The Girl | By : theMaven Category: InuYasha > General Views: 4511 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0 |
Disclaimer: I do not own InuYasha, nor make money from this story. |
Author’s Note: There’s nothing particularly graphic in this chapter, but there is a LOT of
innuendo, and InuYasha drops the F-bomb once. This is a fic rated for ADULTS, but I thought
I’d add this friendly little reminder.
The Girl
Chapter 2: A Life Not Lived
It was spring, now, and as Sesshomaru had promised, the three companions returned to
the forest outside the cave they’d spent the previous winter. When they’d last been there the
ground had just begun to thaw, patches of green again beginning to show themselves, poking up
from the formerly frozen earth to reach and extend towards the hazy, yellow light that filtered
down to them from the sun. Barren branches sprouted miniature green buds, still pale and soft
from their recent rebirth. Hibernating animals woke from their wintery slumber, abandoning
their dens to again forage for food, their frames significantly slimmer from the lack of
nourishment, their fat deposits depleted, their internal storehouse of food now empty.
It was a dangerous time of year, her lord had declared to no one in particular. “Hungry
animals are dangerous animals. They often abandon instinct and common sense to feed their
growing needs.” For this reason, he insisted she stay within his line of sight.
It was also mating season, Rin recalled. After eating their fill of food, the animals set out
to fulfill one of their other basic needs–the need to procreate. The winter weather was a test.
The lack of food and warmth killed off the weaker animals too old, too young or too stupid to
properly prepare for this harsher course of nature, and the survivors awoke to celebrate, seeking
out a worthy mate to ensure together their coupling produced a breed stronger than either of their
parents individually.
Even Ah-Un would partake in the post-winter ritual. He would shrug off the sluggish
torpor with a loud roar and a series of stretching and flexing. He would then set off to fulfill the
needs the gods, themselves, had imbued him–and every living creature, for that matter–with,
leaving his three, traveling companions to await his return.
Rin was human, and therefore felt no such seasonal inclinations. Sesshomaru, she
supposed, was above such unseemly behavior, and Jaken, by his own admission, was “too old” to
partake in such “life-affirming” activities. His instinctive appetites could now be sated with a
brief hunt and a simple meal, though Rin recalled, on more than one occasion, that the little toad
had recounted tales of his youth and how all the young maidens would line up, impatiently
waiting their turn for his attentions. “Yes,” she remembered him saying, “it is good to be alive.
It is good to be clever and strong, and it is good to be well sought after.” He’d then given her a
sly grin and elbowed her in the side, speaking in a hushed and secretive tone as he gave her a
knowing wink. “This Jaken has done much to ensure the continuation of his species.”
A stone then promptly struck him in the center of his head, causing the impetuous imp to
fall over backwards with a groan.
Rin laughed at the still-fresh memory. It was silly of him to think their lord and master
wouldn’t hear his little innuendo. He was a dog demon, after all. His ears didn’t miss a thing.
But . . . the trees were in full bloom, now, the forest floor blanketed in a lush carpet of
green grass. The air was alive with the sounds of birds, bees and various insects, the flutter of
their wings and the trill of their calls, filling the sky. The sunlight was no longer a hazy yellow,
but a vibrant gold, a brilliant amber closely resembling the shade of her lord’s eyes. She drew in
a deep breath, forcing back the wave of despair threatening to crash upon her, struggling to, then
successfully staving off a trickle of tears.
She pulled the skirt of her kimono slightly upwards, bunching the fabric so she’d have the
freedom to bend. She then knelt beneath the spreading the branches of the magnolia tree,
dappled sunlight spotlighting the patch of raised earth, and laid the wreath of flowers on Jaken’s
grave.
