In too deep | By : Pallas Category: InuYasha > General Views: 3688 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0 |
Disclaimer: I do not own InuYasha, nor make money from this story. |
A/N: This is my first Inuyasha fic. I do
not think it’s something special at all, but I merely wrote it to get it out of
my thoughts. Seeing that there are very many ways of spelling the names, I’ve
decided on the ones I liked most. And a thing about Sesshoumaru’s severed arm.
Which one? This question is solved now, thanks to RyokoYuy!! Thank you so much
for explaining the page-turning-thing! I wouldn’t have guessed!!
In too deep
Chapter I: Underestimated
As the bloodred sun sank down under the horizon,
the wind picked up speed, blowing the fallen leaves up and around. The twilight
gave the forest a golden hue, making the autumn colours of the trees even more
beautiful. Winter was approaching fast.
Kagome lent back against a
large tree, and just took the scene in. It soothed her worn-out emotions
somewhat, making her forget her problems temporarily. The forest always had
given her some peace; even as a child, she loved playing in a forest. So many
things to discover, so many plants and animals to see. Even now, she often
stopped, to admire a very old tree, or to point Shippo at some rare flowers.
Her mother had done to the same things with her, thus making her aware of the
beauty of nature.
She shivered, and pulled her
jacket closer around her. It was actually too thin, and gave her almost no
extra warmth. And her uniform underneath it was no better. She should go back
home, and get some clothes more fitting to the changing seasons, but she was
afraid that she, once home, couldn’t bring up the courage and determination to
come back and to expose herself to the problems of her life in the Sengoku
Jidai
Of course, racing a
homicidal, insane and sadistic hanyou for the last remaining shards was
exhausting, and at times very dangerous and unrewarding, but that was not the
reason why she was currently at the end of her rope. No, that was the blame of
another hanyou.
Inuyasha... She sighed
deeply, while she absent-mindedly played with the hem of her skirt. She stared
down at it, but saw nothing. Instead, many memories were played out in front of
her eyes, making her relive them, time after time.
It brought her back to times,
when Inuyasha had lied to her, by going after Kikyo, and not telling her. That
was what hurted the most; his obvious carelessness to inform her about major
decisions in his life; decisions which effected her as well! His painful
dismissal of her feelings, the contempt towards her loyality and friendship she
offerd him. Even love... She had learned quickly to harnass her heart against
his stinging and cruel remarks and insults. Her crush had already faded, and
her love was wasting away, out of neglect and due to too many humiliations. But
the most painful thing of all was the continuing rejection of her friendship
and loyality. Like he was almost afraid to get close to her, like it was a
betrayal to his old love- now revived. He had to be a masochist; Kikyo hated
him, and tried to hurt him at every opportunity, and yet, he kept meeting her,
loving her. And when he looked at her, Kagome, he saw something that resembled
his loved one, but came short in many, many ways,... if you’d believe him.
She always had her up and
ns ins in her relationship with Inuyasha, but the past few months, it had only
deteriorated... She had tried everything she could come up with, to strenghten
their shaky friendship, but he wouldn’t cooperate. It only seemed to annoy him.
She had become fru frustrated, and had begon to doubt herself even more than
before. What was wrong with her, that she couldn’t even keep a friendship with
the man she loved?
But maybe things weren’t her
fault. Maybe, she had done the best she could, and now should better forget
him? Find somebody else, someone who would give a damn about her feelings? She
had been told several times, that she wasn’t unworthy of the hanyou, no it was
the other way around! She smiled ruefully; she didn’t care; she wanted no-one
else... Right? It seemed that some people claimed otherwise...
One person in particulair; he
seemed to know her so well; he saw through her defenses and masks. She was as
an open book to him. However the greatest mystery he had ever encountered. She
buried herself into her jacket, like she was hiding from painful memories. He
scared her, in more ways than one. She was weak to admit it, but only to
herself! For him, she stood proud, never to back down. Never to avoid his
piercing gaze. Unwillingly, her thought were yet again centered around him. He
was a... problem, yes. He doubled her anxiety, her worries, and her fatigue.
She didn’t know how much longer she could take the stress. Maybe she should go
home...
Her memories drifted back to
the day when her life got a whole lot more complicated...
****
It was just three weeks ago, on
a beautiful day in early autumn. They were on their way back to Kaede’s
village, after having successfully found and retrieved a Shikon shard. The
battle had been a hard one, injuring Inuyasha quite badly, and bringing minor
injuries to the rest of the group. Kagome hoped that once they’d arrive in the
village, Inuyasha would allow them some time to rest and heal, even if it was
only for his own wounds. Still, they had been quite happy, and even Inuyasha
let up on his constant grumbling.
