Adult-FanFiction.org : Inuyasha / Yashahime

Enamored	By : Maddiesan Category: InuYasha > Het - Male/Female > Kouga/Kagome Views: 13037 -:- Recommendations : 1 -:- Currently Reading : 4
Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha, and I do not make any money from these writings

Chapter List
- 22
- 23
- 24
Chapter 23: One Moment
A thin strip of light was emerging through the darkness of the cave. It was warm, its color resembling a burnt orange as it warmed the brown furs that covered the ground. Kagome was the first to stir, the deep light pulling her from the arms of her slumbers. She winced, a wasteful attempt to remain asleep, but the light was too much for her to bear. Her blue eyes flashed upon, her surroundings nothing more than a blur mirage. She tried to stretch her neck but she found that a strong hold was keeping her lock in place. She managed to trail her hand down, only to realize it was not resting upon soft furs. Instead, her hand was trailing down some very hard and defined abs. Abs that belonged to Kouga. His tan skin came into view and she felt a burning spread to her cheeks.
He was nearly bare his strong body held up against hers. His own hands were resting on the crest of her naked back, protecting her from any danger that might come. Her kimono was nothing more than a discarded piece of clothing that hung from her hips. She remembered the warmth that had spread through her body when he had once again made her reach the heavens. The memory was enough to ignite her face with shame. Oh god, once again she had let herself fall prey to the pleasures that he could offer her. She remembered the heaviness of her body afterwards and the tiredness that had claimed her. She could not quite recall how tangled up their bodies had been once she succumbed to the sleep, but judging from their current position, they had been quite close.
Despite the fact that she was moving and stirring, Kouga remained sound asleep. He was so trusting in her presence that he could remain dormant while she was moving. He trusted her so much… Not that she would ever hurt him but his feelings for her… they were so pure, so vivid. Sometimes, thinking about it, her heart would soar. Her heart was pounding in her chest but she ignored it as she buried her shame covered face in his side. How could she even look at him after this? Any of the words she had used in the past to turn him down meant nothing… because anytime he spoke to her or touched her, she caved in. How could she still claim to have lingers of love for Inuyasha when here she was…bare chested, tangled up in his body?
Was she lying to him, or was she lying to herself?
Her body trembled as she let a sigh pass her dry, cracked lips. Her life was quickly becoming a train wreck and she had to regain control over it… over herself. She needed to start facing the facts.
She liked him.
If she did not, she would not let him do all this to her.
She needed him.
If she did not, she would never find herself trusting him so much, and needing his presence.
But it scared her to admit these things. After all, it all made her life so much more complicated. She had feelings for Inuyasha. Or at least, she knew for a fact that at one point, she did. Also, Inuyasha was tied in with the jewel and he could travel to her time… and… and Kouga had none of these things. She never liked to think about what would happen once the jewel was back into one piece but… but one of the possibilities was that she would be returned to her time. Nobody here belonged in the modern era. And if she was honest with herself, she did not belong in the past. She liked it, and she had started to make a life for herself here… but it was not her time. What if, once it was all over, everything was ripped from her?
Did she truly want to invest herself even more in something that she could not have?
Perhaps it was why it was easier loving Inuyasha. He loved Kikyo. He wanted to die for Kikyo. Even if she were to never see him again, she knew that for him his one true love was Kikyo and he was never going to forget her. Things were different when it came down to Kouga. He only had eyes for her, he only wanted her. Not only would it hurt to know she would never see him again but she always knew that it was going to break his heart. If she gave in, if she let herself get lost within him, she would only hurt him more. Had he not lost enough? What if she gave in and for the first time let her feelings completely guide her? He would end up even more broken.
She knew he did not care. She knew he would take whatever she gave him. And that made everything even more complicated.
She could not.
She had to prevent herself from diving in further.
And yet, despite how many she told herself that she would not hurt him, that she would spare him the pain, she still gave in every time.
She had no control over this.
"Hey Kouga."
At the sound of the foreign voice interrupting their quietness, she stiffened. It would not have been that bad had she not reminded herself that her chest was bare for all to see. She was about to yelp and grab whatever was around to cover herself and her indecency when something was much quicker than she was. Before the air could even leave her lungs, she felt herself being spun around and her back smacked against the ground. Suddenly there was a hard, warm body squishing her breasts down, covering her tiny frame. A growl echoed in her ears, and she realized that Kouga had managed to flip her and cover her before anyone could enter the cave.
