Adult-FanFiction.org : Inuyasha / Yashahime

A House Divided
By : theMaven
Category: InuYasha > General
Views: 5281 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own InuYasha, nor make money from this story.
Chapter List
- 3
- 4
Author’s Note: After such a LONG wait, I believe all my readers are entitled to a LONG chapter
^ ^ This one is almost as long as the prologue and the first two chapters COMBINED, lol.
This chapter contains blood, violence, death, rape, extreme angst AND some Sess/Rin lemon-y
goodness. If you’re disturbed by or not old enough to read about these things, DON’T read any
further. You have been warned.
Thanks for reading, reviewing (and waiting ^_~) and I hope I don’t disappoint,
theMaven :)
                                                          A House Divided
                                                       Chapter 3: Daughter
Don’t call me “daughter”
Not fit to be
The picture kept will remind me
            Rin watched from the balcony of their shared chamber till her lord was but another splash
of white among the many crystalline flakes currently dotting the night sky. She drew in a deep
breath and pushed it out as his form finally disappeared over the horizon and his aura faded from
her extra-sensory range. She did not cry. Tears were pointless, exhausting and debasing.
Besides, they did not suit the occasion. Her lord would return, and though he had his doubts, she
knew he would be bringing Sorano with him.
            It had been well over a year since she’d last seen, spoken to or heard from her daughter,
and Rin suspected that she had changed just as much, if not more than Sesshoumaru and she.
Physically, the two of them had remained the same, but she was hardly the same girl he’d
claimed nearly 23 years ago, and he, too, had to make many adjustments over the years, which
left him understandably altered.
            They no longer traveled together. That had stopped immediately after the twins’ birth
when they both realized the strength of their bond and the power it held over the two of them. It
seemed her mate hadn’t been entirely correct in his reading of his father’s scrolls. Their bond
did, indeed, bind their spirits together in shared pleasure and pain, but the pain was not of a
physical nature. It hurt to be away from each other for too long.
            Now, that didn’t mean they felt oddly compelled to follow each other around the castle
from room to room, matching each other step-for-step and pace-to-pace. But . . . if she could not
see him, if she could not hear him, if she could not touch him, taste him, smell him, sense him in
some way or form, she began to despair. Every doubt she’d ever had about their relationship,
every fear, every apprehension would come crawling to the forefront of her mind, drowning out
the light in her life, shrouding her heart in shadow, leaving her cold, empty, acutely aware of the
absence of his presence.
            And he experienced the same.
            It was as Kimi had said. Her parents had become depressed because they couldn’t be
with one another. Her mother’s depression fed into her father’s depression, and they entered into
an unending loop, neither of them able to break free from the feelings of the other. But, if only
one of them had managed to grab hold of some small happiness, it would have greatly improved
the disposition of both of them. If only they’d had the sense to realize that feeling their mate’s
despair, their mate’s loss and suffering, their longing and loathing, the coldness of their
indifference and the heat of their hatred . . . feeling any of these things, all of these things was
better than feeling nothing from them at all.
            Rin sighed, finally retreating from the balcony and returning to the warmth of their
chamber. She shook the snow off her outer robe and ran her fingers through her hair, smoothing
down the errant strands now dampened by the dissolving snow. Were she any other human
female, her hair would have been grey by now, and other signs of aging would have began to
show, but because of Sesshoumaru, those things hadn’t happened to her, would never happen to
her.
            She turned and pulled the multi-paned doors closed, then secured the latch behind her.
Returning to their bed, she buried herself in the covers, stretched out on her back and let her
mind wander as she casually ran her fingers over the mark on her neck. She couldn’t be with him
physically, but she intended to lend him every bit of moral support she had.
            Turbulence. She could feel it coursing through her body, as she closed her eyes,
completing the connection between Sesshoumaru and she. He was so angry . . . indignant,
outraged and . . . unsure.
            She opened her eyes and shivered. No matter how many times she shared this connection
with her mate, it always unnerved her to see him as anything but the calm, cool creature who was
always so rational, always so certain, always so . . . confident that things would work out the way
he intended. It always meant that something bad was about to happen.
            She shook the unpleasant thought from her head, and again let her eyes drift closed, fully
activating their connection. It wouldn’t do any of them any good if she got upset. It would only
alarm Kohana, further agitate her lord and disturb the, so far, pleasant gestation of the new pup.
            She smiled to herself as her hands moved to smooth over the slight bulge of her abdomen.
After two decades of continuous miscarriages, she was finally able to carry a child beyond the
third month. She’d nearly lost the twins on more than one occasion, her womb too weak to
contain the developing hanyou pups. But, with unending bed rest, Sesshoumaru’s comforting
presence and her own determination, she’d carried them long enough for at least one of them to
be born healthy and strong–if somewhat malnourished. The other, Kohana . . .
            Again, she shook the disquieting thoughts from her head. She needed to focus. Her
thoughts needed to be centered on her lord, on the present, on the will and the strength of their
eldest daughter. Sorano was a fighter, and she would be fine. If she knew that and felt it at her
core, Sesshoumaru would feel it as well, hopefully giving him the initiative to shake off his
current uncertainty.
            Everything will be fine, she told herself as she sent her consciousness out to caress that of
her lord’s. Softly, she insisted. Carefully, she confided. Gently, she assured him as his mind
and hers became one.
            Once she was where she needed to be–acting as the quiet voice in the back of his head,
whispering words of encouragement–she ceased her assault on his senses, content to remain in
this position. If she pushed any further, delved any deeper, she would wake him–his youkai
self, his darker half. And he . . . it . . . hated her.
                                                                 8 8 8 8 8
            She’d been wearing his mark for two days, and she couldn’t have been happier. It was
cold on the outside, snowy and wet, but it was quite warm in their chamber. The flames of the
fire and the heat from her mate successfully staved off any chill she may have felt. And as she
leaned further into him, their bedding wrapped loosely about their unclothed forms, she’d never
felt more safe, more secure, more accepted and . . . completely loved in her life.
            A wry smile crossed her slightly swollen lips. And he was the cause. But it was . . . odd
how he seemed to know absolutely everything about her, how he seemed to know her every
thought before she could even make it.
