Faithless Love | By : MemoriesVoid Category: InuYasha > General Views: 3066 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0 |
Disclaimer: I do not own InuYasha, nor make money from this story. |
By: Memories Void
Disclaimer: The characters from Inuyasha were created by
RumikoTakahashi and I lay no claim to them.
Chapter 1: Infatuation
She could feel the eyes of a predator watching her, hidden
within the seemingly tranquil forest. Quietly it followed her every move with
its gaze and though she could not see it she could feel it. The air held an
almost electric charge that sent tingles up her spine, the feeling intensified
with every step she took towards the tree line. Despite the disconcerting aura
the girl continued her steady pace forward, never flinching or faltering in her
steps.
In all actuality the scenery was beautiful, emerald leaves
fluttered with the gentle breeze and displayed a few brightly colored birds
perched on the branches of trees. To her left a dragonfly flew about hectically;
but all this was seen from the corner of her eyes. Her gaze was to the west:
into the heart of the forest where her feet were leading her.
Danger lurked within this forest, as it does with all
forests. She had never been one to let danger deter her. Life, she knew, even at
such a young age, was a fleeting thing. Life came and went as suddenly as the
spring rains. Life for her would soon be over. Oh, she would breathe and move,
think and feel and yet… that wasn’t living. Living was what she had been doing
this past year. Now, that was all over.
She sighed and looked wistfully into the clearing a few
yards ahead of her. It was lovely, as always. Long swaying grasses dotted with a
few flowers here and there. But all of that ceased to matter as her eyes
surveyed the area and found the gaze of her silent stalker. The predator stood
before her, watching her with a cool-distant expression on his face. His hair,
long and silver, glittered in the afternoon light but was unruffled by the wind.
For a moment she stood still and willed time to do the
same. What a perfect moment it was. Her eyes softened as she gazed at him, his
high cheekbones accentuated by twin stripes, the proud set of his jaw, broad
shoulders and an otherwise lean frame. The rapid beating of her heart let her
know that time had not stopped. It reminded it would never stop for her. No, it
continued its movement.
“I’m sorry, I guess I’m a bit late,” she smiled sadly at
him and took a few steps forward.
“Three days,” he stated, waiting for her to come nearer.
She didn’t. Nor did she speak. They stood there for a while
in silence, he was studying her, wondering at her odd behavior while she avoided
eye contact.
It was quite obvious to him that something was wrong.
Though he was loathed to admit it, he worried about her. Three days had gone by
without her presence and the worry had drove him to wait for her, as near to her
home as he could approach without drawing suspicion. Now she refused to speak;
hiding something from him, or perhaps not knowing how to speak her mind. It had
never seemed like a problem for her before this. Usually he was trying to keep
her silent, rather then coaxing her to speak.
Another sigh escaped her lips and she kneeled in the long
grass, closing her eyes and turning her face to the sun.
“Today is my last day,” she stated simply, as if that could
answer all his unasked questions.
He waited for her to elaborate, but after a few minutes of
more silence, he swallowed his irritation and thought further on the statement.
“You… are going to die? Has someone threatened your life?”
his eyes narrowed dangerously and it took only a second for him to be standing
directly above her. But his anger quickly dissipated when she shook her head and
looked at him oddly.
“No, of course not. Who would care enough to take my life?”
she asked, frowning down at her clasped hands. “That wasn’t what I meant.”
His jaw clenched, the only sign of his annoyance he
allowed. The girl was not making any sense. That’s not to say that she ever made
much sense, but she had never before spoken in riddles as she was doing now.
She sighed again and glanced up at the demon through her
thick bangs. Her eyes began to water as she thought about never seeing him again
but she fought against the tears and sniffled just a bit.
It had been love at first sight for her. Or perhaps love at
first sound? It was his voice she had heard first as she lay in the long grass
of the very same field that she now sat in. ‘Girl, what are you doing?’ those
were his first words to her and her heart had skipped a beat at the sound of his
deep baritone voice. When she opened her eyes to look up at him the deal had
been sealed. It was love, definitely. She had never liked Sesshoumaru. It
had been love from the beginning.
As to how Sesshoumaru felt about her… Well, it was anyone’s
guess. His emotions never showed on his face and he most certainly never spoke
of them. Even when he had spoken of the recent death of his father he had
remained stoic. Still, he must feel some sort of fondness for her, why else
would he have continued to meet her day after day for so many months? It no
longer mattered because as she had stated, this was her last day.
“I’m being sent away,” she whispered, watching as his right
hand closed to form a fist.
