Nikanaru | By : Koday Category: InuYasha > General Views: 3209 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0 |
Disclaimer: I do not own InuYasha, nor make money from this story. |
Previous Chapter Illustration
www.deviantart.com/view/32144864/
I don’t think this really requires any explanation.
Didn’t have a whole lot of time to work on this, so just rattled
it off and photoshopped it up some.
I actually think it came out surprisingly well.
Nikanaru
Chapter 12
Obtaining A Sense of Direction
Or
Insert Witty Alternative Title Here
Two Days Ago
Slowly, but
with a certainty that was absolute, the crackling fire died… and she watched in
envy. Remaining traces of red along the charred sticks of wood sizzled away
until a last puff of smoke indicated that the fire’s life had effectively
ended.
That was
how it was supposed to be… a fledgling spark would struggle until it blossomed
a full-fledged fire. And that fire would burn brightly. It would burn with
intensity. It would burn with passion. Its flames would live fully, dancing and
blazing majestically in the breeze for as long as it could. Eventually, the
wood beneath it would burn away, and the fire would degrade into but a few
embers, glowing weaker and weaker until it passed away.
That was
how it was supposed to be.
But she was
not the fledging spark, filled with the potential for great things. She was not
the lively flame, burning with pride and glory. She… she was the perpetual
ember. She was the smoldering remains of what had once been, or of what could
have been. Like the ember, she felt as if a fragile, pathetic and disheveled
wretch. Now useless, all that remained for the ember, and for her, was to
patiently await for death to take them.
Those
tired, sorrowful eyes looked on with passive jealousy at the fire’s embers as
they died. Unlike her, this ember had the privilege of dying with dignity.
Unlike her,
it had the privilege of dying at all.
It was the
only vice she permitted for herself. She didn’t need the fire to stay warm, for
the coldness couldn’t kill her. She didn’t need it to cook food, for she no
longer had to eat to survive. She didn’t need it for light, as her life and
very soul was smoldered in bleak darkness. But every day, in the waning evening
light, her cold hands would build a small fire for no other reason than to sit
back and watch it burn away. The sight was like a double-edged sword, as it
gave her the pleasure of witnessing the natural cycle of life, and
simultaneously tortured her, as it served as a reminder that it was something
that she could never have.
It served
as a reminder of all the reasons why she’d ended up this way. She’d sit there,
watching with eyes deceitfully emotionless as painful memories washed over her.
It was a reminder that, though she’d been forcibly lead down this road at first
and could conceivably blame others for that much, the selfish decision to
continue down it had been hers and hers alone. The blame was nobody else’s but
her own. The true shame, however, lied with knowing that the consequences and
the sorrows of her actions weren’t also hers and hers alone.
Yet, she
still didn’t dare any suicidal endeavors. She’d already learned the hard way
that rash decisions can lead to consequences that you could never live with.
And she knew the consequences of what would happen if she were to die were
unacceptable… no matter how much she deserved death, or how much she craved the
release of it. She would die eventually, yes… her cold shell of a body would
linger on for decades, perhaps even centuries. At some point, the clay material
that made her physical self be would degenerate; crumble and she’d simply cease
to exist, as her soul would return to where it belonged. But she had no choice
but to delay that for as long as she could, no matter her own suffering.
Her life…
no, rather her “soul” was now tied to a malfeasance that imperiled life as we
know it. Her death would mean its unleashing upon the world. All she could do,
then, was delay the inevitable as long as she could… if only for the sake of
rest of the world. That was the last, the only good she could still do. It was
a pathetic gift, but then, she was a pathetic person. It was therefore only
appropriate that her gift was given by means of her own suffering.
And so
she’d watch the fire, resigning herself to her own uttermost remorse; Alone,
here in this lifeless part of the forest. This was how thing were. This is how
it was, every day.
Every day…
Every day…
Every day…
Every day…
…But not
today.
*********
Present
“EEYYYAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!”
Scared very
nearly shitless, Max Higurashi seemed almost as if a cat from the catlike way
he very suddenly sprang backwards in alarm. Mind you, not catlike terms of the
grace and finesse generally associated with felines, but more so in terms of
the vocal pitch and the high-strung panic.
“AAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!”
