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Blank	By : Crescentgray Category: InuYasha > Het - Male/Female > Sessh?maru/Kagome > Sessh?maru/Kagome Views: 19854 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own InuYasha, nor make money from this story.

Chapter List
- 9
- 10
- 11
Disclaimer: I don�t own Inuyasha.

A/N:� For my readers/reviewers, I cannot thank you
enough for your words.� Really, there is
nothing like reading reviews to make an author feel great about herself and what she�s writing.

Little rough getting started writing
again, but things smoothed out fairly quickly.

Last time:

�Shippo-chan!� Rin cried while Kagome watched in stunned silence.� She took a step forwards, then another, then
began running after the cloud as it sped away.

�Wait!� the miko screamed, skidding to a halt where the flower field
ended at the forest line.� Sesshoumaru
didn�t even look down at her.

�Kagomeeeeeeeeeeeee!� Shippo yelled, and then they were gone.

Blank: Chapter 10 � The Calm
before the Storm

There was a feeling of awareness
outside of herself, a feeling of being watched, and Kagome woke with a start.

She�d fallen into a fitful doze
while leaning against the stone bench by the cabin, Rin curled in her lap.� The little girl, still soundly asleep,
murmured at the movement and snuggled closer to Kagome, and the miko tightened
her arms around the child.� Glancing at
the sky, the young woman could tell that not much time had passed since
Sesshoumaru had taken her son, perhaps an hour, maybe two.� She had stood at the edge of the flower field
for some time before Rin had taken her hand, urging her back towards the cabin,
assuring her that Sesshoumaru-sama always knew what was best, always did what
was right.� The miko felt too hollow to laugh
at the innocent claim, and instead had allowed herself to be led to the bench
like a child.

There she�d collapsed, too
overwhelmed by the day�s huge emotional swings to walk any further.� She�d sat, staring into the flowers, while
Rin cuddled up to her, promising quietly that everything would be fine, Sesshoumaru-sama
had Shippo and nothing bad ever happened when Sesshoumaru-sama was around, he
would take care of Shippo, he would take care of Rin, he would take care of
Kagome, he would take care of all of them.�
At some point it had become too much and the miko had slipped into
fitful unconsciousness.� It wasn�t true
sleep; it was more of a mental shutdown.

Kagome hardly felt better now that
she�d woken again � her head pounded and nausea knifed through her
stomach.� With a grimace she twisted her
head and heard a sickening pop as her vertebrae settled into place.� Her blue eyes scanned the area, wondering
what had caused her to wake, and finally settled on the boy.

He was sitting no more than ten
feet away from her, watching her solemnly with his sad, hollow eyes, his chin
propped up by one hand.� They regarded
each other silently for several minutes while Rin slept peacefully on.

�You don�t remember me, do you,
Kagome-sama,� he finally said, more a statement than a question.

The miko sighed slightly, wondering
how many more people she was going to meet who knew her that she had no
recollection of.� �No,� she replied
quietly.

He frowned a little at this, his
expression so like Sesshoumaru�s that something twisted deep inside of
her.� He rose sinuously to his feet, his
movements so obviously those of a seasoned warrior that Kagome suddenly
wondered who exactly this child was, with his old eyes and young face.� He bowed deeply, respectfully towards her and
said, �I am Kohaku.�

Kagome nodded slightly, already
starting to feel worn out by the conversation.�
Seeming to sense her distress, the boy added quickly, �Master Jaken
informed me of your condition.�

�Yeah,� she replied dully, turning
her eyes away.� �I suppose you know me
too, huh?�

�Not really,� he answered.� �I only know you a little, but even I know
you are a very kind, loving woman.� You
are� very close to my sister.�

Kagome�s eyes snapped back up to
his at this.� �Your sister?� she asked,
not quite sure what else to say.

�Sango, the demon slayer,� Kohaku replied.� �You have no memory of her either?�

Kagome frowned and looked away,
shaking her head.� Another name she knew
only by the bare explanation from Sesshoumaru.�
He�d told her the names of the rest of Inuyasha�s
pack, and she suddenly realized with a twinge of embarrassment that she hadn�t
questioned the demon lord more about her former companions.� She�d meant to, of course, but between her
training, the revelation she had an adopted son and dealing with the
daiyoukai�s courtship, asking about her former companions had slipped her mind.