            He knew when she was hungry, when she was tired or feeling particularly energetic. He
knew when she was angry or frustrated or sad. He knew when she was cold, he knew when she
was too warm, and he even claimed to have felt an ache in his loins that had nothing to do with
arousal or injury.
            “Are you in pain?” he asked her. “Have I hurt you?”
            They’d just broken off from their latest bout of love-making an hour before, and
they–him, moreso than her--were now taking a moment to recover, limbs lazily thrown over one
another. She cleared her throat, then sheepishly declared, “That’s because I have to go to the
bathroom. I . . . I just didn’t feel like getting up.”
            “Well, go relieve yourself. The sensation is most unpleasant.”
            The 17-year-old nodded as she slipped free from his embrace, feeling somewhat abashed
as she crept across the hall to her old room where the chamber pot was kept. When coupling, she
became acutely aware of his senses, of his thoughts, of his emotions, but without physical
contact, she was reduced to playing the same old guessing game with him. True, her guesses
were mostly right on target, but still, he seemed to have the upper hand on her in yet another area.
When she returned to their chamber, it was no surprise that he knew exactly what she’d been
thinking.
            “Am I doing something wrong?” she asked. “Why can you do it, but I can’t? Is it only
for youkai?”
            He pulled her closer to him, nestling her head in the crook of his shoulder, resting his
chin atop her head. “Yes . . . and no.”
            Her eyes sought out his face, slightly rolling back in their sockets. “What do you mean
‘Yes and no?’”
            “Youkai are trained from an early age to mask their thoughts and bar their emotions,
keeping them . . . safe from those who would seek to use them against them. Humans tend to be
more . . . free with such things.”
            “So, you’re keeping them from me,” she concluded. “Why? Are they so terrible?”
            He was silent for a moment, then softly said, “Some.”
            She unconsciously tensed beneath his touch, her spine stiffening, her forehead wrinkling.
“Are they about me? These ‘terrible’ thoughts? Now that you have me, do you regret taking
me?”
            He pulled her more snugly against him, lightly scraping his claws against her scalp.
“No.”
            “Then what do you have to hide?”
            “All youkai have a darker half, my Rin. A beast that lives within them that dictates
certain responses to a given stimulus. It may be contained, it may be cajoled, but only the
greatest of youkai can claim to have absolute control over it.”
            Rin gave a slight nod of understanding, her body slowly growing lax under the careful
caress of his claws and the soothing rumble of his voice.
            “While I may control its influence on my actions, I cannot control its thoughts.”
            Again, she nodded.
            “What I think of you, and what it thinks of you are two different, though not necessarily
mutually exclusive things.”
            Rin again tensed.
            “You have . . . seen part of my darker half in action.”
            “When you attacked that village,” she said. “The one where the hunters were keeping
me.”
            “Yes.”
            She watched as a mischievous grin curled the corners of his lips.
            “And at another time,” he continued.
            Rin remembered, heat and color rising to her cheeks.
            “This is what you do to me.” He lifted his lengthening claws to her face, baring the tips
of his fangs to her as he carefully caressed her right cheek, lightly scraping but not breaking her
delicate flesh. “These fangs,” he spoke huskily into her ear, “could cause you . . . a great deal
of pain, my Rin.” He nipped her earlobe, again tending to the wound with his tongue. “And
these claws,” he carefully scraped them down the length of her spine, “could easily rend you to
pieces.
            “You are either quite fearless . . . or quite foolish . . . for wishing such a feral beast to
appear.”
            She rubbed her thighs together, feeling her feminine flower lubricate itself at the thought
of her lord in such an . . . excited state. She leaned into his embrace, splaying her hand across his
bare chest, her fingertips mere inches from the mark she’d helped make on him. “That wasn’t so
bad,” she replied breathily.
            “But it could have been,” he insisted. “Because of our bond, the inner beast recognizes
you as his mate, and as such, certain . . . thoughts are inescapable.”
            Rin grinned, her fingertips treading dangerously close to the outer edges of her mark. “As
I said, that wasn’t so bad.”
            He drew in a ragged breath. “In your own way, you have subdued him.”
            “Then there’s no problem,” she teased.
            “No. Because you have subdued him, you are the greatest of threats.”
            She stilled her hand for a moment, allowing his words to digest.
            “He . . . owes you his loyalty, his protection, his life, and you owe him no less.”
            “I gladly give it,” she pushed herself away from him, propping herself up on her elbow,
staring down at him. She watched, quietly captivated by the softening of his features, the warm
glow in his amber eyes, the slight smile tugging at the corners of his finely-shaped lips.
            “It is . . . a touching sentiment. But, truthfully, when you gave yourself to me and my
darker half allowed himself to be dominated, you entered into an implicit agreement with him.”
            She smiled at him. “And what is that?”
            “You will remain faithful to me, or you will die.”
            Rin gave an uneasy laugh, attempting to lighten the mood, but her lord’s gaze remained
even, calm, serious.
            “You’d kill me!” she exclaimed.
            “I would not allow him to do such a thing, but . . . he is jealous, he is possessive, and he
is . . . vengeful,” he finally said. “I can inhibit his actions, but I cannot contain his thoughts. In
time, with age, I will gain ultimate control over my baser half, but, until then, I do not wish to
trouble you with such dark images.”
            She swallowed hard. “What are y–he thinking now?”
            His features again softened. “He is dormant, now, because you are near. Being bonded,
your presence puts him at ease.”
            Rin smiled.
            He reached out to trail his claws down the rear of her upper arm. “If there is something
you wish to know, simply ask me.”
            She, again, reclined on the bed, stretching herself out beside him. “How do you do it?”
She felt a shiver shoot down his spine as she caressed the outer rim of his ear.
            “Your mark,” he replied, shifting his body so it hovered above hers, his growing erection
grazing her inner thigh.
            She parted her legs to accommodate him, then reached up to brush her fingers over his
right pec. His reaction was immediate, his male member going completely rigid at the single
caress. She nudged her hips slightly forward, allowing his hardness to slide along the soft flesh
her upper thigh.
            He bit back a hiss of pleasure.
