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Fifty Years	By : nika1280 Category: InuYasha > Yaoi - Male/Male > InuYasha/Sessh?maru > InuYasha/Sessh?maru Views: 27198 -:- Recommendations : 4 -:- Currently Reading : 3
Disclaimer: I do not own InuYasha, nor make money from this story.

Chapter List
- 15
- 16
- 17
Sorry for the long delay. I know it's been over 3 months, but life interrupted in a big way. I had this chapter written at the end of July, but life conspired against me. First, my computer died. It would work, but crashed anytime I tried to go onto ff, aff or mediaminer, so I eventually gave up. It took a while to get a replacement, and then the file transfer was another delay. My sister had her baby, and I had to meet the newest member of the family which meant a 1,000 mile trip for two weeks (with no internet--I almost died). The biggest reason, however, is that I've recently had to put someone close to me into rehab. It was a harrowing experience, wrought with tears and anger and I'm still not over it, but I have to move on. I hope you enjoy this story, and I will start regularly updating again. Look for a new chapter to Moonlit Sun soon!
Per Request: List of children and ages

Keiji and Akeno (twin boys, 20 years old but look 10, look like Sess and Inu's father)

Mareo (boy�18 but looks 9, has golden hair and eyes with no markings)

Kameko (girl�12 but looks 7, looks exactly like Sesshomaru with dog ears)

Izayoi (girl�11, but looks 6, looks exactly like Inuyasha's mother with lavender stripes on cheeks)

Inuginsenshi (boy�10 but looks 5, looks exactly like Sesshomaru)
Time Frame: Year 22 of 50 years
Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha, Sesshomaru or any other character from the series created by the wonderful Ms. Takahashi. I do, however, own any OC's and the plot to this story.

~*~
Keiji and Akeno had frowns on their faces. Being the oldest, Keiji and Akeno had smelled the scent of decay around their mother, but didn�t want to admit to themselves what that particular smell meant. Even if their younger siblings didn�t know what the strange smell was, they did. They had detected that odor on many animals when they were younger, and all of them were dying. If their mother smelled like a dying animal, something was terribly wrong.
"I love you all, so very much. You know I�ve been sick a long time, and well�I didn�t think it would be this hard to tell you. I never wanted to have to say this to you. This isn�t easy for me, kids, so I�m just going to come out with it�I�m dying," Inuyasha told them, gauging their faces for a reaction.
Silence reigned for a few minutes. The children, at first, were either too shocked or too numb to speak or do anything other than breathe. Soon, Inuyasha and Sesshomaru could see comprehension dawn on their young faces. It was a tragic sight.
"No!" Inuginsenshi screamed, flinging himself toward his mother.
The little boy grabbed onto his mother�s shoulders and buried his head. Sobs racked his small frame, shaking the futon with their ferocity. Tears flowed like rivers down his chubby cheeks, steadily falling on the bed. Anguished whimpers escaped the child�s throat, letting everyone in aural range know that the boy was experiencing the worst sort of grief.
"You can�t die, Mama. I�ll be all alone. Please, don�t die, Mama. Don�t leave me alone," the boy pleaded, evidence of his sorrow streaming down his face.
"You�re not going to be all alone, baby. Your father will take good care of you when I�m gone. He loves you just as much as I do, Gin," Inuyasha whispered to his son, desperate to stop the boy�s tears.
"I don�t even know him," Gin choked out between sobs.
Inuyasha�s eyes flew to Sesshomaru. He could tell that his mate was hurt, but the little boy was right. Inuginsenshi didn�t know much about Sesshomaru, and he would be uneasy around him without his mother�s familiar presence.
His Mama was leaving him, never to return. He was never going to see his Mama again. It was incomprehensible to the young demon. Even worse, his Mama was leaving him alone with the strange demon that was supposedly his father. Inuginsenshi didn�t know him�Lord Sesshomaru was a stranger to the distraught boy. The Great Dog Demon was cold and aloof, not warm and approachable like his mother. Lord Sesshomaru scared him, and Inuginsenshi did not like being around him for long periods of time.
What was going to happen now? His Mama always told him stories when they were doing chores. He played games with him when all of his brothers and sisters were too busy. Inuyasha tucked him into bed at night and made him feel as if he were the most important little boy in the whole world. Inuginsenshi knew his mother loved him unconditionally, but he knew nothing about his father.
Would such a great and powerful being even want a weak child like Inuginsenshi for a son? Would Sesshomaru love him as he is or would he cast him aside for his more capable siblings? All of these thoughts and more filled Inuginsenshi�s head, increasing the force and volume of his cries. His sobs transformed into high keening wails that reached the heavens with his grief.