The only problem? He was not quite happy about the intrusion.
His entire body was tensed up and from the angle she was laying, she could see the tip of his fangs threatening to break the sensitive membrane of his lips. His weight was nearly knocking the air out of her lungs but she did not dare to move.
"Kouga - I…"
Ginta did not need to see the full scene to understand what he had walked in on. After all, there was only one reason for his leader's instincts to go on overdrive like this. He was protecting Kagome. He had smell the scents - so had everyone - but those were from last night. He did not think he would walk in on anything. He also did not expect Kouga to not be aware of his arrival. He was usually on the look out for any shift or presence. It seemed that having Kagome near had allowed him to obtain the full rest that he so desperately needed. Not matter how much of a good thing that was, the situation as not ideal for Ginta. He knew better than to challenge his alpha. He slowly walked away, never turning his back on them, and he made sure to be as quiet as possible.
Once the cave was completely empty, and there was no more risk to the purity and shame of the tiny woman that was beneath him, Kouga's muscles finally released the tension that had been vibrating through them. Kagome saw his arms buckle and then, he snaked his nose through her hair, as though her scent could be used to calm him. Kouga let out the breath he did not know he had been holding and held back another growl. It had all happened so fast that he was not convinced he was awake for it all. He had heard the voice, the footsteps, and it had torn him from his slumber. Something in the back of his brain remembered how disrobed she had been when she had fallen asleep against his body. He imagined she had not dressed herself in the middle of the night and he had simply launched himself at her, hoping to preserve her dignity.
He also did not want another pair of eyes on what was his.
She might not be officially his, but she would always hold his heart and for him, that was that held the same significance.
His heartbeat was finally slowly down, and once he felt he regained enough control, he regretfully tore his body from hers. Already he missed her warmth and the softness of her skin. Kagome remained locked in her position for a few beats, making sure all was well, before detaching her body from the fur. Now that he was awake, she was more easily embarrassed and her first instinct was to reach out for her kimono. She sluggishly lifted the sleeves, covering her breasts from his sight. It would be easier to have a conversation if she was dressed. When she was distracted enough, her state of clothing apparently did not bother her, but at the moment she was far from being distracted.
Initiating a conversation with him was difficult. Each time she tried to meet his eyes, she felt herself shy away. She had to look down at her own hands if she wanted to focus enough to begin a conversation.
"Kouga…" Saying his name, that was a good start right?
All she had said was his name and yet he already knew what turn this conversation was going to turn. His blood was still pumping from the invasion from a few minutes ago, and his instincts were prickling to the surface. Perhaps he could use that rush of adrenaline to his advantage? Usually he was so terrified of spooking her or scaring her away. And yet, so far, nothing had worked to chase her away. He might be playing it more safe than he had to - after all, had he not taste her body many times by now?
He decided to go for it. He leaned forward, surprising her and earning a yelp, before resting his lips upon her neck. One kiss. Two kisses. He trailed his way to her ear where his warm breath was sending tingles down her spine. "Kagome."
She shivered. Fuck. She had to keep her composure. But unfortunately for her, her body remembered what he could do it and she found herself leaning into to him. Focus Kagome, focus. She inhaled deeply, hoping it would bring some serenity to her mind. It did not.
"Kouga - I, I think we should talk." Those were the proper words to say right?
Every time they talked he did not feel as though it ended well for him. He believed he could distract her but he did not know how much he could push her and get away with it. "Kagome, we have talked."
He was not wrong. "I know, but, I just -" She could not really share with him all the conclusions she came to reveal by herself. He would not like most of them. She felt an ache in her chest as she thought about all that could be and what could not be. Did she really know? And how long would it take to complete the jewel really? Plus, the well worked before it was shattered right? It might just keep working. Perhaps all it needed was to be activated and now that it was, it could be used. Although, it came back to the same problem. Kouga could still not cross over. Perhaps there was a way for her to find how he could do it? But was it even worth the heartache? She already felt pain when she fell in love with Inuyasha.
Did she want to put herself through that one more time? Did she want another heartache?
At the thoughts, her eyes filled with tears that she was trying to hold back. But she failed miserably. As soon as the scent of saltiness tickled Kouga's nostrils, he cupped her face with his hands, forcing her to look at her. It could not possibly be his fault that she was shedding tears was she? He had not said much and he had done much worse! Panic filled his rapidly beating heart and he searched her face for any kind of answers. Unfortunately for him he did not find any.
