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A Matter of Trust	By : InitialA Category: InuYasha > Het - Male/Female > InuYasha/Kagome Views: 10353 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own InuYasha, nor make money from this story.

Chapter List
- 9
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A Matter of Trust
By:
TuxedoUranus89/InitialA
Disclaimer: I don�t
own InuYasha, or any other things mentioned in this story that would cost me
much money I don�t have if it was implied that I did!
Author�s Note: There�s
really nothing to say except I love the onslaught of reviews in my inbox the
morning after, and I hope you guys like this chapter! AWAAAAAAAAAAY! (also, I apologize if the formatting for this chapter is weird... I'll have to edit it at a later date, I have no idea how to fix this at the moment... I'm really sorry, I hope it's not too much of a bother!!)

Kagome stirred her lemonade
casually, watching the glittering crowd with vague interest. It startled her at
first, to see so many youkai and hanyou at once, but she was growing used to
the sight. Most startling were the giraffe-youkai, standing at least a foot
over the rest of the crowd; their necks weren�t as long as their beast
counterparts, only a few inches longer than a human�s, but their legs made up
for height. She was even getting used to the shocking pink hairstyles from the
few flamingo-youkai. She heard a cough, and turned to see Dr. Kiyomura walking
towards her. �You look bored, Kagome.� She commented, taking a seat across the
table. The raven-haired woman shrugged. �It�s not my party, and I really don�t
know anyone here.�
She looked over the doctor as she
took a sip from her glass. Her skin was darker, some shade of copper without
the concealment spell, and there was a thin white stripe on her face, from
forehead to chin, with a splash of white on her forehead. Her hair was styled to
one side, with pieces falling across her forehead and face. �I�m going to take
a guess, so don�t be offended if I get it wrong� Horse-youkai?� Dr. Kiyomura
smiled. �Very good. Most can�t guess that from my markings alone. They have to
wait until I swish the tail before cluing in.� Kagome smiled back. �There were
a lot of horses in the village InuYasha and I met in. I picked up a few things
from the farmers. So, how do you know Sesshou-maru?� She asked, changing the
subject. The other woman looked back to the crowd. �I actually don�t know the
Lord so much as the Lady. Rin and I met a few decades ago at a fundraiser my
practice was asked to sponsor. We keep in touch, meet at social functions, the
like. Her mate I�ve only spoken to a few times, very intimidating man. She won�t
hear a word against him though, insists he had the kindest heart under the icy
exterior.� Kagome too looked towards the dais where the youkai in question sat,
looking bored. �He has his moments. Rin is the result of one of them, he saved
her from death when she was a child, and practically raised her.�
Dr. Kiyomura eyed her with
interest. �I must admit, I�m curious how you and your own mate met. He said the
circumstances were odd ones.� The other woman fought the urge to sigh. �Odd
doesn�t begin to describe them� If you�ve got some time to spare, I can tell
you.� The doctor nodded agreeably, and she took them back to the very
beginning. Dr. Kiyomura was apparently an experienced audience member, gasping
or laughing in all the right places. Kagome was just finishing the details of InuYasha�s
proposal to her last fall, when she felt a tap on the shoulder. �Kagome-sama,
pardon my interruption of your story.� A woman began, and Kagome smiled. �It�s
alright, I was just finishing. Can I help you?� The woman had a mischievous glint
in her honey-colored eyes. �Don�t tell me Kagome-sama has forgotten me?� Dr.
Kiyomura stepped in. �Rin, it�s lovely to see you. Yet another successful party
to add to the scrapbooks?� She waved a hand at the glittering crowd. Rin
smiled. �Actually, InuYasha-niisan did most of the
work. Sesshy would have discovered it if I did more than hand InuYasha-niisan a list of places to cover the works.�
Rin turned her attention back to
Kagome. �So, he really did find you.� She commented with a small smile. The
other woman nodded. Rin helped her to her feet. �Well, since you and I both
know he�s being the world�s biggest prick at the moment, I�ve left him with my
mate for a few minutes. I�m afraid I must insist you need to greet Sesshy as
well, he�ll be pleased to see you.� Kagome stared in wonder. �He will?� The
smaller woman nodded cheerfully. �He did always say it was regretful you two
were separated like you were, you made InuYasha-niisan
so happy. You know coming from Sesshy that�s a big compliment.� The
raven-haired woman didn�t say anything, but followed her towards the dais.
