Adult-FanFiction.org : Inuyasha / Yashahime

B & B	By : SplendentGoddess Category: InuYasha AU/AR > Het - Male/Female Views: 4729 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: Inuyasha, and the characters therein, are the property of Rumiko Takahashi. I am in no way affiliated with Takahashi or VIZ Productions, and I do not gain financially from my fanfic in any way.

Chapter List
- 3
- 4
- 5
Chapter 4 - Intervening Destiny
"Faster!" Kagome cried out, her eyes closed in bliss as she tightened her grip on Inuyasha's shoulders.
"Keh." he replied, his tone full of amusement as he gave his next spring an extra kick, launching them from treetop to treetop with the speed of a Cheetah and the precision of a flying squirrel.
"You're gonna want your eyes open for this one!" the hanyou called out after a moment, somehow sensing that the miko on his back had her eyes closed, though he knew it was not from a fear of heights.
"Oh wow..." she breathed, daring to open her eyes against the sting of the wind zipping by them to spy the utterly magnificent sight before her.
Suddenly her eyes were wide open, the wind seemingly unaffecting her gaze as she stared down at the beautiful landscape below. Inuyasha had taken them both to a secret spot of his; someplace he'd stumbled upon while exploring back when he'd first ventured into her neck of the woods. Sailing high above a cascading waterfall, Inuyasha skillfully leapt from tree to tree, gradually slowing his pace with each step until he could hit the ground running, coming to a stop and letting the miko off his back as they stood in a field of flowers overlooking the waterfall.
"Inuyasha...it's beautiful." Kagome whispered in awe, absolutely stunned to realize there were still remote places as gorgeous as this one left completely untouched by man.
Not as beautiful as you, the hanyou thought, though he didn't dare voice something like that out loud.
"Keh."
Sighing quietly to herself, Kagome prayed for the atmosphere of what was truly the perfect setting to help her find the courage to voice her thoughts on recently made self-discoveries. For the first couple of days since Halloween nothing had changed between them, their daily routines going by as usual while Kagome continued to run her thoughts around in her head. But today, on Culture Day, she had miraculously gotten brave enough to ask Inuyasha if he wanted to do anything in honor of the national holiday. It was the perfect excuse to exploit the holiday as their reasoning for breaking with the norm. In celebration of freedom and artistic creativity, Inuyasha had surprised Kagome by smirking at her question, and telling her that if she was brave enough, he did indeed have something in mind that they could do in honor of the holiday. Immediately recognizing the playfulness of his challenge, instead of feeling nervous, Kagome had put her hands on her hips and told him to bring it on. That was how she'd found herself to be riding on his back soaring high above the trees. Inuyasha had teased that he'd never said his idea had had anything to do with honoring human culture.
That he was so willing to open up to her in such a way, to show off his youkai abilities and share with her an experience normally reserved solely for his kind, once again she felt both humbled and honored. While it had been weird riding on his back, at first, she'd gotten used to it quickly enough, already having come to thoroughly enjoy the experience by the time they'd made it back to her home on Halloween night. So it came as no surprise when only three days later, when Inuyasha had squatted before her and instructed that she hop on, she had done so, literally, earning a chuckle from the half-dog man as he hooked his hands under her legs. It helped that she was currently wearing jeans, which made the moment a little less awkward sexually, since it was unquestionably intimate to straddle his back in such a way, even for the purpose of transportation.
Bringing her thoughts back into the here and now, Kagome turned and offered Inuyasha a brilliant smile in gratitude for bringing her to such a beautiful place.
"Inuyasha..." she started after a moment.
"Yeah?" he asked, turning away from the waterfall to give her his full attention.
"About...when my inn gets busy come winter..." she began, only to get cut off with an understanding shake of his head.
"Don't worry about it." he told her, brushing off her concerns. "I know you'll need all three rooms. I can head out into the woods for a few months or whatever, ain't no big deal."
"But, what about the nights of the new moon?"
He merely shrugged.
The truth was, it was a lingering uncertainty that was still bothering him more than a little bit, but for the time being he was simply trying to enjoy his time with Kagome without letting his usual pessimistic paranoia get the better of him. Inuyasha had been relieved beyond words when the following morning after Halloween Kagome had greeted him normally as she'd puttered around in the kitchen fixing breakfast, as though nothing awkward had occurred between them the night before. Immediately letting the duel near-kiss moments fall into a deliberately neglected pocket of memory where he could pretend the events had never happened, Inuyasha had been happy to assist Kagome with weeding her garden and preparing his latest catch for that night's dinner. Their established routine repeated itself the following day without incident, though today, he was admittedly overjoyed by Kagome's reaction to his suggestion and action upon her inquiry of whether or not he wanted to do anything special in honor of Culture Day. Truth be told, he didn't really give a rat's ass about most human holidays, but if it could function as an excuse to spend some time with Kagome away from her duties at the inn then he was all for it. He didn't fear it would lead to any more 'awkward' moments...he wouldn't let it. But as her friend, he wanted to spend time with her and share with her whatever wonders he could, and while he had been relieved that their routine together had immediately been 'business as usual' without any lingering awkwardness from Halloween, he would've been lying through his teeth if he'd said that her offer of spending the holiday with him away from the inn hadn't been music to his hears. If Kagome wanted to experience his 'culture' then he was all for it, and having known of the perfect place to bring her, he'd immediately issued the challenge. One he had known she would accept without a hint of hesitation.
And speaking of the unhesitant miko, she was frowning at him in that moment, her brows furrowed together in unconcealed disapproval at his noncommittal reply.
"Inuyasha, I don't think we should push it until the last minute to try and figure out what to do with you during your human nights." she said. "We both know you can't stay out in the forest, and even though anywhere on my property would be safe for you because of the barrier, I'm hardly going to banish you to the storage shed."
Sighing, Inuyasha met Kagome's eyes understandingly before confessing to the only solution he could honestly see.
"I'll just have to go somewhere else for those nights, just like I did before meeting you. I've still got enough money on me for several more nights in some other hotel somewhere. Then once your guests all leave I could come back if you still wanted me to."
