell InuYasha it was him he was protecting. He let his breath hiss out through his teeth before he continued, now that his secret was in the open, anyways. "When Naraku held your safety in the palm of his hand and demanded the unthinkable from me, I realized it was not weakness but strength that kept me from killing you…that allowed me to protect you." He opened his eyes and looked up InuYasha evenly, searching for a response.
"M-me?" InuYasha whispered. "Sesshoumaru, you…you gave yourself up…for me? But…but…"
"He had someone planted in your group…disguised as a woman named Sakura, but she was actually a demon. You were all sleeping and he was going to have her kill you. In exchange for me, he had her leave."
"Sakura, but…Oh." A tear rolled down inuYasha's cheek. "Sessh…I-I'm so sorry!" More tears slipped from those amber eyes. "For me? Sessh…why? Why?! Not for me!" Sesshoumaru reached up and brushed away InuYasha's tears.
"That it was for you…made it worth it. InuYasha, I couldn't have done that for anyone else…Before he died, our father asked me if I had anyone to protect. I told him no. Until three days ago, I was sure my answer was no. But now I realize…it has always…always been yes, InuYasha. I have always wanted to protect you. Even before you were born…I saved your mother's life…to protect you. InuYasha, I…" Sesshoumaru trailed off, unable to find words for what he wanted to say. Instead, he half sat up, pulled InuYasha's head down, and sealed their mouths together. After a moment he drew back slightly, his breaths a little ragged. InuYasha's eyes were wide, his mouth slightly agape in shock. Losing the rest of his energy, Sesshoumaru lied back down in his lap, closing his eyes…and waited. He waited for InuYasha to return to his senses and leave. He's been raised in a human world. He would be disgusted…
"Oh," is all InuYasha said, just a soft, whispered "oh." Then, his hand returned to Sesshoumaru's hair. The InuYoukai lord lied perfectly still, processing what had just happened. I kissed him, he mused. And he didn't…do anything. I mean, he didn't reject or accept me, really. Besides the "oh," he's acting like nothing happened…maybe that's best. He felt a tear fall down onto his cheek and he opened his eyes to see InuYasha was silently crying, again. Sesshoumaru's heart clenched painfully, but he was completely paralyzed. He didn't know what to say or do. "I'm so sorry," InuYasha gasped when he realized his brother was watching him. "For everything."
"I already said not to be," Sesshoumaru replied, mystified. Why is he still apologizing? I don't understand. He reached up slowly and wiped away a tear, analyzing the wetness of his finger thoughtfully. InuYasha closed his eyes and sniffled.
"S-sorry…I'm sorry! I'm so, so, so sorry!" The next thing Sesshoumaru knew, he was pulled up against his younger half-brother's chest in a fierce embrace. He slowly put his arms around InuYasha, resting his cheek on the boy's shoulder.
"Why would you be sorry, InuYasha? You alone are here for me when I needed someone. You of all people should never have to apologize to me. After all I've done to you…all the cruel words and fighting and brutality…you should never apologize to me." InuYasha clutched him tightly, rocking back and forth slightly.
"I'm so sorry you had to…for me!" He's so upset about it that he can't even say what it is that happened to me. I never knew…he cared this much. Sesshoumaru relaxed into InuYasha's arms, nuzzling his neck. "I'm sorry, Sesshoumaru!"
()*()*()
InuYasha bolted to his feet as he smelled a familiar scent. Sesshoumaru must have caught it too, because his eyes widened slightly, but he did nothing. The next second, Rin and Jaken came into view. InuYasha's blood boiled.
"Lord Sesshoumaru!" Rin giggled. Before she could reach him, though, InuYasha had blocked her way, his sword out.
"Don't get near him!" he snarled. She shied back, shocked.
"Lord Sesshoumaru! Save me!" she screamed.
"Shut up!" InuYasha replied. "How dare you say such a thing?! How dare you even say his name, after what you did?!"
"InuYasha," Sesshoumaru's soft baritone brought the attention back to him. "She is just a child. Don't-" He was interrupted by InuYasha sheathing his sword.