            “I thought that was the purpose of my mark.”
            He drew in a shaky breath and pushed it out, lowering himself to nip at his own mark on
her neck.
            Her body convulsed in response, a sudden rush of wetness, coating her woman’s canal.
            “When you touch it, yes. The contact is . . . arousing.” He licked alongside her neck up
to her right ear.
            Rin sighed and shivered, his male member coming to rest between her thighs. “And
when you touch it?”
            He nuzzled his nose in the nest of her hair, inhaling the aroma of her sweet arousal and
their combined scents. “It allows me to sense you whenever I please, wherever you are.”
            She thrust her hips against his, reveling in the feel of his thick member as it slid along her
slick her folds, his heated shaft stimulating her already excited nub. “And I can do the same to
you?”
            “Yesss . . . but as I have warned you . . .”
            “My lord would never allow me to come to harm. I am no more threatened by his
thoughts than his hands.”
            He groaned low in his throat as she wrapped her legs around him, tilting her hips upward
affording him the opportunity to enter her. “This Sesshoumaru can control his hands . . . My
baser thoughts are another matter.”
            “Please,” Rin whined, grinding her hips against his, threading her fingers through his hair.
She wanted him inside her, needed him to fill her, desired the completion she felt only when their
bodies connected and their souls intertwined.
            “Do not look for it,” he lightly warned her as he prepared to give in to her, opening the
bond which this intimate act had created.
            Rin smiled. “We’ve done this before and nothing happened.”
            He licked her outer ear then moved to nibble at her lips. “It is mainly dormant . . . when
we are coupled. It only seeks to surface when it is called . . . when I command it . . . or when
you... tempt it.”
            “Tempt?” Rin giggled. “Me?”
            “Yes,” he growled lowly, trailing his lips down her throat, across her collarbone and over
to her right breast. “Quite tempting.”
            Her back arched of its own accord as he sucked the dusky peak into his mouth, tonguing
the swollen bud till it was pebbled and stiff.
            “Please, Sesshoumaru . . .”
            “More?” he chuckled darkly.
            “All of you,” she gasped. “I want all of you.”
            He shifted above her, positioning his tip at her entrance.
            “I want to see, hear, feel, taste, touch, smell all of you.”
            He pushed into her, and she rocked her hips against his, completely seating him inside
her, filling her from the crown of her head to the tips of her slowly curling toes. When he
moved, she moved with him, and she could feel him flowing into her–his love, his passion, his
desire for her. And she returned them with equal fervor.
            His pulsing member buried within her undulating canal. His heaving chest pressed to her
highly sensitized breasts. His tongue teasing hers, her mouth massaging his. The gentle caress
of hands, the slow sliding of flesh against flesh.
            Rin moaned, giving and taking what her lord offered and requested with equal amounts of
enthusiasm. It was so good to be with him, so good to be in him–hearing his thoughts, sensing
his emotions, knowing him as she’d never known anyone else.
            As she slowly approached her peak, she was suddenly overcome with the desire to flip
him over and ride him into oblivion, guaranteeing that neither of them would be able to walk
straight for a couple of days . . .
            Or was that his wish? It was so hard to tell where she ended and he began like this.
            “Rin . . .” His voice was husky, his breath hot.
            “Do not look for it,” he’d lightly warned her.
            But what could be so terrible that it would make her turn from him? She wondered. All
his thoughts were right here, floating on the surface of his consciousness. It almost seemed she
could reach out and touch them if she wanted.
            In an instant, she found their situations reversed, her lord stretched out beneath her, she
straddling his hips in the dominant position. He gave her hip an insistent squeeze. “Keep your
thoughts on me, my Rin.”
            Rin gasped as he thrust upwards, hitting that particularly pleasurable spot deep within her.
She glanced down at him and took note of the red glint glowing in his eyes.
            He squeezed her hip again, and she began to rise and fall upon him. Her lord groaned,
and she felt the heat flare in her nether region. “Harder,” he commanded hoarsely.
            “Yessss,” she conceded. She brought her feet beneath her, adding spring to each bounce
she made upon his body.
            “Good girl.” The red in his vision remained, but his grip on her hip loosened.
            Rin bit her lower lip, sliding her hands down the front of his body, letting them come to
rest just above his navel, using the firm muscles and sweat-slickened flesh to add more push to
her rhythmic rising and falling. “Sesshoumaru . . .”
            Their eyes locked, and she felt it. It was staring back at her. It wasn’t as before when his
claws and fangs lengthened; his voice had grown rougher, deeper, and crimson bled into the
whites of his eyes. Even then, he was still himself. She could feel his love, sense his desire, see
his passion for her burning in the depths of his eyes.
            Though it was not a fearsome sight, the only thing she could see there, now, was
lust–pure, unadulterated, unrefined lust–animalistic in nature, all-encompassing in scope and
undeniable in its demands upon her. It was cold and hard, yet heated and fierce . . . possessive.
            She felt his claws dig into the flesh of her hind end, and she yelped.
            It smirked at her, clearly satisfied by her response.
            She frowned and was about to reprimand him when his hold on her loosened, and he
ground himself into her, rubbing his thumb over her center of pleasure.
            She cried out, her back arching, her chest heaving. “Gods,” she gasped.
            He continued to assault her center as she writhed against him, her shoulders slumping, her
head drooping forward, her eyes still locked with his. She felt compelled to watch him as he
watched her, his eyes completely red, his pupils an earthly hue of violet.
            He watched as her breasts bounced up and down. He watched as sweat began pouring
down her face. He watched as her muscles flexed and strained. He watched as her facial
expressions morphed from pleasure to tension to exhaustion.
            “Please,” she begged. “Please, Sesshoumaru . . .”
            He growled low in his throat, bolting upright as he bent her slightly backwards, his hand
supporting her back, as he thrust wildly and repeatedly into her scorching hot core, her thighs
slapping against his, one word resounding over and over in the back of his brain . . . “Mine.”
            Rin screeched as he bowed his back, wrapping his lips around one distended nipple as his
fangs pierced her flesh, and he emptied his seed inside her. As she recovered from her climax,
his peak replenishing her energy supply, she looked down to find him still nursing on the wound
he’d just made on her. “Gods,” she groaned as she felt the sparks of passion rekindle.