The peace was not meant to
be; suddenly, Inuyasha sniffed the air curiously. Demon, was the first thing
that came to Kagome’s mind and she was soon proved right when Inuyasha growled
and drew the Tetsusaiga. Everyone was immediatley on edge, but before anyone
had the time to ask what was wrong, Inuyasha sprang into action; he swong the
sword at a couple of trees.
It was blocked.
Swords were pulsing with
power, but behind the owner stood; the stoic and cold presence of the Great
Demon Lord of the West, Sesshoumaru. As Inuyasha was straining with his blade
against the Toukijin, the taiyoukai was having no troubles at all at keeping
Inuyasha at bay; he almost looked bored. Then, with a casual fleck of his
wrist, Sesshoumaru threw Inuyasha backwards.
All the while, Kagome, Sango
and Miroku stood at the side, all bracing their weapons. Shippou had hid
him
himself half behind Kagome, snarling at the Demon Lord. Kagome frowned;
Sesshoumaru seemed even more confident than usual. And strong, very strong.
They hadn’t heard nor seen him in a couple of months. Kagome wondered where he
had been up to. She shuddered; he always succeeded in frightening her, just
with his presence alone. The memories of all their previous encounters were
still fresh on her mind. Still, she refused to give into that fear. She notched
an arrow on her bow, and watched nervously.
Inuyasha jumped to his feet,
ready fhe fhe fight. He growled at his brother: “What do you want now? Doesn’t
it get through that thick skull of yours that you just can’t get Tetsusaiga?!
You can’t even touch it,” taunted Inuyasha. “Or maybe you just want to have
your ass kicked again? By the way, how’s the left arm?”
Sesshoumaru didn’t react to
Inuyasha’s baiting, which wasn’t unexpected, but instead, he smiled a very cold
and cruel smile.
“Now that you ask, hanyou,
it’s quite fine, thank you.”
Kagome frowned; what did he
mean by that?
“Ha! Got yourself another
replacement? We’ll see what you’ve come up with this time!” Inuyasha was full
of confidence.
“Replacement? No.” Still that
cold, satisfied smile adorned his lips, giving Kagome shivers. What was he up
to?
Suddenly, the left sleeve of
Sesshoumaru’s kimono, which appeared to be empty, was lifted, and a hand
appeared. Long, gracious fingers with the feared claws, and the magenta stripes
adorned the wrist.
Oh... Oh no. This is not
good! Kagome gasped and the feeling of independing disaster deep in her stomach
grew stronger.
“What!” Exclaimed Miroku.
“How?!”
“He got his arm back!”
Sango’s voice sounded intimidated.
“Maybe he ‘borrowed’ another
one?!” Miroku suggested.
“No, it’s his own! Look at
the claws, and the stripes! They’re identical to the ones on his other wrist!
This arm is definitly his own...” Kagome bit her lip.
“How is this possible? Can he
regenerate lost bodyparts? Or is this the cause of magic?” Sango wondered
aloud.
Inuyashared red at his
brother, dumbfounded. “How?” Was the only thing that came out of him.
“Wouldn’t you like to know?”
Sesshoumaru gave him a mocking smirk, and proudly twisted his left wrist, as
like testing it’s flexibility.
Inuyasha seemed to recompose
himself, and lowered himself in a fighting stance. “New arm or not, if you
think you can take the sword from me, you’re delirious.”
“We’ll see about that, won’t
we?” And suddenly he was gone; he moved to fast for human eyes to see. The next
thing Kagome saw was Inuyasha desperately blocking the Toukijin’s swings
directed at him.
Seeing Sesshoumaru fight was
like watching a very graceful, powerful and most of all deadly dance. A dance
which seemed to cost him no effort at all. Kagome had to admit that in some
strange way, it thrilled her; she knew that if it hadn’t been aimed to kill
them , she could have enjoyed watching him with awe and respect. Now, she was
franticly trying to figure out a way to stop him from killing Inuyasha. Because
this time, he was more serious than ever in achieving his goal.
After they had survived this
attack, she would deal with this strange feeling she got from looking at the
fighting Youkai. Inuyasha would not be pleased if he found out that somehow his
precious sharddetector was having feelings like a grudging respect and
admiration for his hated half-brother.
However, as she watched on,
the surviving part could turn out to be very difficult; she could clearly tell
that Inuyasha was using all his strenght and speed to avoid the Demon Lord’s
attacks, while Sesshoumaru only seemed to be warming up. He’s playing with him,
came the sudden realisation. She could tell, by the coldly amused smirk and the
cruel look in his eyes.