From his
squatting position before the not-so-dead-anymore woman, Max had planted the
heels of his sneakers semi-firmly in the moist ground beneath them, trying to
simultaneously jump back into a standing position and back away as fast as
possible. Despite being the proud owner of a big, fluffy tail, his balance went
all over the place and his ass ended up squarely on the ground. As such, he
settled for performing a reverse crawl away from the woman.
“AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!!”
That
scream, meanwhile, belonged to Al. In her own shock, she’d leapt back a few
feet. While Max was clumsily crawling away, she grabbed a nearby thick branch,
ready to wield it as a blunt object if need be.
Holy
FUCKING Republic of Ecuador, how the hell did I NOT see that coming?! I’ve seen
ever horror and slasher flick in existence, and this set-up had every scary
movie cliché written all over it! Christ!
When he’d
backed up and stubbed his elbow on a rock, the brief wince of pain gave Max
enough pause to realize that no one else was moving, and thus the need for wild
panic was nonexistent. Al was a few feet behind him looking ready to either
bolt or swing that piece of wood at the slightest provocation. And the woman…
had not budged an inch. Still she laid there in the grass, her head turned
slightly off to the side, observing the little scene with emotionless eyes.
Several seconds passed with the three of them simply staring at each other… Max
and Al were naturally astonished, while the woman appeared… bored.
No one said
anything. No one did anything. In Al and Max’s case, this was due principally
because they were so absolutely stunned by this development that their minds
both drew complete blanks. What, precisely, is the standard operating procedure
when whisked away to the middle of nowhere after a fight with a monster, and
then being presented with a body that seemed dead five seconds ago before it
suddenly came back to life?
She was
dead! Max kept
repeating in his mind. She was dead! She didn’t have a pulse, she wasn’t
breathing, and her skin was…cold! I mean, really, unhealthily cold! What the
hell is all this?!
When enough
time had passed that the woman apparently tired of laying there staring, she
closed her eyes again and rose to her feet with a slow but consistent speed.
Slow, perhaps, because she didn’t want to make any sudden movements that could
alarm her clearly affrighted “guests”. However, her pace also suggested that
she had all the time in the world… she wasn’t having any trouble getting up,
but it seemed that she was doing it at a meticulously slow pace, as if a habit.
When finally she’d arisen to full height, her eyes reopened, once again staring
emotionlessly at the two. More time passed, her debilitated eyes staring into
their wide ones as silence again perforated the area.
Eventually,
her hand moved again, only to reposition her robe from where it had been before
the invasion of Max’s hand.
“I asked
you a question.” She impassively repeated, annoyance or anger only barely
evident in her tone. “Did you find what you were looking for?” Unbelieving at
being addressed by something he was fairly certain was a zombie, Max glanced
behind at Al, her expression equally godsmacked as his must have been.
Okay…okay…
obviously, she’s not dead. I mean, she’s up, she’s talking… she’s doing all
sorts of things dead people can’t do… well, besides being really scary.
“Uh…” Max
eventually managed to wheeze out of his hyperventilating lungs. Despite his
complete and utter confusion, he forced himself to speak. “…gee, I’m… I’m
sorry…” Gathering what dignity he could, he pulled himself up. Looking back, Al
was still a slight distance behind him. Instinctually, Max was making sure that
he was positioned in between Al and this mysterious other woman. While prepared
for ugliness, considering the situation, common sense dictated that he should
try to be diplomatic and not start shit. “…see I… uh, that is, we thought…”
With a pause, he cleared his throat and let the absurd-sounding explanation
leave his mouth. “…we thought you were dead.”
Her
expression didn’t change. Still she simply stared at the both of them with an
emotionally acquiescent gaze. Max patiently awaited an answer while
darting his eyes back between her and Al.
“Dead?” She at last spoke… spoken calmly, gently and
yet…“No… I am not quite that fortunate.” …There was a definite edge to it.
Something in the underlying tones that was unsettlingly pained.
Jesus… this is several flavours of creepy.
“You…” From behind, Al had finally found her voice, though
it was a shaky as her trembling hands. “…no, you… you can’t be…. You were dead.
I saw you…you weren’t b-breathing. You can’t be alive!”
“Yet, here I stand.” She stated as though the fact that she
wasn’t actually depressed her.
