Adult-FanFiction.org : Inuyasha / Yashahime

M.I.A	By : Maddiesan Category: InuYasha > Het - Male/Female > Kouga/Kagome Views: 4873 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 2
Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha, nor the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 7
- 8
- 9
A/N: La, la, la, la.
M.I.A
Chapter 8: Many Rivers to Cross
She was stressed.
She had nightmares. Haru had nightmares. The shrine was falling apart and they did not have enough money to fix the rough. She had an exam coming up and she could not study for it because she took extra shifts at work to pay for the shrine. And worst of all, she absolutely could not drown any of those problems with alcohol. She worked too much and she felt like showing up to work after a few drinks was not ideal - at least not if she intended on keeping her job, which she did. Instead, she had to let her frustrations out some other ways. Unfortunately for her, the situation was not ideal but she would make the most of it.
"Oh, fuck."
There was nothing but the sound of her ass slamming against his thighs echoing through the room. He was gripping at her like she was going to slip away and he was groaning way too loudly considering where they were.
But his cock was getting the job done.
She never tried to mix pleasure and work. It was messy and it always led to a bunch of problem. But when she came in to work this morning, she was stressed out. She had too much to do and not enough time for herself. On top of it all, it rested on her to fix everything and she needed an escape. A nice delivery boy came - she had seen him once or twice. It was responsible for mail - at least she thought he was - and then… well, he was young, he was cute. And he had winked at her before. It was - the one solution she had found to release all of her stress; sex. She had asked him if he could help her with something - how cliché - and he had followed her to the back room.
It had not taken much to convince him to fuck her.
And now there she was, bent over a desk while he was pounding inside of her.
It was not like when Kouga fucked her. It was not raw, it was not full of pain and full of release but if she focused hard enough, she could forget where she was. She closed her eyes, trying to feel nothing but his cock slipping in and out of her, numbing her to everything else in her life. Her shit life. And it worked. Until she felt him tremble and then she knew he had unleashed himself in the condom that separated them. She never took a chance again and she never fucked without a condom. She kept a whole bunch of them on her - never again. He had told her it was safe and then apparently he had forgotten to check again. She did not regret her son but she was not about to have another kid.
He collapsed on her back for a second and she resisted the urge to annoyingly sigh. She was not a pillow and it was not like they were in the perfect place to take a break. She was already jeopardizing her job fucking him here. Could he not hurry? His chest was sticky against her back as he finally released her ass from his grip. He finally pulled himself out of her dripping cunt. There he was, all proud but she had not even come. She pulled her shirt down along with her skirt while he removed the condom from his flaccid penis. She retrieve her underwear from under her ankles and put them back in place.
He had his pants puddled at his feet along with underwear that had the words top dog written everywhere in white. Great. He was truly young.
"I- Hm, so can I call you?" he finally mustered up the courage to say.
He had seen her more than once and he had dreamed about that ass but he never thought he would ever get to go out with her — much less fuck her. When she had gripped his cock with her hands, asking to be fucked, he thought it was a dream come true. She had been watching him like he had been watching her. Now that this first step was out of the way he would not mind fucking her again. They did not even have to date. He would be fine just watching that ass all day long.
"I don't think so," she said as she smoothened her skirt back into an acceptable state.
"What?"
"It was a one time thing, nothing else."
She fixed her hair rapidly - she knew she had to get out of here fast or he would start pushing the issue or asking more questions and she did not need him to do either of those things. She thought men loved it when it was a one time thing and they did not have to worry about anything else. Why did they all keep on disappointing her? Why couldn't sex just be sex? Why did it have to be anything more? Although, she had to say, this was not quite sex. It was mostly - she did not even know. No orgasm… and now he was being annoying. In the end, she might have done this for nothing; she was about just as stressed as she had been before he fucked her.
A waste of an opportunity.
But this was the only risk she could afford to take today. She might have to take a tiny shot of alcohol once she would be back home. Unless her mother was present - then it was better not. She had drank enough this week and she did not need her mother's judgy eyes on her on top of it all. Plus, Haru had a - thing - she forgot - was it the boy's scouts? She did not even remember.
On top of being stressed, she was a horrible mother.
It was too hard to be everything at once - but he was the one reason she was holding together, trying her best to be everything.
He was her light.
-M-
He should not be here.
He did not know anything about here anymore.
