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In too deep
By : Pallas
Category: InuYasha > General
Views: 3689 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own InuYasha, nor make money from this story.
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A/N:
Thanks so much for all your lovely reviews! I only hope you will continue to
like this story!!

Oh, and I forgot something very
important; Disclaimer!!!! Here it is:

Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha! So, everybody�s happy now!
< !su !supportEmptyParas]>

In too deep

Chapter 3: Blow to the heart

Dusk was gone, and the night had fallen.
But the dark didn�t bother Kagome, perhaps because she didn�t really notice it.
She was lost in her thoughts, reliving her memories. Some of them happy, some
of them funny, most of them painful. It really made her wonder why she was
staying, and if it was worth it. Because she hated to admit it, but sometimes
she wondered if she just couldn�t go home, and forget about the Shikon no Tama,
to forget about Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru and to leave all her problems behind.

The things that kept her from doing just
that, were her friends, and the hate she carried for Naraku. And she wanted,
more than everything else, that the suffering of others, due to Naraku�s
unrelenting and ruthless quest for power, stopped. Whenever they came upon a
burnt down village, or a slaughtered human or youkai, her resolve to end this
strenghtened.

And perhaps, she wanted to
show those who thought so little of her that she wasn�t weak, that she didn�t
run away and that she could be useful. It was almost pathetic how much she
suffered under those remarks and beliefs about her. She almost started to
believe in them herself. Maybe she already did. Maybe, deep down, she had
always known they were telling the truth... But what could she do? She tried so
hard, and sometimes it was working; sometimes she managed to use her miko
abilities, to protect herself and her friends. But to actually kill another
living being... She didn�t know if she could do that. Somehow, she couldn�t bring
herself to harm another, save for protection. Somehow, it felt wrong to use her
powers for anything else. She could purify demons, although she would never
seek them out, to vanquish them. After all, not all of them were that bad...

She rested her weary head in
her hands. The smell of dinner started to make it�s way to her. She hadn�t
eaten since this morning, and she should feel hungry, but she didn�t. She
didn�t want to leave her musings. Maybe she could learn from the past. Never to
repeat it. Trying to avoid the mistakest sht she had made. Trying to avoid a
certain Demon Lord.

:1'> ****

Rain was falling down hard and when she
looked up towards the sky, it only promised more.. The water had drenched their
clothes, and chilled them to the bone. All were shivering, save Inuyasha, who
stubbornly walked along, ignoring the discomfort of his fellow travelers. He
had a purpose; another shard, somewhere in a deep forest. Kagome had come to
fear the woods; one would never know what lay hidden, waiting for the best
opportunity to attack. Kagome feared one more than all others, though shadn�adn�t seen him since their little fight four days ago. But she knew he would
come back. The Lord of the Western Lands didn�t take a defeat well. He would
come back and try to kill her again. She tried her hardest to never get
seperated from her companions, but sometimes it was unavoidable. Then, she
tried to return to safety as soon as possible. Perhaps, she was being too
cautious (if that was possible, in the Sengoku Jedai) as she didn�t know had
bad she had wounded him, so he could as well be still recuperating from his
wounds. But better safe than sorry, right?

�Inuyasha, we have to find
some form of shelter. Dusk is already setting in. Soon, we won�t be able to see
where we are going. And if we don�t get warm, we could catch a cold, and get
sick.�

�Stupid humans with their
pathetic eyesight and weak bearings!�

�Miroku has a point,
Inuyasha,� Kagome said quietly, �sick, we would be even more of a bother to
you,� her tone was slightly sarcastic. �There will be no traveling at all, till
that person gets better.�

�Are you trying to tell me
what to do, wench? I don�t need your advice!� He started to walk even faster,
until he was running at a slow pace. The others didn�t try to keep up with him,
too exhausted as they were. Soon, the hanyou was out of sight.

�Would you look at that?! He
knows we can�t keep up with him!!� Sango bristled.

�He�ll probably goewheewhere
and sit in a tree and sulk about how slow we are,� remarked Miroku dryly.

Kagome and Sango gave him a
weak smile at his attempt at humor.