Relenting that it was a logical solution, that didn't mean Kagome had to like it. Besides, there was a flaw in his logic.
"But how is that fair to you, truly? It's okay for you to be my friend and to live at my inn only so long as nobody else is around?"
He opened his mouth to protest but Kagome silenced him with a raise of her hand.
"Yeah, I know...you're concerned for my sake, in case word should get out that I harbor youkai. I appreciate your concern, but your solution is temporary at best. Even assuming you can find yourself lodging elsewhere without issue, which we both know you were having difficulty with since most places these days require IDs and credit cards, what will you do when you run out of money? Staying with me for free, it's not costing you anything, but you're not earning yourself any new money, either, and I can't afford to rent hotel rooms for you."
"I would never ask you to pay for a hotel room for me." Inuyasha stated immediately.
"I have a solution that wouldn't cost either of us a single yen."
Raising an eyebrow at the way Kagome's cheeks immediately darkened at her statement, Inuyasha wasn't sure he wanted to know, asking hesitantly, "Y-yeah?"
Clearing her throat, Kagome stated with conviction, "You could share my room."
His cheeks flared at her words, darkening to match the fire-rat robes he was currently wearing.
"Uh..."
"Just think about it." Kagome spoke up before he could argue. "You're the first true friend I've had since moving out of Tokyo, and I know for you it's been far longer. I do consider you my friend, Inuyasha, although as my friend you deserve total honestly, and I...well, if I am to be completely honest with you, I...like you, a lot. I would be open to the idea of us becoming more than friends."
"Kagome..." he sighed, having feared this moment would come. "I...don't think that's a good idea."
Hurt, a little, but still feeling a bit of optimism in that he didn't outright reject the possibility or tell her he didn't feel the same way, Kagome knew that the last thing she wanted to do was risk damaging their friendship by pushing him into something he wasn't ready for. At least by letting him know how she felt she'd taken the necessary step on her part to ensure she didn't just sit back to wait and see if anything ever happened between them. She could only imagine that he would be reluctant to approach her with feelings of his own if he feared that she could never see him that way, so now he wouldn't have that worry, at least. Hopefully, Inuyasha would also have the courage to take the steps necessary to make his own destiny, but that was a concern for another time. Presently, the concern of what to do regarding his human nights during the months her inn would be booked solid was a legitimate issue, regardless of their current relationship status.
"Well...my feelings for you are not going to change..." she began, mentally grimacing at the way he visibly cringed, as if afraid of how to reject her without hurting her feelings. Still...being a miko meant that she had a special knack for reading people, and she couldn't miss the sad longing in the back of his eyes, as if his answer was no but at the same time he wished that it wasn't. "But I don't want to weird you out or strain our friendship..." Kagome quickly continued then, figuring it would be best for the time being to focus on the more important issue at hand. She could psychoanalyze Inuyasha's emotions another day. "So you are my friend, first and foremost, and if that's all you want to be, then that's all you'll be. But as my friend, I will not kick you out of my home, Inuyasha, especially not during your human nights. If you choose to spend most nights out in the forest during my busy season, that is your prerogative, but you would be welcome at anytime, whether or not somebody might have suspicions regarding your youkai blood. I understand where your concerns along those lines are coming from, but I have a lot of repeat cliental who I don't think would turn on me for suspecting such a thing. At the very least, if you came back one night a month during the new moon, you could sneak in through my window shortly before sunset. As my friend, my bedroom is your sanctuary, Inuyasha. It doesn't have to mean anything more. I have a TV in my room, after all, so in truth it would be no different from our other new moons together, staying up and watching TV all night. And hell, if you're worried about somebody else sensing your youki, then you don't even have to sneak in through the window. You could just wait until after sunset and stroll right on in through the front door for all I care, hanging out for dinner until it's time to go to bed."
He snorted at that, an amused smirk creeping up the edges of his lips.
"And let your guests think you had some sort of sordid love affair going on? That some traveling businessman came to meet you one night a month? They would probably assume I was married and cheating on my wife with you."
It was Kagome's turn to merely shrug at his words.
"Let 'em think whatever they want." she replied after a moment, having given the matter some genuine thought and deciding that she didn't care. "That's certainly a less harmful rumor than word getting out that I 'harbor youkai', as you put it." she pointed out. "I don't agree with society, but I'm not stupid. I did ask Shippou-chan and the others to steer clear of the inn whenever I have guests..."
Pausing a moment to truly think about her own double standard, Kagome suddenly developed a strong look behind her eyes that caught Inuyasha off guard.
"Maybe I should revoke that policy, as well."
"What are you saying?"
"If you're so worried about my reputation as an Inn Keeper who favors youkai, maybe I should play up that angle, instead, build a shrine to Inari and allow the kitsune's presence to be known. Most people do not fear kitsune and I doubt it would hurt my income very much. While I might lose some customers, I might very well gain some others, people actually wishing to interact with the kits. Then if Yukiyama Inn became known for being youkai-friendly, you wouldn't have to worry about somebody suspecting you weren't entirely human, yourself.
"Youkai friendly and hanyou friendly are two very different things."
"So keep your hat on. I'm not going to 'out' you as a hanyou."
He just blinked at her, completely taken aback by all she'd said. By all she'd said, though he was relieved she had let that part of the conversation go without a struggle. He just...wasn't ready, and besides, he was firm in his conviction that to give in to his desires would be condemning her to a life of ridicule and scorn. He couldn't do that to her. He did have feelings for Kagome, and it was for that reason that he couldn't allow anything to happen between them. He didn't honestly think he'd ever be ready for that kind of a relationship, unless the universe suddenly shifted and hanyou were welcomed among humans with open arms. How could he ever have a normal relationship, being a half-man/half-beast monster in a world that would either banish him, kill him, or lock him away for the purposes of 'science' if he ever got caught trying to live as a human?
But that glum outlook on life aside, the fact that Kagome was so openly willing to consider him such a true, dear friend...
"You'd...you'd really be willing to...to openly accept youkai in the face of persecution, just for my sake?"
"Times have changed, Inuyasha, and I don't think I would receive as harsh of criticism as you fear, but yes, I would."
"What if your business disappears and your Bed and Breakfast fails?"
