Adult-FanFiction.org : Inuyasha / Yashahime

Heart of Pain, Heart of Ice	By : Strawberries Category: InuYasha > Het - Male/Female > Sessh?maru/Rin > Sessh?maru/Rin Views: 18872 -:- Recommendations : 2 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own InuYasha, nor make money from this story.

Chapter List
- 15
- 16
Disclaimer: I do not own InuYasha or any of the characters in the show
InuYasha. They are the wonderful creation of Rumiko Takahashi and I make no
money off of writing this what so ever.

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chapter 16: The end? heh, nah sequel coming up

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InuYasha gripped Rin's body, molding her small form against him. It was an
instinctive response, an urge to protect, to guard the female in his arms.
He silently stared up at his brother, deeply hoping Sesshoumaru would not
descend and scare the girl. Fortunately, she still had her nose buried in
his shirt and had not looked up.

That familiar almost unreadable expression gazed back in cold retaliation.
InuYasha had no idea what was going through Sesshoumaru's mind, and honestly,
he didn't really care.

The girl in his arms whispered a low whimper and shivered. Averting his
stare away from his brother, InuYasha glanced down at the small female in
his arms before walking back to the hospital.

-----------------------------------------

InuYasha carefully carried Rin into her room. As he moved toward the bed,
she raised her head up weakly. With gentle movements, he laid her down. One
arm still wrapped around the teddy bear, she settled into the covers.
He remained at the bedside, watching the girl who despondently gazed at
the blue blanket, not wanting to leave her. "Do you...need anything?"

Brown eyes darted up to him for only a second before falling back to gaze at
the spot on the blue blanket. "I... Can I have...some water?"

InuYasha sighed with an inward smile. "Sure." He poured some water from a
pitcher into a large clear plastic cup and handed it out to her.

She looked at the offered cup for a moment, placed the teddy bear she was
holding at her side, then accepted the cup from his hand. After drinking,
she handed it back to him with a mumbled thank you.

While placing the plastic cup back on the sink counter, he heard a light
rumble. Somewhat nervous, he asked quietly, "Do you need anything else?"

She shook her head.

InuYasha knew she was hungry. He could tell by the way her stomach protested
with the gurgle of water. Hoping to sway her answer, he stepped closer.
"Are you hungry?"

She glanced at him warily from the corner of her eye, edging and leaning
away from him until she heard his question and paused. "I..."

InuYasha waited patiently as those brown eyes glazed over in weary
contemplation. When she did not continue, he spoke again. "The hospital
cafeteria is always open. I can have them bring you something."

After a few moments, she finally gave a slow nod, her words barely above
a whisper. "I...I would like something to eat, please."

Silently thankful of his victory, InuYasha reached for the phone. While he
was dialing the number for the cafeteria, the night nurse walked in. He
turned with the phone at his ear when he heard the nurse let out a low gasp
under her breath. The nurse hurried to the bedside and began fretting over
Rin's arm where the IV needle had been. Rin, ignoring the nurse, was looking
at the window blinds on the other side of the wall.

InuYasha talked on the phone while he watched the nurse reinsert
the IV needle, mentally taking note of Rin's furrowed wince. He hung up
the phone just as the nurse was leaving and sat down on the chair by the bed.

All was quiet for several minutes until he heard her whispered words.

"Thank you."

"For what?"

"Teddy. You got Teddy for me. I remember...."

InuYasha looked down at the floor. He felt a little uncomfortable. "Your welcome."

The silence came again. This time it lasted until an orderly walked in
with a tray and set it down on the sliding table. The young male smiled
at him and Rin then left.

----------------------------------------------

The girl watched him push the table with the tray over her lap and remove
the lid. He himself smelled what it was before Rin got an eyeful. And
indeed her eyes were studying the meal intently. Her stomach rumbled again,
but she did not make a move to pick up the fork. Trying to understand why
she was not eating, InuYasha discretely inhaled, searching her base scent
for clues. There were many emotions but one clear scent hung in the air
around her: Fear. Not an outright paniced fear, but a deeply clinging
smell of painful worry. He guessed she was scared to eat the food. The
only reason he could determine why was that she might think she would
owe someone for it. InuYasha was apprehensive about trying to persuade
her to eat, but he had to give it a shot. He sat down and crossed his
arms on the side of the bed. Resting his chin on his forearms, he gazed
up with his best puppy dog eyes. "You will feel better if you eat, Rin.
It does smell good. Doesn't it?"

She looked at him for a moment before giving him a slow nod.

He smiled softly. "Then why don't you? Are you afraid to eat it?"
InuYasha knew the questions were a risky venture but he had to chance it
and reach out with hope that she did not regress.

Her form went rigid at the question but she did not turn away. Instead,
she licked her lips in worried fashion while slowly glancing from him to the
food. That brown gaze fell to the blanket, lingering in a tremble. Finally,
the slight tremble subsided and she let out a sigh, seemingly one of
surrender, the defeated breath forming timid words. "Outside...what
you said...about not paying for anything."