�
Sesshoumaru must not have told this boy of her companions� fates, and
she wasn�t feeling up to the task either.�
A little part of her cringed at her cowardice � she knew that the right
thing to do would be to tell him that Sango and Inuyasha were dead, but she
couldn�t bring herself to do it.� She was
just so tired, tired of fighting against herself and Sesshoumaru, tired of not
being able to remember, tired of not knowing the things she should know.

Kohaku remained silent, although
she felt his eyes upon her.� She wondered
idly how long he was going to stand and stare at her, when finally he spoke.

�I�ll fetch you some soup.�

Kagome watched him from the corner
of her eye as he turned and walked into the cabin.� She shifted the warm, heavy weight of Rin
into a slightly more comfortable position, leaned her head back, and closed her
eyes.� She missed being unconscious
already.� She didn�t want to think, she
didn�t want to talk, she just wanted to be left alone for a little while.

Only a few minutes later she heard
the boy returning.� Kagome reluctantly
opened her eyes to find the strange boy standing over her, holding a steaming
bowl.� Kohaku sat with another eerily
sinuous movement, so fluid that he seemed unaffected by gravity.� He would be a handsome boy, she decided, if
only his eyes weren�t so hollow.� She
wondered briefly what horrors he had seen to look like that.

He offered the bowl to her, and the
miko stared dumbly at it for a moment.�
With a little inward sigh, she shifted Rin so that the girl would stay
on her lap and reached for the soup.�
Kagome�s stomach twisted at the smell of the broth.� She swallowed hard and lifted her gaze to
meet the boy�s again.� He was looking at
her so expectantly that she pushed down her queasiness.� She took a tentative sip, and was pleased
when her stomach didn�t rebel as she half expected it to.� After taking another few bites, the miko had
to admit that the warm soup was making her feel a tiny bit better.

�He is a good lord,� Kohaku said
unexpectedly.� Kagome�s eyes snapped back
to his, and she swallowed the broth in her mouth convulsively.� �Cold, demanding, but rarely cruel to those
who serve him.� The first thing he did after
the battle was order me to retrieve Shippo for you.�

At the mention of the little kit,
Kagome�s face crumpled.� In a flash she
remembered his sweet face, full of delight and joy as he scampered towards her.� She dropped her eyes to the soup, trying to
see meaning in the dark brown broth.�
Even though she didn�t remember him, she�d fallen in love with the
little kit at first sight.

Kohaku shifted slightly, looking
extremely uncomfortable.� He cleared his
throat once, almost as if he was going to say something but stopped himself
before he did.� They sat in silence while
the miko attempted to marshal her feelings � she�d managed to keep her tears at
bay, at least.� It wasn�t just Shippo; it
was everything.� With a tiny, bitter
smile, she realized that finally, finally she�d found something that conquered
her normally ravenous hunger.

�Please don�t cry, Kagome-sama,�
Kohaku whispered.� Her eyes slid over to
meet his, and she found the boy leaning towards her, an earnest expression on
his face.� He took in her dry eyes and
anguished expression, blushed slightly, and looked down.

�If you wish to speak of it,
Kagome-sama�,� he began.� The miko looked
at the top of his head, noticing how his thick black hair curled just slightly
around his ears, and wanted to laugh hysterically at the idea of confessing her
love life to a thirteen year old boy.�
That was probably the last thing she needed.

The first thing she needed was to
get her memories back.� Barring that,
however, she needed to figure out exactly how she felt about a certain demon
lord, and how she was going to deal with his partially unwanted
affections.� It was flattering, of
course, to have someone as beautiful as Sesshoumaru courting her, flattering
and a bit frightening.� She was pretty
sure she was a woman of somewhat simpler tastes.

Kagome blinked, realizing she�d
been staring at the top of the boy�s head.�
�Um,� she began.� �No, Kohaku, I
don�t really want to talk about it, but I�d like it if you�d sit with me for a
while.�

He straightened, looking slightly
relieved.� �Does the soup please you,
Kagome-sama?� he asked.

With a small smile, she replied,
�It�s very good.� And please, just Kagome
will do.�

Kohaku ducked his head
respectfully, and they sat in a companionable silence.� The miko felt� well, she felt a bit lighter,
even though nothing had been resolved.�
So it seemed she was naturally cheerful, something that she�d suspected
from the past week of getting to know herself again.� That was nice.