Again, she fought back tears. When her lord had returned that winter, she’d fallen ill
again. She’d awoken the morning following Jaken’s death with a slight tickle in the back of her
throat, her nose runny and a chill imbedded deeply within her bones. Ah-Un had fully fallen into
his hibernation state, effectively leaving her alone. His scaly hide no longer provided her the
warmth she’d become accustomed to, his body temperature significantly dropping once he settled
into his seasonal slumber, but being close to him was enough to provide her some modicum of
comfort. The cave was so quiet and still. She could hear the snowflakes falling outside, the fire
crackling a few feet away, and the subdued breathing and heartbeat of her two-headed
companion. She could also hear the liquid sounds of her own breathing and the shifting of the
fabric of her kimono as she attempted to find a more comfortable position, settling deeper into
the dragon’s odd embrace.
How long had it been since someone had touched her?
Of course, there were the pokings and proddings she endured from Jaken with his bony
little fingers and elbows as he nudged her awake or attempted to secretly key her in on some
private tidbit of information. Then there was Ah-Un, who she considered to be openly
affectionate with her, rubbing his muzzles against her, wrapping her in his tail while she slept...
And then there were the awkward occasions when she wasn’t riding upon the beloved beast and
she would accidentally crash into her lord from behind because she wasn’t watching where she
was going. He wouldn’t budge an inch, having a build similar to that of a stone wall, and she’d
bounce right off of him, a bright blush on her cheeks, sometimes stumbling backwards then
eventually correcting herself; other times she’d smack into him so hard, she’d immediately end
up on her backside, the wind knocked out of her.
For the most part, it seemed her lord ignored her minor transgressions, her unintentional
trespasses into his personal space, but on an occasion or two, he’d actually . . . growled at her.
She, of course, apologized profusely, bowing her head, recounting every foul phrase she’d ever
heard Jaken utter about humanity in general, silently praying that he wouldn’t choose this
moment to abandon her entirely, leaving her to dwindle and wilt away like so many other
uncared for things left on the forest floor.
It was . . . strange how these doubts had crept into the corners of her mind. Not once in
her youth did she think her lord capable of such cruelty and indifference, but . . .
Rin sighed.
When she was twelve and he’d had to leave her in the village because she was sick . . .
People would talk, and being so weak from battling the illness, she had no choice but to listen.
They kept commenting on how “odd” it was that he kept a human child in his care. Over and
over again, she listened as they told tales of his attack on the village so many years ago. They
talked of his hatred of his hanyou brother, the “distaste” he had for those possessing mortal
blood. She also learned that his brother had been the one to remove his left arm.
“He always thought he was so high and mighty,” she’d heard InuYasha say. “Too good
to even breathe the same air as me. Keh, look at him, now, traveling around with a human girl in
tow. And where does he bring her when she gets sick? To me, of all the nerve.”
“I don’t like it,” Kohaku’s sister had said. “What does he want with her? What’s he
doing with her? It just isn’t . . . right. That monster with that child. You don’t think he’s . . .”
He’s what? Rin had wondered, her eyelids too heavy to lift. She stayed in a room
separate from the others, her futon canopied with some clear, hard but flexible covering of some
sort. Plastic, she believed InuYasha’s mate had called it. And there was a tube attached to a
metal cylinder of some sort that fed air into her tent-like environment . . . oxygen, the woman
called it. It had reminded Rin of a snake, though, its quiet hiss filling the screened off room,
luring her into a dreamless trance so her lungs could clear and her body could recover.
“No!” the miko quickly countered.
“I’m not so sure,” Rin heard another voice say. She believed it was the monk, Kohaku’s
brother-in-law. She’d seen him when her lord had first brought her in. “The girl is quite
attractive, and she’s already begun developing.”
Developing? Rin thought. Developing into what?
“The swell of her chest, the span of her hips . . .” The monk was cut off by a loud thud!
“Dear, Sango,” he then continued, contrition evident in his tone. “I meant no offense.
One only has to have eyes to see that the girl is quickly becoming a woman.”
“Which is what worries me,” the slayer replied. “That murderous creature traveling with
that innocent, little girl.”
“Again, Sango, I must disagree. The thinning of her face, her increased stature, that
smooth, creamy flesh . . .” This time the sound was more of a clunk than a thud.
“My dearest wife,” he began again, “I’m simply saying the girl would be more
appropriately referred to as a young woman.”
Woman? Her? That was silly. She wasn’t exactly “little” any more, but . . .