One day he had left and he had promised himself that he would never return. The worst of it was that it took him forever to get back there. He lived as off the grid as he could and that made traveling a near impossible task. Well, when it was across oceans. Fortunately for him, he knew other low key people and after a while, he had managed to make it back to where his home used to be; Japan. He had promised himself that he would never set foot here again but - but there were whispers and he had heard something. It was too tempting for him to not check it out. He had resisted the urge for a long time but now, the time had run out.
Apparently, Ginta - who was supposed to be dead and bury, something he had seen with his own eyes - was having a funeral today. Of course, that was no longer his name in the real human world but it did not matter. It got to him that he was not dead. But he saw him die. There was no way he should have survived and somehow, he had? Ginta was related to a lot of memories he would rather forget but if he had been alive, if he had - a family? Heirs? He owed him to pay his respects at the very least.
He was a pack creature by nature. One that had been very alone for a very long time. He had drank a lot, convincing himself that coming served no purpose. Even if his brother had survived everything, he was now dead. What was the point of putting himself in harm's way? What was the point of coming to see a dead man? It took him a long time to move his ass off the couch but he eventually did. Now that the scents of Japan were drifting up his nose he was truly regretting it. He should have stayed where he was. He did not belong anywhere. Here there were people, and there were - he could not be what he was; a monster.
Heck, he was unable to bring his own alcohol and now he would have to splurge on some. Like he had that kind of money laying around.
That and the fucking hotel.
As if he wanted to pay a fucking hotel.
As if he wanted his name anywhere.
As if he wanted to be in Tokyo.
Frustration rose through him as he walked down the streets, a green bag hurled over his shoulder. His bangs were sweaty, glueing to his forehead. Anything set him off now. Anything. He had expected it; he had made her leave. He had fucked a bunch of women since she left; and every time he came she was in his head. He did not even love her. All they were doing was fucking and somehow she was in his fucking head all the time. There was a need and aching but he ignored it all the time. She was also a reason why he had not wanted to come to Ginta's funeral. He vaguely recalled her saying home was somewhere in Tokyo. In a shrine.
Now, he had no idea if she had returned home or not. Or what the fuck she had done with her life. And Tokyo was a big city but - he did not want to be near her. What if the pull was too much? What if the bond tugged at him even more than it already had during the past few years? He remembered the first week she left; he howled at the moon for seven days straight. Eventually he had to get a grip on himself before he gave his identity away. But it had been difficult. The primal part of him wanted her - he had marked her after all. That one unbreakable bond. One he thought he would have with her five hundred years ago.
Now he was no longer kidding himself.
They were not a match - not a good one anyway.
And he could not love anyone. He could not love anything.
All he could do was destroy everything he touched. He had done the best thing for her when he had sent her away. If she had stayed by his side her life would have spiralled out of control like this and there would have been no coming back for her. Nobody would know what the mark was and she would live a normal life, with a normal human husband and probably go on to have normal human kids. Her life could get better and he was kind enough to have given her that chance. Whatever inch of kindess and softness had been left inside of him, he had used it to send her away and now there was none left.
He had been a dick the past few years.
He had fucked girls in alleys, leaving before they could even pull their panties up.
He had drank more than he should have and he was surprised even his youkai body was not giving up on him. Some nights, when it was too hard, he would try some drugs but they were harder to obtain since he lived so secluded from society - something he enjoyed.
Each time he found new tricks.
And none of them worked. They only helped to amplify the darkness growing inside of him. All he could do was hope that it would slowly consume him until there was nothing left. Yes, that could be the thing that would cost him his life. Finally, his suffering would be over. Because he was too much of a coward to end it all himself. He had tried but - he could never completely finish it. All he could do was have more pain, more scars and more suffering.
One day he might succeed.
The streets surrounding him were quiet and mostly dark. There were a few lamps lighting up the way, but they were not bright enough for anybody to see his face. It was not as though he thought someone would recognize him but he preferred lurking in the shadows. It was easy to tell that the cold nights were coming because it was not even late and yet, darkness had swallowed everything. He kicked his feet with each step he took, focusing on simply making it to the hotel. Once he got there he would be able to get smash and then everything would be well.
