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In a New Light	By : Sylean Category: InuYasha > Het - Male/Female > Naraku/Kagome Views: 17606 -:- Recommendations : 5 -:- Currently Reading : 4
Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha nor do I make any profit from this story.

Chapter List
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In a New Light

Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha nor do I make any profit from this story.

Warning: There will be lemons in this story, some non-con as well.

Chapter 41: One Bad Turn Deserves Another

(A/N: Tears incoming. Damn this chapter was hard to write. *Type type, sniffle, type type, drip, type type, blow nose.* I couldn't stop bawling.)

They talked too much; asked far too many questions that had no answers, when all that he wanted, was silence. Leaving his incarnations to their own devices, under the trusted watch of Kanna and the commanding authority of the infant, Akago, Naraku retreated to a place where none would dare bother him. There was only one who knew of this hiding place, and she… had made her choice.

He trusted her; he let her see him, really see him, and told her of things that no others even dared to ask. Yet, she still chose Inuyasha over him, just as Kikyo had. He should have seen the signs, should have known this would happen, but he chose to ignore that warning, and chose to try for her. And for what, what did he get for that effort? He could feel his insides cracking, breaking in ways he never imagined. All this power, and yet it could do nothing for this agony.

His memories came flooding back in the dark embrace of solitude. He wanted to be away from all the noise, but now that he was, he had no distraction to pull him from thoughts of her. Each pleasant reminiscence was only accompanied by the tremendous sorrow that it would never happen again, that it was over, and that it meant nothing to her. The first time he touched her, taking her innocence, but not by force; she gave herself to him willingly. No, not willingly, she was intoxicated on his miasma. He remembered painfully, the time they spent at the castle, all the conversations they had, and how her company alone left him feeling content. How badly he wanted her to come to him now, like she had that night at the castle, when he was falling into the spiraling abyss of his own thoughts; she came and pulled him back. But she would not; no matter how much he needed her, she would not come again. Why had he chosen this place to hide, was it because she would know it, and just maybe, seek him out in familiar locations? Did he want her to come? Yes, he did. Or was it because this place held memories, memories he did not want to let go of? Yes, that too. As pathetic as it was, as sentimental as it would portray him, he came here solely to think about her.

He recalled their night in the cave, the night she confessed her love, and he showed her, his. Everything had seemed so perfect, she declared he was her only, and he told her his plans for her; how he would take her as his mate once it was safe. Had she misunderstood? Did she not know the meaning in that or think is was a possessive statement? Maybe he should have just expressed it in words, even though they would not have meant as much. Maybe that's what she needed to hear, the actual words. Would that have changed anything? 'Would she have chosen me if I had simply told her that I love her?' he tormented himself. 'She looked at me the same way Kikyo looked at Inuyasha 50 years ago. I remember that vividly, but… Kikyo did not truly love Inuyasha. If she did, I would not have been able to deceive them. Kikyo loved the convenience that Inuyasha was to her. She wanted him to become something else and drug him along for protection on missions. She only wanted him because he was adjacent, just as I was to Kagome. How foolish of me to forget that! Of course Kagome never really loved me. I was just useful to her, expedient; I protected her.' He grit his teeth and hung his head at the painful realization, hoping that she had at least loved him somewhat, even if it wasn't as much as that dog. 'When I stopped protecting what she wanted, she did not hesitate to turn against me.' A scream wanted to tear its way from his throat, but he held it in. She did not deserve it; she did not deserve his concern. A rare thing to begin with, and she had tossed it aside for an unfaithful mongrel.

Where did that leave him now? He could take her by force, kidnap her and keep her as a slave or a pet. He could lock her in the dungeon and make her suffer, for ever turning on him; make her hurt like he hurt. And he could do with her as he pleased, taking her whenever the desire struck. He could tear his way into her every night and leave her dirty and broken every day in retribution. Having her chained to his side, would it be more or less painful than letting her go? Would the sight of her satisfy his desire to have her, or only remind him of its falsity, of her betrayal? His mind was just too clouded right now to think straight. 'What has she done to me?'

Cold, Kagome had never been opposed to the temperature, but now, the freezing bone hanging against her skin had her anxious and uneasy. The trinket had gone deathly still, and lost its heat of life when she confronted Naraku, but she had not had the chance to look inside her shirt and check it without drawing significant attention, specifically from the pervert of the group. They had already trekked far from the forest in some random direction. Naraku's scent had faded by the time they escaped and left them without direction. Finally concocting a plan, she used the excuse of needing to go pee to slip away into the forest and pulled the spider from her shirt. What used to be smooth, detailed surfaces developed a roughness and the swirling red blood had clotted into a mass of black that oozed out of the thin, cracked, bone casing that contained it. In short, it looked nothing like it had, just an old bone that was roughly the shape of a spider. She let out a whimper and sunk down against the trunk of a tree, still cradling the now fragile looking spider in her palms. 'What happened to it; what happened to Naraku to make this part of him look so… broken?' she asked herself.