As they were making their way
through the crowd, InuYasha and Sesshou-maru were arguing. �Goddammit,
Sesshou-maru, you know what your woman is like. If I could have gotten out of
this, you know I would have, I hate parties more than you!� The younger brother
snarled. His elder was calm; in the last few hundred years,
he�d taken up his late father�s hairstyle, the long horsetail, and strengthened
his resemblance to the late lord. �Nonetheless� I�m reassigning the American
clients to you.� InuYasha gaped. �You asshole, I already have half of Europe,
you want me to tack on the American dickheads too? Take the whole thing up with
Rin, if you�re pissed off about it, don�t dump me with more work than I can
keep up with already!� Sesshou-maru�s cool retort was
cut off by the arrival of their mates. �Sesshy, look who I found!� Rin sang out
cheerfully. Kagome stumbled up behind her, and blushed. She had been getting
more and more clumsy as of late. �Hello Sesshou-maru.�
She said quietly, bowing her head submissively.
InuYasha growled to himself, watching his mate submit to his brother while she
continued to deny him. Sesshou-maru allowed himself a moment of surprise before
regaining his usual calm. �The miko� InuYasha, I
notice you failed to mention this�� The younger brother grumbled. �Rin knew��
She looked indifferent. �I did, but it doesn�t make any difference. You should
have told him yourself.� He growled. �You�re supposed to be on my side�� She beamed. �I�m on no one�s
side. Sesshou-maru should have guessed.� Kagome had started to ebb away. Sesshou-maru�s voice stopped her. �You are with pup, miko. I confess some puzzlement.� She turned pink, matching
her dress; mostly from being singled out, but also from keeping in laughter:
Sesshou-maru was rarely found confused. �Well�� She paused, not really sure how
to explain. InuYasha snorted. �Keh. The well got sealed when she was in this
time, after we mated. The pup�s mine.� He explained shortly.
Sesshou-maru raised an eyebrow. �I
was not certain that my half-brother�s tale of this time portal in the
Bone-Eater�s Well was true.� Kagome looked up at him,
meeting his amber eyes; her heart skipped a beat at their color, forgetting
they weren�t her own mate�s. �It�s true. I used it to travel back and forth
between the Sengoku Jidai and now for three years
until it sealed itself.� She stressed the last two words and directed a glare
towards InuYasha, who ignored her. Sesshou-maru did not fail to notice the
brief expression of longing that had crossed her face, nor the fact that his
brother and the miko failed to acknowledge each other
properly. �InuYasha, I desire refreshment. Bring something for the four of us.�
He ordered. His brother glared at him. �Why the fuck should I? Snap your
fingers or something, call over a waiter.� He snapped, ignoring Rin�s indignant
gasp. Icy amber met cool violet. �If you do not wish to add the Chinese to your
growing list of clients, I suggest you do so.� He permitted himself a smirk. �It
is, after all, my birthday.�
Rin giggled outright at
the look of indignation on InuYasha�s face as he stomped away. Kagome sighed, rubbing
her back briefly. Sesshou-maru turned his attention back to her. �You�re
quarreling. And he is not allowing you to see his true form.� He stated. She pursed her lips, painted a coral pink, and glanced up at
him. �We are. You can guess he�s being stubborn.� He raised an eyebrow. �I
imagine he isn�t the only stubborn one. I wonder what it is you�re quarreling
about.� Kagome flushed. �I�m not being stubborn! If he�d just tell me what was
going on in his head, I�d-� She started, her temper flaring, but Rin set a
calming hand on her shoulder. �Kagome-sama, if everyone got so heated about InuYasha-niisan not divulging his innermost thoughts, there would be
more than just talk of global warming.� She said soothingly. �He�s like that.
And I�m sure he�ll come around soon�ah! Just as expected, here he is now. I
hope that�s the Romane Conti, niisan,
I need a bit of wine.� She said cheerfully, taking the glass from him. He
raised an eyebrow as he passed non-alcoholic beverages to both his brother and
Kagome, who looked slightly subdued. He also had a glass of fruit punch; even
the small amount of alcohol in the champagne was fuzzing
his sensitive senses, and didn�t want to risk doing anything more stupid than
usual. �I think you lied when you said you always just wanted to sample all the
expensive drinks you buy for these things.� He told her wryly. �You just want
to make up for those of us who can�t hold it.�
Rin smiled. �Of course
not, it would shame the family to no end if I was drunk out of my mind. Small
glasses to last a while, and no more.� Taking a sip of the dark wine, she
added, �Though I do admit it�s a perk to being human.� InuYasha pondered over
what he�d heard while coming back, Kagome being angry that he wasn�t telling
her what she wanted to hear, while his brother and Rin began asking questions
about the baby. He�d already decided to tell her that night, yet he still didn�t
know how to go about doing it. Especially if she used her miko
powers again�there went both theories that mating with demons or carrying a
child would weaken or destroy a miko�s powers. He
supposed he could head all attacks off by hoping she�d be too tired to resist
him after tonight, but remembering the previous night, he seriously doubted he
could rely on weariness. He was brought back when Rin poked him in the arm with
one of her nails. �Niisan, we�re talking to you!� She
chirped. He looked at them blankly. �What?�
Kagome gave a small smile
as Sesshou-maru made a noise that, in a lesser man, would have been called a
sigh. �The previously asked question pertained towards the naming of the pup.