�Come on guys, we have to
find some shelter. Maybe there will be a village up ahead.�

�I hope we�ll find something
soon. The rain isn�t letting up, and I�m afraid we�ll become lost in the
dark...� Miroku didn�t finish his story. Instead, he squinted his eyes, and
said then, exitedly: �I see something like a building! There, behind those
trees!�

As the others saw it too,
their spirits lifted somewhat, and they picked up their pace. Soon, they had
reached the building, which wasn�t more than an old, abandoned hut, but to
them, it was dry and warm.

A loud smack brought Kagome
back to the present. Miroku had tried to take advantage of the situation, and
started to make advances on Sango, who wore nothing more than a very large
shirt. They had to get dry, and Miroku surely enjoyed every second of Sango
wearing very little.

�Hentai!!� Sango screamed,
and proceeded to slap him once more. Kagome and Shippou smiled at their antics,
while Kirara seemed to shake her little head in exasperation. When would those
two admit that they liked eachother?

Eventually, the two
people-in-denial settled down and started to eat. As Kagome munched on the
Ramen, she was getting more and more uneasy. Where was he? She just couldn�t
get used to his constant disappearances. She hated it! She didn�t know where he
was going or what he was doing... or who he was seeing...

She put her empty plate down,
stood up and pulled her still damp jacket on.

�Where are you going?� Sango
asked curiously.

�I�m going to see if I can
find Inuyasha. The rain has almost stopped, so I thought that I could go and
see if he is near, and maybe if he wants something to eat, or if he wants to
talk, or maybe he just-�

�Kagome, stop it! You always
get worried sick about him, and he just isn�t worth it! He always vents his
anger on you, he never appreciates your concern, and he doesn�t care about the
hurt he inflicts on you whit his words! I say leave him be! Let him sulk! I bet
he still can�t deal with the fact that you bested his brother *twice* now! He
isn�t thinking about anyone else but himself, so let him stn hin his own
juiches!!�

Kagome flinched at the
mentioning of Inuyasha�s half-brother. Of course she ShipShippou had told them
about their run-in with Sesshomaru, and Shippou had been sure to tell them in
full detail how she had blasted the Demon Lord, without using her arrows. Her
friends had been worried and surprised of course, but Inuyasha had raced back
to the spot, to see if his brother was there, and maybe to confirm the story...
he just couldn�t believe the little snap of a girl could do that, again!

It had made him even more
crankier and sullen. It was unpleasanttravtravel with him during the day. At
night, he disappeared, leaving them alone. Sure, they could protect themselves,
but it kept Kagome out of her sleep. But now, she would just try to see if he
was maybe outside the shack, too proud to come inside, to admit he had been
wrong. She always was the one to take the first step, to admit she had been
wrong (even if that wasn�t the case...) It didn�t cost her much, except her
pride, maybe, and if she could make the situation between them a little
better... And that was all that mattered; how could they work together
efficiently, if they didn�t even talked with eachother? She had to be the grown
up person in this situation.

�I know that, Miroku, and
thanks... I won�t go far, just outside. I�m not so stupid to go for a walk in
the woods, you know. I don�t want to run into homicidal Demon half-brothers
again!� She let them believe her last encounter with Sesshomaru had been an
unfortunate coincide not not a visit with a deadly purpose!

�Kagome... All right, go
outside. You won�t be able to sleep otherwise.� At Kagome shocked face, Sango
smiled softly at her friend. �You thought we didn�t know? You don�t have to try
to hide it from us, Kagome. We know how you feel. You can talk with us, you
know. Maybe that will help you to... move on. Like Miroku said; he just isn�t
worthy of you worrying over him.�

�I wished it could be that
easy,� she whispered, and fled out of the cabin, before anyone could see her
tears. She took a few steps away from the door, even though she could barely
see a thing; the moon and stars were hidden by the thick layer of clouds. Not
the tiniest light could be spotted. The darkness seemed to engulf her, making
her shiver with the ominous feeling that hung in the air. Her shivers only
became worse when the cold merged with the wetness of her jacket. Maybe she
better got back inside.

�Inuyasha?� She said softly.
She waited patiently, hoping against better judgement that he was there,
sitting in a tree.