"Yes?"

She paused then spoke again, the shy quiver in her tone becoming more
noticable with each breath. "Is...Did you mean it? I will not owe...
anyone...anything...for staying here?"

He nodded, sliding his chin across his forearm in the process.
"Yes. I meant it. You don't have to pay for the hospital or the food.
You don't owe anyone here a thing. It's all taken care of."

Her features furrowed some in puzzlement. "You said...outside...someone else.
Who....?"

When her words trailed off, he answered her unfinished question. "Yes,
someone else is paying for your stay here. It is a gift. He does not want
you to pay it back. You will not owe him anything."

Again, her expession displayed confusion. "He? Who is he?"

He was unprepared for this question. It was one, that if answered, might
call for a detailed explaination. How would she react if he explained who
it was that was helping her? He decided, for now, he would have to dance
around the subject with a little tact. Maybe he could mention a few things
now, and explain everything in more detail later, when the time came to
tell her about the mark and the bond. "The person who is helping you is
my brother. Me and him want to take care of you from now on."

Rin's eyes lightened with a passing ghost of hope. "Take care of me? Why?"

"Because...." InuYasha paused. The reason Sesshoumaru wanted and needed
to take care of Rin might be too much for the girl to handle at this point.
"....I can't tell you that yet, Rin, but I want you to know we will never
harm you in any way. I promise."

For a moment she stared dazedly at the blanket then looked at him with a
soft, dark brown gaze. In her eyes he saw the beginning of hope along with
a hint of trust even though her smile had yet to surface and reflect those
feelings.

She turned her attention to the food, picked up the fork and started eating.
InuYasha, still resting his chin on his forearms, watched Rin slowly chew her
food. She seemed to have accepted his presence at the moment and he knew
that was a good thing. He could tell she was not completely comfortable but
she did trust him somewhat and that was definitely a start.

----------------------------

The food was so good. Rin savered every bite she took. This time they had
given her something different: tender beef and gravy with rice, string beans
and a roll. The main meal was different, but they had given her a giant piece
of chocolate cake again and with it, a cup of vanilla ice cream. She soon
finished off most of her gravy and rice and started in on the cake and ice
cream. While eating, she did not look at the hanyou who was watching her
quietly. For some reason, his amber gaze did not bother her. In it she had
seen... warmth. No one ever looked at her in that way. She was used to hard
glares of contempt, irriation and annoyance from most of the teachers and
kids at school....

school...

...How bad would they treat her now? Now that everyone...knew...what
kind of person she really was? If they couldn't stand her before, they
would be ready to lynch her now. And..the others...they would laugh...
and gossip about how dirty she was, what a tramp she was, what a filthy
twisted whore for...enjoying...

Rin shut the worry away. She would take it when it came. Now, right this
moment, she was eating ice cream and chocolate cake, and sitting next to
her...was someone who did know...and did not hate her or think she was dirty.
Well, at least that is what she thought by the way he acted. He had...held
her so tight...and said such...strange but...gentle words.

After licking the last dab of ice cream from the plastic bowl, Rin sighed
and leaned back, rubbing her stomach and feeling quite full. She wasn't used
to eating that much at one time. She chanced a look at the hanyou. His eyes
were closed and he was breathing deeply in sleep. Rin tilted her head to the
side, wondering: He was a hanyou, half youkai, but he was also half human,
and he did not frighten her like most demons did. Sitting there, asleep, he
seemed...sweet...and very...cute...and those ears. She couldn't help looking
at them and recalling how soft and fuzzy they felt. A part of her wanted to
touch them again but she refrained. Allowing a small smile, she tapped him
on the arm. His eyes slowly opened to reveal a clouded darker amber. He
lifted his head in groggy motion and blinked several times.

"Sorry. Fell asleep. Guess I should let you get some rest."

He stood up and stretched, scratching his ear at the same time. Dropping
his raised arms, he let out a yawn while rolling the table with the empty
tray to the side. "Do you need anything before I go?"

Rin bit her bottom lip. She didn't want him to leave. She felt safe with him
here. "Do you have to leave?"

He shrugged and shook his head. "No. I can stay here if you want me to."

She nodded. "Please?"

"Okay, just let me tell the night nurse and get a cot to sleep on."

---------------------------------------------------

The second Rin's door silently slid shut behind him, he heard Sesshoumaru's
icy tone. "InuYasha." He turned to see his brother leaning against the wall,
staring at the floor.

"What?"

"I saw you, InuYasha. I saw you holding her."

"Yeah, so what? I had to keep her from running off."

Sesshoumaru's stare switched to him and hardened into a glare. "I heard what
you told my mate. I saw how you held her."

With more irritation than he intended, InuYasha snapped back. "So. What
of it? I was just trying to calm her down."

Before he could blink, Sesshoumaru had him pinned to the wall, sharp
claws almost piercing the skin on his throat. Struggling to get the iron like
grip loose, InuYasha growled low. "Let me go, asshole."