“He can’t be trusted,” Sango said. “You can’t trust a youkai male around a human
female. They don’t and won’t take ‘no’ for an answer.”
It sounded as if two people cleared their throats.
“I beg your pardon, InuYasha and Kagome, but full-blooded youkai are decidedly
different from hanyou. When their instincts kick in, they don’t have a human heart to counteract
the call to their baser needs. A viable mate is a viable mate, whether she’s willing or not. That
poor girl wouldn’t stand a chance against him. He’d likely split her in two.”
Split her in two? What in the name of the gods were they talking about?
InuYasha scoffed. “A human is not a viable mate. He’d sooner let it fall off than bed
down with someone beneath his station.”
“Her station won’t matter once her cycle starts. Her body will cry out to be impregnated,
and his body will respond.”
“Feh, and sire a bastard hanyou? Not fucking likely.”
The hut fell silent for a moment.
“Maybe he’ll leave her here, then.” The miko’s voice was small, but sure.
“Or perhaps we should make her stay,” the slayer added.
Leave her here? Make her stay? The hissing seemed to grow louder as Rin’s eyes
watered, cool tears overflowing onto her fevered cheeks. But he promised he’d be back. He
promised he wouldn’t leave her. He promised she could stay with him as long as she liked.
And he always kept his promises. Always.
And they couldn’t make her stay here! She was only here because she was sick, because
her lord didn’t know about human medicines. He didn’t know how to help her, and so he’d taken
her to someone who did.
He’d carried her into this hut, he’d laid her on the futon, and he’d told her not to cry.
He’d told her to conduct herself like a proper lady, he’d said these people would make her better,
and he’d be back as soon as she was well.
And they weren’t going to let her leave? They were going to keep her? They wouldn’t
let him come for her? Because she was a “young woman?” Because her lord couldn’t “be
trusted?” Because she’d cry to be impregnated and he’d “split her in two?”
What was wrong with these people!
They were making her break her word to her lord. She’d promised not to cry, and she
hadn’t until they’d started with their horrible, horrible tales.
“Kagome.”
“Yes, Inuyasha?”
“I think you should go check on the kid.”
She began to cry in earnest at that point, her already aching chest heaving with her sobs,
her body wracked with an uncontrollable coughing fit, blood and mucous expelled from her
mouth into her cupped hands. That “plastic” cutting her off from the rest of the world, that evil,
evil hissing sound from the “oxygen.”
Why did her lord bring her here? Why did he leave her behind? She–she would have
rather died by his side then endure more of these people’s . . . “treatment.”
The screen to her room slid open, letting in a wide vee of light from the other room.
“Don’t touch me!” she screamed between coughs, her arms weakly flailing in front of her
face. “I want . . . I want m–my lord!”
She wailed and she screamed, she fought and she coughed. She cried for him time and
time again, but he didn’t come for her. He didn’t visit her once while she was there.
Three full cycles of the moon without her Lord Sesshomaru . . .
Rin sniffed back tears, a warm spring breeze blowing through her hair. It was silly to get
so upset about things that happened so long ago. She was 12 then and very nearly 30 now.
Much had changed in the past 18 years.
When her lord returned for her–yes, they let her leave with him–she silently swore to
never leave his side again. Such strange things happened to her when he wasn’t around. A few
days later, after she’d calmed down, and the fever broke, allowing her to think more clearly, she
listened as the miko and the slayer told her everything they knew about being a woman. She’d
woken up in the middle of the previous night feeling wetness between her legs. At first, much to
her humiliation, she thought she’d peed herself, unable to make it to the chamber pot, or “bed
pan,” as the miko had called it. She had felt that odd cramping sensation she got when she held
it too long . . . But feelings of embarrassment were quickly replaced with horror when she pulled
her top sheet back to reveal her bloodstained yukata and bedding.
She’d made such a mess! And blood was so hard to get out . . .
She wasn’t so naive as to think she was “dying” from such a small amount of blood. She
had seen her own blood before, and even though it was coming from quite an . . . unconventional
location, now, it was still her blood. She wasn’t wounded, she didn’t feel the pain of an injury,
so she set about her task as usual.