�Inuyasha? Are you there?�
She tried again. The forest stayed quiet. It was almost too quiet. Kagome
frowned. She was getting a real bad feeling, and was about to return to the
safety of the hut and the comfort of the warm fire, when she heard movement.

Hesitantly, she took a few
steps forward. �Inuyasha? Don�t be so stubborn, and come inside! Please? We
have saved you some Ramen! Inuyasha?� Another few careful steps, and she was
suddenly very close to the sounds. What if it was a youkai, looking for the
Shikon shards? She narrowed her eyes, trying to make something out in the
blackness of the night. To no avail; she couldn�t see a thing. Maybe it was
better to get back inside. Maybe it was just an animal, looking for food...

She backed up, not wanting to
turn her back to the forest. Something about it made her very wary of the
dangers that could lie hidden in the shadows. The shack was only a couple of
feet behind her, but she felt very alone and vulnerable right now.

As she took another step
back, she bumped into something. She frowned. A tree? There was no tree between
her and the shack... She froze.

A heavy hand fell on her
right shoulder. She almost jumped, but the hand firmly pressed her down. She
tried to turn around, but the person behind her prevented her from doing that,
as he lay his other hand on her left shoulder. She turned her head slightly,
afraid what to find. When she saw the hand and wrist, she didn�t have to see
the face to know who the person behind her was. These magenta stripes...

Suddenly, she became angry.
It swallowed up the fear and shock. Why did he... stalk her?! He *was* stalking
her! She didn�t want anything to do with him, she didn�t mean him any harm, and
he still continued to harras her! She hadn�t asked for this! So why didn�t he
leave her alone?!

She opened up her mouth to
tell him what was exactly on her mind, but she was muffled by one of his hands.

�Be quiet,� He whispered in
her ear. His breath was hot upon her skin, and she started to squirm under his
hold.

�Now, be a good girl and stay
still. Or do you want me to pay a visit to your friends?� He said softly. She
immediately stopped her movements, anitedited anxiously for his next move.

He didn�t take his hand off
her mouth; he must have been wary of her making a sound, thus alarming her
friends. His claws pierced through her clothing and her skin, drawing blood.
Still, she didn�t make a sound.

�So, you were looking for
that half breed, weren�t you?� He didn�t wait for a reply, as she coul giv give
one. He lowered his head somewhat, untill his chin rested on her head. With
someone else, she could have found this position intimate and caring; an
embrace, but with him, it was a mockery of all those things. He was acting not
like his normal, cold self; the Youkai who held such a distaste and disgust,
yes, even hate for humans, was now deliberately touching one! She shuddered,
and he smirked slightly. He moved his arm from her shoulder to her waist,
securing her to his proud figure.

�I saw him on my way... The
fool didn�t even notice me. I guess he was too... preoccupied with his comapnion...�

Kagome felt dread fill her.
Her shoulders slumped. Companion... He didn�t need to tell her who.

Sesshomaru�s smirk widened
ever so slightly when he noticed her reaction. Does it hurt? Good.

�I think it was the
priestess. What was her name again... Kikyou? I remember her. Wasn�t she the
one who pinned him to that tree for a fifty years? And still he goes after her,
even now she is nothing more than a mockery of what she once was. Clay and
earth, with only hate to live for... And still he wants to be with her. More
than he wants to be with you, doesn�t he?�

Kagome felt tears prick in
her eyes. So, it was true then. Her suspicions were true. She closed her eyes,
willing the tears to go away. She would not give in to her tears and she would
not crumble in front of the Demon Lord. Because after all, that was all he
wanted. That was why he sought her up again, to rub into her face, that she was
worth even less to Inuyasha, than a vengeful and dead
version of his true love. She was nothing in the eyes of Inuyasha. She just
came in handy sometimes, and that was why he still tolerated her. Her
self-loathing had just reached a new height.

Sesshomaru could barely
contain his malicious enjoyment. He couls smell her tears, and her aura, with
so much grief and sorrow in it, was dancing around her. Good. She deserved it.