            He was still inside her and, despite his recent spend, he was still hard.
            She could hear him breathing, heavy and ragged. She could hear her heart racing, her
pulse pounding. She could hear the slurping, suckling sounds of his mouth on her breast, and she
could hear the same chant echoing around her outer ear.
            “Mine,” it said. “Mine. Mine. Mine. Mine.”
            “Yesss,” she finally agreed. “Yours.” She ground her hips against his, tossing her head
back as they began again.
            When they finished, the sun had risen and the flames in their fireplace had died down,
leaving little but smoldering ash. She laid on her side with him sleeping soundly, stretched out
beside her. Admittedly, this time she did feel a little sore, but she had no doubt the soreness
would soon give way to tingling which would quickly diminish into nothingness. Additionally,
he seemed to have left another, she snickered to herself, mark on her body. Two tiny puncture
wounds now graced her left breast. They’d already healed, but remained almost excruciatingly
sensitive–an odd amalgam of pleasure and pain pooling at the surface of her skin.
            She quickly discounted the sensations, attributing them to yet another youkai mating
habit. She then smiled down at her slumbering mate, lightly brushing his bangs back from his
forehead, tracing his symbol of office with the tip of her index finger. He worried far too much
about her. Yes, his youkai half seemed to be a bit rougher with her than her lord was wont to be,
but that didn’t detract from her enjoyment of their coupling. And, as for the “beasts” thoughts
towards her . . . they seemed to be limited to a single term denoting possession.
            He . . . it didn’t try to harm her, and she certainly wouldn’t give him a reason to.
            “He . . . owes you his loyalty, his protection, his life, and you owe him no less.”
            “I gladly give it.” She watched, quietly captivated by the softening of his features, the
warm glow in his amber eyes, the slight smile tugging at the corners of his finely-shaped lips.
            “It is . . . a touching sentiment. But, truthfully, when you gave yourself to me and my
darker half allowed himself to be dominated, you entered into an implicit agreement with him.”
            She smiled at him. “And what is that?”
            “You will remain faithful to me, or you will die.”
            Rin scoffed inwardly. As if she’d have a reason to be “unfaithful” or “disloyal.” She
owed him everything–mind, body and soul. He’d opened himself to her, revealed his weaknesses
to her, left himself vulnerable only in her presence. To even think of betraying the trust he’d
placed in her, turned her stomach.
            She stretched out beside him and rested her head on his shoulder, laying her open palm on
his chest. Perhaps this . . . Mitsuko woman didn’t know what she’d had when Sesshoumaru had
offered her a lifetime of his companionship, but she knew, and she’d never doing anything to
jeopardize that.
                                                                 8 8 8 8 8
            She’d been so happy in the beginning, thrilled beyond words that she’d finally have the
opportunity to pass on to her pups everything her mother had taught her. Feeling their presence
within her, even as small as they were, filled her with an insurmountable amount of pride and
made her long even more for her mate’s return. She knew he’d only been gone a few weeks–six,
to be exact–and the business he was attending to was quite important, but she couldn’t help but
want him here by her side.
            True, she could simply open their connection and share her thoughts with him, informing
him of his impending fatherhood, but she wanted to see his face when she told him. She wanted
to see that almost unnoticeable spark in his amber eyes, the nearly imperceptible smile on his
lips. She wanted him to hold her and kiss her and shower her with compliments. She wanted his
love, his approval, his acceptance of the two pups she now carried.
            Yes, he’d promised her pups of their own, and he’d practically guaranteed her that
because of both of their strengths, their pups would be strong as well . . . but a little voice in the
back of her head kept saying, “What if?”
            What if they’re not strong? What if he doesn’t approve of them? What if his hatred of
InuYasha truly is because of his human blood, and he exhibits the same hatred towards the
twins?
            But . . . they’d already discussed that. They wouldn’t simply be half human; they would
be half her. And, as he’d declared his love for her, certainly that love would carry on to their
children.
            Rin sighed and unfolded her legs from Lotus position, tilting her head back, to the front,
then to the sides. She then pushed herself to her feet, stretching her legs by walking around the
dojo in the East Wing. If Sesshoumaru were here, she wouldn’t be having these doubts. It was
because of their bond, because of the absence of his presence that she felt so lost.
            She had done as he’d requested, continuing her studies, running the household, keeping
her spirits up. But it was hard to keep her thoughts from drifting to him when every little thing in
the castle reminded her of him. And when she was alone in their room at night . . .
            “Stop it,” she whispered to herself. “Be strong. He’ll be back.”
            But, two more weeks passed, and she hadn’t heard one word from him, felt one inkling
from his end of their connection. Of course, he was probably quite busy, having little time to
himself, let alone time to think about her. And if he did open their connection, he’d ruin her
surprise!
            Yes, the more she thought about it, she knew he’d be pleased. InuYasha already had two
sons and a third on the way, so, naturally, the elder brother would want to catch up with the
younger. She could see him gloating over the hanyou, now.
            “How long did it take you and your mate to conceive? My Rin conceived on the first
attempt.”
            She smiled to herself at the thought of it, and ignored the gnawing sensation in her
stomach. No matter how much she seemed to eat these days, she was always hungry, and despite
feeling tired, she was never able to sleep. She just couldn’t get comfortable! She was showing a
little, but nothing that should truly impede her movements. She didn’t have this “morning
sickness” Kagome had warned her about, but she did feel nauseous and dizzy from time-to-time.
And while Kagome had complained that she was constantly running to use the bathroom, Rin
barely had to go at all, any more. But, as long as there was no bleeding and no pain, every female
she’d ever come in contact with assured her that the pups were fine and her pregnancy was
progressing as it should.
            Her smile grew. If Sesshoumaru agreed, she already knew what she wanted to name the
boys–Toga, after her lord’s father, and Ringo, after her older brother. He was always such a good
boy, her brother–everything a good son should be. He always obeyed Father. He was careful to
honor Mother. He respected their ancestors and the elders in the village . . . And he never failed
in his duty to look after her.