He was about to cross the street when suddenly he was stopped by the sound of an object bouncing in his direction. Immediately his ears flared up and he turned his head to the left. He watched as a bright green ball stumbled down the stairs and rolled all the way to his feet. It only stopped when it hit the side of his brown shoes and he arched an eyebrow. His puzzlement did not last long since a few seconds later a little kid followed the same path as the ball. Tears were puddling in his eyes as he rushed down the stairs as rapidly as his chubby little legs would let him. His arms were waving in front of him, as though that would help him get the ball any faster.
The boy seemed so preoccupied by his ball that he never even seemed to notice Kouga. At least not until he picked up the ball from the ground, relief lighting up his face as though all the world problems had been solved. Kids. They were stupidly ignorant about everything. This one especially; who the fuck ran down the stairs like that?
"Thank you."
Kouga blinked once. Did he just thank him? For walking in front of his ball?
"Shouldn't take to strangers kid," was the only warning he intended on giving him. He was lucky he was not a psycho killer or a child kidnapper. That kid was way too trusting.
The kids's blue eyes light up with a fire before he pouted. "I don't." He hugged his ball closer to his chest, his brown bangs now almost covering his eyes.
Whatever he did not have time for this crap.
"HARU!"
The shrieking voice nearly sent all of his instincts in alert but he managed to hold himself back before he took a defensive stance. His heart was beating rapidly as he watched an older woman tumble down the stairs, panic flashing through her brown eyes. Her long black skirt was flowing around her as she took the steps two by two, attempting to reach the ground faster. Once she spotted the little boy, he saw her smile. She took the last stair and then, kneeled in front of the boy.
"What did grandma tell you about going in the street?" she said before wrapping her arms around him. He had scared her half to death.
"Mommy said no."
"And grandma said no too," she said as she pulled away. She gently tapped the tip of his nose with her index finger before letting out a sigh. That boy had too much energy and was way too fast for his own good. It was getting more and more difficult to actually keep up with him. It was in times like these that she could tell he had youkai blood. Soon enough, Kagome might be the only one who could keep up with him - and even then. Although, truth be told, she did not know much about Haru's father. Kagome had kept quiet about it and Miyu had not pushed the issue.
When she would be ready to talk, she would. Until then, she would wait and be as supportive as she had been during the last few years.
"I'm really sorry about this, sir," she said, finally acknowledging Kouga's presence.
This is why he did not like the city. This is why he was already missing the piece and quiet he had deep in the forest. He had been here less than an hour and he was already forced to have too many interactions with too many he did not care about. He forced himself to give her a tight lip smile and then, he waved her off. If he spoke, it might encourage her and then this conversation might be never ending. He was not somewhere where he could easily hide which meant he had to be civil at the very least or he might get himself in more trouble than he wanted. He tensed up, squaring up his shoulders - it was time to leave before it got even more out of hands.
Suddenly, all thoughts were interrupted when the clacking of high heels echoed through the vicinity. He was forced to raise his head to see just what the fuck was making that noise. And then he stopped breathing.
There, running, was her.
Her long dark locks were wrapped into a bun, her body covered by a green blouse and skirt. She was running, her heels clacking, her cheeks red and a tiny layer of sweat building up around her forehead. She did not see him but he saw her.
"I'm so sorry," she said breathlessly as she quickly stopped in front of them. "I missed the bus - and then my boss - and then," She stopped talking to put her hands on her thighs, trying to catch her breath.
This was not happening because this could not possibly be true. She could not be here. He could not have been here in this short amount of time and see her. Because life hated him but he did not know it could be this cold and this cruel. He was supposed to be able to catch a breather, he was supposed to be able to pause for a moment. This was not pausing, this was - this was death. This was his punishment for - for everything he had done. He knew he was supposed to make a dash for it while she had wait to realize who was in front of her but he could not. He was locked in place, his eyes staring at the mark on her neck.
He had not chased her away to find himself in this situation.
He had not broken all rules and came here to find her.
This was all wrong.
He had to flee.
"Mama! Haru found the ball!"
Mama?
Did that kid call her mama?
For a moment, the whole world spun. She had done exactly what he thought she was going to do; she healed and she moved on. Although his eyes were locked on her for a good moment now - even if he should be running away from her - his nose finally began to work. She reeked of another man - and of sex. He could tell because he had marked her and his scent was supposed to always be on her. It was currently being masked by someone's else odor. And that was okay because - she had a little boy with someone else. And this was exactly what he had been hoping for. He thought if he saw she had the life he thought she would, it would be easier.