"Kagome?" Words of apology were burning his lips but he held them back. Before blabbering like an idiot, he wanted to find the problem.
She could not help but chuckle. "I'm an idiot," she responded as she wiped away some of the tears that were leaking down her cheeks.
He brushed his thumb across her face, wiping away what he could. "Kagome, you're amazing."
Despite his hold on her face she shook her head. "I really am not." She failed more than she cared to admit and in her recklessness she had affected a lot of lives. When she had first gotten here, she did not realize the impact she could have. She knew nothing of this era and it was not hers. But now? Now that she had a life here, it weighted on her even more. She ruined this place, she ruined this time. If she had not fallen down the well, everyone's life would be fine.
Sango's life would be fine. Her family would be alive. Shippo's dad would be alive. But… but Inuyasha would still be pinned to a tree. But Kouga would have his tribe. They only died as collateral damage in the hunt for the jewel shards.
And Kouga's legs would be fine.
"I mess up a lot," she said between sobs.
"Kagome, you kinda changed my life." He thought he knew where he was heading or what his life would be like. But he was wrong. She changed the way he behaved, the way he hunted… heck even the way he ate. She changed his whole life. She showed him a better way, a kinder way. He would never have this vision of life if it were not for her.
"I cost you half your tribe."
"You didn't do that. He did." His nostrils flared. "Never put his sins on ya, got it?" Sometimes, the alpha in him got the best out of him. And he was always too protective of her. He was from the moment he met her.
"Kouga…"
"No."
"Listen…"
"No."
There was nothing to listen to because whatever she was going to say he was not going to like. Plus, it was not going to be true. Why could she not see herself the way he saw her?
"You're the reason I'm alive." He leaned forward and he pressed a kiss on the tip of her nose. "The reason I breathe." A kiss on her forehead. "My life is this great, 'cause of ya." A kiss on the cheek. "Ya made me better. I wanna do better." The other cheek. "I need ya." And… he finished with a kiss on the lips.
He could lighten the load on her shoulders with a simple kiss. He could make her want to forget it all. And she really wanted to do that but the more she did it, the more she let him on. The more he could lose himself in her as well. And had she not decided that she would not let it happen?
"Kouga."
He knew she wanted it. Why did she keep stopping it? It was not like he was pushing her in something that she did not want. She did. But she kept turning him around. "Why not?"
He pulled himself from her and stared right into her eyes. He was putting her on the stop and he was hating himself for that but he did not see any other way to do it. He wanted to know why she could not let herself fall into this. Why some moments were okay and others were not. He knew that she had only promised to try but - had they not gone beyond that? He knew he was a little hot headed and reckless when it came to Kagome but he knew he was not wrong about this. He could not be.
As his blue eyes shone while he stared into her soul, she found herself speechless. What was she supposed to answer him? Was she supposed to tell him that the uncertainty of the future was stopping her? That she did not want to hurt him? Because she knew that no matter what she told him, he would dismiss it. He would say that he did not care, that he would not let the unknown stop him from loving her. And she did admire that devotion, that need for her. So why could she not let go? She always held on. To things, to people, to feelings.
But could she do that?
Could she let it all go for this moment?
A moment that might mean more for one of them?
Then again, when had she ever been sure of anything? She had always tried her best - and failed… or sometimes she succeeded.
Resignation shook through her body and she launched herself forward. It was one of those rare occasions where she was the one leading the interaction. She let herself get lost in the feel of his lips. She tasted the savor of his mouth, the scent of fresh dirt and pine trees that coated every inch of him. She plastered her hands over his cheeks, holding him in place. She did not know why she feared he might run away; if there was one person who would never leave her behind, it was him. No matter what, he would be there. He did not care about the cost. He put her first. Even before his own life.
How could she not be overwhelmed by this?
He did not know how a simple question turned into this but he was not about to complain. He was not tricking her into this, he did not force her into this. It was rare for her to be the one to seek physical comfort from him but he was not about to deny her what she sought. He wrapped his arms around her tiny frame and pressed up her warm body against his. The taste of her was enough to make him dizzy - it also allowed him to push aside the pain that was throbbing through his legs. There was no amount of pain that would make him stop this moment. Anything he could get from her, he would. Her fingers found their way through his hair, messing up the locks, massaging his scalp.