            She sniffed lightly, blocking out the unpleasant image and the surge of sadness that
followed. He’d died protecting her. Father had died protecting Mother. Mother had died trying
to run Ringo and she off, encouraging them to hide somewhere deep in the forest. But when
they ran, the bandits ran after them, a few feet behind them. It was dark, and they could barely
see the path, let alone a suitable place to hide, and the bandits had torches.
            “Split up!” he’d commanded her.
            And being a good daughter, she followed the advice of her mother and obeyed her brother
without question. They separated and slipped into the shadows. She climbed one tree, while he
climbed another. Across the pathway, by the light of the pale, crescent moon, he could see her,
she could see him, and they could both see the torchlight of the bandits as they passed beneath
them. As fate would have it, one of the branches of her tree broke off just as the last man was
going by.
            She quickly ducked inside the hollow of the tree, hiding herself from their prying eyes,
but still, they made their way over to her tree. Rin bit her lower lip to keep from crying. It would
only be a matter of time before they found her out and climbed the tree to fetch her. They would
probably sell her to a tea house and turn Ringo into their own, personal slave.
            Tea houses were horrible places, her mother had said, and anything was better than being
a slave.
            Then the unthinkable happened.
            “Hey!” Her brother called out.
            She glanced over at him and watched, awe-struck, as Ringo drew the attention away from
her tree and over to his, kicking a dead branch onto the forest floor, fully drawing their attention.
He met her questioning gaze and placed a single finger to his lips
            It was just like Hide and Seek, she thought off-handedly. Ringo and she often played
with their mother or the other children in the village. They would always hide together, and
when they came close to being spotted, he’d gesture for her silence, then he’d jump out and run
to base. After their “seekers” took off after him, she’d come out of hiding, and the two of them
would always end up “safe” at base.
            It’s just a game, she told herself, trying to quell her tremors. Just a game.
            The men shouted, and her brother scampered down the trunk and tried to dissolve into the
darkness. She tucked herself tighter within the confines of the tree, hoping to avoid notice as
their shouts continued then broke into a loud cheer.
            Ringo always cheered when he reached base, but none of those joyful cries belonged to
her elder brother. Curious, she poked her head out of the hollow and watched in silent horror as
one of the men dragged her brother, swearing and struggling, back onto the forest path. The
other men formed a circle, and the man then tossed her brother inside it.
            He fell to his knees, then scrambled to his feet, his small frame eclipsed by the larger
stature of the men, the red-orange glow of the torchlight casting unnatural shadows upon him.
            “Where’s the girl?” one of them demanded.
            Her brother didn’t answer. A fist came out of nowhere and struck him from behind, his
form collapsing to the ground.
            Rin repressed a scream.
            More questions, kicking and cursing followed, her brother’s moans, grunts and groans
echoing in her outer ear. She was worried about him, and she wanted to help him . . . but that’s
not the way the game was played. She always stayed in her hiding place till the “seekers” were
gone and her brother had reached base. As long as she could hear him, she convinced herself,
he’d be fine.
            Boys always liked to rough house with one another, and though some small part of her
knew that wasn’t what was happening on the forest floor, there was another part of her that
needed to believe that, or she was going to lose what was left of her little mind.
            First her father, then her mother, and now Ringo.
            A sharp cry cut through the forest followed by a mournful gurgling sound. The circle of men
broke apart, and she saw him. Bloodied, bruised, broken, laying on the forest floor, his eyes
wide, his mouth open, blood trickling down his chin, his arms and legs twisted into most
unnatural angles.
            She opened her mouth to scream . . . but nothing came out. Nothing at all.
            The bandits lingered over her brother’s body a moment longer, and then they retreated into
the darkness, the absence of torchlight signifying their complete departure.
            Rin collapsed into herself, silent tears falling down her face as her stomach twisted itself
into knots, trying to relieve itself of the last meal she and her family had shared together.
            Why? She thought mournfully. Why?
            Stupid, Rin cursed herself, running her palm over her slightly swollen abdomen. Now
isn’t the time to think of such things. Be happy, she scolded herself. You live, and live well
because of their sacrifices.
            But . . . she did feel more than a little guilty. When she traveled with Sesshoumaru and
they passed near her village, she’d always stopped by to pay her respects to her family’s graves,
telling her lord and Jaken that she was simply going to gather food. And she did gather food, but
the real point of her trip was laying flowers on their graves.
            Her mother had taught her it was the honorable thing to do. A female obeyed her father
and brothers (and, later, her husband and his family). She learned the lessons taught by her
mother. She respected her elders and superiors, and she to paid her respects to the dead,
honoring the ancestors who’d paved her way to her current life. Daily visits weren’t necessarily
required, but it was polite and expected to inform them of the important events in your life:
moving, purchasing new property, marriage, pregnancy, the death of a spouse or a child, and, if
you were aware of it, the time before your own death.
            Admittedly, she hadn’t seen her family in . . . Her forehead creased in thought.
            Well, she hadn’t traveled with Sesshoumaru since her cycle had begun, and she’d been 13
when that had happened. And in this most recent trip she’d made with him, she never had the
opportunity. After her kidnaping and she’d been returned to the castle, Sesshoumaru, Jaken and
Ah-Un covered the area where her village used to be, so she didn’t have the chance to visit.
            When she was younger, Sesshoumaru refused to let her leave the castle gates unescorted,
and while she supposed she could have asked for permission to visit her family’s graves, the
request struck her as oddly ungrateful. Yes, she simply wanted someone she could talk to,
someone she could unburden her troubles on, someone who would listen without interruption
and without offering advice. She desperately craved the comfort of a friendly ear, but . . . her life
was here with him, now–with him, Jaken and Ah-Un within the confines of the castle gates. She imagined he
never thought she’d want to return to the home of so many awful memories, and to request to do
so . . .
            But, now was not then. Then, she wasn’t permitted to leave the castle grounds
unescorted, but now that she was the lady of the castle, who would try to stop her?
            Too much time had passed, and too much had changed in her life to put off the visit any
longer. She was married, now, and expecting. She was the Lady of the Western Lands, mistress
of a vast territory. She was loved, well cared for and protected. And she was immortal and quite
capable of protecting herself, now. No one ever needed sacrifice themselves for her safety again.