But it was not.
Because his instincts were not happy with him. He had let her go to someone else. He had let someone else lay a claim on what he had marked. She reeked of someone else's cock and odor and it was like she was tainted.
He had fucked a bunch of women. He did not care.
But deep inside, a part of him did and he wanted to crush that part. She was not his, she never was. The only thing she had ever been was a giant mistake he wished he had never made. Nothing else, nothing more. He wanted no part of this.
"The man helped!"
"The man?" she asked with a smile as she ruffled her fingers through his hair. She titled her head upwards and then - and then she died. Something inside of her died while she looked into a pair of blue eyes she thought she would never see again. The world stopped moving, her heart stopped beating and her guts twisted enough for her to want to puke on the spot.
She could not move, she could not look away. A terror had taken hold of her body and she began to tremble as though she feared for her life. She wanted to take her son and run and she wanted to beat the crap out of him. She was what she was because of him. He lured her into a false security, he lured her into trusting him and then he took everything she was and he gave nothing back. He made her life a mess and now - now… if it were not for the words her son had spoken, she would think she had gone crazy, she would think she was hallucinating.
But Kouga stood in front of her.
And she knew in that moment and despite everything she wanted, everything she needed, she had one task; she had to protect her son from him.
No words left her lips but she did manage to tear her eyes from him. She felt the vomit rising up her throat, the contractions of her intestines and her stomach as they wanted to expel everything she had eaten that day. She held it back. She was not Kagome. She was Haru's mother. And her priority was him and she had to focus on him.
And for fuck's sake she needed to get away.
She did the only thing that came to her; she wrapped her arms around her son, picked him up from the ground and she run up the stairs like her life depended on it.
And it did.
-M-
It was not real.
He was not real.
Kagome's back was pressed to the door while she sat there in the darkness. Her head was leaned back, casually banging against the wooden door. There was a bottle of vodka in her hand but she had yet to open it. She had meant to actually finish the whole thing but her stomach did not agree with her. As soon as she had gotten her son to safety she had puked her guts out until there was nothing left for her to puke except a yellow acidic liquid - and then she had puked some more. Her stomach burned, her throat was raspy and though the vodka might ease away all the pain in her head, it might make her physical pain worse.
Tears had spilled out of her eyes had some point but she could not recall when.
He was not supposed to be here.
He was supposed to be oceans away and her and her son were supposed to be safe.
Her mother had looked at her strangely, her mother - and her son - had asked questions but she had answered none of them. Instead, she had locked herself away and she had not emerged since then. What the fuck was she supposed to say? She was never to be in this situation and she had not prepared for it.
It had taken a few hours for her to even breathe normally. At some point she thought hyperventilation was going to take her and relieve her from her sweet misery but she calmed down. Because - because he was here but he knew nothing. There was absolutely no way for him to tell that Haru was his. Haru could be anywhere between 3-5. Kouga probably did not get a good look at him. Although why was he in front of the shrine? No, no he could not tell. He did not know. But he was supposed to be a loner in the middle of the woods, in another country. So why had he come to her shrine? But he had no followed her up and -
Oh god all these back and forth were going to kill her. They were going to take her sanity away.
All she could do was - wait?
It had to be something other than her - other than Haru. Kouga would not move from where he was, Kouga would not venture into the world like that - not for her and not for a kid. He did not want kids, and he did not want her. It was not about her son. She had to think rationally about this. He would rather be free of this responsibility than to have it. It was a twisted moment of fate, one made to ensure that her life was complete hell, but it had to be random. And yet, her heart refused to stop pounding in her chest. She would never be able to sleep again, she would never be able to stop looking over her shoulder.
Most of all, what if he was still there?
What if he waited for her right now?
What if he had never left?
It was not as though she had inspected the area. As soon as she had gotten her son to safety, she had puked - grabbed the alcohol - and now she was in the dark. Maybe she had to check. Maybe she needed to re-grasp her sanity. She could not feel him in the vicinity but then again, she had never been quite good at that. But she had felt him that one time at his house. Ugh, this was so complicated.
She did not know why, but she knew she needed to go outside and check.