"Gin, I�m so sorry. You have to know that I don�t want to leave you or your brothers and sisters. If I could, I would stay with you forever," Inuyasha soothed, cradling the boy in his arms.
"I�ll be better, I promise. I won�t complain any more, if you get better Mama. I�ll do whatever you want," the boy tried to bargain, hoping he could do anything to stop his mother�s death. He held tightly onto his mother, afraid if he let go, Inuyasha would no longer be with him.
"Oh Gin," Inuyasha cooed, "it�s not your fault. You are a wonderful boy, and it�s nothing that anyone has done to make me sick. It�s just how life is sometimes."
Inuyasha�s soothing words did little to calm the child. In fact, it seemed the more he tried, the worse the boy became. Soon his wails echoed throughout the corridors, gaining momentum as the reality of the situation set in. His mother was dying�the one person who loved him unconditionally was leaving him. Inuyasha was his world, and for young Inuginsenshi, his world was ending.
Sesshomaru couldn�t stand to see his son in such a state, and picked the boy up from his mother�s arms, rubbing his back in a soothing manner. Inuginsenshi just cried harder, burying his face into his father�s chest. His little body trembled with the force of his cries as he dug his hands into his father�s kimono. He nuzzled his cheek into his father�s neck, sniffing his scent and drawing comfort from the unfamiliar demon. Sesshomaru brushed his cheek against his son�s forehead, squeezing his arms around the lost little boy. Gin gripped Sesshomaru tightly, like he was the boy�s only anchor in life. His tiny body was unable to contain the magnitude of his grief, and sorrow flowed off him in waves, drenching his father and the entire room in his misery.
For once, the Western Lord was at a loss. His son was sobbing uncontrollably in his arms and there was nothing he could do to comfort the child. Sesshomaru was no fool�he knew that his youngest was not comfortable around him and did not particularly care for his company. He knew this as much as he knew that it was his own fault that he was estranged from his son. Unfortunately, knowing and seeing are two different things. Seeing his son, his mirror image, wracked with grief was almost too much for him to handle. He felt lost, something he never thought he would experience.
Rubbing his son�s back, Sesshomaru realized the magnitude of their ten year separation. He was missing from his children�s lives for an entire decade, time during which they were exclusively in their mother�s company. It only made sense that the children were more attached to their mother than to him�they hadn�t the luxury of interacting with him on a daily basis. How much more difficult will the loss of Inuyasha be on them because of their feelings of abandonment? Why didn�t he think of these things sooner? Sesshomaru could only shake his head and continue stroking his crying son�s back. Hopefully, whatever measure of solace he could offer would be enough.
"Mama, I�m gonna miss you," Kameko and Izayoi said at the same time. The girls walked over to their mother holding each other�s hands. Tears ran down their cheeks, and their faces flushed red.
"Didn�t the medicine make you better, Mama?" Izayoi asked, climbing into her mother�s lap.
Izayoi couldn�t believe her ears. Her mother was dying. She thought for sure that everything would be fine since they were back with their father, but it seemed that their mother was sicker than any of them realized. Izayoi had known that Inuyasha�s condition was grave, but as he had never been as sick as he was that night when his aura almost completely disappeared, she had thought he was improving. Now, she knew he wasn�t, and she didn�t know what she was going to do.
Izayoi loved her mother so much. He was the only demon besides her and Gin who had and used spiritual power. It was their special bonding time�her, Gin and their mother. They would go out into the woods surrounding the den and improve their techniques, then after a couple of hours, they would play games. Sometimes they would splash each other with water or other times they would shoot harmless icicles at the others. It was always fun and relaxing and Izayoi couldn�t remember enjoying herself more than she did those times.
"Yeah Mama�the healer should�ve fixed it," Kameko commented, leaning on Inuyasha�s shoulder.
Kameko felt cold, numb. It seemed as if all warmth had left her upon hearing her mother�s proclamation. It couldn�t be real�her mother promised that he would never leave them. Whenever Kameko felt scared and lonely, her mother would sing songs that their grandmother taught him and tell her how much he loved her. When they left the den and Kameko was apprehensive about their new life, Inuyasha promised that he would always be with them, no matter what. How was her mother supposed to keep that promise now? Would everything be fine without him?
Kameko didn�t think so. She loved her father as well as her mother, but the love she felt for her mother was different, stronger. Now that her parents had gotten together again, she didn't want to be without either of them. It seemed that she had no choice. Her mother was her whole life for the past ten years, and she didn�t know how she would face life without him. She would try, however, because she knew that her mother wouldn�t want her to wallow in her misery. It would be hard, Kameko thought, but as long as she loved her mother, he would always be with them.
"I�m sorry girls, but there was nothing anyone could do. The healer tried, your father tried, everyone tried. This sickness is just too strong," he said, rocking his daughters.
The girls continued to cry, holding on to their mother for dear life. Sesshomaru eventually had to come and pick up both girls and take them with him to the window seat. Gin had already fallen asleep, tears still leaking from his closed eyes.