She shrugged again.
"I know Obaa-chan would be proud of me for standing up for what I believe in. I wouldn't be homeless because I still own the Higurashi Shrine back in Tokyo, and we could just relocate there, dismissing the stand-in shrine keepers."
"W-we?!"
Blushing again, Kagome suddenly realized that it was rather presumptuous of her to assume he would be willing to move to Tokyo just to continue living with her, but then again, it would still mean free room and board as far as he was concerned, so why wouldn't he? So they weren't boyfriend and girlfriend, they were friends, and he had already told her three nights ago that he would stay with her simply because she wanted him to. That was proof enough that he at least honestly returned her friendship, if he didn't have any desire to be away from her and was therefore so willing to remain in her presence upon her request.
The hanyou was lost in similar thoughts, realizing that he would indeed relocate to Tokyo with her if she were ever forced to make such a move, especially since he had already planned on Tokyo being his immediate destination when and if things had ever stopped working out with her.
I guess all things really do happen as they were meant to... he thought then, smirking a bit in memory of his old friend Miroku. The monk would've told him to give a relationship with Kagome a try. Maybe...one day...but he would give her plenty of time to realize what a horrible mistake choosing him would really be.
Shaking his head with a silly grin climbing its way up his lips, Inuyasha finally relented to her proposition. The one about the new moon, that is.
"Okay, I suppose I can crash in your room during the new moon, just...don't do anything foolish in the public eye, like announcing your allegiance with forest youkai."
Chuckling a bit, Kagome stuck out her hand to be shook in the Western tradition as she stated "Deal." grinning when Inuyasha shook her hand firmly in contract.
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It was less than two months later, on Christmas Eve of all nights, that they found themselves coping with the awkward 'just friends' arrangement of her solution for the first time. With the first snowfalls starting in late autumn Kagome had already started to notice a rise in business, and she was always booked solid for Christmas Eve, since young couples liked to get away for a night of fairytale romance in the enchanted setting that was her secluded patch of forest. It was only a coincidence, though unfortunately an unavoidable one, that this year, Christmas Eve fell on the night of the new moon.
Even as the late autumn nights had continued to grow colder and colder, during the increasingly frequent occasions that Kagome had a guest for a night or two, Inuyasha had had no problem slipping out into the darkness, sticking to the forest like the kitsune, but Kagome was right, there was no way he could stay outdoors during his human night. Not even within the safety of her barrier...not with the current nighttime temperatures.
Apprehensive over whether or not any of her guests might just possess the ability to sense youki, Inuyasha chose to wait until after sunset to make his approach. Feeling beyond awkward, he approached her front door and entered as if he had every right in the world to be there, which in reality he did, although it still felt like he was an outsider while the place was echoing with the conversation and laughter of her other guests. Because the days were shorter now, they hadn't yet eaten. Just getting ready for dinner, Kagome had prepared her guests for his appearance by mentioning casually that a friend of hers would be joining them. Nobody really cared all that much about the Inn Keeper's personal business and so nobody commented beyond polite Okay's of acknowledgment. When Inuyasha walked in, Kagome was thankfully there to greet him warmly once he entered the main living room, saying "I'm so glad you could make it!" like he was an old friend she hadn't seen in ages. Not knowing what to say to play along he merely answered "Keh." and Kagome then went on to tell him that dinner would be ready shortly.
Noticing after only a few minutes that nobody seemed to be paying his appearance any attention after the polite introductions were over, as the three couples present all seemed to be into each other much more than Kagome's business, Inuyasha felt some of the tension melt out of him as he relaxed, truly enjoying his chicken dinner. Kagome's homemade Christmas Cake was also wonderful, though the seasonal desert reminded the hanyou-turned-human of her previous dig regarding her upcoming twenty-sixth birthday, back from when they'd first met. It was an old, derogatory term used to refer to women over twenty-five, calling them Christmas Cake, since the pastry expired on that date. As delicious as Christmas Cake was, nobody wanted any after the 25th, any left-over unsold cakes in the stores going bad as nobody would buy them. Supposedly, nobody wanted a woman over twenty-five years old, either, though he wasn't so sure he believed in that statistic. Her birthday was another couple of months away yet, but he did not truly believe that she would 'spoil' on that day. There was a man out there for her, somewhere, there had to be. How could anyone not want Kagome? Ignoring the pang he felt in his heart at the thought, Inuyasha continued to eat his meal in silence.
With each of her guests fortunately retiring to their separate rooms shortly after dinner, no doubt for some quality 'alone' time with their chosen partners, it was with a light blush staining his nose and cheeks that Inuyasha allowed Kagome to lead him back into her own bedroom. In the nearly four months that he had been living with her, he had seen inside her bedroom before, on several occasions in fact, Kagome often leaving the door open as she dusted or put away her laundry. Many times they had spent most of the day talking while she'd been going about her daily chores, and Inuyasha had found himself in her room on more than one occasion, chitchatting with the miko about whatever they happened to be discussing while she changed her linens or dusted the furniture. He didn't just sit back and watch, of course, often helping her with her chores. In fact, since Inuyasha had moved in Kagome had not once cleaned a single window, Inuyasha adopting that, and several other of the more 'manly' chores around the inn. He had stated that it was the least he could do to earn his keep since she was letting him stay with her for free, and Kagome hadn't bothered to protest, honestly appreciating the assistance.
So walking into Kagome's bedroom in and of itself was not awkward for Inuyasha on that night, but for some reason, the notion of actually sharing her bed was making him extremely uncomfortable. Kagome didn't have any other furniture in her bedroom that could be used for sleep, no couch or chair for him to stay on, and the floor was out of the question. Not that Inuyasha ever slept during his human night, anyway. Kagome had already told him that she didn't mind staying up with him, and that he could sit up in bed with her and they could watch TV. She had tried to make the matter as unawkward as possible, and he appreciated her effort, but he had never before sat on Kagome's bed, finding that particular piece of furniture just a bit too intimate to touch, and approaching it now, his cheeks flamed as he placed his hand upon the comforter.
"It's not going to bite you." Kagome teased, giggling behind her hand at the way he jumped at her words, spinning around as though he'd been caught doing something highly inappropriate.