�I heard him say you were nothing to
him, but a sharddetector... And even at
that you are lacking... And always a bother to him, hindering the rest of your
group in their progress...�

He felt a warm liquid falling
on his hand. She was crying. She was so weak! It disgusted him. It
disgusted him that even when she was led by her silly emotions, she somewhere
had the power to cause him damage. Him! The Lord of the Western Lands! He
detested it. He detested her! Her purifying powers had run through his body,
wreaking havoc, but in more ways than one... Somehow, it had become a thrill to
feel... He simply did not knew how to explain it. Another reason to simply kill
her! He had no use for this!

He was confused. He,
Sesshomaru, was confused about this girl. He wondered about her. And this was
something he never did. She was a nuisance. He sometimes caught himself
thinking about her. Somehow, the little human had wormed her way into his mind.
It was preposterous!

However, he wouldn�t be so
careless again. She would never be able to wound him again. He wouldn�t be
surprised by her again. No more unsuspected attacks or secret powers... He was
in control. He would stay in control. He had always been in control, over
everything in his life. One little Miko wouldn�t change that. She was not
worthy of his thoughts...

Damn her and her alluring
powers!

He unconsciously thightened
his grip on her waist, making her gasp. The hot breaths of her against his
hand, making him rather aware of his tight grip he still had on her face. Just
one quick and strong flick of his wrist, and he could break her neck... But why
end it now? He could make her suffer for the humiliation she had put him
through. She would find out that he, Sesshomaru, would not be fooled with. She
would pay.

Why he felt this almost alien
satisfaction and dark joy when he saw her pain, he did not know. It was so
different compared with what he felt for his half-brother. That was a cold
hate, disgust and the resolve to put an end to this shame to his family name.
But for her... The urge to see her in pain was a burning need, and when he
succeeded, he felt the malicious satisfaction sweep through him. About her
power... He felt attracted to it. He wanted it for himself... Why was a
simpering human wench bestowed with such amounts of power? It was a fluke! She
was a flaw in his world!

Kagome wasn�t aware of the
unusual feelings she raised in the demon Lord. She was aware, however, of the
increasing pressure on her waist and face. She was afraid he would shatter her
jawbone. She weakly struggled in his confining grip. But the emotional
enslaught she had went through, had drained her of her strenght... And safety
was just a couple of feet away... She wondered if she would ever make it. He
would probably kill her here, to finish what he had intended to do all along;
kill her.

Suddenly, she no longer
cared. What if he did? Would it be that bad? friefriends, and especially Shippo
came to her mind and she knew she had to try for him. Shippo depended on her!
What kind of parental figure would she pretended to be, if she gave up so
easily? He needed her. And he gave her unconditional love in return... that
would be enough to fight for... It was enough to fight for!

Suddenly she was released,
and she fell to the ground on her front. She quickly turned around, not wanting
to get caught surprised by Sesshoumaru�s actions. He stood before her, towering
over her. She craned her neck to see his face. That expressionless, cold f
Ey
Eyes which gave nothing away.

�Inuyasha is not here to save
you... Would he, if he was here? Think thatr. Wr. We�ll meet again.� And he
disappeared, leaving her alone; shaking with cold, fear and a deep sadness. She
picked herself up, and stumbled towards the shack. Opening the door, she felt
the welcoming warmth of the fire. Though it couldn�t reach her bleeding heart.

****

Things had gone from bad to worse since
that day. It was about a week ago, but so much had happened since then. She
could count on a visit from Sesshomaru almost each and every night. It mattered
not how hard she tried to avoid him; somehow he managed to catch her alone.
That was frustrating, to say the least. His taunts and insults grew worse. He
found the last remains of her self-confidence, and ripped them apart. He
poisoned her spirit and heart with his careless, but well-placed words. He used
her greatest weakness, Inuyasha, so expertly, so ruthlessly. He was looking for
her breaking point. Was he looking for another burst of that strange Miko
power? She didn�t know if she could muster the strenght for that anymore...

During the day, it was Inuyasha who would
hurt her, and at night it was his brother who continued that treatment. And he
was so much more refined in it! She had to give it to him; he was much better
in it than his brother... Their �meeting� from two days ago came to her mind.
It was one of the most humiliating and painful things she had experienced this
far in her life. And that was to say something, wasn�t it?

****
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In too deep	By : Pallas Category: InuYasha > General Views: 3689 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own InuYasha, nor make money from this story.

In too deep