"I don�t want you to go, Mama," Mareo finally stated, his eyes and nose running.
Mareo had tried not to cry because he was a big boy, and big boys don�t cry, but at the thought of never seeing his mother again, he felt the hated liquid seep into his eyes. It wasn�t fair�his Mama was always supposed to be with him. Who else was going to read books with him and talk about the characters? Who was going to comfort him in the middle of the night when he had a nightmare? Who was going to sing silly songs with him when they were bored? What was going to happen now?
"I don�t want to go, Mareo," Inuyasha said, tears of his own finally leaving his eyes. He viciously swiped them away�he had to be strong for his children.
"Mama, Mama, Mama, Mama, Mama," the boy cried over and over, unable to say anything else. Inuyasha just tightened his grip on his son, his precious golden boy.
Keiji and Akeno watched everything, their hearts� breaking. How could this have happened? They�d just reunited with their father, and now they were losing their mother. Their father�if he hadn�t sent them away all those years ago, their mother would have been able to get the medicine he needed, and he wouldn�t be dying. Yes, it was all their father�s fault, and they were going to make sure that he knew it.
"It�s your fault!" Akeno screamed at his father, rage pouring off him.
"You made us leave and Mama got sick," Keiji accused, equally upset.
"If you had been there, he wouldn�t be dying," Akeno said, balling up his fists.
Sesshomaru�s eyes widened in shock. Although he blamed himself, he never thought his sons would blame him for Inuyasha�s illness.
"Boys, stop it! Don�t blame your father�it�s not his fault," Inuyasha told them.
They didn�t listen. Running, the two boys leapt at their father as if to attack them. So blinded by their grief, they forgot that their little sisters were sitting in Sesshomaru�s lap. The demon lord acted quickly. He gently shoved his daughters aside and leapt to meet his sons, catching their fists in his hands. Izayoi and Kameko screamed, never having seen their brothers in such states. Their screams awakened Inuginsenshi who continued to cry, only now his tears were not only of loss but also of fear. Mareo stared on, wide-eyed, at the unfolding scene.
Akeno squirmed and kicked at Sesshomaru, hoping to get his father to release his hands. He managed to loosen one of his hands enough to scratch his father and inject poison into him. Too bad that Sesshomaru had the same poison powers, so his blood instantly healed the wound. Keiji actually managed to bite into his father�s hand, receiving a mouthful of poisonous blood that he promptly spit out. The boys continued to struggle for a few minutes longer until their rage left them and all that remained was the hollow feeling of defeat. Exhausted, they slumped at Sesshomaru�s feet, and he released their hands.
Sesshomaru didn�t hurt his sons because he understood their pain far too well. His own mother died when he was but a pup, and he blamed his father for not adequately protecting her. He had raged at his father, threatened him, and even challenged the former lord. All Toga did to his son was let him vent his frustrations and hold him when he had cried. Sesshomaru realized that was all he could offer his sons: an outlet for their frustrations and a compassionate shoulder. It hurt to know that he couldn�t fix the problem. He was their father and the ruling demon in Japan; it should have been a simple matter for him, but as Sesshomaru was learning, emotional matters often leave one without a definite answer. Instead of telling them that everything would be fine, Sesshomaru simply stroked their heads until their breathing calmed.
"Boys, come here," Inuyasha said, setting Mareo down to make room for the twins. The boy begrudgingly obliged.
"It is not your father�s fault that I�m sick. My mother had the same disease, and it killed her when I was young, too. I know how you feel, and I never wanted for this to happen," Inuyasha explained.
The twins finally broke down and cried. Inuyasha could only hold them while they expelled their grief. Sesshomaru picked up Inuginsenshi, and herded Izayoi and Kameko over to the bed. The family spent several hours together, savoring the presence of one not long for this world.
It was strange for the young family�having all of the members present after so long. Inuginsenshi curled up in Inuyasha�s lap while Izayoi and Kameko lay against his sides. Mareo sat next to his legs, leaning into his father while the twins nestled against Sesshomaru�s sides. They were content simply to be near one another, drawing comfort from each other�s presence.
The few hours they spent together as a family were some of their best times together. Inuyasha knew that his children would feel lost and alone without him, so he desperately tried to bridge the gap that separated his children from Sesshomaru. He didn�t want their children to resent their father�he was all the family they would have after Inuyasha�s passing. He wanted them to understand one another. To that end, he spent what little precious energy he had telling Sesshomaru stories of the children�s various escapades over the years. Inuyasha tried to draw his children into the discussion, and after a while, they started contributing. There was much laughter and some tears in the master bedroom that night, but neither Inuyasha nor Sesshomaru would regret it. Although their time together was concluding, it was ending on a bittersweet note. The young family forged bonds that night that would not be terminated even upon death, and as the children drifted to sleep, Inuyasha felt happiness at the fact that his family would not unravel upon his demise.