“But…” Al appeared frighteningly insistent on what her
point. “You weren’t breathing! And … for God’s sakes, you haven’t moved for
over a day!” These facts as she stated them coupled with what she was
witnessing at this moment were causing some error message in her mind that read
something along the lines of Does Not Compute.
“…And?” The woman bitterly replied, now showing clear signs
of irritation. “Do you mean to argue that I am not permitted to rise and speak
like this? Am I not in compliance with nature’s laws? Should I therefore lay
back down and remain motionless so to satisfy your narrow little perceptions of
life and death?” As any modern-day person dropped into this scenario would
likely be, Al had absolutely no answer to that. This was too much. This was all
too Goddamned much.
Sensing the beginnings of hostility, Max protectively moved
closer to Al. “Okay…All right,
so clearly, we, ah, made an error in judgment here.” Max offered, trying to
appease this scary lady. “So…again, we’re sorry. You are not dead.” He turned
to Al, and repeated, “She’s not dead, okay?” to her, as if to make that clear
to all involved.
“Again, you
are presumptuous.” The woman muttered. “Mortality and existence… how pedestrian
your shallow views are.” Her head lowered alongside her brow, nighttime shadows
forming oblique patterns across the light wrinkles along her face. It all made
for an extremely unsettling image.
“…Ooooooookie-dokey.”
Max was now subconsciously backing away, very slowly. “So, um, anyways…” He tried
a few forced laughs to try and liven the situation. “…my, heh, see my friend
and I here are a little, uh… well, lost.” He left another pause to let that
sink in. “So, seeing as how you’re not dead, and let me just say how happy I am
for you that you’re not, I don’t suppose you could… maybe give us some
directions?”
“Perhaps…”
Her oddly formal way of speaking managed to further alienate her from them.
“…that all depends on where your destination lies.”
“Uh… well,
T-Tokyo.” It was a simple word, but it was amazing that Max was unnerved enough
to make its mere pronunciation a challenge.
“Tokyo.”
She echoed slowly. “This name… it is unfamiliar to me.”
“Wh-
pardon??”
“I said
that I do not know of this place.” Now that was just absurd. An incredulous look
painted Max’s face, his mouth slightly gaping. Al, braving a step foreword,
spoke exactly what Max was thinking.
“Excuse
me…um, ma’am, but are you not Japanese??” The woman scowled slightly at the
question.
“I hardly
view either others or myself within foolish ethnic or territorial boundaries.”
She stated flatly. “But if you mean to say that Japan is where I was born and
spent most of my life, then yes.”
“Okay…” Al
continued with enough gusto that showed clearly that she was over her fear.
“So, you’re Japanese, and you claim to have never heard of Tokyo.” The
statement could not be made without a slight tone of mockery to it. “Look, not
to be… rude or anything, but you actually expect anyone to buy that?”
“I do not
expect you to ‘buy’ anything, as I ‘sell’ nothing.” Max and Al exchanged
frowns. It was a bit strange how they themselves weren’t so sure of each other
just a few minutes ago, but the appearance of this enigmatic woman quickly
cemented their camaraderie, if only out of a mutual fright.
All
right, big, giant “fuck this”. We’re getting away from here before she gets a
chance to dump us in a hole and force us to put lotion on our skin. Max resolutely backed away, an arm
snaking around Al’s wrist as he dragged her with him.
“Right-o.
Well, tell you what; we’re real sorry for bothering you. So we’ll just be on
our way then.” Oddly enough, despite her unwelcoming comportment, when Max
began retreating, here eyes twitched for a split second as she sighed she bowed
her head to him.
“I
apologize.” Despite the rotten feeling in his gut, Max paused.
“What?”
“I am…
unused to the company of others.” She humbly explained. “As you might imagine,
it is extraordinarily rare that I entertain guests.” She motioned over to her
little shack to exemplify her point. “I have no food in my home, but there is a
stream nearby that you can drink from. It should sustain you until a more
adequate meal can be garnered.”
The sudden
bit of hospitality from the woman put both Max and Al off balance, both of them
again exchanging dubious glances.
