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Dirty Little Secret	By : MomoDesu Category: InuYasha > Het - Male/Female > Sessh?maru/Kagome > Sessh?maru/Kagome Views: 8795 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own InuYasha, nor make money from this story.

Chapter List
- 7
- 8
- 9
Kagome gave herself one last look over in the mirror before finally deciding that she looked good enough to leave her room. 'I hope I can get to him before someone else does,', Kagome thought. Today she had graduated from high school. She watched him from her place on stage, eyes that were full of pride alternating between herself and Rin. He wasn't much for showing his emotions while in public, but today he wore a grand smile that seemed to light up the entire gymnasium. After the ceremony he managed to pull her to the side and give her a gift that he had gotten specifically for this day; a simple silver and ruby tennis bracelet. He let her go back to her family after a few stolen kisses (and a near quickie in one of the classrooms) so she could go celebrate with them. After all, Rin was having a celebration at her house that evening and she would have the chance to see him then. Her mother pestered her most of the day to take her grandpa's friend Miroku and she finally relented. She only wished she could get to Sesshoumaru before someone else did so she could tell him what happened and why she was on another man's arm. Said man was waiting downstairs for her and she was stalling. She tried calling Sesshoumaru's phone but kept getting the voicemail.
Once more she smoothed out the nonexistent wrinkles in the black dress Sesshoumaru had gotten for her. As an added touch, for some color, she wore the red Dolce and Gabanna shoes they had bought on their first shopping trip to coordinate with the tennis bracelet that he had given her earlier in the day. She thought she looked quite elegant; she only hoped that her lover thought the same.
Kagome had a sinking feeling that tonight was going to be one hell of a night to remember.
-----
The ride to Rin's house wasn't as quiet and awkward as Kagome thought it would be. As it turned out Miroku was quite the conversationalist, when he wasn't asking her to have his children. Of course Kagome knew that it wasn't the children that concerned him the most, it was the act that it took to create said children.
"For someone who just recently graduated you don't look too happy, Kagome," Miroku said while they were at a stoplight about ten minutes away from Sesshoumaru's home.
Kagome just shook her head. "I'm nervous about this entire adulthood thing. I'm no longer just a high school girl; I'm expected to go to college and become a productive member of society," Kagome replied. "I'm worried that I won't live up to the expectations that my family has set up."
Her companion just laughed. "Don't worry, it's not that bad."
"Says the man who bypassed college completely to work on a shrine," she said, almost snotty.
"I'm proud of my heritage of holy people. Just because one doesn't go to college doesn't make them any less of a success."
Kagome sighed. She couldn't tell him the real reason she was antsy and nervous. It might ruin everything if she did tell him. He could go tell her parents and they would think she was lower than dirt for what she was doing. She wasn't their pure little Kagome anymore, she was a girl with a dirty secret that could possibly ruin everything. Everything that she didn't want; she wanted to please her family from one angle yet she wanted to abandon it all and just be happy with Sesshoumaru until the day she died. She wanted to carry the last name Kouinu and have children with him. She wanted to go to sleep every night and wake up next to Sesshoumaru society and her family be damned. She just wanted to be happy.
"Turn left here," she said, directing him onto the road to the party. Her nervousness was becoming more and more apparent to Miroku but he didn't say anything. He attributed it to this new journey in her life that was about to begin. Things were quiet as she directed him to her friend's house. The party inside was already in full swing. She hoped that she could sneak in and get to him unnoticed.
The moment Miroku put the car in park she was out of the car and rushing to the front door but he managed to catch up with her. He took her arm and rang the doorbell. 'Rin, answer the door and not your father. Unfortunately her prayers weren't answered and when the door opened Sesshoumaru stood there gaping at her and her "date", his expressions going through all different emotions from sadness to anger to down right hatred.
"Good evening, Kagome," he said as calmly as possible. "Everyone is in the living room. Food is in the dining room. Please, come in and enjoy yourself."
Kagome could see the burning in his eyes and only hoped that he could see the fact that she was hurting because of it. Miroku led her into the house by the arm but once they were inside she pulled away claiming that she had to go to the bathroom. She followed Sesshoumaru with her eyes through the crowd of people. As quickly as she could, she followed him to his bedroom and walked right in without knocking. "Sesshoumaru?"
"Kagome, don't," he said, no, growled.
"But," she started again.
"No! What do you think you are doing coming here on another man's arm? Have you no consideration for my feelings? Did those whispered declarations of love mean nothing to you?" He continued to rant, his tone growing louder to the point of shouting. "I fucking love you, don't you get that?"
"Sesshoumaru, please," she whispered, tears running down her face.
