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Groping and Strip Searches	By : ElfFromSpace Category: InuYasha > General Views: 4211 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own InuYasha, nor make money from this story.

Chapter List
- 1-Groping and Strip Searches
- 2-Least Efficient Method of Searching Someone
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Thanks to my Inu Yasha RP group who helped to inspire this little product of a deranged mind that is masquerading as a fanfic! Especially Sharlene who encouraged it, proofreads it and even wrote small parts of it for me, Majo who played Miroku while my Sango first groped him and BJ who subbed in for Majo and put up with Sango searching him for the Hentai Sango/Miroku doujinshi he was hiding, and Kelly who first wrote about Miroku and Sango reading Kagome's health books. ^_^ And finally to Rumiko Takahashi who actually owns the characters I so loved to torture!

***

Groping and Strip Searches

The moonlight shone down on the little clearing where the small group had camped out for the night. Kagome was crawling into her bedroll and Inu Yasha had just settled into his perch in the nearest tree when Miroku jolted upright from his position sitting at the base of another tree.

"Is something wrong, Houshi-sama?" Sango asked as he frantically searched his clothing.

"No, it's nothing Sango." Miroku stood up and looked around the nearby landscape, scanning for something...

"Did you lose something? I can help you look."

"Nothing important.. I'll be right back" Miroku walked over to the edge of the clearing and started back down the path poking bushes with his staff. Sango hesitated for a minute and then followed after him. Surely there were no girls way out here in the wilderness for him to wander off with, but better to keep an eye on him anyway. Finally, according to the great Rumiko tradition of Mush being a spectator sport three more pairs of eyes warily opened and their owners crept after the main entertainment.

***

Sango silently followed the monk a short ways back down the path they had traveled that day until he reached a particularly overgrown section.

"Ah ha! I thought it might be here." Miroku bent over to pick up the mysterious item. Sango snuck up behind him trying to get a glimpse of whatever he had been so worried about losing, but was finding it hard to see anything except for Miroku's rear which was sticking unusually high in the air as he tried to get whatever it was loose. "Damn! It's caught in the thorns." Miroku was so intent he didn't notice as Sango got within groping range, annoyed at how the voluminous robes impeded viewview of everything of interest. Especially Miroku's rear.

Miroku's rear??? What was she thinking?? She didn't want to see Miroku's rear? Did she? Sango's eyes drifted over the region in question which was wiggling around in a rather amusing way as the Houshi continued his efforts to free his precious item from the thorns without damaging it. Sango fought to hold back a giggle at the same time as she noticed that it seemed to be a rather well shaped rear. As well as she could make out through all those robes.

"Almost got it..."

Sango jumped when Miroku's mumblings suddenly reminded her where she was. What was she doing anyway staring as his ass like that?!? *HE* was the perverted one with a butt fixation, not her! She never woulmpremprehend his obsession with feeling up her bottom. I mean it was just another part of your body... wonder if he's got a nice body under there .. H.. Hey! Just another part of your body necessary to connect the legs to the lower back...it was so close all she'd have to do would be to reach out and she could touch it... nothing of interest at all, simply a particularly round set of muscles, what was wrong with him anyway that he found them so interesting... reach out just a little bit and.. maybe she should find out?

"Got it!" Miroku exclaimed triumphantly. But before he had a chance to stand up with his prize he was startled by the strangest sensation. If he didn't know better he'd say someone was groping him! Groping someone else was one thing, but this was different. This was HIS ass!

The three pairs of eyes hiding in the bushes bugged out just about as far as they'd go. Was Sango doing what it looked like she was doing?!?! One pair of eyes looked wary and shifted away from the others, as their owner didn't want to take any chances on the wench getting the bright idea to grope his butt like she sometimes did his ears.

Miroku flipped around with lightning speed and held his staff out in a defensive stance against whatever had assaulted his derriere. "S.... Sango??"

Sango blushed and looked down, refusing to meet Miroku's curious gaze.

"Sango? What.. What are you doing here?"

"I.. just.. You shouldn't wander off by yourself like that!"

Miroku relaxed, regaining his composure much faster than the demon-slayer. "Ah. So you were worried about me." He took a step toward his companion, a mischievous smile tugging at his lips. "And did you like what you felt?"

"I was just.. DID I WHAT????" Sango bristled.

"Did you like what you felt? I never guessed you were the type to sneak up and grope people. Or perhaps you were just checking to make sure I hadn't been somehow injured during my walk from the camp." Miroku winked.