“Yeah…thanks,
but we’re not…” Al would have tried to formally deny her hunger, but in the
spirit of horrible timing and poetic justice, her stomach chose that moment to
groan very loudly. Max regarded her with concern… he himself was pretty hungry,
and he still had no idea what he was going to do about it. He’d already
promised to take care of Al, but had no idea how he was going to do that. He
had little knowledge of foraging for food in the wild, and had never hunted
anything in his life. In fact, his entire education on the subject of getting
food was limited to kitchens, cafeterias and vending machines. He didn’t want
Al to starve, but wasn’t sure what he could do to prevent it.
But on the
other hand, should they entrust that responsibility to this… very, very bizarre
woman, who appeared to them under very, VERY bizarre circumstances?
“I can
understand your skepticism.” She spoke again. “But know that I bear no ill will
towards you… in spite of your… invasion into my robe.” No small amount of red
colored Max’s cheeks.
“I… Hey!
Woah, no!” He stammered, waving his hands defensively. “Again, I thought you
were dead!”
“So you
believe stumbling on a cadaver is a perfectly acceptable reason for
molestation, then?” The fact that she sounded so serious also made it just a
bit deadpan.
“Jesus, I
was just trying to see if you had anything useful on you!!” Max flutteringly
shouted back.
Good God, no matter how lost I am, I will never
be desperate enough to cop a feel off a dead chick! Granted, that would be more
action than I’ve ever had, but still…
“Very
well.” She accepted that explanation. “Then there is no reason for any
animosity between us.”
“Uh…”
“Please…”
She bowed again. “If I seem embittered, it is only because my years have seen
many pointless deaths and sorrow. I have no desire to again see it in the form
of two young people needlessly starving to death. Permit me to help you. I will
also see if I can be of any assistance in your locating your destination.”
Max sighed
in annoyance. He hated this. He hated the confusion. He hated not knowing what
to do or what to expect. He had absolutely no sense of a direction as to where
he should go. The scents carried by the wind made it clear that they were a
least miles from any city, town, or sign of human civilization, which seemed
impossible. He couldn’t just run around and hope to stumble on a restaurant
before either he or Al passed out from hunger.
The only
direction being offered to him right now was in the form of this woman, leery
of her as he was. The encounter with Naraku earlier had perhaps rendered him
paranoid of the unknown. While her behavior was… off, to say the least, she did
seem sincere enough about having no interest in harming them. It was… it was
something, at least, which was nowhere else right now.
“Okay.” He
cautiously replied. That earned him a surprised look from Al.
“Max, are
you out…?”
“Look,
we’ll just get some water for now.” He assured her. “Some water from a stream.
Which we’ll see for ourselves has no drugs or anything weird in it.” He leaned
in closer and whispered. “And we’ll just talk to her for now, okay? It’s not
like we have anything better to go on right now.”
“But she… I
swear to God, she was dead!”
“Hey, I
thought so, too. But, as you can see, she ain’t.”
“Well, have
you considered that she could be some sort of freakish Ax Murderer??”
“I’ve
considered that she could be anything from an Ax Murderer to a Toothpick Murderer.”
He sighed. “Look, I’ll keep an eye on her. And if it looks like she’s going to
try anything, I’ll take her down, all right? But unless you’ve got a better
idea, let’s at least figure out where the hell we are.” Al looked back between
him and the woman, not liking this a single bit. But she did understand the
need to get some sense of direction… and to at least put something in their
stomachs. Biting her lip, she hesitantly nodded.
“Okay.” Max
agreed. “Just stay behind me.” Turning away from Al, he readdressed to woman.
“All right, ma’am. We’ll, uh, gratefully take you up on that offer.”
“Good.” She
said simply as she turned around and began heading from the clearing into the
forest. “It is a short walk this way.” With a deep breath, and wavering
slightly at first, Al and Max made to follow her.
Jim
Dandy. Just Jim absolute fucking Dandy. I’m walking off in the middle of a dark
night into some creepy woods with a creepy woman, unarmed and uninsured. Brave front or not, Max was sick
with anxiety over what he could be getting them into. He missed home. He REALLY
missed home. Back in Tokyo, where he could safely walk up to total strangers
and ask for the time, directions, or when the next bus was without a crippling
apprehension of death.
Well,
you know… He
wondered to himself. Maybe that’s it. Maybe I’m being too paranoid. Try just
being… y’know, yourself. Friendly. I mean, she’ll have less of a reason to kill
you if you’re polite to her…maybe. Eh, it’s worth a shot, anyways.