Have you decided on anything as of yet?� InuYasha blinked in surprise. �Considering
that I just found out I was still going to have a pup a month ago, no, we haven�t
decided on names. And we haven�t discussed it either.� And if she doesn�t believe me later, we might not ever�
Sesshou-maru regarded him. �Be sure to run your chosen names by me when you
decide.� InuYasha frowned. �Why?� He was met with yet another cold amber gaze. �As
head of the family, I�m bound to state the approval of the names you choose.�
Kagome stepped in before another argument started. �I�ll make sure of it.� The elder
brother simply nodded.
Rin looked up as the
hired musicians began their set. �Oh good, they�re just on time. Come on,
Sesshy.� She cheerfully took her husband�s hand and dragged him towards the
crowd, who were pairing off with one another for the dancing portion. Kagome
suppressed a laugh as she heard him protest slightly. �Rin! This Sesshou-maru
does not�� She also heard Rin�s reply. �Oh, don�t give me that. Stop being such
a sissy.� She took a seat in a chair, grateful that they�d gone so she could
sit without feeling rude. �The great Lord of the West,
tamed and humbled by a small human woman.� She remarked softly. �Keh�� InuYasha
didn�t say any more, unsure if her speaking was a sign that he was permitted to
talk again. The pair watched the glittering crowd begin a waltz, with an
elegantly disgruntled-looking Sesshou-maru in the middle of it all with his
mate; his silver horsetail stood out amongst the other colors.
After the first several
songs were through, some of the crowd had left to the caterers and the tables.
Kagome had gone for dinner before the rush, with InuYasha trailing behind, and
was on her third plate before Rin and Sesshou-maru returned with their own
dinners. �You seem to have a healthy appetite.� The smaller woman remarked
kindly. �That�s good, signs of a healthy pup. My girls always gave me huge appetites, the servants went crazy with everything I kept
wanting.� Kagome smiled sheepishly. �I feel bad, knowing there are some who
haven�t had a meal yet.� Rin waved her hand in dismissal. �Oh, don�t worry
about it. Some of our guests can have hearty appetites, so I always warn the
caterers to have plenty of refills. If they�re that upset about it, they can
stop at a restaurant on the way home and pay for it.� Kagome laughed outright,
and finished her string beans. After a while, when the crowd had thinned again,
InuYasha stood. Without a word, he held his hand out to Kagome. She looked at
him, puzzled, but cautiously took it. Still wordless, he led her to the dance
floor; she was shocked to discover that he could waltz quite well, better than
she, who only knew the rudiments. He was silent for a few measures, then spoke softly. �I know you think I�m this huge asshole�
Just� give me the time of day later, and I�ll try to explain, alright?� She
frowned. �Why not now?� He returned the look. �Because I�m not sure you want to
get overly emotional right now. I�d rather you just save it.� When she
continued to look unhappy, he sighed, twirling her around. �Please? Just� hear
me out later.� Returning, she gripped his jacket a little harder than she�d
probably intended, tripping on her own feet slightly. He steadied her, and she
looked up at him. �Alright�� She whispered, feeling weak under his gaze. The violet
hue shimmered, flickering to amber briefly as he fingered the ring, spinning it
slightly. She bit her lip, and had to look away, her grip tightening on his
coat. Smirking slightly, he loosened her grip, and began the waltz again.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
It was very late when
they returned. Kagome was unable to walk once they reached his building, but he
had no qualms about carrying her into the apartment. Shippou and Itazura had
returned earlier, he could hear the slow, even breathing of sleep from their
room, but as Sesshou-maru�s brother, he�d been almost
required to stay until the end. What made things better about carrying her was
that he could easily keep hold of her until they were safely shut into his
bedroom. Inside, she squeaked a tired protest as he set her on the bed, which
was now covered in many more pillows than he�d originally owned; he�d stopped
at a department store to get more, as Dr. Kiyomura had suggested. �Alright.� He
started, sighing mentally. �Don�t interrupt me when I start, because this is
more difficult than it looks like. You of all people should know that. If you
feel the need to start throwing things at me, or yelling, or purify me, wait
until I�m done, or you�ll never get a satisfactory answer from me, alright?�
She nodded, her eyes
tired but watching him intently. �You asked if I cared at all, or if I did or
didn�t want you back.� He gritted his teeth. �You don�t know how much that
kills me, hearing you ask those things� I�ve wanted you back every single day
you�ve been gone. I cared so much my heart broke several times over. I don�t
know how long it was, months or maybe even years, I felt like I couldn�t
breathe because you weren�t there, my one shot at being loved and cared for and
having a family for the rest of my life was gone. Yeah, I helped with Miroku
and Sango�s family, but it wasn�t the same� Always �Uncle InuYasha�, never �Father�
or �Papa�. After a while� I don�t know, something hardened
again, making me turn away. I still wanted you, but I knew you couldn�t be with
me, so I tried to bury it. When things started to become familiar again, I got
scared. Yes, I know, me being scared� who�d�ve
thought? I got scared that I�d see you and reopen all that hurt and learn
things I was too fucking scared of to find out for myself. Like why the well
closed. Did you do it on purpose or was it an accident? The others always said
it was an accident, but I was never sure�
�Remember that morning?