"Kagome, are you done yet?" Inuyasha hollered, startling the girl with the proximity of his voice and slipped the necklace back into her shirt. It may be powerless, but it was still from him.

"Coming," she called and weaved through the trees back to them, her desperate mind still full of worries and questions that had no answers. Her only answers would come from finding him, but where? Something was wrong, she just knew it, and she had to fix it. There was more than one problem here. She had no idea where Naraku was, and even if they did find him, how would she be able to talk to him? She could run away at night, and leave a note so no one will worry, but that wouldn't work until she found him. With his barrier, she couldn't sense his jewel shards nor could Inuyasha smell him. Maybe he would come for her.

'Why hasn't he come?' Kagome bit at her fingers nervously. 'Relax girl, its only been three days. Sometimes he waited a full week due to preparations. That's all it is, he's probably just setting up some meeting. So calm down already, its nothing to worry over…' She willed her breathing to steady. 'In… Out… In… Out…'

"Hey Inuyasha, is there any water nearby? Our canteens are empty," Miroku asked, trying to get the last drop out of his bamboo water container.

"Yeah, I think there's a lake nearby," his nose rose into the air. "This way." He turned them towards the body of water, much to their relief.

"We should camp nearby for the night," Sango suggested.

"We still have plenty of daylight left, we are not stopping yet," Inuyasha declared with callous authority.

"Right, because it's proven to be so effective thus far, wandering aimlessly and hoping we stumble across Naraku," Sango snapped back. She wasn't only fighting for her sake, but also because Kagome seemed to be lagging behind lately. The maze seemed to take a lot out of her and she was looking kind of worn. An early stop would be beneficial for the girl and she was not going to lose this argument.

"Would you rather we just sit on our hands and let him go around killing whoever he wants?" Inuyasha countered.

"I am saying, we haven't take a rest since that horrible maze and it would be nice to have a few extra hours to recuperate," Sango explained with a nod towards Kagome. Inuyasha turned to look at the girl who didn't even seem to hear them arguing. "We are stopping here, end of discussion." She gripped Hiraikotsu tighter, causing it to thump against her sword hilt and make Inuyasha's ears lay flat at the threat.

"Keh," he conceded.

Kagome plodded along with her friends reflexively, lost in her own mind and oblivious to her surroundings until her foot landed in something cold and wet. Looking down, she found a large lake, spread out expansively in front of her. 'How did I not see something so big?' she wondered and took the time to take in the scenery. It really was a beautiful lake, the sun reflecting off the surface of crystal clear water, pink lilies floating around the edges, and a large rock outcropping that looked like… a turtle? 'Hey wait, I recognize this lake. Naraku flew me over it on the way back from his castle.' She closed her eyes trying to remember the layout from above. 'Let's see, that outcropping was to the left when we flew, and now it is straight ahead, so that means his castle has to be that way.' She looked intensely at the hillside, and although she could not see the castle from here, she knew it was nearby. 'Finally, I have a direction. Even if he is not there, at least I can ask the servants if he's been back lately or where he might be. Its better than sitting around here waiting.' A smile that hadn't graced her face for the past three days appeared, 'I hope you are there, Naraku.'

She did just as planned and at the first opportunity, took off in that direction at her fastest pace. In her desperation to see him, she completely forgot that the others would be able to track her down by scent until she was nearly there. 'I hope they bought my story,' Kagome thought as her legs burned and her lungs ached. She was now at the gates to the castle, and seeing them open and people coming in and out, she just slipped in too. "Excuse me, hello," she called to passing servants. "Can you tell me, is Narak- I mean, the Lord of the castle, here at this time?"

"Lord? You mean that terrifying demon?" a young girl about Kagome's age asked.

"Yes, that's him," Kagome nodded emphatically. "Is he here?"

"He's been here a few days now, that's why the castle is in such chaos. We are trying to make sure everything is to his standards," she explained, adjusting the basket in her arms to her other hip.

'Yes, he's here,' Kagome smiled to herself.

"You look familiar," the girl mentioned. "Have I seen you before? That outfit is not particularly common."

"Well," Kagome blushed, "he did bring me here once before fairly recently, we stayed for a week. You might have seen me then."

The girl gasped and stepped back, "You are the lady our lord lay with? Are you a demon too?"

"No, no," Kagome raised her hands in a placating manner, "I'm human. And I won't hurt you."