“So uh…hey.” Max began as they penetrated
into the foliage of the woods. “We didn’t actually formally introduce
ourselves, did we?” The woman paused, looking back at him in silence. “Uh, so…
Hi. I’m Max.” He said with a smile and a bow. “Max Higurashi. And, ah, this
here is my good friend, Al.”
“ALEX.” She
snapped at him. Although she’d put up with that stupid name he had for her, she
instinctually reacted whenever he’d try to spread the damn thing around.
Sighing, she faced the woman and, despite not wanting to volunteer her name to
a total stranger, bowed. “Alexandria Tanaka.”
“A
pleasure.” The woman spoke in that same cold voice. She followed this up with a
bow of her own.
“Kikyo.”
She informed simply before turning around and continuing onward.
*********
Two Days Ago
Like an
atrophied muscle that groaned in shock after not having been used in so long,
Kikyo’s spiritual senses lit ablaze, not unlike the very fire she’d been
watching. Her eyes widened slightly in what meant a small gesture for many, yet
a monumental achievement for her. Her legs brought her up with a speed she
hadn’t used in nearly two decades.
Something,
something very big had just penetrated the fabric of time and space itself. Her
senses spreading out across the spiritual plane as far as they could be stretched,
she paced around her shack of a home like an antennae seeking clear reception.
Whatever was causing this sensation was gargantuan in power, but it was
difficult to determine the precise nature of it.
Focus.
Focus.
Focus.
Yes.
Kikyo was
able to recognize two things. The first was that the nature of this disturbance
was dimensional; something that was crossing over from one plane of existence
to another. She’d seen this, sensed this many times before in the past, having
occasionally observed her reincarnate do so. But this was grotesquely
different. This wasn’t a “clean” crossing, like the kind that girl had done.
When her reincarnation had transcended space and time, she’d gone through a
clear, woven passageway between the two worlds. Whatever presence this was, on
the other hand, it was crashing though the walls of time and space like a
person who’d smash though a wall rather than go through a door. For those who
were familiar with the nature of dimensional rifts, such a thing was believed impossible.
However,
the second, and the foremost thing she recognized made clear why what she was
sensing was plausible…
Shikon.
There was
no mistaking it. Kikyo couldn’t possibly confuse that particular energy
signature with any other. It wasn’t in the same jewel form she’d always known
it to be, but the presence was unquestionably that of a being connected to the
Four Souls. It was barraging through the dimensional boundaries like a raging
bull, sending torrential waves of distorted aura crashing across. Though the
physical location of the actual disturbance was several hundred, possibly
thousand miles away, it was powerful enough to cause ghostly waves to thrash
from so far away.
Dear Gods,
it was him! This was that child!
Kikyo found
herself uncharacteristically stunned. Long before she’d surrendered herself to
a hermit’s life, she’d investigated every possible circumstance she could
imagine under which Naraku could be further empowered… or, alternatively,
defeated. The presence of the little demon infant who had escaped this world
all those years ago was a huge factor in determining those possible outcomes.
Yet, the portal… the well… the “clean” passageway that the child had been sent
through was no more. For over a year, Kikyo had sought out the existence of any
other such portals that could connect this world to the one Nikanaru been sent
to. It was only when she’d assured herself that no such other portals existed
that she satisfied herself to a life of isolation.
Yet, now, there he was. Unquestionably him,
now jammed in the delicate aural walls between the two worlds. He’d broken one
wall on his side, but now he was just… sitting there. Unmoving, though his mere
presence continued sending ricocheting torrents across the spiritual
boundaries. She hadn’t anticipated this. In all her years of reflection upon
everything that had happened, she’d never envisioned that something like this
occurring.
And now,
Kikyo was faced with the decision of what to do about it.
Was he
infested?? No… there was no sign of Naraku’s presence alongside his, despite
the things she’d heard. There was…something else with him, though. A much
smaller, but noticeable presence. Nothing particular. Nothing alarming.
So… now
what could be done? Though her own miko powers were great and she could extend
some measure of influence over the dimensional and spiritual plane, she
couldn’t outright push him back to wherever he’d come from. She wasn’t that
strong. It was possible, however, that she could use her influence to reach out
and pull him the rest of the way through.