"Inuyasha, relax. Sheesh, it's not like I'm going to rape you."
For some reason, her crude sexual joke actually relaxed him. His attraction to her notwithstanding, Kagome was his friend, first and foremost.
"Keh, don't sound so disappointed." he dared tease in return, earning himself another laugh from the girl who hadn't once mentioned anything of her stronger feelings for him since Culture Day. He was sure her feelings for him hadn't changed since then, but the fact that she was willing to continue on with their friendship unaltered meant a lot to him. Kagome then climbed into bed and he easily followed suit, the pair taking up residence above her blankets as she grabbed the remote and clicked on her TV.
Staying up with him all night during the new moon had become a tradition Kagome had mastered, no longer falling asleep as she had that first night. But this was the first new moon in which she had other guests sleeping under her roof. She would need to get up early in order to fix them breakfast. Upon voicing this concern, Kagome waved off his worries stating that she simply didn't plan on getting any sleep at all. It wasn't going to kill her to miss one night of sleep a month.
"Besides," she added with a smirk, "Isn't the rumor going to be that you're my lover who travels here once a month on 'business' away from his wife and kids? If I'm dead on my feet the following morning like I didn't get much sleep, that won't really seem unexpected, now will it?"
"Oh, so now I'm a deadbeat dad too, instead of just a cheating husband?" he asked, sending her a playful wink.
"I'm sure you'd make a wonderful father." Kagome stated unexpectedly, a light pink dusting her nose as she immediately focused her attention on the remote control in her hands, flipping through the channels rapidly.
He wasn't sure what to say after that that wouldn't make the moment even more awkward, so he waited until Kagome paused on a potential TV program, chuckling lightly at the people on the screen and telling her that that show would do just fine for now. It was some comedic interview show, and while he had no idea who the people were being interviewed, or really who the host even was, he didn't care. With the awkwardness of the moment behind them, Inuyasha found himself honestly enjoying Kagome's company, his human emotions rearing their ugly head, but in a manageable setting. The rest of the night went by uneventfully, Kagome and Inuyasha chuckling quietly at the random things they found interesting to watch during such odd hours of the night. Once dawn made its pending arrival known with the brightening of the Eastern sky, Kagome and Inuyasha each tiptoed their way back out into the living room, under the pretence of her seeing him off just on the off chance of one of her other guests already being awake. With the coast clear, Inuyasha ventured out past the hibernating vegetable garden, finding a secure spot to crouch out of sight behind the shed for the three minutes it took the sun to breech the horizon. Transforming back into his hanyou self he hightailed it out of there in case one of her guests was a spiritualist. If they were, then they would've only gotten a random glimpse of youki, a phenomenon that was not all that uncommon in a place so close to the forest.
Sighing in relief at the feel of his youki's return immediately followed by its departure, knowing it meant that he had safely reentered the surrounding woods in his hanyou form, Kagome headed into the kitchen to begin that day's breakfast preparations.
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How do I fucking get myself into these situations?
"And what do you do for a living, Yoshi-san?"
It was the first name he could think of that was even remotely similar to his own. He didn't want to risk picking a fake name he'd forget halfway into the night.
"Freelance handyman and landscaping."
No sense in complicating things with unnecessary lies he would need to remember later, as well.
"Do you have a business card?"
What businessman in Japan *doesn't* have a business card? Oh wait, that's right, me..." the hanyou-turned-human thought sarcastically, stating apologetically to the woman, "I'm afraid I just ran out."
Fortunately, the woman he'd been speaking with walked away after that, no doubt finding him unprofessional if he had allowed himself to run out of business cards. For a second there, he had been worried she was going to ask him for his cell phone number instead, since she had pulled out her phone and glanced at it before politely excusing herself. Spotting Kagome from across the room and signaling her with his eyes that he needed help, the hostess of the evening politely excused herself from her present conversation after a moment to make it back to Inuyasha's side.
Things were always crazy during the winter season, and this year was no exception. While the ski lodges further into town usually housed the teenagers wanting to taste fresh powder, her classical 'at home' feeling usually drew small families wishing for their children to experience snow for the first time, while avoiding the crazy ruckus of skiers and snowboarders. It was just a little past sunset on the evening of the new moon and Kagome had a full house, two families with children and one elderly couple completely maxing out her occupancy, and then some. While making sure the kids were all settled in front of the TV with one of the mothers, Inuyasha had ended up finding himself trapped in conversation with the other one, though the woman had seemed friendly enough, just trying to be polite since Inuyasha wasn't hanging out with the other guys. Of course, there was a reason for that, but the hanyou wasn't so rude as to tell the woman to her face to leave him alone, and so he'd fumbled through the best he could, relieved that it was over now as she joined the other mother and their children watching television while Kagome joined him by his side.
"How are you holding up?" she asked him, smiling in sympathy when he responded with a noncommittal "Feh."
"It's almost over." she assured him, in reference to the time he had to spend 'socializing' with her other guests.
Later at dinner Kagome merely introduced 'Yoshi' as her friend to those who hadn't yet officially met him, and once again nobody seemed to care, which made it three for three since their first new moon together in the company of strangers back on Christmas Eve. Kagome occasionally still kicked herself for having let the majesty of the romantic holiday pass them by unexploited, but even though she knew what she wanted and knew that it was up to her to get it, she also didn't want to push Inuyasha into anything he wasn't ready for. She had already told him that she would like to be more than friends, and he'd said he didn't think it was a good idea. Of course, that wasn't a no, she reminded herself, although it definitely wasn't a yes, either. There was no doubt in Kagome's mind by that point in time that she was in love with him, but it was for that very reason that she wouldn't shove her feelings in his face if he honestly didn't feel the same way. She was certain that Inuyasha knew she still had those types of feelings for him, although she supposed it was possible he presumed it was just a silly crush on her part. At first, she had honestly found herself wondering the same thing, back when she'd first started to notice how much he seemed to mean to her. Kagome had allowed herself the time necessary to know with finality whether or not her developing feelings for him were legitimate or merely a symptom of her loneliness. By the time Halloween had come around, there had no longer been any doubt in her mind; she knew she loved him. As for his feelings for her, she couldn't be certain, but she was still suspicious that he too felt something deeper for her than friendship. But merely having certain feelings and feeling able to act upon them were two very different things, and Kagome understood that. While the miko did believe that it was up to her to open the door, nowhere was it written that you had to crash through any closed doors in your path going a hundred miles an hour, ramming them open with your shoulder and stumbling through without looking and without thinking of the consequences. She would be the one to open the closed doors before her, but she would do so slowly and carefully, peaking inside to make sure there was nothing on the other side not yet ready for her to see it. She did believe he had feelings for her, but she also knew he wasn't ready to reveal them just yet. Crashing inside unexpectedly could have dire consequences, including her getting thrown out and having the proverbial door slammed shut in her face. Perhaps if she merely knocked on the door on occasion, then one day, he would open it for her himself, inviting her in.