Kagome saw the frustrated and
angered look on the face of Inuyasha. Inuyasha wounds were clearly bothering
him, but still, not at much as Kagome had feared. Luckily, he healed fast.
However, she knew what this did to Inuyasha; it was making him feel even more
insecure about his own strenghts. Only Sesshoumaru succeeded in making him
doubt his own capabilities. It made Inuyasha even more determined in completing
the Shikon no Tama, and make his wish to become a full demon. Everything, to
become worthy in his brother’s eyes. It would be of no use, Kagome thought
miserably; Sesshoumaru would never look at Inuyasha with anything else but
hatred and disgust. She knew that
Inuyasha didn’t recognise his own desire to be considered as an equal in
his brother’s eyes. Instead, it manifested itself as a need for revenge.
There was no time to be
contemplating Inuyasha’s traumas from his youth, nor his brother’s part in
them. Inuyasha only just avoided a killing blow to the chest. Worry and fatigue
was etched on his face, but still he fought on, not wanting to admit a defeat.
Because admitting defeat here, would mean his death. Suddenly, Sesshoumaru
struck with his left hand, poison glistening on his claws, sinking deep in
Inuyasha’s right shoulder. Inuyasha staggerd from the blow, and fell to his
knees. He was panting as he clutched his wounded shoulder with one hand. The
other brought the Tetsusaiga up, and just in time; the Toukijin was stopped
from his deadly descent towards Inuyasha’s head. But he was visibly strugling
to keep it up, and soon, his last bit of strenght would leave him too.
I’ve got to help him! Was Kagome’s
last rational thought before she let loose her arrow, which was glowing with
her mysterious powers. Powers, of which she was still unsure how to use them;
they came from somewher deep inside her, but she lacked total control over him.
The arrow hit true; it
shattered the taiyoukai’s armor. Well, I sure cost him some armor! Was her
completely irrational thought. But at the same time, she had fired two more
arrows. One missed, another clashed with the Toukijin, making showers of energy
erupting from the evil sword. Sesshoumaru ducked from another arrow, but was
shocked when one nicked his shoulder, leaving a shallow wound, which was
however hurting like hell. Miko powers.
She had succeeded from
diverting Sesshoumaru’s attention from Inuyasha, only to have it directed at
her instead. She didn’t hesitate, nor faulter under his heavy stare, but kept
shooting her arrows. Where her speed, or her accuracy came from, she did not
know, but it enabled her to keep the Lord occupied.
He narrowed his eyes at her,
and she felt cold dread tingle up her spine. She heard the shouts of her
friends, but they were vague, muffled. She was solely concentrating on her bow
and arrows, filling them with her power.
All of a sudden, one pierced
his right hand. Both shocked, Kagome and Sesshoumaru looked at the arrow,
pulsating with her purifying energy. With a fierce growl, he wrenched it
through his hand, and dropped it to the ground. When he looked up again, at the
little Miko, he saw her aiming one right at his heart. Usually, he would have
laughed at her, and dared to shoot it, knowing he could easily snatch it from
the air. However, how did one actually pierce his hand? How could they be this
fast? He felt her power wreck through his blood, making him even more wary of her
powers. Where did those come from? How did she got them? Last time he saw her,
she was not even close to possesing something like this...
Would he take his chances and
still charge at her? Maybe it was wiser to first completely understand the
source and nature of the little creature’s power. Then, he would attack.
“This, little Miko, is not
over.”
And with that said, he was
gone.
****
Kagome leaned her head back
against the rough bark and stared at the cloudless sky, which was quickly darkening.
Venus was starting to appear, signaling the beginning of the night. Everything
around her seemed so peaceful, almost mocking the turmoil of her mind and
heart.
She still didn’t know why or
how her power had manifested itself so strongly that day. And even though she
felt quite happy about her accomplishment, it had been the cause of her
problems. However, she felt more valuable to the group now; she had a way to
defend herself,n fin fi No No longer was she a bystander, a weakness that had
to be protected. Inuyasha had told her many times before how useless she was, a
liability and a nuisance when they fought; he had made her feel very guilty and
very insecure about herself. Kagome frowned. He did still; he only had to make
a off-handed remark about Kikyou, and her self-esteem was gone. It was true;
she didn’t have a perfect control over them, and Inuyasha sure rubbed that in.
The burning question in her mind since a long time was: did he know how much it
hurt her, or was it just his mood that made him say those things, and asn’asn’t
even aware of their venom?
She closed her eyes; she was
so very tired of it all. She now wished that day had never come to pass. It
caused another major fight to happen between her and Inuyasha. There had been
some pretty harsh things said, and even now she couls still feel the disbelief,
the hurt and the outrage at his words. All this because she dared to interfere
in a fight which, he said, he could have easily won...