One breath, two breaths, just as she was going to take the
third she fell backwards under the weight of his body. His legs straddled hers,
their chests were pressed firmly together and he buried his face in the space
between her shoulder and neck. Tentatively, her arms went around him and she
embraced him for the first time. The tears, which she had been fighting against,
began to fall.
There was no time to comprehend what was happening, no time
for her to blush or stutter because before she really realized what was
happening he was kissing her. Soft, warm lips pressed against hers and she
shuddered when his tongue entered her mouth. It was the feeling of his hands
parting the opening of her kimono that awakened her from the dreamy daze she was
in.
“Sesshoumaru, no!” she gasped, turning her head to the
side. Away from him, away from those deep amber eyes, away from his tantalizing
lips. She felt so far away from him despite the fact he was right above her.
‘This could have been heaven,’ she thought, ‘If this had
happened a month ago… a week ago… three days ago… It could have been my dream.
If this had happened when I was myself. But now, I can’t. I belong to someone
else now.’
It was almost physically painful when he sat up and moved
away from her, refusing to meet her gaze.
“You love me,” he said with his usual confidence. It had
been right; it had felt right--even to him. Then she had said ‘no,’ and he
couldn’t understand why.
Her long lashes brushed against her moist cheeks as she lay
in the grass.
“Three days ago I met my husband,” she explained in a
hushed tone, deepened by despair. “It was arranged by my uncle a year ago but at
the time I had asked him to wait. To give me a year to adjust because my parents
had just died… and now… now my year is up and I’ll be leaving in two days with
the man who will be my husband.”
“Kagome…” her name rolled smoothly off his tongue but she
could not bear to look at him and so she kept her eyes shut, staring into the
darkness of her eyelids. It was silent for a long minute and then he spoke
again.
“I see,” there was a brush of warm lips against her
forehead and the sound of shuffling grass and then nothing-nothing but the call
of a lonely bird that echoed in her ears for hours.
The walk home was lonely and uneventful. Her heart had
never felt so heavy, her life never so burdened. Not even with the death of her
parents over a year ago. But there had still been hope then; hope that her life
would turn into something wonderful. Even after meeting with her future husband
there had been hope, the hope that she would be swept away from it all. The hope
that the person she loved would want her and take her away to be with him. But
that hope had died the moment he left that clearing.
When the estate of her uncle came into view Kagome took a
deep-steadying breath before continuing through the gates. No doubt she would be
reprimanded for sneaking out this morning. Would he be suspicious as to where
she had been all day? It had never bothered him before if she went missing for a
few hours each day. But now, she was under the care of someone else. Wouldn’t
her husband-to-be harbor suspicion as to where she had disappeared to?
‘It really doesn’t matter anymore,’ she decided, ‘I’ll have
the rest of my life to make it up to him whether I want to or not.’
The young woman sighed, looking down at her simple kimono.
It was fine for venturing through the forest, but as dinner-wear it was
unacceptable, so instead of going straight to the dining room she made a detour
towards her own chambers. The house was unusually quiet and she didn’t see any
of the usual scurrying servants about. She was thankful to have a bit of
solitude for the moment. Even the maid who usually loitered about her room was
missing, along with most of her belongings. It had all been packed away
apparently, being readied for her departure in a few days. The only things left
were her futon and a single chest containing a few kimonos.
Seeing the scarce room struck a chord in her. Though she
had thought that there were no more tears for her to cry, she once again felt a
trail of moisture running down her cheek. There was no helping it; she threw
herself dramatically onto her futon. The soft, worn cotton blanket she wrapped around
her was nothing compared to the grief that felt like a tangible thing
surrounding her. It would seem that dinner was out of the question. She really
wasn’t all that hungry anyways.
It was dark out, the moon nothing but a sliver was hiding
behind heavy gray clouds that matched his mood. Even from the balcony his youkai
ears could pick up the soft-even breaths of the female currently sleeping on his
futon. She had served as a distraction for a few hours, but it wasn’t enough.
Thoughts of her still plagued him. Sparkling sapphire eyes as deep as the
sea haunted him every time his eyes closed and the sweet flowery scent of her
raven hair still clung to him. Even as he had been panting and thrusting above
the youkai female of his choice, the sound of her depressed voice lingered in
his mind. Her name had come unbidden to his lips as he came, just a tiny whisper
only he could hear. This would simply not do.
If he were to retain his sanity all thoughts of Kagome must
be driven from his mind. She was nothing, just another human woman, just another
distraction. Their time together had been pleasant, he reluctantly admitted to
himself, but now it was over. He would harden his heart and move on, never to
give thought to her again. It was best for the both of them that way.
Now all he had to do was think of a way to forget her.