It might be the only thing that could give her some kind of peace of mind. Her hands trembled as she put down the bottle of vodka. She meant to put it down quietly but her body had other ideas in mind as it loudly crashed upon the floor. It did not matter. All that mattered was that she had to find her self control before she passed the front door. She quietly opened the door of her bedroom, another wave of nausea hitting her. She made it down the stairs only to notice it was completely dark; her mother had put Haru to bed and she herself had gone to sleep. It was probably best that way. If they had been awake, there would have been way too many questions for her and she could not possibly handle that right now.
Her steps were quiet and slow but she finally made it downstairs. Once she reached the last step, she tried to peek outside but saw nothing. But he could still be by the stairs.
She managed to drag her trembling body all the way to the first steps of the shrine. All she found was the wind and the emptiness in the world. She wanted to be relieved, she wanted to let some happiness wash over her but she could not.
There was something in the back of her mind that was telling her that she should not feel at ease, that she should be on her guard but she could not explain why she felt that way.
"So you're a mom now huh."
That was the reason.
She stiffened and she did not dare to turn around; it was better if she was not looking at him. Looking at him would allow him to see the truth in her eyes and she could not let that happen. "Mm-hmm."
Words were bad too.
He did not know why he had waited. He should have gone to his hotel, he should have gotten completely smashed until he forgot he even saw her. And yet somehow, he ended up lurking in the shadows until she appeared. Because he knew she would come to him. For the same reason he had stayed, she had come. He had mistakenly bounded them and now they were too close to each other. He had made her run away twice… could he do it again? Actually, could he walk away now that his instincts were challenge? They were harder to fight. He had buried them for so long that he no longer knew what his control on them was.
"You've been fucked recently."
She hated his fucking nose.
But, that one little mistake did give her an alibi.
"Can't make a kid by myself."
But he did not smell a man. There was no man in the house - just her and her mother. Why was there only her and her mother? He could feel his eyes darkening but it did not make him walk away from her. It made him get closer. As though he was going to touch her but he never would - never again. It was not his place to ask her questions but he was.
"What the fuck do you want Kouga?" she finally spat out. The silence was killing her - his presence was killing her. "What are you doing here?"
"Ginta died."
"Oh."
It was not about her - relief washed over her like a warm blanket on a cold night. He was not here about her - he was not here about her son. He could not get involve in her life, he could not take away what was hers. She could walk away from him and she could know that she was free. "Sorry to hear." She might hate Kouga with a passion but Ginta had never been anything but nice to her. "Now get the fuck off my property." He had insulted her when he had made her leave. The years had not helped her forget the words he had spoken to her. "You and I - we have nothing to do with each other. I left you be - leave me be."
He wanted it to be that simple.
He did not want to be thinking about shoving his cock in her dripping cunt. He did not want to think what it would be like to bend her over the stairs, her hands tied behind her back. He did not want to think about fucking her but he was. Already his cock was waking up and he knew it was bad. It was not him - as with everything else in his life, he was not in control. There was nothing he could do to fix this. Even being here was making it all worse - he had to walk away from her. He confirmed that she had her new life, he confirmed that she had moved on like she was supposed to and yet - there was something off about her.
Was the smell of puke? Maybe she was pregnant again.
Was it the dark circles under her eyes? Mothers rarely slept.
What was it?
He could not pinpoint it.
"I don't wanna see you here again," she warned as she finally gathered the courage to turn around.
She met his eyes and she knew she had to look as serious as possible. She could not let him know what he had done to her, she could not let him know what he had given her. If he knew, he would ruin it, he would rot it like he had done to everything else. Like he had done to her.
"Or I will use my powers on you." Her nostrils flared. "And this time you won't enjoy it."
She would defend her son even if it cost her everything she had. He was her humanity, he was her light and he was the one good thing left about her. When she held him, she could feel, when she held him, she could be human again. She was herself when he was around.
Kouga could not touch him.
As she walked by him, there was a zap, a warning shot, but he did not back away.
Instead, he watched her walk away while the nagging feeling in his chest refused to go away.
Something was off, something was wrong - but he could not tell what it was.
He should leave.
She was right.
But somehow, he was reluctant to walk away. Something had called him here and something was keeping him here.
He had to figure out what it was - even if it brought more torture.
Maybe she would be true to her words, maybe she would use her powers against him.
Then he would be free.
-M-
- 7
- 8
- 9
You need to be logged in to leave a review for this story.You need to be logged in to leave a review for this story.
Report Story

M.I.A