****
Kagome fell to the ground, gasping for
breath, and all the while thanking the fates for bringing her this much good
luck. She looked at her hands in disbelief and awe; they were still glowing.
How had she managed to do this?
Miroku sat down beside her, a
very relieved look on his face. “Kagome... That was... unbelievable. I am
impressed.” Admiration shone in his eyes, making Kagome blush.
“Ehh, well, I don’t know how
I did it... Or if I can do this again...”
“Don’t worry,” Sango said
happily, “I think things will be a lot easier from now on.”
“You were really... cool!”
Shippou exclaimed, having remembered that word from her. “And you really kicked
his butt!”
“Language, Shippou,” Kagome
said sternly, but grinned at the energetic little fox.
“But... Inuyasha says much
worse things!”
“Oh. You want to sound like
Inuyasha, then?” Kagome asked innocently.
“No!” He said disgusted.
Kagome laughed; at his antics, at the relief that she felt and at the tingling
feeling of her awoken power. Laughing just seemed the way to let it out.
It was soon over when she
looked up an saw a wounded, but irate hanyou standing before her.
She jumped up. “Sorry! I
forgot- Are you all right? He didn’t hurt you really bad? Did he? Come on, sit
down and-“
“Shut up!” He yelled, and
snarled at her.
Kagome took a step back,
confused and shocked. What was wrong?
“What’s wrong?” She voiced
her confusion.
“You stupid whench! Always so
eager to get into the middle of a fight, aren’t you?” He threw those words at her,
making her even more confused.
“Always thinking you can get
away with anything! Always assuming everything will be all right, that I come
along and save you!”
Aha. He was worried, she
thought, and a warm feeling washed over her. However that feeling was crushed
when Inuyasha continued:
“You always want to be the
center of everything! You had no fucking right to- to... to steal this fight
from me! I could have handled that idiot myself! But no; you had to came and
get all glowy! And you think you’ve achieved something! Ha! It’s nothing
compared to Kikyou! You’re nothing! How could you even think that my
half-brother would have thought you a worthy opponent?! Now, he’s gone again,
and so is my chance to finally kill that son of a bitch!”
She did understand it, she
really did: He had failed to protect them, failed in defeating his brother.
Instead, a girl had scared the taiyoukai away. Itt bet be blow to his
selfconfidence and pride. And who was the most suitable person to take it out
on? Well, here you have the reincarnation of his former love. Why not pick her?
Kagome felt a bitter feeling wash over her at hearing his words. Why must he
always drag Kikyou into this?
“Stop it!” Came it suddenly.
Sango marched right up to Inuyasha and pushed the startled hanyou back.
“You ungrateful...” Sango was
fuming, but couldn’t find a good word to describe him.
“Dork? Bastard?” Offered
Shippou helpfully. He bared his teeth at Inuyasha; so very angry with him for
yelling all these things to Kagome.
“Yes! You are an ungrateful
bastard! She saved you, and probably all of us, and you have such a large ego
that you can’t even acknowledge that! No; now that ego is hurt you got to take
it out on someone. Well, go to that stupid Kikyou and use her as an outlet for
your anger! I bet she can appreciate it! Then, you can both grumble about hate,
and unfairness! But leave Kagome alone! You got that!?” By now, she was
dangerously swinging her Hiraikotsu at him.
“I completely agree with
Sango. You are acting like a child. Now, sit down and shut up, and let us take
care of those wounds.” Miroku glared at Inuyasha.
“You can go to hell, all of
you!” And suddenly he bolted, and had disappeared in the forest.
spanspan lang=EN-GB style='font-size:10.0pt;mso-bidi-font-size:
12.0pt;font-family:Arial;mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>“Inuyasha!” Kagome yelled
after him. “Come back!” Then, softly: “You’re hurt...”
Miroku sighed deeply at
seeing the worried look in Kagome’s eyes. “He’s not worthy of your feelings.
All he does is hurting you. I don’t know how you can put up with it... And why
does he do it?”
“Maybe because he thinks that
I... I think he’s so very confused... He still doesn’t really know how to
handle his hurt or anger. The only way he knows to blow off steam, is to take
his anger or pain out on somebody else... I think that I’m just convenient for
it.” Miroku looked at her sympatheticly
“Come on, let’s go. There’s
no use in staying here. He’ll catch up with us.” Sango started to walk again,
followy thy the others. Shippou walked beside Kagome, grasping her hand
tightly.
“Kagome?”
“Yeah,” she asked
absent-mindedly.