"I did nothing of the sort!!"

"Would you like to check the rest of me? I think I may have injured myself on those thorns.."

"I would NOT! I'll show you injured!!"

"But my poor finger got cut while I..." Miroku had started to raise his hand to the light for her to see and stopped short when he remembered what was IN his hand, "Um.. I.." Miroku looked from Sango to the item in his hand and back, and then he quickly turned around moving as fast as possible to hide the object in one of his hidden pockets. Maybe she didn't see what it was...

"HEY! Those are my PANTIES!!!"

"I was going to give them back! I was just curious why it felt different when I groped you last week.."

The three in the bushes sweatdropped as Miroku found himself plastered to the forest floor with a large bump on his forehead.

Miroku moaned and rubbed his head, "So they're called 'panties'?"

Sango blushed, "Yes... Kagome gave them to me..." she left out the details of the whole conversation about how obsessed males were with this particular modern article of clothing. Judging from Miroku's reaction to them Kagome had been disturbingly right.

"Yes!!" Kagome beamed, pleased with her skillful and subtle matchmaking efforts.

"Now.." Sango stood over Miroku wreathed in flames, "GIVE THEM BACK!!!"

"I'll be happy to help you put them back on, Sango-chan." Miroku's cheesy grin faded under the glare she gave in reply, "Or not..." Miroku sighed, as his warm little fantasy froze over and shattered.

Miroku reached into his robes to retrieve the stolen undergarments and panicked for the second time that night. "Dammit! They must have fallen when..." Miroku trailed off as Sango's Glare Of Death became physically painful.

"I don't believe you." Everything living and not rooted to the ground fled the area. Well those with brains at least which didn't include the three observers.

Miroku continued rummaging through his hidden pockets under his robes. Hmmm... his money pouch and supply of papers... dirty magazine he'd bribed Inu Yasha to bring back from the future for him... "Sango... I don't have them."

"If you won't give them back I'll just have to find them myself." Sango advanced on the monk menacingly...

"S.. Sango!" Miroku gaped; distracted from being afraid for his life by the observation that Sango was incredibly beautiful when pissed off. Unfortunately, this caused a delay in his self-preservation motor kicking in, and he began to crawl backwards just a little too late. Miroku saw his life flashing before him as Sango pinned him to the ground, but at least he could die happily at the hands of the woman he loved.

Sango straddled Miroku, pinning him down to prevent escaping and began to strip search him. She started by pulling on the bow that held his upper robe shut, desperately telling her hormones the whole time that there was absolutely nothing sexual about this. She was merely trying to retrieve her property. It was totally beside the point that this bore an uncanny resemblance to a fantasy she had most definitely NOT been having recently.

Miroku was having a harder time denying how stimulating the whole situation was. When he noticed that a certain part of his body wasn't even trying to deny it he desperately hoped Sango wouldn't notice. While he was distracted trying to figure out what to do about his growing problem another part of his body started to act on it's own... With her sitting like that with her bottom right at his ar len length, it was just begging to be touched...

"Sango! You shouldn't rip my clothes like that!" Miroku looked in dismay at the large rip that had suddenly appeared in the front of his robes, baring his entire chest.

"Then keep your hands to yourself." She snarled, moving her legs so that she could pin Miroku's arms down and out of trouble.

Miroku looked pointedly at her hands that were currently splayed across his chest...

Sango blushed, "I'm only doing this out of necessity. It's not as if I want to see you naked or anything." Sango tore his robe open farther, and, much to Miroku's relief, seemed to have totally missed the pouch with the dirty magazine, "If you weren't such a hopeless pervert we wouldn't have to do this!"

"I'm sorry, Sango.." But Miroku was having a rather hard time feeling any regret for sneaking up on Sango bathing earlier that day and making off with her panties. He had no idea things would turn out so .. interesting... yet dangerous when he'd used his staff to retrieve the mysterious undergarments while he remained hidden in the bushes.

That's when it occurred to him that Sango's hands slowed down and were skimming lightly over the skin exposed on Miroku's chest and stomach. "Ah, Sango, the panties can't be there..."

"Hmm?" Her hands started moving lower and he decided to let her explore to her heart's content.

Meanwhile their audience continued to stare, totally absorbed in the spectacle before them. Far more interesting than cable TV! At least for those who knew what cable TV was. Once Shippo got over laughing at the expression on Miroku's face he began to get bored with watching what appeared to be a somewhat less than efficient method of searching. Surely Sango didn't think the 'panties' things were stuck to behind Miroku's ear, so why didn't she stop nibbling it and go search someplace else already? Anyway he'd seen something go flying when Sango had hit Miroku earlier.. Maybe Kagome would give him some candy if he found the 'panties' so they could all go back to bed now.