When you made a mess, you had to clean it up. And she was especially aware of how
people hated to have their nice things ruined. She forced her aching body to move, her lungs to
function as they should, her eyes to stay open.
She had to make this all disappear before someone saw what a horrible houseguest she
was and . . .
She swallowed hard. They were already contemplating keeping her from her lord, and
while she couldn’t imagine a fate worse than that, she was almost certain these people could.
She pushed herself to a seated position and pulled back the “plastic,” ignoring the quiet
hiss of the “oxygen.” But before she could scoot herself off of the futon and onto the floor, the
screen to her room slid open. Apparently, InuYasha had told his mate to “check on the kid”
again.
Rin apologized profusely for ruining her futon and promised she’d make it up to her any
way she could if she promised not to tell her lord that she’d made such an awful mess.
The miko told her there was nothing to apologize for, then she left and returned with a
basin of warm water, a clean yukata and Kohaku’s sister.
Rin felt a chill shoot down her spine. She wasn’t sure why, but she didn’t like the monk’s
wife. Maybe it was because of what she was; she was a youkai exterminator, and her lord and
two traveling companions were, indeed, youkai. Or perhaps it was because of all the mean things
she’d said about her lord being untrustworthy and wanting to “split her in two.” Or maybe it was
because she was the one who’d first suggested keeping her here . . .
After they’d changed her bedding and gotten cleaned up, they began explaining about
what it meant to be a “woman.”
The miko told her she was “blossoming.” This change in her body would be followed by
more changes–some physical and some emotional. She’d meet a handsome young man one day,
and they’d fall in love and want to get married and have children.
“I already have a handsome, young man,” she replied calmly.
“Oh?” the slayer asked.
“Lord Sesshomaru. I love him, and he said I could stay with him as long as I liked.”
The slayer frowned.
“That’s not really what I meant, Rin.”
“Oh?” she asked the miko.
“I meant someone your own age.”
“Does it matter so much that he’s older than me?” she asked. “I don’t remember them
very well any more, but I clearly recall my father being older than my mother. And isn’t
InuYasha older than you? And the monk older than you?” She turned to face each woman
individually as she mentioned their mates.
“That’s not the point,” the slayer nearly spat out. “He’s a demon lord, and you’re . . .”
Rin stared at her waiting for her to finish her sentence. “I’m what?” she asked, genuinely
curious.
The slayer then went on to tell her side of things. Instead of love, marriage and children,
she spoke of violence, rape, dominance and submission.
Now it was Rin’s turn to frown. Who was this woman to think she knew her lord so
well? Who was she to presume to know anything about the two of them at all?
Sweet, innocent, young, naive. Vicious, cunning, devious and conniving.
Yes. She was young, and she didn’t proclaim to be the most experienced individual, but
she did know enough about the world to know that her lord would never harm her under any
circumstances. He’d saved her far too many times, putting his own life at risk for her sake to
give that ridiculous hypothesis any merit.
Maybe . . . maybe he wouldn’t marry her, and she wouldn’t bear him any sons, but he
certainly wouldn’t do the types of things the slayer was suggesting. In fact, she felt more
threatened by the slayer and her companions than she’d ever felt traveling with Jaken, Ah-Un and
her lord.
“Is there something wrong, Rin?”
She shook her head at the miko, still keeping her eyes trained on the slayer. “I’m just
tired. I think I’ll go back to sleep now.”
“Of course,” Kagome nodded.
Both women rose to their feet, again leaving Rin alone.
She really hated being alone, but was quickly finding it preferable to being in the slayer’s
company.
In two weeks, Kagome took the “oxygen” away, and Rin was finally allowed to get out of
bed. She still wasn’t capable of eating solid food, but at least, now, she could eat her soup at the
low table with the others instead of on a tray in her room. And, of course, she still missed her
lord, but until she completely recovered and the cold season passed, she knew the chances of
seeing him were slim and none. He said he’d be back as soon as she was well, and the miko said
if she were to leave now, she could have a “relapse,” meaning he’d just have to bring her right
back here, and she’d have to have more “oxygen.” So, if staying here awhile longer meant that
she’d never have to come back, then so be it.