"Fine, you want to forgive them? Go ahead!" Sesshoumaru frowned slightly. Why is he so angry about this? Then it hit him. He's angry because I'm willing to grant her something I never gave him…and he deserved it more than she…he never deserved my anger or hate in the first place. And this girl wronged me and because I'm willing to forgive her when I went all these years acting like I hated InuYasha… He stared at his brother for a long moment.
"I will not forgive her," he stated at last. "Nor will I forgive Jaken." He drew forward a step. "But you need not kill them. They will no longer be under my protection, but can you blame them for leaving someone who could not protect them?"
"Yes! I would never leave my friends, if they got hurt!"
"These two were not my friends. They followed me because they needed protection."
"It's wrong! You…you did so much for them! They could've stayed and taken care of you! They should have!" Sesshoumaru was having a hard time understanding InuYasha's deep anger on his behalf. While, over the past five days, he'd managed to come to terms with the fact that InuYasha did not hate him, he had not found solid evidence to come to the conclusion that InuYasha loved him at all, either – as a brother or otherwise. Does he get this upset over everyone who's slighted? He wondered. That would be an exhausting way to live…
"I know it seems that way to you, InuYasha. But I asked for nothing from them, and that is exactly what I received."
"It's still wrong!"
"Alright. I agree, InuYasha."
"Y-you do?"
"I told you I would not forgive nor protect them, anymore." This seemed to calm InuYasha down a little – at least enough that he could think properly. If he hadn't been so angry, he would never have threatened Rin, in the first place. She was, after all, just a child.
"Okay."
"Lord Sesshoumaru!" Rin piped up.
"Leave, Rin," Sesshoumaru ordered. She froze.
"W-what?"
"You left once. I am sure you can do it again."
"Jaken made me leave! I didn't want to! Lord Sesshoumaru!"
"Shut up, you little brat," Jaken snapped. "Do you want him to kill me?"
"There is a human village two days east from here. Go there. The priestess there will take care of you, Rin. As for you, Jaken. I have nothing to say to you. You are lucky to be left alive." Jaken, seeming to realize the gravity of the situation, grabbed Rin and fled. InuYasha sighed.
"Was that…the right thing to do?" he asked softly, his ears drooping. "I mean, I have no qualms about leaving Jaken, but…but Rin was just a little girl. And I…I pressured you into doing that…"
"Calm down, InuYasha. She really will be taken care of. Her lifestyle with me was not a healthy one, anyways. Besides, she must learn that there are consequences for disloyalty.
"But if she was forced…"
"I will visit her and get to the bottom of this, later. Don't worry." He reached up and gently stroked a finger down one of InuYasha's ears. "You should get back to your companions. It has been five days, and you have yet to return to them. They must be worried." To his utter shock, InuYasha's head hung a little.
"Yeah. Um…will I…see you again?" Sesshoumaru's eyes widened slightly for less than half a second. His lips tightened as he suppressed the smile that threatened to become a grin.
"Certainly."
"And will it…be like this…or the other times?"
"It will never be like the other times, again."
"Wait…I – um – I don't…know what my friends will think so can we…keep up pretenses?" What? He wants me to pretend…?
"Are you sure you want that?"
"Yes. I…I just want to have time…to talk to them about it…first. And I…I don't know, I just…" Sesshoumaru watched as InuYasha tried to fumble through an excuse.
"Fine," he cut him off with a gentle smile. "We will pretend like none of this past week has happened."
"O-okay. Thanks. Um…so…I guess…I'll get going." Sesshoumaru nodded, a little confused when InuYasha didn't move. Is he waiting for something? The demon lord turned to leave first. Suddenly, a hand caught his wrist and yanked him back…straight into a soft and oh, so terribly brief kiss. InuYasha's eyes were squeezed shut. The next thing he knew, it was over and InuYasha was hurrying away. He touched his lips, eyes widened with shock.
"Until next time…" he breathed.
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Five Days