Her body was still tingly from the ministrations of the night before. It was not hard for her to react to his touch. Already her silk kimono was sticking to her damp skin and there was a voice in her brain begging her to shed it. Of course, she would not simply drop it but the idea was tempting. His large hands palmed her back, sliding down the fabric. Once he took hold of her rear, he used his new found grip to lay her down on the ground, hovering himself on top of her. It might look like a position of dominance and in a way it was but… it was mostly because it was a lot more comfortable for his legs. He could tolerate the pain much longer in this position.
Once Kouga was done devouring her mouth, he focused his attention on her neck. He now had a much better access to his prize. His lips left a trail of warmth and stickiness all the way from her ear to the beginning of her heaving breasts. Every time he moved lower she seemed to be hold her breath. And yet that did not stop her fingers from working their way down. She was now gripping at his shoulders as though she feared he might pull away from her; as if that was ever going to happen. She had barely pull on her kimono before and it was quite easy to make it fall apart again. As soon as he raised his hands to caress her chest, it opened up for him. He buried his nose between them, one of his hands gently teasing one of her nipples. She arched her back, pushing herself more into him.
His head was basking in a daze of her. He had tasted her before and the simple spike in her scent was enough to remind his mouth of her taste. He wanted all of her. He wanted to do more than taste her this time. He could already feel the aching spreading to his hardening cock. How could handle as much teasing as he had to but he would be lying if he said it was not getting harder. His cock would sprung to life at the mere sight of her and the fact that she was allowing him to touch her so freely was not making this any easier.
Her hands were everywhere, her skin was on fire and she could barely find a way to catch her breath. She did not even know how there were more ways for him to triggered a reaction out of her body. It felt like he had explored everything already and yet every time he laid a hand on her she shivered with anticipation. She found herself licking her lips as he kissed his way to her navel. He had already tasted her yesterday. He was not sure if her need for him was for him to repeat his previous actions or for him to do more than he had before. She did not leave many clues for him. Regardless, he spread her kimono completely open, revealing her whole body to him.
A tingle traveled to his cock and he found that the hardness was too much for him to handle. He raised himself to her eye level again, pressing a kiss to the side of her jaw. With this new position, she was able to feel full force his hard cock pressing against her wet entrance. The only one who had a clothing barrier was him and it was nothing more than furs. She could almost completely feel the head pressing against her, wanting to plunge itself inside of her. The pulsing of her heart was radiating through her core and suddenly her throat clammed up. What did she expect out of their kiss? Why did she kiss him? Did she only want him to touch her like he had done so many times before?
Had she wanted to lose herself with him?
This was insane.
It had to be insane.
Nobody did this. Then again, nobody had her life either. Was it wrong and crazy that she laid completely bare beneath a man who would die for her? Actually he was not even a man, he was more than that. Although she had not known him for the longest of times, circumstances had caused them to get close quite rapidly. He did make her heart beat faster. He did pull her out of a darkness she thought would never end. And she had been trying to do the same for him. But this was not what this was about. She was not in this position to make him feel better.
She had ended up in this position out of her own free will.
And now, as he was peppering every inch of her skin with kisses, she knew he was waiting for her approval. He wanted a sign that would tell him what he was allowed to do. Because it was obvious where he could go. His thick hardness kept being thrusted into her, teasing her with promises of what it could give her. And she was tempted. But was it too much? Was it offering him more than she could give?
Unconsciously, she began to roll her hips against him and it was like someone was torturing him to death. He would always respect her, he would always wait for her but…She was not making it easy on him. The scents were swimming in his head, his instincts were clawing at him and he was using whatever control he had left to keep the beast roaring inside of him at bay. Regardless, he moved his own hips against her, and then he listened as she made the most beautiful sounds he had ever heard. She was moaning, she was panting, and it was all because of him and no one else. He was the first one to arise all these reactions out of her and it was hard to drop the pride associated with that.
It was not too long before her hip thrusts were more demanding and he wanted nothing more than to give in. He was lapping at her neck, tasting the saltiness that was accumulating on her skin. She became damped, sweat beads rolling down her back as she was arching her back and demanding more than she might want.
"Kagome…" his voice was a throaty whisper, and he was on the verge of begging.
He would stop if she wanted him to stop but she had to ask him to stop soon. If he did not pull away in the next few seconds, he might enter the territories of non return. She did not want that. She would never want that.