Sesshoumaru's eyes flashed red as he snarled out just above a whisper.
"Know this, half-breed. I am not weak. I do not fear anything."

The hard grip on his throat was violently ripped away. InuYasha glared at
his brother's retreating backside. He wanted to call him a liar but bit
his tongue, not wanting to cause a scene.

-------------------------------------------

Rin watched the dog eared hanyou leave and got up. Awkwardly rolling the
IV stand with her, she went to the bathroom then brushed her teeth. By the
time she had settled back in the bed the hanyou came in carrying a folded
cot. He went about the task of unfolding and setting the cot straight. After
he had finished, he smiled. "Everything alright?"

She gave a nod. "Yes."

He seemed satisfied with her answer and got comfortable on the cot. She, too,
closed her eyes and fell asleep.

----------------------------------------------------

InuYasha opened his eyes to the shadowed light of the room. He could tell it
was still night, probably sometime close to dawn. Something had woke him. He
sat up and sniffed, picking up the scent that had invaded his dreams. With
quiet movements, he stood and looked at Rin. Frowning, InuYasha walked to
the side of the bed. Glistening tear tracks lined her pale cheeks. She was
crying in her sleep.

At a loss, he simply stared.

The drops slid over her skin and dripped to the brown strands of her hair.
They fell from closed eyes, spilling over peaceful features. Sadness mixed
with the salty scent of her quiet weeping. She was feeling despair, most
likely a symptom of the yet to be accepted bond between her and Sesshoumaru.
Her lips parted in a low, anguished moan. The peaceful lines of her face
then cringed into a mixed expression of pain and sorrow. More tears fell.

He had had enough. He couldn't stand to see those tears.

InuYasha eased onto the bed and laid down next to her small form. Carefully,
he slid one arm under her shoulders, hoping the slight movement would not wake
her. Unfortunately, it did, and her eyes fluttered open.

He froze.

She blinked several times before weakly lifting her watery brown pools to him.

Not knowing how she would react, he whispered an explaination.
"You were crying in your sleep. I..."

Then the girl did something totally unexpected: She leaned into him, buried her
nose
in his shirt, and let out a long, painful sigh. "Puppy."

InuYasha, somewhat stunned, slowly shook his head. With a silent humph, he
smiled and settled in, letting her snuggle closer. "Yes. Puppy."

---------------------------------------------

Kaede opened Rin's door and stopped, staring, her jaw nearly dropping at
the scene. InuYasha was in the bed with Rin and Rin was lying with her head
on his chest and one arm wrapped around his waist. The hanyou twitched then
opened his eyes. Yawning, he brought his free arm up and stretched. "Hey,
Kaede."

Kaede moved closer, speaking low as to not wake Rin. "Good morning, InuYasha."

She stepped to the side of the bed and raised a brow. "Care to explain what
you are doing in Rin's bed?"

He let out a sleepy sigh. "It's a long story."

---------------------------------------

Hearing voices, Rin groaned and began waking. She pulled out of sleep
and blinked, clearing her vision. Underneath her cheek, it was warm and
that warmth, she blinked some more, was solid and firm, with buttons, a
pocket, and the color of dark red. For an instant, she started until she
remembered. He had...held her...to...comfort her. She unwrapped her arm
from his waist and turned to see Kaede standing by the bed.

Kaede smiled and sat down on the chair. Next to her, she felt the hanyou slide
out of the bed. Kaede glanced at the hanyou. "InuYasha, why don't you go get
some breakfast. I will stay with Rin for awhile."

Rin watched the silver haired hanyou walk around the bed. "Inu...Yasha?
Is that...your name?"

He smirked, showing the tip of a fang. "Yep. That's my name. Use it if you
need me." With that, he left, giving a small wave and a smile before going
out the door.

"Are you alright, child?"

Rin looked at her old nanny. She tried to smile but she felt so tired.
"I...feel better than I did yesterday."

The older woman patted her hand. "I am glad, little one. Very glad. Did
you eat something?"

"Yes. I ate...last night. InuYasha called in something from the cafeteria."

Kaede's gray brows furrowed in question. "InuYasha, huh? I would like
to talk to you about InuYasha, Rin."

"Okay."

"Was he...nice to you...last night?"

"Yes, I was crying in my sleep, and he...." Rin trailed off, somewhat
worried how it must have looked to see InuYasha sleeping next to her.

"Did he say anything?"

Rin, feeling a little uncomfortable, gripped a part of her thin hospital
gown and began twisting it. "Yes...he told me...that it would get better
if I stayed and let him and his brother help me."

Kaede's tone was genuinely honest. "What would get better, Rin?"

Swallowing hard, Rin picked up Teddy and held him to her chest.
"What I feel inside. It hurts...inside...a lot worse than...before."

"Before....?"

Rin did not want to talk about before so she did not reply to Kaede's
unfinished question. Instead, she looked at the blinds. "Can you pull up
the blinds for me? I want to see the sunlight."

Rin heard the smile in Kaede's reply. "Yes, I can." The older woman walked
to the other side of the room and opened the blinds. "Is this better?"