Retiring to bed that night happened peacefully, despite the ruckus of the full house. Perhaps his fears over a rumor starting regarding Kagome's loose morals had been ungrounded, after all. Whatever the case may be, nobody seemed to care when things began winding down for the evening and he didn't yet appear to be leaving, instead helping their hostess tidy up in the kitchen. If some people were still awake when he and Kagome retired for the evening, hearing him follow her into her bedroom, nobody said anything about it the following morning. Or at least, Kagome didn't admit to him that anybody had said anything the following morning, since he was obviously not there to have faced the guests himself. He was never there to face the music with her guests the 'morning after', not that such a notion would've kept him away if he could've otherwise been there. It was always possible that an early riser could be outside enjoying a cigarette or something and completely catch him in the act of 'sneaking' out, but it was a small risk and one he was willing to take. The greater danger was staying past his transformation; he could not risk any of her guests sensing the return of his youki, so leaving in the predawn light while he was still human was a necessity, whether or not he might ever one day get 'caught'.
Having gotten used to the idea of staying up with Kagome on his human nights, watching TV in her bedroom, by the time winter started hinting at spring with the appearance of cherry blossoms, Inuyasha was actually looking forward to the moonless night rather than dreading the awkwardness it had once entailed. After all, during her business season he only got to see her on those few nights, and only seeing her for one night a month, and even having to share her with others for the first part of those nights, was something he definitely found less than favorable. Still, what could he do? He absolutely refused to risk exposing himself as a youkai in front of her guests, for her sake, not his own. But so since he couldn't transform himself into a human at will, that left him out of options except to wait until his human night during the busy part of the year. The rest of the time, he kept himself occupied by playing with the kitsune. He suspected they had since become aware of his monthly transformation, themselves, since it was kind of hard to miss for any being who could sense youki within a reasonable distance, though the foxes did good by never mentioning it if they did know. There had even been a few times that he and Shippou had ventured outward on a perimeter sweep, sometimes discovering a lowly, creepy youkai that he would then disband before it could become a problem, encroaching so close to human territory. The fox cub definitely didn't have a problem with him being half human, and Shippou had even admitted to admiring Inuyasha's strength at those times, stating that he hoped to one day become as strong as him. It was true that Inuyasha's youki was stronger than all of the young kitsune combined, but it was not impossible for a single fox to grow as strong as he was. Kitsune daiyoukai were rare, but not impossible, and ruffling up the boy's hair, he'd told Shippou that he had faith in him to one day become a nine-tailed fox, which would match, if not even surpass Inuyasha's current level of power. The kit had smiled up at him with unshed tears of happiness in his eyes, before transforming himself with a *pop* into a duplicate of the silver-haired hanyou, slapping him on the arm and yelling "You're it!" before turning and bolting deeper into the snowy forest. Chuckling, Inuyasha had shaken his head in amusement before giving chase.
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In full bloom, the sakura trees looked especially magnificent that year, thanks to Inuyasha's pruning job, every single dead branch, hell, every dead twig all completely cleared away. Kagome received several compliments on the trees, though she always gave the credit to her friend 'Yoshi' whenever asked who her gardener was. Nobody ever saw anyone working on the trees, though Kagome had sensed him when he'd come by to do the job. Just because her inn was booked solid every night didn't mean her guests all just hung around the inn all day long without going off to do anything, so he'd been able to sneak back to the property a few times to take care of the trees closest to the house while everyone had been out skiing or having lunch, keeping an ear cocked for the sound of approaching vehicles so that he could take off before being spotted. He took care of the trees planted further away from the main house in the middle of the night when everyone was sleeping, figuring that if somebody actually managed to sense him and wake up, he'd be long gone by the time they ran outside to see where 'the youkai' was, though that thankfully never happened. Finished with his task, the trees were magnificent. Of course, the life of a cherry blossom was fleeting, a reminder of the mortality of all things, though when they started to fall Kagome did not think of it as a metaphor for the swiftness of her own life in comparison to Inuyasha's. In fact, she dried and pickled many of the blossoms to keep for future use in tea or cooking, a symbol of preserving the memory of an item's beauty and importance even beyond its original life expectancy. She wondered if Inuyasha's thoughts ran along similar lines, or if she was just being a silly, sentimental girl. One thing was for certain, though, that being that pretty soon, she would be able to find out Inuyasha's thoughts on that, or any other endless number of topics for herself, at any time of the month. Her season was ending; soon she would have no more guests chasing her precious hanyou away.
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Sighing in relief, Inuyasha adjusted his position concealed on a tall pine tree overlooking the Yukiyama Inn. The blossoms were dying off, the breathtakingly beautiful pale pink and white petals becoming overshadowed one-by-one by the standard green tones of foliage. Inuyasha smiled to himself with the knowledge that Kagome's 'season' was finally, officially over, the sakura followers having come in hordes only to depart once more as they continued onward towards Hokkaido.