"I don't want to hear it now. Give me time to cool off." He sat on the bed and hung his head. "Just leave."
"I love you," she said as she turned to the door.
"Just get out!" he yelled at her from his place on the bed.
"I love you," she repeated before leaving the room and shutting the door. Once out of the room she leaned on the door and started to sob; this wasn't how it was supposed to be. She was supposed to have gotten to him first and then tell him that she was forced to bring Miroku and then she was supposed to feed some story to Miroku then sneak off with Sesshoumaru for a quickie. Then she was going to tell him how much he meant to her and they would agree to meet again after the party was over and make love until dawn.
"That's why you were so nervous," said a voice in the dark hallway. Kagome looked up to see Miroku coming toward her.
"Yeah," she said quietly. "How much did you hear?"
"The whole thing. I was trying to catch you and let you know I was going to be in the back yard with a few friends that I had graduated with and I heard every word." He walked over to her and embraced her. "I know we don't know each other very well but I'll be here if you need someone to talk to. I have a feeling you can't really talk about your relationship with anyone else." His kind words caused Kagome to sob even harder into his chest.
"I love him; I love him so much," she cried.
"I know you do, I could tell by the way you looked at each other." He rubbed her back soothingly. "Let's get you home. I'll tell your mother you don't feel very well."
When they arrived at Kagome's house Miroku ushered her to the door and explained what was going on to her mother while she went up to her bedroom. When she got there she took off her shoes and dress, throwing them in the general direction of her clothes hamper not really caring where they landed. She stood there in just her panties looking at the sparkle of the bracelet in the moonlight. Carefully she removed it and lay it on her dresser next to her jewelry box. She bent down and opened one of the dresser drawers and pulled out one of his shirts that she had stolen from him. Sobs never ceasing she pulled on the shirt and walked to her bed. The full moon shined brightly in the sky and it reminded her of his hair. She collapsed onto the bed and curled up into a little ball, sobs shaking her tiny body. It felt like a piece of her soul had been ripped from her body, a large piece of her heart was dying. Everywhere she looked in her room there was a reminder of him. The jewelry on the dresser, the clothes in her closet, his picture sitting on her night table next to the cellphone he gave her, the scent of his laundry detergent lingering from the shirt that she wore. She wished she could go back to his place and curl up in bed with him, let him convince her that when they were together that all was right with the world. She didn't know what to do. The one person who could help her stop crying was the very person that was making her cry, making her feel like an empty shell of a person.
Slowly sleep began to seem like a possible solution as her sobs slowed and her breathing evened out. At least she still had her dreams.
-----
Sesshoumaru paced around the room. Never in his life had he felt this empty and depressed, except when his wife died taking their son with her. It felt like there was a vice grip on his heart, squeezing it relentlessly. The sounds of the party weren't helping any, neither were the reminders of her that filled his room. Her perfume still lingered, making him ache even more.
There was one thing that would make the pain go away for the moment. He left the bedroom, weaving his way through the crowd of newly graduated kids to the kitchen. Opening the freezer he found the last bottle of his favorite vodka sitting there on the shelf looking back at him. He grabbed the bottle and took a swig, not even bothering for a glass.
"What did you do to her?"
Sesshoumaru turned around to face the angry voice. "It isn't any of your business, Kagura. Let things be." He tried to side step her but she stopped his movement.
"None of my business? We may not be very close, but Kagome is still my friend. I already warned you that I would kill you if you hurt her. What did you do?" Her red eyes saw only murder.
He shook his head. "If you are so fucking concerned call Kagome and ask her who that guy she brought was. That may make things clearer for you." He stepped around her successfully this time and went back to his bedroom. Once in the room he turned off the lights and let the bright light of the full moon guide him. Taking another deep pull from the bottle he opened the drawer of his night table and pulled out a pack of cigarettes and a small ash tray. He hadn't smoked in a long time, but tonight he didn't care. She was gone. The only other thing in his life that had meaning. Rin and Kagome, his girls, his daughter and his love, the reasons he continued to function day after day.
Half of the bottle was gone and he was beginning to feel the alcohol pumping through his system; things were a little fuzzy and the pain of being alone was starting to fade. For the first time since his wife died he began to cry. She was gone and she took his heart and soul with her. She was the only thing he needed, the only thing that he wanted.
The hurt inside was almost unbearable. His actions were childish, he should have at least heard her out. There had to have been a good reason for her to bring that other guy to the party, there had to be a good reason for the look of pain that crossed her face when he opened the door.
He lay back and closed his eyes. He needed her with him at his side.
- 7
- 8
- 9
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Dirty Little Secret