Kagome didn�t doubt that
Sesshoumaru would return with her son.�
She had a sneaking suspicion that whatever The Word meant, it had upset
him greatly that she�d uttered it, and that was why he had taken Shippo.� To punish her?� Possibly.�
Then again, maybe he needed some time away from her to clear his mind,
as well as inform her son of her condition.�
Both of their emotions had been running high and the miko knew that if
it hadn�t been for The Word, they�d probably still be by that hot spring,
exploring each other�s bodies.

The miko blushed slightly even
though Kohaku couldn�t know what she was thinking, and dropped her eyes to her
soup.� She took another bite while she
mused on that problem.� She wanted the
daiyoukai.� Oh, there was no question
about that.� At the same time, little
alarm bells went off in her head every time she thought of the two of them in a
more� intimate relationship.� She knew it
wasn�t virginal nerves either � her reactions to him in the forest led her to
believe that at least her body knew about sex.�
Certainly, she felt nervous about taking the next step, but she believed
Sesshoumaru when he told her that she and his half-brother had been
lovers.� She didn�t feel all a-flutter
the way she would if she were still a virgin.

It had to be something to do with
Inuyasha, then.

Kagome had gathered through their
conversations that the demon lord had less than a stellar opinion of his
younger half-brother.� It seemed to her
that the feelings were likely mutual.�
And wasn�t it just a little creepy that the older sibling had this
sudden interest in her, especially so soon after his half-brother�s death?� Although, if she were honest with herself,
she had the feeling that while the idea bothered her, it probably wouldn�t
bother anyone else she might run across here.�
She knew, somehow, that it was quite common in this time for a brother
or cousin or some other male relative to care for, and perhaps even marry, a
widowed sister-in-law.

Wait,
Kagome thought suddenly.� In this time?

She�d been chewing on a little bit
of vegetable that had been floating in the broth, and she swallowed hard.� The idea was ludicrous, impossible of
course.� She didn�t remember the future
or the past.� She didn�t remember
anything!

The miko shoved that line of
thought away.� Speculation would do her
no good, and she was not going to
drive herself crazy thinking she was from another time period.� Certainly, she knew things that she knew no
one else around here did, but maybe she just came from a more advanced part of Japan.� Yeah.�
Maybe.

Regardless of where (when?) she was from, she still had to deal
with Sesshoumaru.� It didn�t really make
sense that her aversion to him had anything to do with Inuyasha actually.� She didn�t remember the hanyou, not one
bit.� Although the daiyoukai had assured
her that she�d loved his half-brother, the miko didn�t remember that love,
either.� What was it, then?

Kagome tapped her chin
thoughtfully, ignoring Kohaku�s continued, silent presence at her side.� Was it that he was a demon?

The miko thought on this for
several long moments.� No, no, she didn�t
think that was it.� Surprisingly, she
realized Sesshoumaru�s race didn�t bother her in the slightest.�

Was it that he�d obviously once
tried to kill her?� Well, that little
memory had been a big surprise, that was true.� Then again, Sesshoumaru had been honest about
their past.� He wanted her now, but
they�d been enemies once � that much she�d figured out.� Now that the shock had worn off a bit, she
actually wasn�t all that surprised that he�d tried to kill her at least once
before in the past.� If she examined the
memory closely, however�

He was different now.

Not just because he wasn�t trying
to kill her anymore, or because he�d developed an interest in her.� Even without this unusual courtship,
Sesshoumaru was definitely different.�
The eyes from her memory were cold, alien, filled with a soul-numbing
darkness.� Now his eyes were� still
alien, yes, cold even, but softer somehow.�
He still had a long way to go, but the shift had started.

Rin murmured in her sleep, and
Kagome�s gaze dropped to the little girl.�
Absently, she stroked Rin�s dark hair, and pondered the change in the
Sesshoumaru from her memory to the Sesshoumaru she knew now.� Rin must have had something to do with it,
the miko decided.� It was impossible not
to love the little girl � perhaps the daiyoukai had found her impossible to
resist as well.