He knew there would continue to still be the random guest from time to time, some travelers, be they foreign tourists or otherwise, who happened to be in their area and who preferred the more homey feel of a private Bed and Breakfast to one of the nearby vacation lodges, but it was unlikely that such infrequent occurrences would continue to coincide with the new moon, and even if they did, that wouldn't really be an issue since he'd already gotten used to the ploy of 'arriving' at Kagome's inn after sunset on those nights. Any other night of the month he'd just stay out in the forest with the kitsune like he'd already been doing all winter. He was just looking forward to finally being able to spend at least most of his days with Kagome again, having breakfast with her in the kitchen and helping her around the house with her chores. Only seeing her one night a month for five months had sucked balls, but now, finally, he would more or less have her all to himself for the next seven months. It did briefly cross the hanyou's mind that it seemed out of character for him to have been so willing to stick around in that same area of forest all throughout winter and into the spring, just so that he could now once again spend most of his days with Kagome, when the old him always tried to avoid prolonged human contact as much as possible and only did what he needed to in order to survive, but he had stopped trying to analyze himself and his feelings for the miko a long time ago. If there was one thing he'd learned about himself during his month-long separations from Kagome, it was that he didn't want to be separated from Kagome. She was special to him, and he didn't give a damn what his old policies used to be. Kagome was his friend; she knew what he was and she accepted him for it. Why the hell would he have wanted to voluntarily walk away from that? And even though spending his human nights at her inn having to socialize with her other guests during dinner before sitting up beside her intimately close on her small bed while trying to concentrate on the TV had been awkward and uncomfortable, at first, he'd gotten used to it. Her idea had kept him safe, bottom line, not to mention allowing him to see her for at least that one night a month during her busy season when he otherwise wouldn't have seen her at all had he temporarily moved away to a different location. Plus, he still had his seven months worth of money in his backpack, not having spent a single yen on anything at all since paying Kagome for those first three nights. That was a miraculous eight moon cycles in which he'd had free shelter. He might criticize himself for letting his wall down and falling for Kagome, but even his most deeply imbedded self-preservation instincts agreed with the idea of staying somewhere safe and free for as long as possible. His heart might be the victim of collateral damage, but falling in love with Kagome was definitely the lesser of two evils.
Oh yes, there was no doubt about it; he was in love with the miko. But he had learned his lesson the first time around, and while he continued to tell himself that he wasn't still hung up over Kikyou's hurtful words, it was merely the wisdom of learning from history lest it repeat itself, he did know that things could never possibly work out between himself and Kagome. Why risk destroying what they already had? What did he expect her to do, evict her lover out into the forest for five months out of the year?
Yeah, right... he snorted to himself.
No, Inuyasha knew that Kagome had feelings for him, and he knew that the foolish wench would probably put her entire livelihood on the line to defend him. If they ever actually did get together, then he was sure she would insist that he stay with her all year long, and that would be a one-way ticket to disaster as far as her business was concerned. While bedding with youkai wasn't an arrestable offence, society would consider her depraved. She would be branded as a sexual deviant. Plus, any offspring they might conceive wouldn't be considered human and would be in the same boat he currently found himself in; he could never do that to a child. A relationship with Kagome was simply out of the question, no matter how desperately a part of him might wish otherwise.
Still, knowing that she cared for him warmed his heart. It was worth putting up with five months of solitude in order to spend seven months in her presence. That was over half the year that he got to spend with her, and considering he had pretty much spent his entire life in solitude since leaving the taijiya village - staying with strangers who had no idea what he was wasn't exactly his idea of companionship - then seven months out of the year was a vast improvement in his book. Even during his five months away from Kagome, it wasn't really like he'd been completely alone, often hanging out with Shippou and the other kitsune. During the nights of heavy snowfall they had even let him sleep in their den with them. Finding acceptance from forest youkai was about as rare for him as finding acceptance from humans, and he was positive it was Kagome's influence that had caused them to welcome him with a sort of 'any friend of Kagome's' kind of mentality, not that he was going to complain.
Observing from his perch as Kagome's last guest exited the inn before departing in their car, he waited until they were out of sight up the road before leaping down from his hiding spot. He covered the distance from the tree line to her front door in less than five seconds, and he wasn't surprised when the front door opened at his approach, a smiling miko greeting him in the doorway.
"I thought they'd never leave." Inuyasha said with a crooked smirk, wiping his feet before strolling inside.
"Have you eaten yet?" Kagome asked as she headed with him into the main room.
"And spoil my appetite? Your cooking is far superior to mine."
"What cooking?" she teased. "I never once saw any smoke rising up through the trees."
He grinned, knowing she knew that he had been eating his catches raw, and also knowing that it didn't bother her. It wasn't necessarily that he preferred his meat raw, but he could stomach it without complaint and he hadn't wanted to risk drawing attention to his existence with a fire. "My point exactly. So what's for breakfast?"
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Like riding a bicycle, it was second nature for Kagome and Inuyasha to settle back into their preestablished routine, not that there was truly anything 'routine' about their arrangement, for either of them. Kagome had never before had a steady roommate living with her, not since her grandmother's passing, and Inuyasha had never before been anyone's steady roommate. He had always, always merely been 'the handyman' or 'the help' or 'the runaway' or 'the charity case' or whatever else any of his temporary hosts would secretly label him when they thought he couldn't hear their words. Some people had been nicer about it than others, but fundamentally his living situation had always been the same. He would present himself honestly upfront as a nomad and ask if there was any work they needed done around the house either in exchange for cash, a place to crash for a few nights, or both. He usually had more success with elderly couples, ironically, even if one would think it should be the old timers who would be more likely to point at him and scream 'youkai'. Though statistically he was sure that was probably accurate, it was also the old timers who more often than not had repair work they needed done around the house that they were incapable of doing themselves, and thanks to the reputation of 'kids these days', in recent years he was usually brushed off as being nothing more than a rebel punk. He had even been accused of 'dressing up' as a youkai, thinking it was 'cool' to wear fake claws and fangs.
His situation with Kagome was definitely unique.
Even though he had been accepted as a hanyou among the taijiya, it had been a completely different time back then, and he'd definitely had to earn his keep. Not that it'd been a problem; he loved the hunt and had taken to slaying beastly youkai alongside his human brethren with ease, but he'd definitely had a duty to uphold, a purpose to fulfill. Not that his life with Kagome was without purpose, but it was just an entirely different purpose than anything he was used to. All he had to do to earn his keep with Kagome was...stay with Kagome. She wanted him with her, and he didn't have to do anything in order to keep her from changing her mind and deciding he'd worn out his welcome. He hadn't felt that accepted, that welcomed and 'at home' since his mother died.
