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Rash Decisions: Pt 1--A Loss Too Much To Bear	By : XxSangoxX Category: InuYasha > Het - Male/Female > InuYasha/Kagome Views: 1298 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own InuYasha, nor make money from this story.

Chapter List
- 1-Rash Decisions
- 1
            He acted as
if he didn’t care… that she was gone and that she was never coming back. He acted like it didn’t bother him that he
was unable to protect her when it came down to her final hours. Sango knew better. One day when her beloved Miroku had taken
Shippo to learn how to fish, Sango chose to stay behind and console her hanyou
friend.

            “Inuyasha?” She called out to the trees, but he was no
where to be found. Finally, it clicked
in her head where he probably was. As
she made her way towards the makeshift gravesite of Inuyasha’s mother, she saw
the red of the fire rat cloth gleaming…standing out like a warning. She walked over to him and noticed his stoic
face was streaked in tears; his eyes
puffy. Walking up beside him, he barely
acknowledged her presence. As she sat
beside him, she rested her hand on his strong shoulder. They were silent for quite a while until
Inuyasha finally spoke, in a very broken tone.

            “I… I
didn’t save her. I can’t believe I
couldn’t… save her.” Sango felt a lump
form in her throat as his amber eyes looked at her through a blaze of unshed
tears. She put her arms around him and
let him cry. Inuyasha never cried… they
had only seen him do it twice, once when he thought that Kagome was going to
die from the fire, and the other time as he held her dying body in his
arms.

            “Shhh… its
okay Inuyasha. She pulled back and
looked into his swollen eyes. He looked
like he hadn’t slept in months… possibly true.
Putting a hand to his face she looked at her friends grave, remembering
when they laid her soul to rest.
Inuyasha had insisted that she be buried beside his mother, and when
they did, he refused to even attend.
Instead Inuyasha went through the well to console Kagome’s mother,
apologizing profusely to her for not protecting her daughter. Her sullen response was simply ‘Inuyasha,
please don’t blame yourself. She chose
to be there with you knowing the dangers.
Please do not blame yourself.’
But he did. Damnit if he didn’t
blame himself everyday… he blamed himself for not protecting her, for not being
able to revive her… mostly though, he blamed himself for not telling her that
he loved her with all his heart. As if
reading his mind Sango looked back to her friend who now sat staring at his
beloved’s grave stone. “Inuyasha? There’s something that I need to tell
you.” She looked down and noticed a
small patch of Sakura tree flowers placed over the stone. Inuyasha never looked away from them, he
simply let out a sigh and held himself with his crossed arms. She opted to continue. “Inuyasha she knew. I hope you know that… she knew that you loved
her…and…” she stopped as his eyes shot back to hers. There was a hopeful gleam of passion showing
through. Her voice became quiet and she
continued… almost in a whisper. “She
loved you more than you could ever know.”
He sighed and placed a hand on her tomb.
Standing he responded to the ex-demon slayer that sat at his feet.

            “I really
don’t think she could have known just how much I will always love her
Sango. But thank you so much. Now please, I need to be alone with my mother
and my Kagome.” His voice became quiet
at the mention of her name. Sango
collected her bearings and stood. Wiping
away some tears of her own, she walked over to Inuyasha and hugged him
tightly. “Thank you Sango.” He tearfully
whispered.

            She walked
back to the village to find that Miroku had been left to cook the fish on his
own. Sitting beside him and faking a
smile, he put his arm around her shoulder.

            “Oh Miroku,
he’s not getting any better… he never leaves the graves now… I am getting so
worried, this is not what Kagome would have wanted.” Miroku looked at her and wiped a tear from
her cheek.

            “I don’t
know what to do anymore my dearest, Lady Kagome is gone now and… there was
nothing that we could have done to save…”
He stopped as Shippo made his appearance at the fire.

            “I’m
hungry… are we gonna eat yet?” he
cried. Shippo was unaware of the death
of his adopted mother, they had lied to the young kitsune and told him that she
had simply been in a rush to get home to her own time. He had been saddened that she wouldn’t say
goodbye, but other than that… they just didn’t want him to have to face yet
another death of someone that he loved so dearly. Because of this, He was unaware of the
reason’s for Inuyasha’s sulking. Miroku
handed Shippo a small twig with some fish sliced on it and headed off to find
Inuyasha.

            “Hey
Inuyasha! I have some food for you.” He
said to him as he came up beside him at the side of the river.

            “Not hungry
Miroku… but thanks anyway.” The monk
looked concerned.

            “Inuyasha,
you know … I know how much this hurts...”
Inuyasha shot him a glare.

            “You have
no clue how I feel.. how much this is KILLING me… you told Sango how you felt, you still have her breathing beside
you. I don’t have Kagome, and its my
fault that she isn’t here… you couldn’t possibly
how it is that I feel.” He looked away
off to the horizon. Miroku hung his
head.

            “Okay, so I
don’t know how you feel, and I am sorry for assuming that I could… but
Inuyasha, you know you need to eat. You
need to sleep, you need to live your life.
Don’t you think she would have wanted you to?” After the deliberation, Miroku realized that
it was a losing battle and placing the fish beside him, he walked back. Inuyasha simply threw the cooked food into
the river whence it came. He didn’t
deserve to live.

            That night,
he sat in the hut that she had once occupied… rolling the now purified and
completed jewel in his hands. Suddenly
he realized… the wish! It was then that he knew what he had to do.
- 1
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Rash Decisions: Pt 1--A Loss Too Much To Bear