Gazing at the brightening sunlight, Rin let out a long breath. "Yes, Thank you."

Kaede looked at her for a long moment before returning to her bedside and
taking a seat. "Rin."

Rin looked at the older woman. "Yes?"

"This...pain...you are feeling inside. I want to talk about it. Is it getting worse?"

Somewhat nervous, Rin gave a nod. "Yes."

With a sad smile, Kaede returned her nod. "I know why you hurt inside.
Your spirit is in pain and there is a reason for it. You need to be told
why you hurt, Rin. Why you feel...incomplete."

Not knowing what Kaede was referring to but desperately needing to know,
Rin braced herself for the answer. "Why...do I feel this way?"

The old woman held her gaze. "I must first explain some things." Her wrinkled
finger pointed to her shoulder. "Do you remember what happened to your
shoulder?"

Looking down at the blue blanket on her bed, Rin reluctantly told the truth.
"I...was bitten."

"Yes. You were. Do you recall who bit you?"

Starting to shake, Rin held Teddy tighter. "I...remember."

"I want you to calm down, Rin, and relax. Take a deep breath."

Rin did as ordered and took deep breaths until she stopped shaking.

"Good girl. Now. You remember who bit you, correct?"

Not speaking, Rin only nodded.

"It was a youkai, wasn't it?"

Again, Rin just nodded, holding the memory at bay.

"Rin, listen to me. The youkai did not bite you to purposely hurt you."

Rin listened.

"He bit you...to mark you...as his mate."

Rin stopped breathing, her heart beat heavily into slowing thumps.
Did she just hear what she thought she heard? That youkai...bit her...
to mark her, as his mate? She now belonged to that...that...demon? That
angel of demons wanted to... Suddenly, she felt very sick. Everything
began to spin and she closed her eyes in an attempt to stop the world
from moving. A moan escaped her lips as she bowed her head and buried her
nose in Teddy's fur.

"Rin? Rin? Are you alright? Talk to me, Rin."

She shook her head, rubbing her nose against Teddy's furry head. Her eyes
burned. It was too much. Too much.

---------------------------------------

Rin did not know how long the slow, hot tears fell. Why? Why her? That
youkai hated her. It was plain as day how much he despised her presense.
Why had he...done that? Had it been a mistake? Had he done it accidentally?
He must have.

Before, when she believed he wanted to kill her, she understood because he
was a youkai and she had trespassed on his land. She had wronged him by
trying to steal what was his on his land. It was so simple: She wronged
him, he wanted to and had a right to...hurt her.

But now, what she had believed, had been wrong. He had not been trying to
kill her when he...

Oh, no, it was much worse...

She gulped in air at the violent flashback. The stabbing pain when he grabbed
her arms, the terrible agony in her shoulder when his sharp teeth sunk in
and ripped...

Rin felt her entire body shudder under the knowledge. She was marked, forever
branded, forever belonging to that terrible demon, forever condemned to a
life of cruel taunts and brutal torment. She could hear them now. 'dirty
tramp, demon's bitch, filthy whore' Now she would have to endure endless
abuse at school only to come back home to...

Suddenly, horrible images flashed through her head, horrific scenes of
beatings, and claws and, he would...make her...

He was a demon. Not like her father. He would...hurt her even worse when he....

She couldn't stop the shaking. She couldn't stop the tears.
She couldn't stop....

Rin felt a prick in her arm then everything faded.

------------------------------------------

Kaede was not surprised to see both brothers standing in the hallway. With a
tired sigh, she pulled the door to Rin's room shut then turned to them.
Sesshoumaru was glaring at the opposite wall while InuYasha was watching
her with expectant worry.

She rubbed her face in mental exhaustion. "I told Rin about the mark."

"What happened, Kaede? How did she take it?" InuYasha asked.

Kaede asserted her weariness and regarded them both. "She did not take it well."

Sesshoumaru growled. "I am aware of this, Dr. Green."

"Yes, I am sure you are, Sesshoumaru." Pausing, Kaede took in a deep breath.
"I told her that you marked her as a mate in an attempt to explain why she
was hurting on the inside. It had to be done. Rin had to be told this
knowledge. She must, in some manner, accept you in some way soon or, in
the state she is in, she will fall into a depression so painful that it
will kill her. It was a gamble that had to be made. Either tell her now
and hope that the knowledge did not upset her too badly or run the risk
of the depression over the unaccepted bond driving her past the point of
no return. It was a gamble I was willing to take. Unfortuately, Rin's
memory of you biting her was a painful one and learning exactly why you
did that to her drove her to..."

"I know what it drove her to, you old hag." Sesshoumaru snarled, interrupting.
"I could hear her tears on the first floor!"

"I am truly sorry, Sesshoumaru. The doctor sedated Rin again because he feared
she would do physical damage to herself in her traumatic state. We can only
wait until she wakes to see how she feels about the bond and if there is any
possibility that she will accept you. It doesn't have to be a physical
consumation. All Rin has to do is, in some small way, accept you. If she
does this, the depression will ease up and she will no longer be in danger."