Kohaku was nice to her, at least, and so were Shippo and Kagome. InuYasha never came
closer to her than he absolutely had to, and Sango was gradually giving her some much needed
distance. The monk though . . .
He gave her the funniest feeling in the pit of her stomach. And watching the slayer
watching him as he watched her, only made the feeling worse.
8 8 8
“She can’t have children,” Kohaku quietly explained to her as they took their fourth walk
through the village that day. It was finally spring, and her thirteenth birthday was fast
approaching. She was completely cured and back to her old self. Kohaku was three years her
senior and preparing to go out on his first “official” solo demon hunt.
“Oh?” Rin asked. In all honesty, she wasn’t paying much attention to the bronze-skinned
young man; she was much too intent on spying a head of silver hair and a set of golden eyes. The
village was busy, buzzing with activity–farmers planning to sow their fields; women tending to
their children and doing the wash by the river; young women who’d come of age during the
winter, talking over marriage prospects with other girls their age, throwing sly glances at some of
the men as they made their way to the river to fish.
“No,” Kohaku said. “She was nearly mortally wounded in the final with Naraku. He
impaled her right through the stomach. If Kagome hadn’t purified his shouki, she would’ve died.
As it stands, she’s just infertile. All her insides are messed up.”
“But the monk married her, anyway.”
He nodded. “He’d said they’d been through too much together to just throw it all away.
Even if she couldn’t bear his children, he decided to stay by her.” The young brunette gave a
somewhat sad chuckle. “If you knew how he used to be . . .”
“Used to be?” As they passed through the village, dark head after dark head, she was still
hopeful to see a glimmer of white.
His laugh became louder, more genuine. “He used to ask every woman he met if she’d
bear his child.”
“Is that supposed to be funny?” Rin asked.
“It was, considering he was a Buddhist monk.”
Rin shook her head. “And she claims my lord is immoral.”
“Y-you’re not really in love with him, are you?”
Rin sighed. “Not you, too. I thought we understood each other.”
“We do! We do. We really do.”
“Then why did you ask me that?” They were now on the outskirts of the village about to
enter the forest.
“But . . . don’t you want a normal life? Don’t you want to get married and have children
and . . . be happy?”
“Being with him makes me happy.”
“But he’ll never want you like that. He’s a demon. Demons like him want to be with
other demons.”
Rin shrugged as they passed beneath the budding branches of the trees above. His sister
seemed to think differently.
“You’ll just be wasting your life. Do you think that’s what your parents would’ve
wanted?”
She stopped in her tracks and put on a sad smile; Kohaku stopped with her. “They
would’ve wanted me to be happy. Just as I’m sure your parents wanted you to be happy.”
“You make me happy, Rin.”
She started slightly at his admission, but continued to smile. “It’s good that you’re happy.
You didn’t seem very happy the last time I saw you.”
“No,” he shook his head. “No, I wasn’t.” He’d told her the whole story about Naraku
and the jewel shard, dying then being revived to serve his purposes. He’d told her everything his
lord had made him do, all the people he’d had to kill, all the times he’d hurt his sister or her
friends . . . even the time he’d kidnaped her. He’d killed men, women and children; human,
youkai and animals; the old, the young, the crippled–even members of his own family, his own
village.
It didn’t matter. His only tie to this world was the jewel shard in his back, and his lord
had ultimate control over that dark power. If his lord said “kill,” he killed. And though his Lord
Naraku was no longer in this life, the shard was still very much part of his body, and people
feared him because of it.
Who was to say some other powerful demon wouldn’t come along and try to take control
of him?
Even after all he’d done to redeem himself, no one trusted him–not in their homes, not
around their farms, and certainly not around their daughters.
“Rin?”
“Hmmm?” Even while thinking about Kohaku, her eyes were still set on finding
Sesshomaru.
“Why aren’t you afraid of me?”