~*~

Hours later found the mates once again alone in their room. It was nearly dawn, and the children had only just gone to bed. When Inuyasha�s nose started bleeding more heavily and he experienced labored breaths, Sesshomaru put the children to bed. Instead of sending them to their normal bedrooms, he had them all sleep together in their playroom. That way, the children would be able to draw comfort from each other.
Sesshomaru and Inuyasha lay in bed, the hanyou cradled in his mate�s embrace. It wouldn�t be long now before he expired. His breaths were shorter and more painful each time, his joints felt as if they were falling apart, and his nose continued to spurt blood.
"Sesshomaru, I want you to know that I don�t hate you for what happened ten years ago," Inuyasha stated.
The hanyou knew that his beloved mate blamed himself for Inuyasha�s condition, and he would not have Sesshomaru carry around that guilt. It was misplaced. Even if his attack did hasten the disease progression or worsen his condition, it did not cause the illness. It only amplified the disease that was already there, and he refused to let his mate think that he could change the outcome.
"You are a better person than I deserve, Inuyasha. You and I both know that the poisoning only exacerbated your illness," Sesshomaru said, unable to forgive himself.
"Sess, you can�t keep blaming yourself for this. I don�t want you to blame yourself and the kids need you. I won�t be around much longer, and they�re going to look to you for strength. How can you be strong for them if you�re wallowing in your own pain?" Inuyasha asked.
Sesshomaru listened to his mate�s words. He desperately wanted to believe him, but he couldn�t. His mate was dying, and his poison played a role in his beloved�s demise. How could he live with himself after committing such an atrocity? Furthermore, how could Inuyasha forgive him for his actions?
"How can you forgive me for all I�ve done? I accused you of betraying me. I attacked you. I almost killed you. I forced you to flee for your life and you tell me that it is not my fault?" Sesshomaru questioned, unable to understand his mate.
"I love you, Sesshomaru. Nothing is going to change that. I love you now just as much as I loved you all those years ago when you accused me of cheating on you. You may think it�s stupid, but I can�t die knowing that you blame yourself for my condition," Inuyasha told him, tears welling in his eyes.
"How do I forgive myself? How can I, knowing you are dying because of me?" Sesshomaru asked his mate.
He wanted so desperately to stop these feelings of emptiness and despair that threatened to overwhelm him. His mate was dying, leaving him forever, and there was nothing he could do to stop it. Sesshomaru felt so despondent, so alone. All he wanted to do was lose himself in his mate, hold on tight and never let go.
"You have to let me go, Sesshomaru. You have to let me pass on in peace. I can�t do that if I know you won�t forgive yourself. If you can�t do it for me, do it for the children. They need you strong," Inuyasha whispered.
"I do not believe I can let you go. You are as much a part of me as I am a part of you. When you die, a piece of me will die with you," Sesshomaru stated with quiet conviction.
Inuyasha was surprised. It was not that he didn�t believe his brother�s devotion; it was that he never knew how deep his mate�s feeling ran. Hearing these words only made his death hurt that much more. He never wanted to cause his brother pain, but he had no control over what was happening.
"I know, Sess. I wish it weren�t true, but I know it is. Please, as much as I don�t want to go, you have to let me go," Inuyasha pleaded.