--------------------------------------------------

InuYasha listened closely to Kaede's words. He glanced at Sesshoumaru. His
scent was riddled in despair, hopeless despair. It was so bad now that his
brother wasn't even trying to hide it anymore. As Kaede walked down the hall,
and Sesshoumaru headed for the exit, he looked at Rin's door. Rin liked him.
He had seen and smelled trust in her presense. There was still hope if she
trusted him. He could...explain about his brother, and there was a chance she
would listen to him. If Rin accepted him, and was told that Sesshoumaru was
his brother, there was hope that she would accept Sesshoumaru too. Making up
his mind, InuYasha entered Rin's room.

---------------------------------------------------

It was close to early evening. InuYasha was sitting by Rin's bed. Kaede had
come by earlier and agreed to let him stay with Rin for the rest of the day.
For several hours he waited, listening to the rhythm of her heart, closely
regarding the pattern of her breathing, taking note, at times, of the color
of her skin. What he was looking for, he did not know, maybe he was just
making sure she was okay. At the moment, he was watching her resting profile.

His ears twitched as he picked up a change in heartbeat and breathing. She
would wake soon, maybe in a matter of minutes. He held his breath in nervous
anticipation.

She opened her eyes slowly, looking forward. Her brown gaze was dull, almost
lifeless.

"Hey."

The dullness shifted as she turned her head and looked at him. Her silence
bothered him but, hoping to lighten her mood, he smiled. "Are you okay? Kaede
said you got upset....I was worried."

She did not speak, only stared, void of emotion. Brown eyes seemed to see
through him, not at him. She turned away, her gaze moved to the window and
settled there.

InuYasha, now very worried, used his nose, looking for emotion, any emotion.
He didn't find any. In her scent, she was dead. For the first time in his
life, he was truly scared, scared for this girl. InuYasha reached out and
touched her hand. She did not move or say anything to acknowledge his touch.
He picked up her small hand and held it in both of his. "Rin?"

She only blinked once.

Heart beating hard, InuYasha reached out further and touched her arm.
"Come on, Rin. Please talk to me. Please?"

Still there was no response and her arm was so cold. She was cold.
His worry was turning into panic. Keeping calm, he stood, walked around
the bed, then knelt to her eye level. Those brown eyes remained fixed on
the window. He could see the sunlight reflecting back at him. He moved into
her line of sight. "Rin...It's me: InuYasha. Talk to me."

She only stared through him.

On impulse, he grabbed her upper arms. "Rin."

This time, her gaze wavered.

He gave her a gentle shake. "Rin?"

Those brown eyes focused, seeing him. Salty tears welled up, dripped from her
long brown lashes and slid from the corners of her eyes. However,
her expression remained blank. With slow gentleness, he reached out and
wiped the tears from her cheeks. "Hey, sweetie. Why are you crying?
A pretty girl like you shouldn't cry. I told you before that everything
was going to be okay now. I won't let anyone ever hurt you again. I promised
before and I am promising you now. You are safe and I will do everything in
my power to keep you that way."

Rin blinked then looked down at his hand. She followed its movement as he
reached up. When his warm palm cupped the cool wetness of her cheek, her eyes
went to his. It seemed like forever until a light of emotion finally dawned in
her brown depths. Then he smelled them: pain and sorrow, emotions so intense
they made his chest knot in despair. Deep inside, a part of him was relieved
that he had broken through; got to her before she strayed away from this
reality and into death, for that is where she had been heading. Her spirit
was dying underneath the surface and he had had to break her barrier so she
could let those emotions out.

Her eyes closed and she began to weep with quiet whimpers. InuYasha, not
caring anymore about how she would react, laid down next to her and wrapped
his arms around her small shuddering form. He smoothed her bangs and rocked
her like he did before while whispering that she was safe, safe here, with
him.

After a long time, Rin's crying subsided to occasional sniffs. He was now
leaned back against the pillows and Rin was lying on his chest. Her tears
had pretty much soaked his shirt. He smiled a little when she reached up
and rubbed her eyes. Grabbing a tissue from the nightstand, he handed it
to her. "I know this is a little late but I thought you might want to blow
your nose."

She accepted the tissue and used it.

Rin sniffed a few more times then became quiet.

He was about to say something when he heard her speak.

"Why?"

Her voice was raspy and her tone, broken. He sighed with her sadness.
"Why what, Rin?"

"Why are you being nice to me?"

"I care about you. Isn't that enough?"

She was quiet for several moments before speaking again. "I, I guess so."

"Rin, do you trust me?"

She nodded, her cheek rubbing against his chest. "Yes."

"If I told you something, would you believe me? would you believe I was
telling you the truth?"

Again, she nodded.

InuYasha held her tighter to him. "Rin, listen to me, okay?"

"Okay."

Now satisified he had her rational attention, InuYasha closed his eyes and
began. "Rin, the youkai that marked you..." He felt her small form go rigid.
"....was my half-brother."