She was shaking her head but she was not actually saying anything. The word he was probably looking for was no, but she did not even know how to say no to him. Because she needed this perhaps just as much as he needed it. Her body was throbbing and for the first time, she felt like she was the star of the show. He only had eyes for her, he only wanted her. He was willing to do and give as much as she would let him. He respected her. And oh god. Who knew one could feel this much. Who knew that one caress could ignite her whole body? She wanted to be logical, she wanted to think it through but her brain was far too turned off for her to process this. Was it wrong that she wanted to feel more?
Death nearly claimed her and then her world fell apart.
For the first time since the attack, things made sense.
"Please." A begging moan was her answer.
At first, Kouga thought he hallucinated it. He thought perhaps he imagined as her lips moved and begged him for a sweet relief. But, he had not. It was real. Kagome was asking him for more. And he would give her everything that he had. His soul included.
-E-
Food? Was he supposed to bring her food? Fuck, he could not even take care of himself. Now he had to help her. He never thought it would happen. He had wanted it obviously but he never thought he would actually obtained it. His life had gone down a rather dark path lately and he had given up on anything good ever happening to him again. He had also found an increased need for revenge. But, she offered him everything. The hardest part had been to not sink his teeth in her neck. He had wanted to but that was nothing something he could do because she had begged him for more. It torn him apart that despite claiming her body he was not able to claim her. The wolf inside of him was not happy.
But he could not screw this up.
As a matter of fact he might already be screwing it up by nothing being by her side. What if she awoke while he was attempting to fetch food for her? At the moment, he wished he had his legs so that he could rapidly obtain what he needed. But that was a thing of the past. Now, he was a limping idiot. Although the little encounter with Kagome seemed to have recharged him. He had managed to rise by himself and he was -slowly- walking out of the cave. Perhaps there was something about her energy and her aura that helped him.
He hoped so.
If he wanted to have a fighting chance with her, he needed to recover.
"Boss?"
His ears perked up at the sound of voices and that same protective instinct rose inside of him. He was prepared to face an idiot but instead he found himself looking at four grinning wolves.
"What da ya what?"
"Is it done?"
"Is sis family now?"
"She's gonna stay with us?"
He sighed. "She ain't mine."
She was, but not in the wolf sense. It hurt his ego to admit it out loud but the idiots were putting him on the stop. Plus he did not want anyone to attack Kagome with questions she could not answer later. They had finally taken another step and he refused to regress with her.
"Oh."
"But we thought -"
"Didn't you?"
"We heard it…"
Yeah, that was another thing that he did not want them to share with her. She did not need a reminder of how sensitive youkais ears were. If she remembered, she might not want that to happen again. And he definitively wanted that to happen again.
"Listen, morons. She ain't mine yet, now fuck off will ya. I need to get her food before she wakes up."
Ginta was the first to gulp. He expected his alpha to be in a much better mood. Then again, he had also expected them to be mated. Why would Kouga not take this wonderful opportunity? He sighed. The least they could do now was help him help her. After all, they had seemed to ruin the mood with their questions. He casted a long glance at the cave where he could confirm that their future sister was still sleeping. Did Kouga not mess up by not going through with it? Sis hardly seemed like the unfaithful kind. Would she not expect a commitment out of him?
"We got some food," Hakkaku finally added.
They had planned for it to be more like some kind of celebration feast, but this could work as well. It was not exactly what they had in mind but they would work with what they were given. At least their alpha was happy. It was hard to see him in a good mood and they did not want to ruin it. If this was what they had to celebrate, they would.
"We'll bring it to the cave."
"Yeah, just make sure Sis is decent," Ginta teased.
Kouga glared at him, but the younger youkai just laughed it off. He knew he was treading in dangerous territories but he felt the need to lighten the heavy mood that had begun to surround them.
Kouga gave in and finally nodded. "None of you come in until I say so," he warned.
He could not look at it as him not providing. It was his tribe wanting to honor Kagome. Of course, he probably would not tell her that everyone had been waiting for her with food and offering. "Make sure no one says anything stupid yea?" He did not have enough time to make an official speech. He was already running against the clock. If prayed she would not wake up before he could wrap his arms around her once more.
"Got it boss," Ginta assured him.
Oh boy, did they have a lot of people to talk with about this.
He gulped.
Fuck.
"I'm warning ya," Kouga said as he leaned against the wall.
"On our way boss."
He watched them zip away, wishing he could do the same.
No, he would not focus on his legs. He would focus on the beautiful, naked woman lying in his cave.
And he would pray he did not fuck it all up.
-E-
- 22
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- 24
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