"Sango, do you think you could possibly get off of my hands?" Miroku squirmed trying to pull his hands free from his sides where Sango had them securely pinned with her ankles.

"Why? So you can grope me again? I don't think so." Sango carefully kept Miroku's hands pinned under her legs while she started scooting down a bit so she could work on getting the rest of his robes off. Sango's eyes opened a little wider when she encountered a strange lump below Miroku's stomach, but she refused to let herself think about it. She had pressing business to attend to.

Shippo crept along the bushes to where he'd seen the object fly and grinned proudly when he found the prize. He didn't get what was so special about this tiny scrap of cloth. It seemed too small to do an efive ive job of covering much of anything, but if he could trade it for some more of that 'pocky' stuff it'd be well worth it. He hid his prize behind his back so he could work out the details of the trade before giving it up and strutted triumphantly back to where Kagome was entranced, wondering what'd it be like to do that to Inu Yasha.

"Kagome!" Shippo bounced up and landed on Kagome's shoulder, "Look what I..."

"Shippo!!" Kagome jumped. She had been so absorbed in the show she'd totally forgotten the little kitsune. "Don't look!!" She grabbed the cub and covered his eyes.

"But Sango...." Miroku whined as Sango ran her hands down his side tugging the robes lower and sending shivers down his spine. Just checking for panties... Yeah right. Did she have any idea what this was doing to him? He needed to TOUCH her! "It's not fair that you're doing all of the touching. Shouldn't I get my fair share?" he pouted.

Sango paused to consider this proposition.. "I suppose so.." She released her hold on his hands.

"Thankyouthankyouthankyou.." Miroku grinned at the prospect of getting to grope Sango without being beaten in return.

"BUT" Sango smiled rather wickedly, "First I get pay back for every grope since the day we met."

Miroku's eyes bugged out as Sango's hands traveled farther down under what was left of his robes. Just how far was she going to search if she didn't find the panties?? Sango's fingers then got tangled in the robes and she tore them the rest of the way open in frustration leaving him wearing nothing but his leggings and void cover. "Sango..!" Miroku was totally lost as to what to do. When he'd fantasized about his first time with Sango, heck his first time period, it hadn't been anything like this!

Shippo squirmed; it was so unfair how they always tried to smother him to death every time he caught them watching something they shouldn't! Killing the witnesses wasn't a very ethical way of making up for their own misbehavior. "But they're just looking for th-"

Kagome blushed.. How could she be so irresponsible with the innocent child? "Yes, that's all they're doing. Now let's go and leave them alone so they can find them easier.. Inu Yasha! We're leaving." Kagome grabbed the dog demon by the ear and started dragging him away.

"Hey! Let go!! I'm leaving already. I wasn't the one who was so interested in watching." Inu Yasha's denial was somewhat less than convincing, however, when you took into account that he was blushing so hard that even his ears were pink. "Feh.." The half demon hurried off towards the campsite, followed closely by Kagome and Shippo who continued to squirm, trying to get free.

"Kagomeeee!" Shippo whined when she finally released his mouth, "Why did you drag me away? I thought they were looking for these?" Shippo held up Sango's panties.

Kagome stared, "You have them?? How'd you get them?"

"I found them in the bushes!" Shippo grinned, "I saw where they landed when Sango hit Miroku!"

"But that means... Sango-chan won't be able to find them no matter how much she searches Miroku-sama!"

"I know! That's why you should let me go give these back? Right??" Shippo waited for Kagome to let him go. Instead she only blushed deeper at what sounded suspiciously like Sango yelling Miroku's name in what could best be described as a passionate moan.

"Maybe later... I think they're busy now." Kagome stared at the ground as she spoke.

"But weren't they busy looking for these?"

"Yes.. No.. Just stay here, trust me! I'll take those panties. Here.. Have some pocky and then just try to go to sleep!" Kagome dumped several boxes of pocky and stuff from her bag onto Shippo's lap, as she took back the underwear that had been the source of all this commotion.

"Okay!" Shippo ripped open the first box and started sucking merrily on the chocolate covered sticks. Shippo wasn't entirely sure why Kagome was bribing him with Pocky, but he sure wasn't complaining.
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Groping and Strip Searches