He waited for something, anything but...nothing. "Did you hear me, Rin?"

Her answer was hesitant. "Yes...I heard you."

"My half-brother is a full youkai, a dog demon. I am only half dog demon.
We had different mothers. Remember, I told you about my brother? He is the
one that marked you, He and I were the ones that came and helped you when
your father was...hurting you. He is the one paying for everything. He is
the one that is scared that you will not accept him as a mate. I know that
he hurt you when he bit you but...he won't hurt you again. He has tried
his best to make sure you are alright. He wants you to get better. He cares
about you too, the same as I do."

InuYasha waited patiently. He had explained everything the best he could.
He only hoped Rin believed in him enough to understand. "If you allow him
to be part of your life, allow him to help you, the hurt on the inside will
get better. I promise."

He played with her bangs and smoothed them back. "Do you believe me, Rin?"

For a long moment nothing could be heard except for Rin's gentle breathing
and relaxed heartbeat. She was not asleep, but she was not answering him
either.

Taking a chance, he asked again. "Tell me. Do you believe me?"

His answer was given when she sighed heavily, squeezed his waist, and nodded
against his shirt, her voice plainly hesitant but a bit stronger in courage.
"I believe you, InuYasha."

He let out a long breath of relief.

Rin spoke again, this time her tone quivered slightly. "InuYasha?"

"Yeah, what is it, sweetie?"

"Will you stay here when he comes to see me? Please?

"If you want me to, I will. Just until you get used to him. He's not such a
bad guy once you get to know him. Will you give him a chance?"

"I...don't know yet. I don't know."

InuYasha gave her a squeeze of a hug. "Thats okay. You can take your time."

-----------------------------------------------

Rin sighed as she finished off the last bit of dinner that had been brought
to her. Kaede, who was with her now, smiled. "Was it good?"

Rubbing her belly, Rin nodded. "Very." She leaned back on the pillows as Kaede
rolled the table with the empty food tray to the side of the room. InuYasha
had left right before dinner saying he would be back later that night. Rin
almost laughed at the weird face he made when he said he needed a bath and a
change of clothes before people started telling him he stunk.

She thought of InuYasha. Really, he was the first real male friend she had ever
had. That is...if she could consider him a friend. He had yet to say they were
friends but he did say he cared about her and that was what friends did: They
cared about one another. Smiling to herself, Rin closed her eyes. Yes. He was
a friend and she trusted him. He had held her, and...comforted her... and
he...smiled at her...alot. He was really nice, and cute too: those sweet
doggy ears, long white hair, amber eyes....amber eyes....
His brother, she remembered, had amber eyes... The first time she had seen
him...peeking in his window: he was tall and glowing in white light like an
angel. She had thought he was an angel until...he had caught her snooping
in his yard. Even in the fleeing fear back to her house, she had believed
he was too beautiful to be a demon. She had named him the angel of demons.
She didn't know until he had bitten her how close she had been to the truth.
Yes. It had been very painful when he had bitten her. Even now, she trembled
at the memory. Yet, why he had done such a thing was still a mystery. Why
did he mark her? Did he like her? Did he want her? As InuYasha said, he
was paying for her stay and for everything else and he wanted nothing in
return. Nothing...in return. She did not have to pay him back in any
way...but... as InuYasha explained, because of the bond, she would have
to...live with him. How would he treat her? Would he be nice? Would
he let her...go outside?

All these questions swam in her head until she stopped the torrent of
musings with a single nervous thought: She would have to see him again...soon.
InuYasha said it had to be soon, maybe tonight or tomorrow. Her entire body
shuddered in anxious trepidation. She didn't want to see him but...she had
to. If she just got it over with, then she wouldn't have to see him again
until she left the hospital with him.

Rin opened her eyes slowly. She turned her head to see Kaede sitting and
working a crossword puzzle. "Kaede."

She looked up. "Yes, child?"

"I will see him tonight."

Kaede's eyes widened while she slowly gave a single nod. "Okay, Rin I will
tell him. When do you want to see him?"

Rin let out an anxious breath. "I wanted to wait until InuYasha came back so he
could be with me but...I guess it will be alright to see him...alone.
Maybe...an hour from now?"

The older woman smiled and patted her hand. "I will go tell him now. Do
you want some time to yourself to wait?"

Rin, thinking it would be a good idea, nodded.

Kaede got up and left, leaving Rin alone with her thoughts...to wait.

-----------------------------------------------------

Sesshoumaru, standing at the large waiting room window, stared out at the
growing darkness. Deep inside, all he could feel and think was one thing:
He needed to see her. Just see her. Just a few moments in her presense to
see if she was...okay. Was that so bad? Did she fear him that much? Would
she ever allow him to come near her? Now that she knew...why he had bitten
her? Would she at least even consider accepting his presense or were they
both doomed? He wouldn't, couldn't blame her if she was scared of him. He
had...hurt her so badly. He had savagely marked her with instincts
provoked by anger. He wouldn't be surprised if the very sight of him....
frightened her to death.