Before you left, your scent had changed slightly. I knew immediately what it
was, and I told you we were going to have a pup together. You cried, I
remember, and I freaked out, but you said they were happy tears and just held
me until it stopped� I remember thinking how happy we were going to be� and
then the well closed. After a while, I thought maybe� maybe those weren�t tears
of happiness. Maybe you were realizing that your fate was sealed to me now, and
wanted to stay away, leave me, or you had second thoughts� I didn�t know if you
hated me for this, when we really hadn�t talked about it or anything� Then,
later on, I learned about abortions, when they started to become popular with
the prostitutes and the geisha in the cities. That scared me more, to think
that you�d sealed yourself from me and then destroyed what we�d made�� He
paused here, and was furious with himself when he realized he had tears in his
eyes. He swiped at them, and took a breath to calm himself. He couldn�t look at
her, hadn�t since he�d started. He knew he had to finish though.
�There was so much I didn�t
know, didn�t know if I even wanted to know� If you�d died in childbirth� or if you�d lost the
pup, or if you�d given it away� I was even more scared to find out if you�d
kept the pup, because that would open a new series of questions and problems of
what to do, like now. You have no idea how fucking confused I am day in and day
out because I have no idea what the fuck I�m doing. You seem so fucking calm
about these things like mood swings and those weird-ass cravings you get; hell,
even those doctor�s appointments and that weird class we went to. I have no
idea what the fuck I�m doing, and I�m even more scared that I won�t know what
to do after the pup is born, or if I�ll be a good father, or if you still might
end up hating me for something� I barely handled losing you once, I don�t know
if I could do it again now that I�ve found you�� He didn�t bother wiping away
his tears now, and tried taking another calming breath. �I�m� I�m sorry� Sorry
I was too damn scared to find out the truth� for thinking it�d be easier to
handle the grief than the pain or the joys of the truth� For thinking it was
simply easier to hate myself for driving you away��
Her voice sounded
far-away, soft. �Why did you say you couldn�t trust me, that day we first met
again?� He sighed, holding his head in his hands. �I don�t know� After all I�ve
just said, you have to believe me when I say there was
so much going through my mind I barely remember what I said that day�� He
thought about it for a few minutes. �Maybe� maybe it�s more that I couldn�t
trust� myself� or your reactions to be what I hoped them to be� or that things
would be how I prayed they might� That day, I still didn�t know what was going
to happen when the pup was going to be born� what you had planned to do� maybe
you�d meant the comment about single motherhood as just being the carrying
vessel for adoptive parents you�d found or something, fuck, I don�t know� I
regret saying it though, I�ve come to realize that
even after all this time apart, of wondering if you�d left me for some reason,
I still trust you more than anyone else in my life. And I hope� you can forgive
me somehow� for all this shit, and being too goddamn
scared to do anything about it��
She didn�t say anything.
She didn�t need to. The tears falling from her eyes were just as thick and fast
as his own, as she sat up and kissed him. It wasn�t as passionate as their kiss
several days before, yet it fanned up a small flame inside each of them that
had been shining dimply for ages. The flame did no more than break the ice that
had rested between them for the past twenty-four hours, but it was enough as
they lay next to each other on the mound of pillows, too exhausted to change
out of their fancy clothes, and held one another as they drifted off to sleep.

((Raaaaaaaaaawr, emotional dramaaaaaaaaaa! Whoo! Alright, I
deeply apologize for the lack of reviewer responses this time, but it�s 1:30am, I have to be up in seven hours for classes, and
I PROMISE I�LL WRITE LOTS OF RESPONSES NEXT TIME!! No, this story isn�t over
just yet, I did promise you lemons right? Oh, was that a hint? =D Not just yet,
but soon!! I�m having too much fun with this one to quit just yet, tee hee. I hope you like the chapter, and please leave a
review!!!))
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A Matter of Trust

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