Apparently enjoying the company of other females was not effective. Nor was it
in all actuality enjoyable. Not when the memory of the young human woman pressed
against him, kissing and embracing him, was still etched into his memory…
Sesshoumaru groaned in frustration. Perhaps it was okay,
just for tonight, to live in the past. So, he closed his eyes and remembered.
He recalled the first time he had stumbled upon her, laying
in the grass with one dainty hand reaching out towards the sky. He recalled the
excuse he had given himself when returning to meet her the next day, ‘Just to
make sure she is not trespassing on my lands again.’ Then he remembered the way
she looked after having fell into the river, her kimono clinging to her body,
accentuating her feminine curves and how the sight made his blood boil. He had
given her his haori to wear while her kimono dried and he recalled the
admiration in her eyes as she gazed at his bare chest. But in the next moment
her eyes had softened and he had known then, that she loved him. He had also
known, instinctively, that her feelings were love and not just infatuation or
lust. He remembered making the decision that her feelings were inconsequential
and beneath him-All of this he remembered and more. Then, when he finally opened
his eyes, the sun had begun to rise, painting the sky pink-and her soft scent
had not left him. Neither had the unfamiliar ache in his chest, so he leapt off
the balcony and ran further into the west--away from something that could
possibly be called his weakness.
‘Stay calm. Breathe. Smile. Be polite. But most
importantly, don’t think about him.’ It was a lost cause and Kagome knew
it. Oh, everything but the last rule was easy enough to follow but it was the
last one that made the other four difficult. She had awoken this morning with a
headache and red eyes, gifts that her tears had left behind. But of course that
did not excuse her from breakfast and a lecture from her uncle this morning. So
as usual, a maid had come to wake her and make her ready for the morning meal.
Despite the utter futility of it, she repeated her own
little set of rules in her head over and over again while walking towards the
dining room. Gently, she slid the shouji screen open and entered the dining
room, immediately going to her knees and bowing to the inhabitants.
“Good morning, uncle and Lord Hojou,” she said, before
standing and going to her place beside the man she would marry. He smiled at
her, his brown eyes gentle and warm.
“Good morning Lady Kagome. We missed you at dinner last
night. Are you feeling well?”
The question caught her off guard as she was about to take
a sip of her miso soup and she found herself biting into her bottom lip to keep
from crying. Beside her the young lord noticed how her back went stiff and a
dazed look came over her eyes. Leaning towards her, he rubbed at her back
soothingly.
“Are you alright? Perhaps you should go back to your room
and rest,” he suggested, his voice full of concern.
It took a moment but Kagome once again had herself under
control and was thankful for Hojou’s kindness. If nothing else, she knew he
would never treat her badly. She would never love him, but in time she could
grow to care for him. Perhaps she would be okay. Life would go on; even if at
night she would always dream of silver hair and golden eyes.
After the kindness Hojou had shown her during breakfast,
Kagome did not have the heart to deny the young lord the presence of her company
when he so politely asked for her to join him in a short walk around the
gardens. His company was pleasant enough, and they made light conversation of
many trivial matters.
As the morning sun continued to raise high into the sky and
the day warmed, they decided to rest beneath a cherry-blossom tree. It was still
too early for the flowers to bloom, but it at least offered an ample amount of
shade. For a few moments they sat in comfortable silence, each caught up in
their own thoughts.
Kagome shook her head in an attempt to clear her thoughts,
beside her, Hojou cleared his throat and so she turned to look at him. Their
gazes met over the scant foot of space between them and their movements stilled.
“Lady Kagome,” the young man began, taking one of her hands
between the both of his, “I want you to know that despite this being a marriage
arranged by our guardians, that I will respect and honor you in all ways. I’m
not quite sure how I feel about all this quite yet, but… I’m sure that we will
get along well.”
His words were kind and comforting in a way. But they were
not enough. She found she had no words to reply and so she just nodded her head
in understanding. Seeing this, Hojou smiled and motioned to a servant who stood
a few yards away.
“I have something for you,” he said, pointing towards
another servant who was approaching them with a large bundle in his arms. The
package was set before her and Kagome curiously peeled away the paper it was
wrapped in.
A kimono. Three layers, one the plain white under-kimono,
the next an airy blue color and the outer-kimono was a deep, rich blue.
“It matches your eyes,” Hojou said and smiled, running a
hand over the silk fabric, tracing the silver embroidery.
“It’s beautiful,” she whispered hoarsely. There were tears
in her eyes because all she could think was that it would look magnificent if
she were standing beside Sesshoumaru.
Author’s note: Be kind-Rewind… or review. Yeah,
that second one.
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