Sesshoumaru, lost in his despair, sighed. It was hopeless.

Even in his silent depression, he sensed the old human woman approach.
"What is it, Dr. Green?"

Her ancient voice held a light air. If Sesshoumaru did not know better, he
would have thought it was hope. "I see your inu-youkai senses are very
keen, Sesshoumaru."

He turned and eyed her cooly. "I am a demon of the highest rank, Dr. Green.
There are not many more powerful than I and I count my father in those
that are."

She raised a gray brow. "Yet, I see your humility needs a great deal of work."

He was about to rebuke her colorful observation when she waved him silent
with her hand.

"All teasing aside, I have come with good news."

Sesshoumaru inwardly took notice. "Yes?"

The old woman smiled. "Rin says she will see you one hour from now."

"She did?"
Kaede nodded. "Yes, Sesshoumaru, she did." With that soft smile lingering
on her aged features, she turned and left.

Sesshoumaru stood there, somewhat stunned by Kaede's news. Rin...wanted
to see... him? She actually asked for...him.

-------------------------------------------

It had been approximately one hour and now Sesshoumaru stood outside of
Rin's door, staring at the handle. His heart thumped hard in his chest
and his palms were hot and wet with sweat. Never in his entire life had he
ever felt this way. It seemed as if his entire body would break apart from
the shaking.

Taking a deep breath, he reached out, grasped the handle, pushed, and walked in.

Consciously, he tested the air, tasting every scent, wanting to know before
he saw her how she felt.

His legs grew weak as his senses were overrun by

intense unease

mixed with

waves of distress

and underneath this was

a bitter hint of pure fear.

He stopped, seeing her.

The head of the bed was elevated and she was awake, comfortably resting
against the white pillows, her soft brown gaze fixed on her hands which
were in her lap. She knew he was there. He could feel it.

Silently, he stood there, waiting. His voice had left him for he did not know
what to say. So...he waited, waited as moments passed, wishing he knew what
to do but...he didn't.

He took note of all her slight movements: the rising of her chest as she
breathed, the simple motion of her lashes when she blinked, the gentle
gripping of the blanket within her fingers.

Finally, those fingers stopped moving. He heard her near silent sigh and saw
her nervously lick her bottom lip before biting it. She visably swallowed
before lifting her brown gaze slowly...to him.

His breath caught at the raw emotions in her dark brown depths:
apprehension, uncertainty, and...puzzlement.

He forced himself to speak. "Hello."

She looked away from him, staring back at the blanket. "Hi."

------------------------------------------

The very sight of him caused her heart to beat fast and hard. Rin willed the
racing in her chest to slow as she looked back at the blue blanket on her bed.
He was not what she had expected to see. He did not appear cold and mean. He
did not look crisp and collected. No. What she saw when she looked at him
was... a weathered torn creature with a weary stance: his dark blue shirt,
disheveled, his silvery white hair, mussed, his amber eyes tainted
with...worry. The angel of demons now had a failing spirit that
threatened to break his wings. He did not...frighten her...as much.

She offhandedly picked at the blanket with shaky fingers. Rin could actually
feel the wall of silence between them. Without thinking, she reached up and
touched her left shoulder, placing her palm flat against that spot where he
had marked her. Not knowing why, she said, "I...I was told...that...you...
marked me..." Rin paused, not daring to look at him again for fear of seeing
his contempt or disgust. After a moment, she spoke again, this time, daring
to ask, chancing his anger. "Why?"

She heard him take a step closer. Inwardly, she flinched, bracing herself for
any kind of pain. Rin knew she couldn't hide her fear from a youkai but she had
to try. Inside, she was scared. The pounding of her heart started again, this
time almost loud enough in her ears to drown out everything else. He did not
answer and the longer he stood there, the more she trembled. Had she ticked
him off so much he couldn't speak? Was he about to hit her for speaking
and asking?

Her eyes were starting to burn. She should have kept her mouth shut. Any
second now he was going to.... Rin clenched her eyes shut and hugged herself,
praying her punishment would be quick and not too painful.

"Please...."

Rin heard the voice, the word, so close...so rasped with torment.

"Please...my mate."

She opened her eyes at his words, the sound of them, so unsteady and deep
and pleading.

Rin slowly moved her gaze from the blanket to the side of the bed. There,
gripping the edge of the mattress, kneeling on one knee, head bowed, silver
hair touching the floor, was the angel of demons. She could not see his face
but he was...ever so slightly, shaking. Again, she heard him, his voice low,
almost whispered. "Please, my mate, do not...fear...me."

Shocked, Rin looked at the kneeling youkai for several moments. In
those moments, her heart slowed as her body gradually ceased shaking.
Lowering her arms, she became still, unable to look away. Something deep
inside pushed, needing to know. "What is your name?"

His shoulders seemed to slump as she heard him answer. "Sesshoumaru."

"Sesshoumaru." Rin repeated the name without thinking, listening to it
in her own voice.