Sesshomaru stared at his dying mate, knowing that in this time he would do anything to keep him happy. Anything to ease his passing. As he lost himself in his brother�s golden eyes, he realized the truth behind Inuyasha�s words. He was hurting them both, and though it pained him to let go of Inuyasha, it was the right thing to do for both of them.
"I release you," Sesshomaru choked out, voice roughened from tears and pain.
"Thank you, my mate," Inuyasha said, a small smile on his face.
Inuyasha was tired, but he refused to die without there being peace between them. He needed to know that Sesshomaru and the children would be fine without him. He had been fighting this disease for so long that he wanted to rest, but he would not rest without securing his mate and children�s welfare. Now that Sesshomaru had finally come to terms with his imminent passing, Inuyasha felt a sense of peace that had been missing from his life. That still did not make dying any easier.
"I don�t want to say goodbye," Inuyasha whispered, barely able to get out the words.
"I do not know how to say goodbye to you, Beloved," Sesshomaru responded, gently stroking his mate�s hair.
"I love you so much, Sesshomaru. Even when I thought you hated me, I never stopped loving you," Inuyasha confessed.
"I know, love. I feel the same way," Sesshomaru said, desperately trying to contain his raging emotions. It wouldn�t do for him to fall apart on his mate�Inuyasha needed his strength, and he would not fail him now.
A gurgled cough came from his mate�s mouth. Sesshomaru bent his head and saw blood trickling down Inuyasha�s face. He delicately laid his mate down on the bed, propping his head up with pillows to ease his breathing.
"I do not know what I will do without you, my beloved Inuyasha," Sesshomaru admitted, wetness gathering in his eyes.
"You�ll live mate. Live for me, and for our kids. You�re all they have left," Inuyasha rasped, pain lacing his every word.
"Live? Inuyasha, I have only ever lived with you. I have only ever laughed with you. I have only ever loved you. What will I do without you?" Sesshomaru questioned, feathering light kisses across his mate�s face and chest.
"Who knew you could be so romantic, Sesshomaru," Inuyasha joked. The demon lord forced a smile.
"Only for you, my beloved Inuyasha. Only for you."
"I love you Sesshomaru. These years with you and the kids have been the best in my life. I don�t regret any of it, and I would do it again," Inuyasha gasped out, slowly fading from consciousness.
"I love you, too, Beloved. I will only love you. No other will replace you in my heart," Sesshomaru promised.
"Sess�" his mate rasped, his breaths becoming too shallow and labored for him to remain awake.
Sesshomaru continued kissing his mate, even as his breaths slowed and his heartbeat diminished. With a final kiss to his mate�s lips, Inuyasha�s heart stilled and his breathing stopped.
The hanyou, Inuyasha, was no more.
The leukemia had finally claimed its victim.

~*~
I'm not sure if I'm totally happy with this, but you've been more than patient for this update. Sorry that I'm not acknowledging individual reviews, but I'm pressed for time. I would like to thank everyone who has read this story so far--never in my wildest dreams did I think it would be this popular. Deep gratitude to those who think my writing is worthy of reviewing. Don't worry--this isn't the end. The mates have 50 years, and you will get 50 years. The next chapter will be out in 1-2 weeks. Thanks for reading.
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Fifty Years