As for the miko, she too was treading entirely new territory. Since Kaede's passing she'd gotten used to living alone, though that wasn't to say she enjoyed being by herself. In fact, Kagome felt relieved to have another person in her home, filling her once lonely days with companionship once more. But was that the only reason she longed for Inuyasha's company? No, she knew her feelings for him were genuine, even if he didn't feel the same way. Being separated from him all throughout winter and early spring except for his human nights had only reaffirmed for the miko what she knew in her heart to be true. She didn't 'get over' her 'silly crush' during his absence, and she never would, because as much as the logical part of her mind might actually wish otherwise, she knew her feelings for him were much deeper than a mere crush. She loved him. She had loved him since before her busy season had started, and now that it was over, she still loved him. Her heart wasn't going to change.
Be that as it may, it was surprisingly unawkward for the pair as they each went about their daily lives. Inuyasha reclaimed his chosen bedroom, and once again took the liberty of making sure Kagome's freezer was fully stocked with less common meats and fish. Getting her vegetable garden going again was an annual task that Kagome always took pride in, and she was grateful for the company and assistance this time around as she planted her seedlings. Finally buying the buckets of paint to take care of the last remaining item on her to-do list for Inuyasha, the hanyou fulfilled his promise of repainting the exterior of her home, which he finished in a single day's time, and he also took it upon himself to thoroughly examine her roof to make sure there weren't any weak spots sneaking up on them.
One evening a single traveler showed up at random, much like how Inuyasha himself had arrived that first night with no prior phone call, though his superior senses alerted him to the visitor in time to inform Kagome before sneaking out the back. The miko was disappointed to have her evening with Inuyasha interrupted, but the reality of the matter was that it was her business, and she couldn't very well turn the paying customer away when she could definitely use the extra money, and so she showed the man to one of her two spare bedrooms and kept her frown on the inside.
Cooking extra food for dinner than what was truly necessary for two people, Kagome waited until after her impromptu houseguest excused himself for the evening before sneaking outside with a third plate of food wrapped in foil. Heading into the forest, she let her senses be her guide, and it didn't take long for Inuyasha to meet her half way once he realized she was approaching. He'd gotten used to the feel of her aura against his youki and could actually feel her approach even before he could smell or hear her.
"What are ya doing out here, woman?" he greeted with a sideways grin.
"I brought you dinner." she explained as she held up her offering.
She hadn't snuck out into the forest at night during the winter. For one thing it'd been far too cold for her, and with the nearly constant cloud cover overhead it had also been too dark to see properly; she could've gotten lost, and in temperatures below freezing that was no laughing matter. Plus, with a constant full house, usually including rambunctious children, she'd honestly also felt uneasy about leaving them all by themselves should somebody have needed her for something. This one single man she felt relatively safe leaving to his own devices for a few minutes.
"Well, t-thank you." Inuyasha replied to her unexpected gesture with a light blush, deciding not to fight with her on it. "Now get your butt back inside before he notices you've gone missing." he chastised, only half kidding. He didn't like the idea of her sneaking out into the woods to see him while she had guests and he hoped she wouldn't make a habit out of it. What if they realized she was running off to see a youkai?
Sticking her tongue out at him playfully, Kagome winked before turning tail and darting back towards her inn, knowing that he was right in that she shouldn't be gone for too long in case her absence was discovered. Fortunately all was quiet when she made her way back inside, her guest still in his room for the night with his door closed. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary. Telling herself that the sooner she went to bed the sooner it would become morning, Kagome retied for the night. When morning arrived as predicted, the miko politely prepared her guest the breakfast items of his choosing and then she bid him a pleasant farewell as he continued on his way. His departure was followed a short time later by Inuyasha's arrival, and Kagome greeted him at the door with a warm smile and a hot cup of coffee.
Days turned into weeks and before they knew it, it was once again the night of the new moon. Having assumed without seeking confirmation that Inuyasha would want to resume their original position of staying up all night out in the living room, on the couch, it came as a complete shock to Kagome when upon handing him the giant bowl of popcorn she'd made while making a grab for the sodas, he proceeded to head down the hallway towards her bedroom. Surprised but also delighted, she didn't dare say anything to point out her quandary and instead immediately followed after him, plopping herself down on the bed after setting down their drinks on the nightstand. Whether an unconscious act of repetition, or a deliberate, subtle display of accepting the advanced level of their friendship and not wishing to take any steps backwards, Inuyasha's behavior brought a warm feeling of happiness bubbling up in Kagome's chest as he merely crawled into bed beside her, placing the large bowl of popcorn between them as he made a grab for the remote.
The truth was that Inuyasha knew what he was doing, or so he told himself, at least. He had debated momentarily with himself over whether or not he should head for the couch or her bedroom, but had finally decided to grant Kagome this one symbol of closeness. To return to the couch now that they were alone would imply that he had only been willing to be in such close quarters with her out of necessity, and while that had been the only reason, at first, things were different now. He didn't realize just how different until it was too late.
Stumbling upon a documentary on the origins of some species of youkai, they were each fascinated by the scientists' explanations for how highly concentrated levels of ki in certain beings could work towards converting their mortal bodies into what has become commonly referred to as the blanket term of youkai. How even normal animals like common household pets could gain seemingly magical abilities if given the opportunity to hone and develop such powers. They also went on to explain that those animals, once converted into youkai, were also capable of passing on their advanced state of being through reproduction, like a highly concentrated evolutionary trait being passed down through their genes, meaning that the offspring of a demonic animal would in turn be a demonic animal itself instead of a mortal one, which would then of course grow up to be even stronger than its parents, continuing the process onward until an entirely separate species of youkai existed independently from its mortal cousins. They described it in kin to how domesticated species of dogs were originally bread down from wolves, and how each new puppy of a litter is not born a wolf like their ancestors but instead is born as another member of the mutated breed of canine as their parents.