At his name, he looked up. Unprepared, Rin froze, startled by how deep and
dark his amber eyes were. Trapped by his gaze, Rin stopped breathing until
finally it felt as if her heart would burst. She ripped away from those
golden chains to stare at the blanket. What she was feeling, she did not
understand. It was like being afraid and nervous at the same time. She did
not know what to expect from him. She did not know this youkai she was bound
to for the rest of her life. What was going to happen to her?

As her mind swirled with thought, something warm touched her hand. Her body
went rigid and she looked to see a large clawed hand resting on hers. She
gulped, part of her wanting to jerk her hand away, part of her afraid of
what would happen if she did. So she sat, staring, until she heard his deep
voice again. "Rin." He said her name. Hearing him say it..in that way...was
strangely pleasant, but...she was still nervous and uneasy...so she looked
away again and let out a choppy breath, one riddled with hurt from her
heart.

"Please, Rin."

Rin bit her bottom lip, the warmth on her hand felt hot enough to burn her.
She blinked the sting from her eyes. "Yes?"

"Do you...fear me?"

She wanted to cry but spoke the truth instead. "You...scare me...some."

He spoke again, his tone faltering. "Will you...always feel...this way?"

Rin sniffled. "I...don't know."

His clawed hand left hers, allowing the burning warmth to fade.
"Will you accept me?"

She did not understand what he was asking of her. Accept him how? She
already belonged to him by the branding mark. What did he want from her?
"What do you mean?"

"Will you accept me...in any way? If only my presense is all you will
allow, then...I will understand."

Rin breathed in deeply, searching her thoughts and wondering about the new
feeling inside. Could she accept his presense? From what her heart told her... .

.

.

.....yes...she could. "I...will let you be near me. I can accept that."

----------------------------------------

Sesshoumaru leaned back and gazed at his mate. At her admitted acceptance,
a great weight lifted on the inside. It was as if death's cloud had vanished
along with the shadows. He stood. "I will leave you now."

She did not look at him but nodded. "Okay."

With nothing else to say, he left the room.

----------------------------------------------------

Rin picked up Teddy and held him to her chest. She felt a little better than
she had before. At least it was over. She had seen and talked to him. It must
have been enough because she really did feel better now. Sighing, she settled
down to go to sleep. .

.

.

.

.

.

End.

OH Yea, the end, didn't think I could pull off this chapter but I did.

Scarecrow.

Review responses~*~ I greatly appreciate everyone's imput on this story.
Your comments help me make it through to the finish line.

Sesshoumarusgirl56: Sequel coming up. ^_^

Kae Noel: Poetic review. ^_^

Gonew/thWind

Vicious: Sess didn't think anything of Rin and Inu. He was just a little
jealous that Inu was holding Rin. Rowrrr..

jctl

Setryochi: I won't be skipping years, but maybe weeks in the sequel. Time
does have to pass for them some.

flowers: thank you flowers, I have tried my best to keep him in character.
Sess and Rin are so good in angsty situations. I am trying to write a novel
now, don't know how good it will be but I love the adventure I go through
with my characters.

animegirl007: will try to email ya. I tried to put a light at the end of
the tunnel.

Erin: Yes, I know all those questions need to be resolved. Will try my best
in the sequel. Glad you enjoyed it so much.

Koneko-neko: I blushed at your sweet comments. Thank you.

The Dragon

RikuMaru: Can't do riku, the story is too dark and rin is too messed up at
the moment. I don't think, as noble as Sess is on the inside, that he would
take Rin at his point.

shaid

Red Angel

friendly reader: I love the way you put it. Sess and Rin are so strong
but so weak. It summed the story up so well. I would have never thought it.

gemini: nah, he didn't jump. ^_^

anhimals: your wait was not in vain. She did. A little

INUNAIOMI

Shadiyaray

me

Someone out there

Tori: Kagura issue in sequel

destiny

Kioki

Tiranth

yue

Miko_a8: I try to make the reader feel what the character is feeling. If I
succeed then I know I am doing a good job. ^_^

MistressAlf: you are right about Sess's growing and maturing (emotion) heh,
I just love giving him emotions that make him uneasy.

Leishka

Red

Muscrat

Beruda

Red Angel

Kioki: Sesshoumaru was a jealous that Inu was holding Rin but Sess wouldn't
dare show that emotion, especially around his brother. He heard what InuYasha
said about him so he did not think InuYasha was trying to make the moves on
her. I will try to email you kioki but most of my free time is writing and
typing.

stella

Fantasy Cat: 16 was the ending FC

yasmin: I guess I need to make an update list for other readers. Hmmmm...

mischief

Yogi Mutoh

lowla

SP777

dragonflyelj: Yeah, I need to bring Shippo in there. Hmmm He will be in the
sequel.

quanku

Tori: Sess was a bit jealous but he knew InuYasha was not trying to make a
move on Rin.

New Fan: Hey girl, got your email but haven't had a chance to write you back.
Yeah, Sess is a little jealous that Inu was holding his mate.
- 15
- 16
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Heart of Pain, Heart of Ice