“Don’t listen to him, Kagome.
He’s a real dork. He’s so stupid.”
“It isn’t easy for him, you
know; all these fights, and than his brother too.”
“So what? He should be a lot
nicer.”
“Thanks, Shippou.”
“Kagome?”
“Yes?”
“I was really worried there,
you know. I thought that Sesshomaru was going to kill you.”
“Me too. I guess we were
lucky.”
“Yeah.”
****
They had made camp that
evening, but still Inuyasha was nowhere to be found. She was getting sick with
worry, and sick with the images she conjured for herself. Maybe he was out
there, dying, or being attacked bmethmething, and couldn’t escape, and... Or,
maybe... She really didn’t want to think about it...
She had worked herself into a
frenzy, unable to sit down, or to read or sleep. Instead, she had taken a short
walk through the forest, within screaming range of the camp of course, to seek
some peace and quiet. She wanted to sort the events and feelings out, and try
to forget the hurtful words of Inuyasha. It had proven to be her biggest
mistake yet.
****
She let herself fall down
with a very deep sigh, and looked at the faint glow of the campfire. She bit
her lip; she was upset, but she didn’t want to cry. Not now. She was so tired
already. If she was to cry now, she wouldn’t be able to stop, and only
succeeded in wearing herself out. So, she fought back the tears, even if the
thought of letting it all out for once was so appealing. She hugged herself; it
was getting a bit chilly now, and she was only wearing her uniform. She had
forgotten her jacket; it was probably lying somewhere in her sleeping bag.
Once more she sighed, then
stood up, and dusted herself off. It was better to get back at the camp anyway;
it was getting very silent, and it was freaking her out! Like something was
approaching... Or about to happen, or- Once again, she had succesfully managed
to scare the wits out of herself. Really, that had to stop sometime soon.
Kagome took a step towards
the camp, when she suddenly heard a twig snap. She whirled around, ready for
anything... Or so she thought. Suddenly she was up close and personal with
someone’s... armour? Oh Gods, no! Her mind screamed. Run!
However, before she c
ev
even so much as move, she was up in the air, dangling from a single clawed hand
that was locked around her throat, making it very difficult to breath. It was
just one thing that registered in her mind:
Sesshouma:p>
She was cluthing his hand
with both of hers, trying to lift the pressure of her throat, but to no avail.
She looked at him; he stood there, face hard and cold, staring at her. No
emotions were seen on his deceptivly angelic face. How could someone so
beautiful be so... cruel? And cold. And homicidal. The only thing that was betraying
somewhat of what he was feeling was his mouth. It stood grim, lips pressed
thightly together. I’m going to die! Kagome thought franticly. His claws were
pressing in the soft skin, drawing blood in some places.
Suddenly he raised his other
hand, and Kagome gasped, if that was so much as possible. His right hand it
was, and it had a large, festering wound in it. A wound caused by her arrow.
She still didn’t have a clue how it had actually gotten in his hand.
“You see this? How did you do
s tos to me? How, Miko! What kind of power is it, that it almost doesn’t heal?
Speak up, wench!” He all but growled at her.
12.0pt;font-family:Arial;mso-ansi-language:EN-GB'>Kagome whimpered; even though
he seemed calm and composed, he was bordering on rage!
“I-I don’t know!” She managed
to bring out.
“Don’t lie to this
Sesshoumaru!”
if]>
“I’m not!! I d-don’t know how
I did it... I don’t know what it does! It just... was there suddenly!” She had
no idea how to explain the sudden rush of power had felt; she didn’t even know
if she could do it again!
He snarled at her, baring his
sharp fangs, and suddenly pulled her closer, until their faces were only a
breath apart. She stared helplessly, frightened into his golden eyes, now
speckled with red.
“I will find out. I will know
what your power is. And then, after you have surved your purpose, I’ll kill
you.” He then dropped her to the ground, and when she looked up, he was gone...
She cimbed on her wobbly
feet, and carefully touched her throat. That was sure going to bruise, and
there was some little puncture ds. ds. How was she going to hide this from her
friends? Because she was going to do that. Why? Because she didn’t want to get
her friends involved... In whatever the Demon Lord wanted... Was he really
going to kill her? What was it that he wanted from her? She didn’t understand
how the Inuyoukai worked... Maybe, he would just forget about her. Right,
maybe. And as long as he wasn’t going to do anything more than roughen her up a
bit, she had no desire to bring Inuyasha into this... There was just no telling
what could happen...
Kagome shoved the red tie of
her uniform somewhat higher over her throat. Though it hurt, she hoped that it,
together with the darkness, would hide the skin. Tomorrow, she would think of
something better.
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