            Rin decided. Even though it was winter, the least hospitable time for travel, she owed her
ancestors this much. After all, without them, none of this would have been possible. With Ah-Un she could have made it to her old village in two days or so, but since her lord had taken him,
she’d have to rely on an ordinary horse. That would increase her journey by about three days. So
. . . five days to get there, a day or so to visit, and five days to return.
            She’d have to pack accordingly, bringing enough warm clothing, food and supplies to last
the extent of her travels. Just in case, she’d need money to possibly stay in a village if the
weather was too severe to camp in a cave. She’d take her swords, she’d wear her armor, and
maybe she’d ask Sumida to accompany her to distract her from any particularly unpleasant
thoughts and keep her company on the lonely trail.
            Yes. She would ask Sumida, they would make the journey, her ancestors would be
satisfied, and her mother would be proud. To think, her little Rin had accomplished so much in
such a short period of time.
            She pushed herself off the dojo floor and dusted off her hakama. She’d make the
preparations tonight, and Sumida and she could leave in the morning.
            “I think that’s a wonderful idea,” the bald youkai smiled.
            They were sitting down for their midday meal in the Dining Hall. Rin had several dishes
set out before her on the low table, while Sumida dined on a simple bowl of rice and vegetables.
            “It is good to keep in touch with one’s family,” she added.
            Rin nodded. “Especially since I’ve been doing such a poor job of it of late.”
            “I’m sure they understand,” Sumida countered. “You’ve been quite busy.”
            “But I always managed to find time before.”
            “The responsibilities of the young greatly differ from those of a mate and mother.” She
raised her bowl to her mouth and shoveled in a portion of food. “Have you checked with
Akako?” she asked. “To make sure horseback riding is all right?”
            “Why shouldn’t it be?” she asked. “I’m not that far along. I’m barely showing.”
            “Still, horseback riding is a vigorous activity. It uses all sorts of muscles, it bounces you
up and down, then there’s always the possibility of being knocked out of the saddle.”
            Rin frowned. “I suppose you do have a point. I don’t want anything to happen to the
twins, but I do want to see my family. It’s important to me, and it’s been weighing quite heavily
on my conscience, lately.”
            “Oh?”
            “Yes. I’m not sure about youkai, but humans have a tradition regarding their ancestors.
You’re supposed to consult them before making any important decisions in your life.”
            “Consult them?” she asked. “As if asking for their permission?”
            “Not so much their permission, but their guidance, their approval.”
            “I see!” Sumida declared. “You want to ask for their blessings.”
            Rin nodded. “I had an older cousin once who married without consulting her ancestors
first, and she ended up with a man who constantly beat her and then divorced her for not bearing
him any sons,” the lady sighed. “Later on, he ended up squandering his earnings in tea houses. It
was really quite sad, and Mother said it was entirely avoidable.”
            This time Sumida nodded. “Having a male that mistreats you is a bad thing. But would it
really be so terrible if she had all daughters and no sons?”
            “You know that it is,” Rin said. “Sons are treasures; daughters are liabilities.”
            Sumida scoffed. “Yes, the world sees them that way, but after everything you’ve been
through, do you truly believe that? A son has more worth than a daughter? A female is less
valuable than a male?”
            Rin sat in silence, pondering the seiyuuki youkai’s words.
            “What if the twins are girls, and not boys, at all? Will you treat them any differently?
Will you allow your lord to treat them any differently?”
            Rin lightly bit on her lower lip. “Well . . . certainly girls have their uses, and they can be
just as strong as any male, but . . .” Sesshoumaru’s father had only produced sons. InuYasha had
only produced sons. Certainly, Sesshoumaru would want the twins to be boys.
            It wasn’t a matter of prejudice; it was simply about practicality. Being hanyou but male
would give them a fighting chance. But being hanyou and female . . .
            “Would it be such a disappointment to have two daughters instead of two sons?” the
female asked, her left eyebrow raised.
            She spoke slowly. “I would be happy just because they came from my lord and me,
but...”
            “But what?” her former master insisted.
            “It never occurred to me that they could be girls. I’m not saying that girls are bad, but...”
            “You just insinuated that your cousin was cursed with a bad marriage and all female
offspring because she didn’t seek the blessings of her ancestors. If having all girls was a
favorable thing, you wouldn’t have mentioned it in such a negative light . . . and, apparently, her
‘husband’ wouldn’t have had any reason to leave her.”
            “I wouldn’t love my daughter any less than my son,” Rin protested. “My mother certainly
didn’t love me any less than my brother.”
            “And your father?” she asked. “What did he think of you?”
            “My father died for me,” she spat out. “So did my mother and brother.”
            “And did your mother’s sacrifice mean any less to you than those of your brother and
father?”
            She really didn’t want to talk about this. She wanted to keep her spirits up, her thoughts
light. “No,” she whispered hoarsely. “She was always . . .”
            A sudden series of images flashed before her eyes. She saw her mother smiling; her
mother laughing; her mother playing with Ringo and she. Her mother sitting by the fire,
mending the nets, sewing kimonos, preparing their many meals. An empty table, three full bowls
of rice, her own rumbling stomach and empty bowl. “Take some of mine,” her mother had said,
brown eyes beaming, pale skin glowing, dark hair flowing down her back in an intricate braid.
            “But Rin already ate hers,” she’d said, her father and brother working on their third
helpings.
            “But you’re still hungry, still growing. I don’t need nearly this much.” She emptied half
the contents of her bowl into her daughter’s, half of the only thing she’d had to eat all evening.
“It would make me HAPPY for you to eat it.”
            She saw herself falling, tangled in brambles and low-lying branches, her kimono ripping,
her mother rushing to her side.
            “Don’t cry, now. It’s not so bad.” She lifted the hem of Rin’s robe and tended to the
scrapes underneath. “You’re getting to be a big girl, and big girls don’t cry over little things.
See how little these scratches are.”
            The young girl pouted. “But Rin ruined her kimono. It’s all torn. It’s already been
patched so many times.”
            “I’ll just make you a new one, then.”
            “Father says we don’t have any money for new things.”