A slight movement drew her
attention; the boy had opened his mouth before shutting it abruptly.� He rose to his feet instead, looking
upwards.� Kagome glanced up at him, then
up at the sky, but she didn�t see anything in the clear blue.� Just as Rin began stirring in her lap, Kohaku
said quietly, �He approaches.�

Kami,
Kagome thought.� I still haven�t figured out what I�m going to do!

�Sesshoumaru-sama?� Rin muttered
sleepily as she sat up in Kagome�s lap.�
The miko wondered how the two children seemed to sense the� the�

Suddenly, she felt a prickling just
on the edge of her awareness, and she turned her eyes towards Kohaku
again.� There.� A tiny pulse from him, accompanied by just
the slightest ache of emptiness from her.�
It was as if� as if Kohaku had something that belonged to her.� Or something that was her.� But that didn�t
make any sense!

And there, beyond Kohaku, far away
but approaching rapidly, she felt him.� She recognized his dark energy immediately,
blushing slightly as she remembered the intimate way his energy had wrapped
around her own earlier today.� It seemed
so long ago, now.� Perhaps both children
were more attuned to Sesshoumaru for some reason, or more practiced at noticing
his demonic aura.� Now that she felt it,
though, it seemed so natural for her to be aware of it.� And the thing in Kohaku, the thing that
belonged to her � she could almost see it embedded in his back.� How had she missed that earlier?

Rin had hopped up by this point,
dancing excitedly from one foot to another as her beloved lord drew
closer.� Kagome felt strangely calm.� Maybe� maybe it just didn�t matter.� His past, her past, their past, none of that
seemed to matter to the daiyoukai.� How
was he able to live in the moment more than she, when she was the one who
couldn�t remember anything?

He arrived as he�d departed,
although now the little kit was sitting on the cloud instead of dangling from
the daiyoukai�s claws.� As soon as they
landed Shippo scampered away from Sesshoumaru and towards Kagome.� Rin was babbling something but the miko
hardly heard her � her attention was focused solely on the demon lord.� He didn�t even glance at her; rather, he
turned on his heel and began walking through the flower fields towards the tree
line.

Kagome was vaguely aware of Shippo
hesitantly moving towards her, and she glanced down at the kit.� He sprang upon her, landing in her arms
agilely and burying his face into her shoulder.�
She could feel the dampness of his tears seeping through her kimono and
she held the little kit tightly, crooning softly.

�Kagome,� Shippo whispered,
sounding desperate and scared and joyous all at once.� �Kagome, Kagome.�

�I�ve got you, Shippo,� she
whispered back.� He sobbed slightly at
that, rubbing his face into her shoulder.�
Her gaze drifted over to Sesshoumaru � he�d stopped at the tree line,
his back towards them.� The miko heaved a
little internal sigh; he expected her to follow him.� Well, he was just going to have to wait.

However, after only a few moments,
Shippo lifted his head and wiped his tears away.� He smiled tremulously at her, and her heart
warmed at the sight of her kit attempting to be brave for her.� No, she didn�t remember the little fox, but
already she loved him hopelessly.

He sniffled a little and then said,
very quietly, �Sesshoumaru told me you don�t remember anything?�

Kagome shook her head and replied,
�I don�t, not really.�

Shippo turned his gaze reluctantly
towards the daiyoukai.� �You sure know
how to pick �em, Kagome,� he muttered.

The young woman blinked,
surprised.� So not what she�d expected to hear.� She opened her mouth to reply, only to find
herself at a complete loss for words.�
The kitsune looked like he wanted to say more
� she could almost see his internal struggle.�
His gaze shifted between her and Sesshoumaru rapidly, and she suddenly
wondered exactly what the demon lord had said to her son.

Finally his eyes settled on
Sesshoumaru, and he sighed softly.�
Glancing back up at her, Shippo said, �I guess you better go after him.�

Kagome frowned slightly � there was
something about the way he�d said it, almost as if he was used to this
routine.� She wondered suddenly if
perhaps Inuyasha had been similar to his half-brother in this way, retreating
when he was wounded.� So much for keeping my love life hidden from
children, she thought ruefully.

The little kit rubbed his nose
against her shoulder again, and said quietly, �Don�t worry, Kagome.� I�ll be here.�� He pushed off against her then, twisting in
the air and landing agilely on his tiny feet.