She laughed, and it felt good. She hadn’t laughed in a good, long while. “Because you’re
a good person, Kohaku. You didn’t mean to hurt anybody. And because you know how much
you hurt them, you’ll never do it again.” She rested her hand on his upper arm. “You told me
how bad that made you feel, right?”
The young man nodded, his eyes seemingly fixed on the spot where her fingers met his
flesh. He never wore sleeves in the warm weather, but Rin pretended not to notice.
“Well, that just proves it. Bad people don’t feel bad about the bad things they do. You’re
really a good person, Kohaku.”
“Rin . . .”
“What?” she smiled.
She was too . . . inexperienced at the time to recognize that deep, needful look in his eyes,
that rough, raw edge to his voice. All she saw was Kohaku–the formerly freckled-face boy
who’d saved her from being eaten by a cave full of hungry demons. All she heard was her name
being called by that of an old friend.
She’d had no idea he was going to kiss her. But he did . . . and she just stood there. Her
hand tightened around his bicep, her eyes wide in surprise as Kohaku pressed his lips to hers, his
eyes closed, his hands resting on the tops of her shoulders. He was more than a head taller than
she was.
She didn’t know how long they stayed like that, or why she didn’t immediately hit him
the way Kagome and the slayer seemed to hit their mates any time they tried to touch them, but
she did seem to recall her eyes drifting closed and her mouth losing some of its resistance.
That’s how it was done, after all. You weren’t supposed to kiss someone with your eyes
open. All the stories she’d ever heard and even the tales that the miko told her, always had the
boy and the girl closing their eyes as they leaned in close, their hands reaching for each other . . .
But that was all she knew on the subject, and she certainly wasn’t prepared for that odd
thing he did with his tongue . . . not at that time, anyway.
She immediately recoiled, and Kohaku took a step away from her.
“Wh–why did you do that?” Her vision was dazed, her cheeks burned and . . . there was
an odd stirring in the pit of her stomach.
“Didn’t you like it?” he asked.
“I . . .” she shook her head to clear her thoughts. “I love him, Kohaku. I’m going to stay
with him. I don’t care if it’s not ‘normal’ or . . .” Why did he have to do that? Why did she have
to . . . like it? Why . . .
“It’s okay,” he finally said, breaking eye contact with her. “I . . . I hope I’m wrong about
him, Rin, if only for your sake. If . . . if anyone deserves to be happy it’s you.”
Her lord’s voice pulled her back to present events. “How long will you continue to
mourn for him?”
She looked up from Jaken’s grave, her hands giving the flowers one final adjustment as a
sad smile settled upon her face. “As long as I live,” she said.
Her lord nodded in acknowledgment then turned away from her. “It is time we were on
our way.”
Rin nodded, pushing herself up from the kneeling position, smoothing her kimono back
into place. It was her birthday, and he always made sure her birthdays were special.
888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888
Commentary Corner: Even though it won’t matter beyond this chapter, the well still works andAFF.NET – I can’t complain about my seven reviews ^ ^
Thank you:youkai tsuki–It’s good to hear from you again. I DO try to be different, and I’m glad youWhile AFF and its agents attempt to remove all illegal works from the site as quickly and thoroughly as possible, there is always the possibility that some submissions may be overlooked or dismissed in error. The AFF system includes a rigorous and complex abuse control system in order to prevent improper use of the AFF service, and we hope that its deployment indicates a good-faith effort to eliminate any illegal material on the site in a fair and unbiased manner. This abuse control system is run in accordance with the strict guidelines specified above.
All works displayed here, whether pictorial or literary, are the property of their owners and not Adult-FanFiction.org. Opinions stated in profiles of users may not reflect the opinions or views of Adult-FanFiction.org or any of its owners, agents, or related entities.
Website Domain ©2002-2017 by Apollo. PHP scripting, CSS style sheets, Database layout & Original artwork ©2005-2017 C. Kennington. Restructured Database & Forum skins ©2007-2017 J. Salva. Images, coding, and any other potentially liftable content may not be used without express written permission from their respective creator(s). Thank you for visiting!
Powered by Fiction Portal 2.0
Modifications © Manta2g, DemonGoddess
Site Owner - Apollo