            Her mother smiled, patting the top of her head. “It won’t cost anything to turn one of my
old robes into a new one for you. Now, get up, and let’s get you cleaned off.”
            “But you’ll only have one, then. The one you’re wearing.”
            “My dear girl, one is all anyone needs.”
            She saw torches, strange men, unfamiliar horses. She heard screams, trampling footsteps,
pounding hoofbeats. “Ringo! Rin! Run!”
            Her mother and she had spent the day at the river with Ringo and their father, helping
them with the day’s catch. They’d eaten by the riverside, grilling a few fish and gathering some
odd herbs and mushrooms to make their meal. As the sun set and night fell, they slowly wound
their way back to the village–she skipping, Ringo running circles around her, Father walking
ahead with their nets and catch, Mother just behind him to his right.
            “We’re being raided!” Father declared, running ahead to help defend their village.
“Stay here!”
            Mother obeyed, crouching down, gathering her brother and her into her arms.
            “Father!” Ringo declared.
            “No!” her mother scolded. “A raid is no place for women and children.”
            “I’m not a child!” her brother argued.
            “But you’re not a man, either. Now, be quiet.”
            Several painful moments passed before noise broke through the forest underbrush. In the
low light, seeing the familiar navy blue and grey of Father’s haori and hakama, all three of them
seemed to relax . . . but that was a mistake.
            “Look what I found.”
            Mother screamed as the man roughly seized her by the back of her braid, her hold on
Ringo and her loosening. The man pressed a knife to mother’s neck. Rin fell backwards; Ringo
lunged forward.
            “No!” Mother cried.
            Father seemed to come out of nowhere, knocking the strange man to the ground. They
wrestled. “Run!” Father commanded. More men could be heard heading in their direction,
torchlight marking their location.
            Mother grabbed Ringo and her, dashing deeper into the forest. Rin’s feet moved
forward, but her eyes were glued on the man and her father, illuminated by the sporadic light of
the crescent moon. Soon, the man rose, and her father lay still, a red line stretching from one
ear to the other, the ground beneath him coated in crimson.
            “Don’t look!” her mother admonished. “Hide and Seek,” she said. “We’re going to
play a nice game of Hide and Seek.”
            They hid, and one of the bandits found them. Mother jumped up, attacking the man. In
the torchlight, Rin could see a thin trail of red lining the right side of her neck. That other man
had cut her.
            “Ringo! Rin! Run!” She barred the man’s passage as they scampered from beneath the
bushes and ran down the trail. Again, Rin’s feet moved forward, but her head was turned back.
The man ripped the front of her kimono, exposing her chest and stomach. Mother bit his ear as
he moved to put his mouth on her exposed chest.
            He screamed as he pushed Mother back, part of his bloodied ear still in her mouth.
            “Bitch!” He lunged forward, knocking them both to the ground, then wrapped both
hands around her neck.
            “C’mon, Rin,” Ringo urged.
            Her mother’s eyes bulged, her arms and legs flailing wildly. She gulped and gasped,
clawing at the man above her. Her movements slowed, then stopped, her eyes wide and glassy,
her tongue lolling out the side of her mouth.
            “C’mon!” Ringo repeated, tugging on her hand.
            Because of her need to see, they’d only traveled a few feet from their hiding place. She
wasn’t sure if their mother’s attacker could see them because of all the shadows. But she could
see him.
            She could see him releasing his hold on his mother’s neck and reaching for the ties of his
hakama. She could see him grabbing her mother’s legs and raising them above her head. She
SAW him as he collapsed on top of her then licked his blood off her mother’s mouth. “Still
warm,” she heard the man murmur.
            “Rin!”
            She snapped back to the present at the sound of Sumida’s voice.
            “Are you all right?” she asked, gently laying her hand atop hers. “You were talking to
me, then you just . . . went blank.”
            “Sacrifice,” Rin whispered, her eyes lowered, her head tucked into her chest. “She was
always sacrificing for us.” She swallowed the lump that had settled in her throat.
            “Of course,” Sumida agreed. “It’s in the female’s nature.”
            She shook her head, trying to clear her head of the unpleasant memories. “But I don’t
want that,” she said. “The sacrifices aren’t worth it.”
            Her old master stared at her, confusion evident in black eyes, her aura glowing a mixture
of black, muddy blue and murky red.
            “I don’t want a girl,” she declared, the strength returning to her voice. “Just look at me,
Sumida. Despite my mother’s sacrifices, despite my own accomplishments and my own
perceived self-worth, I don’t want a daughter. In our hearts we’re quite ungrateful, and despite
the sacrifices made on our behalf and the sacrifices we, ourselves, make, we’re really very
selfish. I don’t want . . . a girl,” she finally said. “I don’t want her to have my life. I want a son.
A healthy . . . strong . . . valiant son.” She swallowed again, her emotions threatening to overtake
her as her brother’s bloodied body again flashed before her mind’s eye. “Girls are . . . too much
trouble,” she concluded.
            “Males can be just as troublesome,” Sumida said stoutly, the blue fading from her aura,
nearly overwhelmed by the raging red.
            She slid her hand from beneath Sumida’s and placed it in her lap. “But males are
equipped to handle such things,” she said softly. “If they cause trouble, they can better get
themselves out of it.” How many times had her lord been harmed coming to her rescue? How
many times should she have been able to avoid those troublesome situations? Would they even
have cared to take her if she’d been a boy? They always went after her, not Jaken . . .
            And even now, the other lords and ladies would site her as the reason her lord didn’t
deserve to rule his own lands. Sesshoumaru had said so, himself.
            “I just don’t understand,” Sumida said. “You should be proud of whatever you
have–male or female.”
            Rin felt ill, the bitter taste of bile rising in the back of her throat. “I should be, but I’m
not,” she spat out. “That proves how unfit a mother, how unfit a daughter I am. Certainly, my
mother raised me better than this, but . . .”
            She was going to cry. She was going to cry, or she was going to be sick. Either way,
something she didn’t want to come out was going to come out.
            “I don’t want anyone else to suffer!” The tears came, and she hid them behind her hands.
“I want sons!” she swore hotly. “I want sons, or I want nothing at all!”