Part of her was annoyed that she
actually wanted to follow Sesshoumaru,
instead of making him work a little for it.�
He�d taken off with her son, after all.�
On the other hand, she was the one who�d uttered The Word and started
this whole fiasco.� She supposed she
really ought to be the adult and say sorry first.

With an apologetic smile towards
Shippo, Kagome struck out after the daiyoukai.�

***

�Look, are you going to say
anything?� Kagome huffed, irritated.� �I
already said I was sorry.�

He didn�t even look back at her,
just continued wandering aimlessly on.�
Well, it was aimless as far as she could tell.� She figured she�d been trailing after him for
at least an hour, with no sign of stopping anytime soon.� The forest was filled with a noisy racket all
around them, her stomach was grumbling incessantly, and she was glaring daggers
at the daiyoukai�s back.� His pretty hair
swayed back and forth as he walked, almost hypnotizing, and Kagome suppressed an
irritated sigh.� She�d tried several
times to catch up to him so that she could walk next to him, but every time she
tried, he simply lengthened his stride to stay in the lead.� Passive-aggressive much? she
thought to herself.

On the other hand, she knew she had
slowed down a bit over the past ten minutes or so, which meant that he must
have slowed his pace as well.� They�d
remained at exactly the same distance apart since she first caught up to him,
an hour ago.� Kagome thought perhaps the
noises of the forest would normally soothe her � birds chirping brightly
towards each other, small animals rooting around in the underbrush � but she
was simply too on edge to appreciate the sounds of nature.� Plus she was completely, utterly, thoroughly
lost.

At least she still felt the pull
from the thing in Kohaku�s back, so she knew she�d be able to get back to the
cabin.� Not for the first time, she was
tempted to simply throw in the towel and let Sesshoumaru walk his cute buns off
on his own.� Then again, doing so would be
admitting defeat, and the thought of that annoyed her more than the demon in
front of her.

Kagome sighed, long and loud.� A Kingfisher trilled back, and she caught a
flash of blue as it took flight.� She
wasn�t tired, even though they�d been trekking along at a brisk pace for an
hour.� She was more annoyed that the
demon lord refused to acknowledge her pretty apology and, once again, her
stomach wanted to be filled.� She�d had a
good breakfast this morning, but no lunch and only a few bites of soup to hold
her.� It was now edging on towards dinner
time, and she didn�t particularly feel like tromping around this forest
anymore.

They walked along in silence, and
the young woman�s annoyance continued to grow.�
After another fifteen, maybe twenty minutes, she was steaming.� Another five minutes passed as she stomped
along angrily.� She wanted to yell at
him; she wanted to shout and rage and maybe get some sort of response out of
him as well.� In that moment, Kagome
realized that she couldn�t stand it, not at all, she hated how he was always
perfectly under control.

�It�s your own fault!� she shrieked,
her cry cutting across the racket of the forest.� She stopped walking and stomped her foot
petulantly.� He didn�t even break stride,
just continued moving as if she wasn�t there.�
Her temper flared even higher.�
She started running towards him, intent on catching up.

As soon as she hit that magical
distance of about five feet, however, the daiyoukai�s stride lengthened again,
keeping the space between them.� Kagome
wanted to scream in frustration.

�You never tell me anything!� Kagome yelled, slowing to a
walk.� �You just let me fumble
along.� I don�t even know what that word
means!�

Sesshoumaru slowed as well, but his
unbending back told her nothing, nothing.� She cast her mind back over the week and a
half of memories that she had, counting up the number of times Sesshoumaru had
actually spoken with her.� It was a
meager number, that was for sure.� He seemed unwilling to open up to her, share
his thoughts and feelings.� His speech
was usually terse, direct, slashing right to the point like a razor sharp sword.�

Then another thought occurred to
her.

Kagome stopped dead in her tracks,
the fight bleeding out of her.� Somehow,
Sesshoumaru seemed to sense the change in her for he stopped as well, though he
still did not turn.

Staring hard at the daiyoukai�s
back, she said, very quietly, �That word � it was a word for Inuyasha, wasn�t
it?�

He didn�t move, didn�t answer, but
she could almost sense the imperceptible tightening across his shoulders.� She was right, then.