Finding it all very interesting, Kagome asked Inuyasha, with all sincerity and honest curiosity, if he knew if his father had once upon a time been a mortal dog himself who had developed into a youkai either through sheer strength or possibly even inugami manipulation by a human master, or if he had been from a preestablished line of demonic inu-youkai, born with his demonic powers as Inuyasha himself had been.
"I...I don't know." the hanyou-turned-human answered her honestly, turning his head to look Kagome's way with large, blinking eyes. "I mean, he'd been over a thousand years old, so I guess it's possible he'd started out as somebody's inugami or something. I do know that while he could turn himself into a humanoid, his true form was a giant white dog, and he obviously had a fondness for humans."
The miko merely nodded her head, taking it all in stride that it was quite possible the biological father of the man currently sharing her bed had been born a normal, unintelligent, mortal dog.
"You...you're really not disturbed by all this?" he asked her hesitantly while waving his hand towards the television, his human emotions getting the better of him as his imbedded insecurities slowly rose to the surface.
"Inuyasha..." Kagome started in a soothing tone, a look of understanding shining in her stormy eyes as she muted the TV before placing a comforting hand on his arm. "The scientists even say that us humans were evolved from lower forms of primates. So why should it matter to me if it took millions of years or one generation? You are most certainly my intellectual equal. And if you want to say that we as mankind are the chosen race and were created specifically by the kami, well then the same argument still stands that so are youkai, so you're still my equal." Offering him a warm smile, she teased, "Haven't you gotten it through that thick canine skull of yours that I don't think of you any differently?"
Offering the arm she was touching a gentle squeeze, Kagome smiled as she saw Inuyasha visibly relax, but then something strange happened. The warmth shining her way in his chocolate eyes seemed to grow even hotter, almost as if he were looking at her with the same type of love she knew she felt for him in her heart. The next thing the miko knew, she was leaning herself sideways, wanting nothing more than to finally taste the lips that looked oh-so-kissable in that moment.
Inuyasha was truly touched by Kagome's words; even her crack about the density of his skull had him quietly chuckling to himself. Finding himself basking in the warmth of her unconditional acceptance, Inuyasha continued gazing to his left at the woman sitting beside him with nothing but love in his heart. How he loved that woman. But Inuyasha was perfectly content to merely stare into Kagome's eyes, to allow his feelings for her to wrap his heart in a blanket of peace and tranquility. He was not expecting those stormy gray-blue eyes of hers to suddenly start drifting closer, their lids slowly lowering like he was watching her fall asleep. Having let his guard down in his moment of vulnerability, Inuyasha realized too late what Kagome was actually doing, and when he felt her soft, petal perfect lips pressed smoothly against his own, he lost it.
"No!" he snapped, pulling himself away, much to the shock and hurt of the woman beside him.
Recoiling as if she'd been slapped, Kagome looked on the verge of tears as she tore her gaze away from him, turning her head while contemplating how much of her dignity would remain if she ran out of the room. Cringing and audibly cursing himself, Inuyasha reacted without thinking as he immediately placed his hand on her shoulder.
"Kagome, wait..." he spoke up softly, his tone apologetic.
"You don't need to say anything." she murmured dejectedly. "I understand."
Raising his hand from her shoulder to her chin and turning her head so that he could meet her eyes, his gaze was once again full of love as he told her quietly, "I don't think you do."
Grabbing the empty popcorn bowl and moving it out of the way, Inuyasha scooted himself even closer to the miko, pulling her flush against him as he wrapped his arms around her, resting his chin atop her head as she buried her face in the crook of his neck.
"It's not that I don't feel that way." he confessed after a moment, stroking her hair. "I'm only trying to protect you."
Kagome shook her head against him, trying to wrap her mind around his logic.
"Protect me from what?" she mumbled against his skin.
"Me, yourself, the world we live in, take your pick."
Sniffling, the miko raised her eyes to seek his own, a spark of challenge burning in their blue-gray depths.
"And if I insist that I just don't care? That I'm willing to do whatever it takes, endure whatever it takes, in order to be with you?"
He met her gaze head on with a challenge of his own.
"Don't force me to leave you, Kagome. I already know I would regret it for the rest of my life."
"What about giving in to your feelings? Would you regret that?"
"I would fear it."
"Haven't I already told you that you've got nothing to fear from me?"
"I would fear for you."
"Why?"
"Because I can't offer you the future that you deserve, the life you even told me yourself that you wanted."
"I thought we'd already established how plans can change, and how that old life simply isn't the path for me any more." Kagome argued. "You really think I'll just miraculously find myself a husband one day? How would I meet him? A guest staying at my inn that I fall in love with? And who are you, then, huh?"
She didn't blush at her confession. Instead, she continued to look him in the eye, daring him to challenge her on that point.
"You never know who might walk through your door one day, Kagome. The kami could have a plan for you, and you could be throwing it all away."
"So could you."
Closing his eyes, Inuyasha exhaled slowly through his nose. He was losing his will to fight her on this issue.
"If anyone ever found out, it would destroy you." he all but whispered.
"Why don't you let me worry about that?"
Snapping his eyes open, he narrowed his gaze at her, grabbing her shoulders and giving her body a little shake for emphasis.
"Don't you get it, wench?! I love you! I can't not worry about what would happen!"
With those words he pulled Kagome forward, slamming his lips down hard against her own before she even had time to process his declaration. She tried to gasp, a sound he swallowed greedily as he plundered her mouth with his tongue, pulling from her everything that she was while drawing strength from the act like a feeding incubus. The kiss ended as abruptly as it'd started, and Kagome was left panting for air, staring wide-eyed into the smoldering depths of Inuyasha's midnight orbs.
"I...you..." she tried to start after a moment, her mind a jumbled mess.
Catching her breath, Kagome immediately realized one solid truth above all others. There was challenge in Inuyasha's eyes as he stared at her, challenge that she immediately recognized, while also recognizing the unmistakable lacking of the playful glint that she was used to seeing in his gaze at such times. He was daring her to make the next move, but he was dead serious about it. Thinking back on her analogy of paths and doors, it dawned on the miko in that moment that he had answered her knocking. It was almost as if he had opened the very door of Hell, itself, even warning her that she would get burned. Now the only question that remained was, would she still pass through it?
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