The
question was… would that be wise?? Having him here could completely change
everything… what was indeterminable was if it would be for better or for worse.
In the past, most of the important decisions she’d made, both concerning
herself and others, had backfired in the worst possible ways. Her decision to
live… her decision to die… her decision to live again… her decision to seek
revenge…
Although
there were many unknown elements involved in this choice, she did know one
thing for certain: Someone… quite likely Naraku, would eventually sense him as
well, if he hadn’t already, and would attempt to take advantage of this. For
Naraku to repossess a power like this was beyond unacceptable. Such a thing had
to be prevented at all cost.
But… what
right did she have? What right did she have to once again try and take other
people lives into her own hands? So often before, at times when she believed
herself a proud, virtuous combatant for good, she’d foolishly convinced herself
that the things she did, she did because they were simply right. She’d choose a
path, a dangerous one, but would always convince herself that it was either for
the greater good, or simply justified. In those days, she’d viewed good and
evil in terms of black and white, and her lack of foresight had cost herself
and many others dearly. Even when she was so sure of herself, just as sure as
she was now, in the end, all she’d done was foster circumstances under which
pain and suffering thrived.
But within
these layers of self-doubt and regret laid a thought that had the audacity to
form. A thought that dared… DARED to suggest that having Nikanaru here could
be… could be used for… good?
Good. Yes.
Strange, how the mere apparition of hope so suddenly brought about all these
emotions and simple-minded beliefs she long swore off as dangerous.
But… how
long had she sat here, awaiting patiently for end of the world? How long had
she sat here, drowning in her own uselessness and self-loathing? Here now, was
a chance. A real chance to change things. A real chance to make things right
again. With the power of that this young demon possessed… she could… she could…
No. No,
that was insane. It was selfish, even. It would be yet another foolish decision
on her part. She’d…
She’d what?
Make things even worse? How could she possibly do that? Already, the world was
doomed. The difference Nikanaru would make was, worst-case scenario, advancing
the coming of hell by several years. And the best-case scenario was…
…preventing
it altogether.
Yes. Maybe…
just maybe this could work.
Maybe… just
maybe she could still do something right before she crumbled into dust.
And what’s
more was the obvious danger in leaving Nikanaru where he was. If she couldn’t
send him back, then the only option she’d had left was to grab him and pull him
through to herself before Naraku could attempt the same thing.
With
determination fiercer than anything she’s shown in a long time, Kikyo’s eyes
shut as she fully concentrated her holy powers. Spreading her spiritual arms
across the aural divide, her soul reached and reached through the distorted
waves crashing about. Even trained, experienced and naturally talented as she
was, it took everything she had to try and get close, focus in on her target
and properly latch onto him.
If anyone
had been watching, it would have been a bizarre sight to see this woman simply
standing there behind her little hut… motionless, eyes closed and without any
respiration, appearing perfectly at ease. Yet her mind and her soul underwent a
terrible ordeal to find her target.
Though the
process had left her spiritually exhausted, she at last managed to lock her presence
onto his. Without taking a moment to recover her strength, she pulled… and
pulled… and pulled, trying to dip his floating being to the other side. Now
that he was already there, it wouldn’t be near as hard to pull him out as it
must have been for him to break into there. But it was still a Herculean task.
For any lesser priestess, this kind of feat would have been out of the
question. For her, it was only near-impossible.
But she
nevertheless succeeded. When nearly the last of her spiritual reserves had
emptied, the presence was at last falling toward her. It moved slowly at first,
but eventually gained momentum until she felt it coming crashing towards her.
When she
finally let go, she only had enough willpower left to hear the telltale
screaming sound and a heavy set of thumps coming from the other side of
the hut before she herself passed out.
In her
dreams, she would pray to whatever Gods she might still be in good graces with
that she had not just made another horrible mistake.
End
Chapter 12
*********
A/N: I
imagine the introduction of Kikyo into this story will yield some mixed
reactions among readers. I know she’s very controversial amongst the fan
community, but please, no one freak out just yet.
See,
even though she’s an important character in the actual series, I’ve personally
felt that she’s never been really explored as a character. That, in turn,
leaves her wide open to interpretation for weirdo authors such as myself. Like
Max and Al, I’ve got plans for her. Big, fat, creepy plans, that I think
you might just like.
Or not.
Koday
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