�You want me to regain my memory,
don�t you, Sesshoumaru?� Kagome continued.�
�That�s why you don�t tell me anything � you think if I figure things
out on my own, I�m more likely to remember the past.�

Again he remained silent, but she
suddenly realized something else.� The
demon lord was spare with his words, but he still shared his thoughts and
feelings with her.� It was in his every
movement, his gestures, his reactions to her.� It was in his eyes when he looked at her and,
yes, even in the lines of his back when he refused to face her.� She knew exactly what he was telling her now,
and what he�d been telling her since she uttered The Word a lifetime ago.

Her eyes dropped to the forest
floor, noticing how the dead leaves surrounded her feet.� She saw the edge of her kimono sleeve out of
the corner of her eye, and she finally understood.� Her apology was meaningless; the demon lord
already knew she regretted saying The Word.�
She knew exactly what she needed to say in order to make things right
between them � after all, Sesshoumaru had told her the words himself.� Her stubborn side balked,
the words like ashes in the back of her throat.�
She couldn�t say them if she didn�t mean them, and she wasn�t sure if
she could mean them.

Another part of her reminded her of
the way he looked at her, his protective, gentle care, the heat he stirred in
her body.� That�s not enough to say the words, though, the miko thought.� On the other hand, if she couldn�t say them,
she knew she would have to return to the cabin, get Shippo, gather her clothes,
and walk out of his life forever.� This
whole thing had progressed too far for either of them to take half steps
anymore.� And while she was too
frightened to say the words, she� she couldn�t stand the thought of leaving him
either.� Not because she had no memory,
not because she would probably never see Rin again if she left.

She couldn�t bear the thought of
leaving him because� because even though the words weren�t completely true now,
they would be soon.� Perhaps
sooner than she wanted to admit.�
Which meant her only real option was to say them.

Kagome opened her mouth only to
shut it again.� Kami, what a coward I am, she thought to herself.� Now the forest was still, Sesshoumaru was
still, it seemed the whole world was still, waiting in hushed silence for her
to speak.

Eyeing the hem of her kimono
sleeve, embroidered with the same honeycomb design that marked the daiyoukai�s
clothing, Kagome said, �Sesshoumaru, I need time.� I�m still confused, I�m still afraid, I�m not
ready yet.� But��

Her voice trailed off and she
glanced up at him.� The tension across
his shoulders had increased as he waited for the words she hadn�t said
yet.� It was now or never, she realized.� Either she said them or she didn�t.� Kagome closed her eyes and spoke.

�But� Sesshoumaru, I belong� to
you.�

In an instant he was all around
her, his one clawed hand tangling in her hair, his fluffy fur wrapping around
her back, pressing her into him.� Kagome
went limp and yielding against him, her arms circling his waist, leaning
against him as if her body had been created to fit his.� Or his body had been created to fit her.

For a moment Kagome wanted to say
something else, but then she realized she didn�t have to.� It was in the way his cheek rested against
the crown of her head, the soft rumbling of contentment she could hear deep
within his chest, the way their bodies fit together.� He was telling her in his own way, and her
saying it out loud would be crass, rude even.�
Sesshoumaru belonged to her as well.

She smiled slightly and snuggled
closer to him.� She was still unsure,
still not ready, but she felt the tension drain from her as the heat of his
body warmed her.� His hand in her hair,
holding her head in just the right way, the soft fur tickling the back of her
neck; she was lost in the sensations of him.�
She snuggled closer to him, feeling the strong, hard muscles along the
plane of his back under her hands.� He
made no move to do more than hold her, and this spoke to her as well.� He was going to give her time.

She couldn�t know the demon lord�s
thoughts as his ever-wary eyes scanned the forest around them.� What she asked for was almost impossible,
though she couldn�t know that either.�
With an internal sigh, Sesshoumaru closed his eyes as well, fighting the
instinct to mark her now, letting her
presence, the bright taste of her scent in the back of his throat, the
brilliant purity of her power shimmering beneath the surface, letting everything
that Kagome was and is and would be soothe him. �

He was the most powerful creature
in all of Japan,
but even he could not stop the flow of time.�
While he remained largely unaffected by it, she would not.� His miko had recovered her strength, if not
her memory.� That meant that their enemy
had likely recovered as well.� Soon
enough there would be battle and bloodshed.

But for now, they still had
time.� For now, for now there was calm.
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