            “My lady . . .”
            “What type of heir will a female make?” she demanded. “How can she rule effectively if
she’s constantly being attacked by those who hate hanyous and those who look at females as
something vulgar and low, or something simply to be humored or seduced and disposed of?
How will she live? How will she be happy!” More tears fell; the sick feeling in her stomach
grew. “My lord said his mother was quite unhappy–even in her mating to his father. He was her
only happiness. Her son.”
            Sumida’s anger faded, her aura settling into a dark and dismal blue-grey. “I know not
how to answer that. Lady Sora was, indeed, unhappy in her ruling responsibilities.” Now, it was
the master that seemed to swallow a lump of emotion. “In her younger years, she prayed every
day that her mother would conceive a son for her father, but . . . no. It never happened.”
            A sharp stab of pain coursed through Rin’s abdomen, forcing her to gasp and double over.
            Sumida sprang to her feet. “My lady!”
            “I don’t feel well,” she half groaned, half whispered. “I think I over-excited myself.”
            The youkai female scooped her up as if she were no heavier than the silk robes she wore.
“I’ll take you to Akako. Together, we should be able to tell if there’s something wrong.”
            “Nothing’s wrong,” she said, weakly. “They’re both fine. My boys are both fine.”
Unconsciousness began to claim her, a warm rush of wetness forming between her thighs. “I will
visit my ancestors,” she whispered, her eyes drooping closed, “and they will bless me . . . bless
us... bless us all.”
                                                                 8 8 8 8 8
            Rin cringed, her eyes flying open, abruptly severing the connection between Sesshoumaru
and she. She shivered slightly and sat up, pulling their bedding tightly around her, then drew in a
deep breath and pushed it out.
            She’d gone too far into his thoughts, that was all. His youkai half always evoked the
darkest dealings of her heart, bringing them into the glaring light, exposing them for the world to
see.
            She’d died giving birth to her daughters, and her mate had “died” with her, his body
incapacitated while his soul searched for hers, pulling it back to the mortal plane. For this
reason, they couldn’t travel together for fear of attack and both of their “real” deaths. But that
didn’t mean her thoughts couldn’t go with him–both the good and the bad.
            She drew in another cleansing breath and pushed it out. She’d been so foolish in her
youth, so short-sighted and single-minded.
            She fought off the urge to weep and failed.
            She would take it all back if she could, but she couldn’t. Her daughter hated her, and that
was inescapable. Her mother was, doubtlessly, greatly displeased with her, and that, too, was
inescapable. She’d even managed to displease her lord, and though he’d said all was forgiven
and all was forgotten, the pictures refused to fade from her memory.
            She lifted her head to the ceiling and silently prayed. Please, let her live. Please, give me
the chance to redeem myself. Please, let her forgive me . . . forgive HIM . . . forgive US . . .
PLEASE!
            “Mother?” a knock on the door shook her from her thoughts. “Kohana smells tears. Is
Mother crying? Why is Mother crying? And where did Father go? Kohana can’t feel him in the
castle.”
            Rin swallowed hard and commanded her voice not to crack. “Come in,” she said sweetly.
            The heavy, wooden door creaked open and a head of silver hair peaked in.
            Her tears quickly evaporated, and Rin smiled, a slight laugh resonating throughout her
voice. “Come on,” she said. “It’s all right. You can sleep with me tonight.”
            At that, the woman-child bounded through the door and leapt onto the bed, her amber
eyes bright, her pointed ears twitching. She bounced a bit on the bed, her bosom and unbound
hair following her movements, then settled down beside her, rubbing her nose beneath Rin’s
chin.
            Then she shot up again, her nose wrinkled, her face frowning. “You and father have been
mating again.”
            Rin frowned then laughed at the sight of her youngest daughter’s disapproving face.
“You know very well what mothers and fathers do together in their beds at night. I’ve explained
it to you, and so has your sister. It’s allowed.”
            “Ewwww,” she slid out of the bed and onto the floor, resting on her haunches. “Kohana
will sleep on the rug.”
            Rin grinned. “Then I’ll join you.” She joined the hanyou female on the floor, and they
both curled up on the rug together, Rin’s right arm draped across Kohana’s shoulders, the girl’s
back to her mother’s chest.
            “Is Sorano all right?” she asked quietly after they’d settled into a comfortable position
and the room had fallen silent.
            “She’s hurt,” Rin answered, honestly. “Your father is going to help her.”
            “Will she let him help her?” she asked. “She was mad at him last time.”
            Rin nodded. “I know, but . . . things change.”
            “She didn’t want to be subdued,” Kohana said. “She said she’s not an animal.”
            “I know,” Rin said.
            “It wasn’t her fault,” Kohana continued. “It’s hard controlling it,” she quietly confided.
“It screams at you sometimes, and it makes you listen.”
            “I know,” she said again.
            “She didn’t mean to hurt me. Sorano loves Kohana. She took care of me, taught me.”
            “I know,” she replied, yet again, snuggling closer to her daughter’s warmth.
            “Don’t be mad at Sorano,” she whined. “Don’t send her away again.”
            “We didn’t send her away,” she said. “She left us. She went to live with Kiyoshi because
he’s her mate.”
            “But she wanted to stay here. She would have stayed here.”
            “I know.” Rin sighed. What else could she say? Though nearly fully grown, Kohana
understood little more than a six-year-old. There was considerably more to the story than she
knew, but even if someone told her about it, Rin doubted she could make much sense of it. After
all, she was just beginning to make sense from some of the scenes of her own childhood.
“Maybe she can stay this time,” she relayed in her most comforting tone.
            “That would be nice.”
            She couldn’t see her daughter’s face, but she could hear the smile in her voice and sense
the change in her mood. What little aura she had glowed a soft pink. “But, let’s get some rest
right now. We’ll probably have a long day ahead of us tomorrow.”
            The younger of the twins nodded. Soon, she fell into a sound sleep as Rin combed her
fingers through her hair.
            “Please,” she softly repeated the end of her prayer.
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A House Divided	By : theMaven Category: InuYasha > General Views: 5281 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own InuYasha, nor make money from this story.

A House Divided