"You are human, and yet you laid with that demon?" she asked half curious, half appalled.

"Yeah," Kagome blushed. "He's not as scary as you guys think he is. He did save you from that army after all." The girl just looked at her like she was crazy for not being terrified. "Anyways, thank you for the information. I'm going to go find him." Kagome turned and ran towards the castle building and not long after, she felt his shard and ran straight towards it, down the same corridor she had that night.

Kagome had been playing possible conversations in her head since the incident at the maze, ranging from screaming out in anger for his attempt on her friend's lives to sobbing and doing anything possible to get him to look at her lovingly again. But when she was finally standing before him, nothing came out. He didn't turn to face her, but she could clearly feel his aura buffeting against hers. The hatred, pain, and sorrow were clear for her to sense. "Naraku, I-"

He rose to his feet slowly, leveling his glowing red eyes to lock with hers, she gasped in complete shock. She had never seen him look so intimidating. Even in the times before they "met," she had never seen him look at anyone with such bloodlust. His form towered over her, dwarfing her by a solid foot at least. She knew he was tall, and extremely strong, but those characteristics had never seemed half as pronounced as they did now.

"Why have you come here?" Each word was spoken carefully, perfectly even, for if he wasn't careful, his voice would fracture. Hadn't she done enough; hadn't she made her feelings clear before? Did she take him for a fool that would return to her even though she loved another more! He was in pain, and no amount of regenerating his body would alleviate it.

'She should hurt too,' he didn't even know if that was his feelings or that of the jewel and didn't care. It was true. She hurt him, he would return the favor many times over.

"I had to. I guess I wanted to say I'm sorry-" she started but he would have none of it. He did not want to hear her reason for valuing that imbecile as more than himself.

"Silence! You think I want your apology? You are nothing; you never were," his voice found its comfortable octave, the bitter and loathing quality he used many, many times to twist lies into truth. This, he knew, would be a solid lie, the exact opposite of what he truly felt, but she deserved nothing more.

"Wh-what, do you mean?" she took a step back and her body trembled.

"Did you think I was serious about taking you as a mate? The same foolish woman-child who can't even shoot straight and who shattered the object I covet?" he grasped at the former insecurities that she held, the same ones Inuyasha had made raw and that he, himself, had soothed. It was a scab all to easy to rip off.

"But, you said it was okay, because-" again he interrupted her.

"Because you did not regret?" he finished for her. "Pathetic how you fell so easily for that. You were far easier than I ever expected. Had I known all it took to turn you was to show you a little attention, I would have destroyed you much sooner." She felt the pain and sorrow in the room only increase with each word spoken, unable to tell from where it came.

"Was, it all a lie?" she spoke dismally.

"You finally grasped that? Took you long enough, stupid girl," he watched discontentedly as she did not seem to believe him; not even a single tear fell. No, this would not do, she would experience pain, this same deep pain that can't be healed by simply applying an ointment. He would make sure she broke beyond repair.

"Wait, but you gave me this to protect me," she pulled out her amulet, "that had to have meant something..." Her begging did not go unnoticed and he realized she was closer to breaking than he thought.

With swift strides he had her backed against a wall. A clawed hand reached for her throat and she flinched, but opened when she felt a thin pressure around the back of her neck. She opened her eyes and saw that he had snapped the necklace cord from her and held the dead looking spider in his palm, "This, was only a means to keep track of your pathetic group." He made a demonstration of crushing the bone sculpture in his fist and letting the shards sprinkle to the floor. Kagome collapsed at his feet and began crying, letting the tears spill over unchecked as she finally recognized that she was used. She couldn't stop, and he couldn't tear his eyes from her. "Get out," he told her coldly. "I expect to never see you again, for if I do, I will kill you." She stopped, stunned silent. "Leave!" His voice bellowed at an ear-ringing intensity, and the fear took over forcing her to her feet and fleeing the castle. Servants, hiding from the explosion of dark aura and cowering at his holler watched her as she ran; none dared go near her for fear of their lord's wrath being brought on them. She did not stop, just kept running from the severe roar, until she miraculously made it back to the lake. She collapsed into the shallows, unable to move any further as the tears cascaded into the fresh water below. This was how they found her.

(A/N: Probably the best compliment I could receive would be to be told that you could not help but shed tears. Did I get that result, even a little? All critiques are insanely welcome.

Since several readers seem to be worried about where I am taking this story, I have this to say. Trust me already! Lol. Yes, I will try to make you cry, but that doesn't mean it will be all sad cry. I, personally, cry even harder for happy endings. *HINT HINT* I didn't meticulously set up this whole story/relationship just to tear Kagome and Naraku apart.)
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In a New Light